Sweet Home Alabama
by NewTwilightEclipse
Summary: Jasper has been alone for over 100 years, so what happens when he meets his singer Joanna. Can he resist her blood in order to love her as he wants, or will she be just another snack? JxOc AxOc
1. Joanna McCarty

_**I know most people don't like Alice and Jasper broken up but I love this story that I had on Quizilla, so please give it a chance! Ok As you can probibly tell Alice and Jasper are not together they are just extremely close! In this one Bella is also a vampire and has been for a while because this is her first year back at school! Plus Alice is my favorite girl so I gave am giving her someone to!**_

This had to be the most boring day of the whole summer, if you could call it summer around here. Trees covered just about every inch of sky and even the clear parts practically no sun got through from the clouds. However I loved it here this was my home this was the place I grew up, this was Elkmont, Alabama population 470. I didn't mid it being the most boring day because it was still going to be better than tomorrow, the first day of school. I hated school, not because of the work (that was all easy for me) but more for being myself. I was different than most of the kids around here in this was a small southern town where you expected all the kids to dress one certain way and talk with a southern accent and most of them did except my twin brother Dominic and I. We both dressed scene or Goth as the people call us around here. Goth was no were near scene and Dominic and I stressed that as much as we could but we were always the freaky goth kids who got shoved into lockers or pushed around. Our mother said that if we dressed and talked like we did when we were younger we would have other friends besides each other, but Dominic was the only friends I needed.

"Hey Joanna" I heard Dominic's quiet voice say as he walked into my room. I looked over at him, the biggest difference with us was our heights he stood at 6'0 and I stood at 4'11. Other than that we were normal twins, both of us with black hair and Hazel eyes. I did have a chubbier face then he did but thats it, other than the fact that I was a girl.

"Whats up bro?" I asked him stretching out my legs.

"Its time for dinner mom said get down stairs now." I rolled my eyes, my mom had told me earlier to go down stairs that dinner was done but I didn't feel like going so now she was sending Dominic to get me.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah I'm going." I stood up and walked down stairs with Dominic.

My mother was putting our plates on the table when we arrived in the kitchen. I sat down at the table and looked at the empty place at the table. My fathers. My dad was in Iraq now and wouldn't be back for a while. He was the thing that kept my mother sane when he was gone like now she doesn't know what to do. That's the reason I acted like I did with my mom. Believe me I loved her but I hated how she acted when my dad wasn't around. I mean I have never had a boyfriend in my life and I wasn't lost or what ever she was.

"There you are Joanna!" my mom said in her think southern accent, I had one to but I learned to hide it except when I was angry or really upset.

"Yeah I was daydreaming when you first called me." I said rolling my eyes. I saw Dominic try to

Hide a laugh from across the table. My mother ignored me and sat down and led us in saying grace.

"Oh heavenly father we thank you for all you have given us. We thank you for keeping us safe and keeping all of those around us safe. And lord please bring Henry back safe. In Jesus name Amen."

"Amen" Dominic and I said in unison. I thought about my father as we ate. How was he doing? What was he doing? And was he ok?

"So there is a new doctor in town." my mom said smiling. She worked at the hospital and always loved to tell us about her day. "His name is Carlisle Cullen." I laughed were was this guy from? Who named their kid Carlisle? My mom shot a glare at me. "Well as I was saying he is very nice and very good looking." Dominic and I looked at her, she was married she wasn't suppose to be checking out guys! "He is so young but he has been to so many good schools! I'm surprised he would want to work here." she finished.

"Well if he's as good as you say maybe he can fix Joanna." Dominic said laughing.

"Oh shut up!" I said smiling "Mr. I fall off the roof." he gave me a look.

"Mine was on accident! You jumped off the bridge and broke your legs for fun!" I smiled at the memory. It was the most exciting thing I'd done, even with the wheelchair.

"Ok you two, we are not having this conversation any more!" she warned "Now eat!"

We finished our meal in silence but Dominic and I would start laughing for no reason. Well I couldn't get the name Carlisle out of my head. What century was this guy born in? I had no idea what Dominic was laughing about it might have been the same thing but then again it might not have been

After a while of just sitting down laughing my mother sent the two of us to bed. We said goodnight then went into our bedrooms. I couldn't sleep, I was still used to staying up practically all night and I didn't want to stop. Also the thought of seeing the people at school made me nauseous, I didn't mind what they said it was just the being pushed around part that I didn't like.

_**Tell me how you feel! I know its not very good but its just the opening it will get better! **_


	2. No humanity

_**Here is the next chapter!!**_

I didn't mind being woke up early nor did I mind water, but when Dominic woke me up early with water, that made me mad. I chased him but thanks to his long legs never caught up. Eventually I gave up after my mom said to stop that is. I dried off and changed into my clothes; ripped jeans, anime t-ee, my two favorite belts, my bracelets, earrings and my lip rig. Then I applied my make up all eye liner and mascara, no details needed just a lot! I grabbed my things and went down stairs, Dominic wasn't down stairs yet (most likely still fixing his hair) but my mom was.

She sighed "Honey, you know you would get more friends if you dressed like you did when you were younger." I knew she meant well but it made me mad. If I wanted to dress like the other kids I would but I clearly didn't want to.

"Mom I'm ready!" Dominic said as he came down the stairs. He was wearing a dark purple shirt and dark jeans, he had a studded belt hanging off his hips and his hair was up in different places, it looked really cool.

"It took you long enough!" she said as he rolled his eyes. She gave us our money for lunch and we took off outside. "Love you! Behave, have fun , and don't get into trouble." I heard her well this but I was to busy to acknowledge it. Dominic and I had started a game were who ever got to the truck first got to drive, which I thought was unfair because he always won. This time was no different.

"I won again!" he said starting the truck. I stuck my tongue out at him.

"You only win because you have longer legs and you know it!" I looked out the window at the trees and cloud covered sky. "If you were my height I would beat you."

He laughed "Well I am not your height so I will never know." He enjoyed that fact to the extreme.

I rolled my eyes and continued to look out the window. Today was going to be something, I kept telling my self that I would get to go to history class (I'm the best at history, give me a date I will give you what happened) but that didn't help. The people at school were what made my skin crawl and made school outside of history hell. I sighed and looked over at my brother and above him I saw a boy about his age in old pirate attire. This brought a smile to my face as well as a shiver down my spine, ever since I could remember I saw people as they were in past lives and give great details about there lives as well as emotions. I didn't see them all the time but I saw them often enough to scare me, these things just showed up when they wanted to and I had no control over it.

We were now at the Elkmont high school, or hell as I called it. A few kids were outside sitting on cars and messing around with there friends and some were staring at Dominic and I. I could see a few spirits above people as they walked by, the spirits seemed to be nicer than the kids but maybe it was just a façade. I got out of the car and ignored a few of the girls words and looked around. I then spotted two cars that did not fit in, a silver Volvo and a red BMW M3 convertible. Those were not there last year, and I had never seen anyone in one around here. I held in a laugh as I noticed the number of guys gathered around the convertible, I loved cars as well but there was really no reason to gawk at it.

"Well it looks like we have some new kids." Dominic said.

"Well way to go captain obvious!" I said holding up my hand for a high five. He smacked my hand then smiled.

"Why thank you Joanna!" I laughed at him.

I looked around at the people again but this time saw two unbelievably gorgeous people holding hands. One was the prettiest girl I had ever seen, she seriously made Heidi Klum look ugly (don't ask me how I know that name). Next to her was a very tall very built man, he was in high school but never would I call him a boy. The strangest thing about the pair was there eyes and skin, both had very pale skin, and there eyes were a beautiful gold color but they had purple bruise like markings around their eyes. I looked at Dominic who was getting his bag then back to the people. When I did I gasped, I was used to seeing people past lives but not like I saw theirs or really how I saw them. The girl flashed back and forth between a well dressed girl from 30's, this one was full of pride. The next one shocked me, it was the same girl but her hair was matted with blood, her face was bruised, her close were torn and she held the uttermost sadness. The man did she same flashed from a care free person in old time hunter clothes to possibly the most disgusting thing I had ever seen. He was covered in blood ,scratches down his face and all along his torn clothes.

"Joanna are you ok?" Dominic asked with deep concern. The two changed back to the way I first saw them then walked in the building. I turned to Dominic and nodded as the bell rang.

I hurried inside ignoring the stairs I received from the people in the halls. First was Advanced lit. with my favorite teacher Mrs. Heflin. I had her for my freshman and Sophomore years and now I had her as a Junior. It had been the same with my History teacher Mr. Woods, I will most likely have them next year as well. Mrs. Heflin was the nicest person I knew and she cared for just about everyone. As I walked into the class she gave me a hug.

"Joanna how have you been?" she asked smiling. I couldn't help but smile back.

"Its been fine, my dad sent us a few pictures from Iraqi." I said smiling as she nodded and started greeting the students coming in the class,

I walked to my seat in the back of the class and sat down. I looked at the room, it was split in two but was still open. The front of the class was bright and had a lot of chairs in it, the back were I sat had only six desks and it was darker than the other part. As the desks in the front were filled I saw three people who looked like the other two I saw earlier. The only male was a little taller than Dominic by a little, his hair was a bronze color and he looked more like he belonged in high school than the other guy I had seen. Standing very close to him was a shy looking girl, she had brown hair and a slightly round face, he wasn't very tall about medium height. He final girl seemed to be about my height but was skinner than me by a lot. She looked like a pixie to be frank, her short black hair stuck up every where, her nose was pointed, heck her ears seemed pointed. All three of them had the same pale skin, gold eyes, and purple bruise markings around their eyes.

"Class these are your new classmates, will you please state your names." Mrs. Heflin said smiling.

"Edward Cullen" "Alice Cullen" "Bella Hale" **((I used Hale because she can pass off as Esme's niece better than Rose and Jasper could.))**

They must have been Carlisle's children, but my mom said he was rather young. They had to be his kinds some how, but Edward and Alice looked nothing a like.

"Thank you now you can go have a seat with Joanna in the back." she said smiling. Why me? People were already staring at them and if they sit by me they will sit and compare!I saw Edward smirk as he watched Alice sit next to me and Bella behind her. Edward sat behind Bella and played with a strand of her hair, Bella smiling and looked down.

"Ok Class since we have three new students we will introduce ourselves." the class groaned. "You will stand up, state your first and last name, favorite color something you like to do, and just a random detail about yourself." Mrs. Heflin pointed to Jose to start. After the whole front of the class went it was my turn. I stood up and cleared my throat.

"I'm Joanna and I am the biggest freak in school." a boy named Robert said smirking. I felt like crying at that moment. _Don't cry, don't cry! _Edward looked at me then sent a scowl towards Robert.

"This is your first and only warning Mr. Acosta! Do something like that again and you will be in detention." Mrs. Heflin scolded him. "Go ahead Joanna."

I nodded "My name is Joanna McCarty" I saw Edward, Bella and Alice's eyes widen. "My favorite color is Green, I love history, and I have a twin brother named Dominic." I sat down quickly as Alice shot up.

"My name is Alice Cullen, I like a lot of colors so I don't have one favorite, I absolutely love shopping, and I live with my adopted brothers Edward and Emmett, my adopted mothers nieces and nephew Bella, Rosalie and Jasper. And my adopted mother and father Esme and Carlisle." Now it made since how they were related adoption, but I couldn't have imagined taking in that many people, Carlisle and Esme must have been the nicest people in the world. I saw Edward smile and nod his head in my direction. I looked at him for a moment then looked at Bella who stood up.

"My name is Isabella Hale, my favorite color is brown, I like to read, and I have two twin siblings Rosalie and Jasper." I liked her answer short and simple.

Edward smiled at her then stood up. "My name is Edward Cullen, my favorite color is green, I love to play the piano, and I am going out with Bella." He shot a crooked grin in her direction, causing her to look down.

"Oh we have a Lover boy." Mrs. Heflin said raising her eyebrows causing the whole class to laugh.

She then told us to write down something interesting that happened over the summer. I decided to write about my dad coming home for a while but I finished that quickly. I then thought about the Cullen's. I figured that The blond girl was Rosalie and the big guy was Emmett, so the only one I hadn't seen was Jasper. I turned to look at the three of them but saw what I saw before, Edward changed from a smiling green eyed boy, to some one who looked deathly ill. Alice went from a little girl with long black hair to a girl in a hurt girl in a straight jacket with hair as it was now. Bella how ever did have a spirit above her, it was an old French girl from maybe the 1800's.

Edward looked at me strangely. "So does what that boy did happen a lot?" looked at him shocked. Was he really talking to me? I noticed Alice and Bella were looking at me as well.

"Um yeah it does." I said nervously looking at the three of them.

"Why?" Alice said with an irritated look on her face. "What's wrong with you!"

"I'm a freak, what else?" I asked looking at her incredulously.

She scoffed and shook her head. "Nope your not a freak! You seem really cool." Was she really talking about me?

"You do seem nice." Bella said quietly, I saw Edward smile an nod.

"Uh thanks?" I didn't mean for it to sound like a question but it did. I just couldn't believe they were talking to me. They were all so perfect looking and acted as if they were perfect as well, and I was boring. When the bell rang I stood up and waited by the door for the others to leave. As I stepped out into the hall I saw Alice Edward and Bella walk past me.

"See you later Joanna!" Alice's high voice said as she walked bye.

I nodded as she disappeared into the crowd. I walked to my next class and arrived first as usual. I didn't have any class with Dominic other than History so unless I had Edward, Bella, or Alice I was on my own. Just as I figured I had no one for my other six classes. I sat alone doing my work and not talking, my mid wondered to the missing Cullen. Jasper Hale, they said he was Rosalie's twin so was he extremely beautiful like her or did they look nothing a like?

Just was I had figured I had no classes with any of the Cullen's so I was alone. When lunch came Dominic and I ate outside while every one else was inside. He told me about how he had a class with Alice and how she seemed like she didn't want to be near him in the beginning but as class went on she never shut up. Then he said something that made no since to me, he said her eyes were black. I knew her eyes had been gold but I kept it to myself. Class was overly boring, it was all introductions and learning the rules, we didn't have one lesson! I sighed as I headed to History class. On my way there I bumped into Emmett Cullen.

"Oh sorry!" he said laughing. I saw Rosalie pull on his arm to get him to go.

"Its ok." I said shocked he was apologizing. He nodded then walked away with Rosalie. Emmett looked like an all around happy guy, and he has a goddess like Rosalie I would be mad if he wasn't!

Dominic was leaning against the wall waiting for me outside of Mr. Woods classroom. I walked up to him and the two of us walked in and took our seats in the front of the class. Mr. Woods was writing notes on the bored when he turned to us.

"Oh my is Dominic McCarty!" He said smiling. "I have the Dominic McCarty in my class!" We both laughed, he started that last year.

"Hey Coach!" Dominic said smiling. Mr. Woods was the coach for the tennis team here so people called him Mr. Coach Woods a lot.

People started filling the class so he walked to the door and greeted them. I then heard a desk being pulled up next to mine. I looked over and saw Alice Cullen's smiling face, however she did have darker eyes than before.

"Hey Joanna, Dominic!" Alice said waving enthusiastically. She was still the most hyper person I had ever meet.

"Hey Alice." Dominic said quietly looking down. I smiled I could tell he liked her, but then I frowned, how did she feel about him?

"What's up?" I asked her smiling back. She forced herself to look at me and not Dominic.

"Nothing really but you guys have a good school!" She said happily as Mr., Woods walked up to the front of the class room.

He looked around and smiled "Ahh fresh meat!" he said looking down at Alice as everyone started laughing. She smiled up at him. "So little one what's your name?" he asked.

"I'm Alice Cullen! I moved here with all of the Cullen's and Hale's" she said nodding.

"Hale? So then you know Jasper Hale?" I looked at him more interested now. I didn't know why but Jasper seemed to perk my interest.

"Yeah I do he is my best friend!" He nodded an smiled.

"I had him two periods ago!" he shook his head. "I asked random people to tell me what they knew about different parts of history and I told him to tell me what he knew about the civil war, and boy he could give Joanna here a run for her money!" Alice laughed at some kind of inside joke and I just glared at him. No one was as good as I was in History, No one! Mr. Woods then started talking about the rules and a few stories and on the ways this class was going to work. I loved hearing it, rules anything he made all of it sound fun and exciting. When the bell rang Alice Dominic and I stayed late in his class while every one else headed home. Alice needed to know what she was going to need for this class because she didn't get it before and Dominic and I just wanted to stay and help her.

When she had all of the information she would need we left the class and we seemed to be the only ones left in the building. We walked to the front doors then I remembered I left my bag in my locker. I told the two of them I would go get it but Alice wanted to go with me so we let Dominic go to the truck.

"So your brother seems really nice." she said smiling. I opened my locker and we started walking away.

"I'm nice to!" we turned to see Robert standing against the lockers. He was smirking clearly thinking he looked hot.

"Oh whatever, just go away Alice wouldn't be interested in a pig like you!" I said rolling my eyes. Alice laughed but stopped when Robert walked over to us.

"No one was talking to you freak!" he yelled pushing me into another hall way. I heard him run off and looked up to see the Cullen's. They all had semi shocked look's on their faces but not one of them matched a tall blond boy. I figured this was Jasper but I was to afraid to dwell on that thought long.

Jasper looked crazed to say the least. His eyes were pitch black, and his teeth were bared, he truly looked in pain. He was crouched low and he was shaking like mad. I was afraid of this beautiful person. I think Emmett and Edward grabbed him but I was turned around to fact to see.

"Oh well look at the time lets get out of here before you brother comes looking for you." she was trying to be peppy but I could hear a strain on her voice. I was however to shocked to answer, Jasper looked like he was going to eat me back there. Before I knew it we were outside and Alice was walking back into the building. "Well bye I will see you tomorrow." she said as she ran off into the school. I walked or ran over to the truck and climbed in.

"Are you ok?" Dominic asked as I got in. I simply nodded as Dominic drove away from the school.

When we arrived home my mother was at work, so I simply ran up to my room and laid down. I locked my door so Dominic couldn't get in, but he did bang on the door for a while. I thought of Jasper, he was no doubt beautiful but he was a freighting person. He did look like Rosalie, tall blond and simply gorgeous. I also thought of the other Cullens their voices mostly, even the guys had such whimsical voices that made mine sound raspy and horrible. Every thing about them made me fill unequal, as if I wasn't fit to stand in their presents.

My mother got home a little after seven and went straight to making dinner. Dominic must have told her something was up because my mother didn't call me once before dinner was ready. When she did call me I tried to cheer up as much as possible as I headed down stairs.

"Hey Mom!" I said as I sat next to Dominic was looked at me confused. I shrugged my shoulders as my mom put our plates in front of us.

"Hey Joanna sweaty, did school tire you out Dominic told me you fell asleep when you got home." she said as she sat down. I nodded and smiled at Dominic thankful he didn't just tell her I was freaking out.

When dinner was done Dominic followed me to my room. Sat on my bed and he sat in a chair across from me.

"So what happened?" he asked looking me straight in the eyes.

I didn't want to tell him but I never hid anything so I told him. When I was done telling him what happened he looked at me shocked.

"So you were really afraid of him?" he asked.

I though for a moment, I was but at the same time I wasn't. It was like I had anther emotion being forced into me. "I'm not sure." I answered as I heard my mother yell it was time for bed. Dominic said goodnight as he walked out.

As soon as I laid down I fell asleep. I dreamt of Jasper that night, but it was more of a nightmare. He was dressed in old clothes and had blood red eyes, and blood stained clothes. He was just standing their with a woman covered in blood as well. Jasper looked so savage like there was no ounce of humanity left in him, like he did when he saw me.

_**Thanks for reading leave comments!**_


	3. Starting to get to me

_**So here is my update! Its kinda long, so I hope its ok. **_

For the next week I never even saw Jasper, it was almost like he was trying to stay away from me. The only ones who talked to me where Alice, Bella and every so often Edward. Dominic and I continued to eat outside and talk, he mostly talked about Alice and how nice she was. I mostly thought about Jasper, Why did he act like that? I know he wasn't like that all day I would have heard of a psychopath. The first week of school was all in all like the other weeks of last year, horrible.

When I woke up it was raining heavily and looked like it had been for a while, so the ground was most likely all muddy and soggy. I looked out the window and saw that my mothers car wasn't here. _She must have gone to work early. _I thought as I grabbed my clothes out of my closet and put them on. I had woken up early so I took my time in getting ready, I mostly thought of the Cullen's something was strange about them, they all had the same eyes and skin tone, yet none of them were related. I tried to take my thoughts away from them but I couldn't seem to, they stayed in my thoughts. The Cullen's were the only thing on my mind the whole way to school. When we got to school I looked out my window at the people walking around. Not many people were here this early school didn't start for another twenty five minutes.

"Come one lets just go in." Dominic said getting out of the truck. I sighed and did the same. There were only a few cars here including the Cullen's. I frowned and looked away from the cars focusing on the school. The halls were practically empty with a teacher or student coming out of a class room every so often.

"Hey Joanna!" Alice's hyper voice said in front of me. Dominic was already gone (most likely to his first class.)

"Oh!" I said surprised "Hey Alice!" I said cheering up. I don't know why but Alice just seemed to have that effect on me.

"Hey my friend Jasper wants to meet you!" I froze, I didn't want to meet him or I did but I was afraid to. I didn't want to seem rude or offend her so I simply nodded and held back my fear. Alice led me to the cafeteria where most people who were here were. There were only twelve people in here besides the Cullen's and Hale's who were sitting in the farthest corner of the room. I swallowed hard and looked at Alice who was still smiling.

"Oh you will be ok!" she said in a knowing voice.

I looked at her then looked at the others Bella was smiling at me and Alice, Rosalie was messing with her cell phone looking at Jasper every now and then, Edward and Emmett were both sitting in front of Jasper smiling slightly. Jasper was sitting in a chair behind Edward and Emmett biting his lip. I had to admit he looked amazing, his blond hair was falling in his eyes, his pale skin and gold eyes the markings made his eyes stand out amazingly. I looked at his eyes carefully, they were black yesterday but now they were a dark gold.

"Hey, you're the girl I ran into yesterday!" Emmett roared laughing. At that moment I felt like doing an anime sweat drop, but this is real life so none of that!

"Yeah I'm the one!" I said laughing slightly. I didn't want to look at any of them, I felt like I was inferior to them. From the way I looked, acted, talked, write and how smart I was. Before yesterday I was the smartest one here but now I was even being beat in history, the only thing I was recognized for here. I felt like I was going o cry for a moment when a wave of calmness overcame me.

"No need to feel bad about it, Emmett is the one who should feel bad. He never watches were he is walking." Rosalie said smirking at Emmett. I had to do a double take, her voice sounded like she was singing.

I saw Edward roll his eyes at the two of them. "So I never got to ask you if your day was good." Edward asked.

The first thing that came into my head was Jasper face but I wasn't going to say that. "It was the same as every other year but I didn't like being pushed." I saw Jasper tense up out of the corner of my eye.

"I wouldn't like being pushed ether." Emmett said more to him self than any one else.

I laughed. "I know most of the students here don't really have high IQ's but none of them are stupid enough to touch you!" I said as his smile grew. "Or Jasper for that matter." I thought of Jaspers body and almost let a smile come to my face, but I stopped my self. I heard Edward try to suppress a laugh as he looked at Jasper.

"I wouldn't count on it." Jasper said quietly. I looked at him but quickly looked down when I saw him looking at me. I figured he was right the people here would most likely would try to fight them, or just Jasper.

"Your probably right the people here are idiots." I said laughing as I thought of someone like Robert trying to pick a fight with Emmett.

"Why Joanna McCarty I haven't seen you in the longest time!" I flinched at the fake over sweet voice of Lulu Richards, my old best friend. Before she moved to Georgia after freshman year she told me how much of a freak I really was and that the only reason she was my friend was because she felt sorry for me. "Oh my lord you are still a freak!"

I knew she was trying to get me angry and I knew it was working. "Well bless your heart you're still a nasty little bitch!" I smiled at her but mentally cursed at my self for letting my accent come out. The Cullen's were all looking at Lulu with different expressions on their faces but Jasper was glaring at her, if looks could kill Lulu would be gone.

She turned to the Cullen's and winked at Jasper, I really have no idea why but that made my blood boil. "Is the freak bothering you?" she asked them smiling.

Jasper smirked and stood up standing next to me "Why yes you are!" he said nicely. "Now leave." his voice was now flat. I couldn't help but laugh as her smile faded and she ran off.

"That was good!" I said still laughing, as I turned to him he backed away so fast I gasped. It didn't even look like he had moved but he did. The other all looked on edge as well. I looked down, I must have done something stupid with out even knowing it. "I need to get to class." I said quietly as I ran to the bath room. This was my chance to make friends and I blew it some how. Did I really expect to make friends with them? I was nothing like them, so what if they were pretty much the only people who were nice to me, or at least nice to me yesterday.

"Hey Joanna?" I was surprised to hear Rosalie's voice. I stayed quiet in the stall hoping she would go away. "I know your in there." She had stopped in front of the stall I was in and stood there. "Why did you run off?" I wiped my eyes and walked out of the stall. Rosalie was leaning against the wall looking at me.

"I was bugging you, I'm sorry." I said quietly.

"Alice invited you, you weren't bugging us." she paused. "If you mean Jasper its just the way he is, always has been that way." I guessed I believed her on that part but they backed away as well.

"What about the rest of you?" I challenged. I was a little afraid of the answer but I still wanted to hear it.

"Well." she walked over to the sink and sat on it. "The others were watching for Jasper, you know making sure he was ok." she bit her lip. "I really wanted nothing to do with you." that hurt. "Its nothing you did, I just don't really get along with people. MY only friends are my family and they don't want any thing to do with me half the time." she said laughing a bit. She then eyed me. "Well it seems I could use a friend and I could say the same for you."

I nodded but I was confused none the less. " So you want us to be friends?" She smiled and nodded.

"That's exactly what I want." I couldn't believe that Rosalie Hale wanted to be my friend.

"I guess that would be ok." I said smiling a little. I tried to hide it but I was really happy, I hadn't had a real friend since the 8th grade.

"Good, now lets go back." She started to walk out of the bathroom but I didn't move. I didn't want o go back, I would look like an idiot.

"I'm not going back, I looked like an idiot. I'll just get to class." I walked out of the bathroom with Rosalie behind me. When the bell rang I looked at her. "Well I guess I don't even have time to go back."

"Yeah I guess not, well I will see you later." She said as she walked off. People were starting to fill the halls so I quickly made my way to class. When I got there Mrs. Heflin was not there but Alice, Bella and Edward were.

"Ohh Johanna!" Alice said in her hyper voice. I sighed and walked over to them, _Why do I have to be sitting by them now!_

"Hey Alice." I said quietly sitting down. Edward was looking at me strangely, it was like one of those 'I can't believe you said that' looks but he was trying to hide it.

"Are you ok now?" Alice asked smiling. I blushed and bit my lip of course they thought something was wrong with me. "I'm fine I was earlier, I just had to go to the bathroom." I said thinking fast. I hoped she would buy that and let it drop.

"Oh ok then." Alice said as more people filled the classroom. Robert looked at me and laughed as he entered. He walked over to my desk and bent down.

"Did you have a nice week of school, freak?" He asked smirking. I looked down as he smiled.

"Go away." I was surprised to hear Edward say. Robert looked at him for a minute then walked away.

"Thanks Edward" I said quietly. At first I wasn't sure he had heard me but he nodded and smiled, as Mrs. Heflin came into the room.

She smiled and sat down on her stool, she explained the assignment. We just had to write down the answers to what ever questions she had. When that was finished we had a few more minutes so I pulled out a picture I had been drawing for the whole weekend before, it was Rosalie, both of the ways I saw her. I was almost done with it I just needed to finish the shading on the second one.

"Is that suppose to be Rosalie?" Edward asked with a puzzled look on his face. I quickly hid it and blushed.

"N..no, why would you think that?" I said weakly.

"At the top it said Rosalie Hale." He pointed out, I blushed and put my head on my desk. "Why did you draw her like that?" _Oh because I see spirits and I see Rosalie like that! _I said in my mind making a note of how stupid it sounded. Edward looked at me surprised for a moment but hid it so fast I wasn't sure I even saw it. When the bell rang I was the first out of the room, not wanting to answer any questions.

The four periods before lunch were uneventful to say the least, we did review of things we learned last year which I already knew so it ticked me off. In Biology we were partnered up and I was paired up with Lulu. The whole class she left me to do the work and just kept asking what curse did I put on Jasper to make him stand up for me. I finally told her a better one than I was going to put on her if she didn't shut up. When lunch came I waited for Dominic with my try ready to go outside. Just as he walked up with his try Alice came up next to us.

"Where are you going?" she asked us smiling.

"Outside like always. That's where we eat." I said as it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Well not today! Today you are sitting with us!" Alice said walking behind Dominic and I pushing us towards the same table they were at this morning. I made a mental note that Alice was a lot stronger than she looked. The other were all doing there own thing before we arrived, Edward and Bella were working on a paper holding hands, Emmett and Rosalie were talking amongst them selves, Jasper was looking at the ceiling with his head resting on his hands. However as I took another step his eyes sot towards me. I took in a sharp breather as the others started looking at Dominic and I.

"You guys all know Johanna But this is her brother Dominic, I told them they could sit with us." Alice said sitting in a chair next to Jasper and another empty seat. Dominic sat next to Alice I and I just stood there, one seat was available it was next to Rosalie but across form Jasper.

"Aren't you going to sit down?" Rosalie asked smiling. I smiled weakly and sat down in the open chair.

"Wow you and him really do look alike!" Emmett said looking from Dominic to me.

"That's because they're twins you idiot!" Emmett smiled at Rosalie who rolled her eyes. I couldn't help but smile, Emmett just seemed to make me.

"So were you born here or did you move here?" Rosalie asked.

"We were born here, you'd have to be crazy to move here." I then remembered they moved here. "No offence." I said quickly. I saw Jasper smile out of the corner of my eye.

"No I agree, we are crazy." Emmett said seriously. "Mostly Jasper, he is really a nut job." Emmett sounded so convincing that I had to look at Jasper, who was glaring at Emmett.

"Shut up." Jasper said kicking Emmett's chair. I looked at where my chair was and where Jaspers was, they were at the same spot only his was away from the table more. Then I tried to kick Emmett's chair but my leg didn't go part Rosalie's.

I heard Edward laugh. "What are you trying to do?" he asked me. I looked around every one was looking at me, even Dominic.

I let out a nervous laugh. "I'm not as tall as Jasper." I said looking down. Emmett let out a booming laugh causing several people to look our way.

"Your like the same height as Alice!" Alice and I both glared at him.

"Well that's because short people are awesome people!" I said smiling, letting my true self show.

"Yeah, we are!" Alice said smiling. Dominic rolled his eyes but smiled none the less, he was used to the short people rock thing by now.

"So where do your parents work?" Rosalie asked smiling but when she saw the look on Dominic and I's faces she stopped. I wasn't really ready for that question, even though no one really liked Dominic and I they never said anything about our father. It wasn't that I was ashamed of him in fact I was proud, but he has been scheduled to visit twice after he left, he hasn't been home once. Then a strange feeling of security and comfort filled me.

"My mom works at the hospital, she works in the ER. My father is a solider, he is in Iraqi now I think." I saw them nod.

"Oh Carlisle works at the hospital to! Maybe your mom knows him!" Alice said smiling.

My mom did know him but Dominic answered before I could. "Yeah, she does."

I ate my lunch and talked in between bites, the whole time I felt eyes on me and I soon figured out it was Jasper. The strangest thing was when ever I would feel uncomfortable it would be washed away immediately. When the bell rang I stood up and stretched before I grabbed my things.

"What class do you have next?" Rosalie asked as she stood next to Emmett.

"The art teacher just started today, so I'm going there." I said rolling my eyes. I had signed up for art but the previous week the teacher was gone so all art students were placed in different classrooms.

"I have art as well." The person hadn't spoke this whole time but I knew it was Jasper. All of the Cullen's looked at him then at Alice who shook her head no smiling, but once again this happened so fast I wasn't sure what I saw.

"We should get to class." Rosalie said hesitantly walking off with Emmett. I waved to Rosalie then to Dominic.

"Jasper I want to talk to you right quick." Edward said as Jasper walked with him and Bella out of the cafeteria.

I had no intentions on being late so I hurried off to art class. When I arrived there were not very many others in the class and the table in the back was open. I looked around the room as I sat down, there were many different colors around the room, the table were round with baskets of drawing utensils in the middle of the table. As students entered the room none of them sat by me or any where near me for that matter. Right before the bell rang Jasper walked in but it wasn't the same one from earlier, he was in an old Confederate uniform, and the patches show he was a major. Then I saw the truly most terrifying thing I had ever seen, he had blood red crazy eyes, he was covered in blood, his teeth were barred and he looked even more savage then when I first saw him. I screamed causing every one to look at me, except for Jasper who was frozen on the spot, did he think I was screaming because of him?

"Are you ok?" The teacher asked walking over to me. I looked away from Jasper and at her. I couldn't speak so I simply nodded.

Jasper walked in and sat at the table next to mine his head down the whole time. The teacher went up to the front and told us our assignment, to draw the last thing that was stuck in your mind, I thought about what made me scream but I decided to draw Jasper in the uniform. When we got to work I could hear people whispering about me "She is such a freak." "Just when you thought she couldn't get any more freakish." "I can't believe she did that!" "Just because she sees a hot guy she freaks out." "I feel sorry for him, he has to sit by her." I tried to ignore it but it never seemed to stop. As the bell rang I hurried to my next class not saying a word. The rest of the day went like this, even in history I sat in the back not talking to any one. Being made fun of never affected me like this, I guess it was starting to hurt. I had never been physically picked on before and this year I had been.

On the way home Dominic kept asking what was wrong but I never answered him, which I hated. I told Dominic every thing, but I hadn't told him this about how it was starting to get to me, but I guess he knew. When dinner came I did nothing but smile like a good little girl not saying a word. Dominic followed me upstairs after dinner.

"Tell me what's wrong Joanna!" He said coming into my room. "You know you can tell me anything." I looked at him, he was right.

"Things are just starting to bug me." I said resting my head on my knees.

Dominic looked at me carefully. "Did you really scream when Jasper walked into the room?" I knew every one in the school would know. I nodded as he moved closer to me. "Was it because of the spirits you see?" he asked. He was the only one who knew, my mother would have me committed if she knew, and my father, I guess I never thought about how he would react.

"Not exactly, I see the Cullen's and Hales differently, well not Bella's but the others I do." I said thinking of the ways I saw them.

"What do you mean?" I bit my lip.

"I don't know its complicated, its like I see them but dressed differently its really them. Like I see them two ways, one they are normal but dressed form the old times, and the other way I see them, its like they are dead, dying…" I though of a way to describe how I saw Jasper the second time. "Or like a monster."

Dominic hugged me and told me that it would be ok. Dominic was the first to fall asleep, while I sat there and looked at the wall until I slowly drifted to sleep.

_**SO? How was it? **_


	4. Emotions

_**Sorry about all the kipping around, but this is Jasper. He can hardly stand being with humans as it is, so if you don't like the skipping around just think of it that way. I would also like to give a big thanks to **__**Superdani, she has commented on every chapter of this story and I published my 3**__**rd**__** chapter because she asked. **_

For the next few days went that same as Monday, Dominic and I meet the Cullen's in the morning, but Jasper stayed as far away as possible not talking, We ate lunch with them, but Jasper did the same thing he did in the mornings, If I saw him in the hall with one of his siblings he would leave, During art he never looked at me once. I don't know why this bugged me, I really never care if someone ignored me before but for some reason when Jasper did it I didn't like it. Once I thought it might have been because I screamed at him and maybe that hurt him, and that was part of it but what made it worse was I really liked him. I don't know why but it was just something about him that just made me like him.

Another thing that got me was the people making fun of me, not that they were doing it or anything but what happened when it started getting to me. When I would get upset I would feel happy or calm for some reason, no matter what was being said I couldn't feel upset for more than a second. I started realizing that when my mood changed Jasper was some where in the room or in sight, but that was just a coincidence, a lot of people where around me.

This morning was different than others in many ways. First my mother was home and had breakfast waiting for us, she was all smiles and full of conversation. The ride to school was enjoyable as well, the sky was still cloudy but it was a nice day none the less. I actually felt good going to school, I know weird right, but I really did. When we got to school Rosalie, Alice, and Bella were waiting for us.

"Hello!" Alice was always the first one to speak, it was like she wouldn't allow anyone else to talk first.

"Hey Alice." Dominic said smiling, Rosalie and I laughed as his face grew red. Dominic had the most obvious crush on Alice and she didn't see it or didn't mind it.

"Ok we are going to go now." Rosalie said pulling on my arm leading me away. She led me to an empty classroom and sat on a desk. "So why did you scream when you saw Jasper?" I bit my lip and sighed. I knew some one would ask me this and Rosalie was his twin so why not her.

"Its complicated, but I didn't scream because of him." She looked at me confused.

"What did you scream at then?" she asked clearly not believing me. I didn't want to tell her every thing so I told her a little bit of it.

"I saw something, that's it ok." I said a bit rude. Now she looked interested rather than unbelieving.

"What did you see?" I wasn't going to even conceder telling her that.

"Its was just something ok, that's it." I knew I had gotten to defensive when I said that.

"Your lying what did you see. I'm your friend you can tell me." I ran my fingers through my hair and my heart started beating fast, I was getting worked up. "Just tell me what you saw." her kind voice pushed me over for some reason.

"Ok you want to know what I saw!" I said loudly, she looked taken aback as I continued. "I saw Jasper In a Civil war uniform with blood red eyes covered in blood as well. He looked like a monster, ok that's why I screamed. Are you happy to know I'm a freak!" As I finished the bell rang. Rosalie did the strangest thing and hugged me.

"Its ok I don't think you are a freak!" she said, her eyes were sincere and I believed her, but I never got to tell her because I closed my eyes and when I opened them she was gone.

I didn't know that I had started crying until I wiped my face off unconsciously. (A.N: **Yeah I know she is very emotional!!**) For first period the Alice, Edward, and Bella weren't in class and I didn't see them until lunch but when I saw them I hurried outside and ate. I didn't want to be any where near Rosalie now, I knew she believed me but I didn't want any questions. The main thing that was going though my mind was why did she believe me? What would make her just believe something like that? When the bell rang for art class my heart imminently sank, ever since the first day of art class I had become the main topic of discussion or at least they remembered to say a hurtful comment loud enough for me to hear. I grabbed my things and headed to Art Class. I wasn't the first person there but not the last ether, but the teacher wasn't in the room. (man this school needs a better staff!) A boy named Lucas sat next to me while his friend Michel sat at here table and laughed.

"Hello Joanna." he said smirking. I didn't answer him I just looked away. "Your suppose to look at someone when they are talking to you!" I knew he was mad by the tone of his voice. Lucas was the kind of guy that girls were never suppose to be able to resist. "Look at me!" he hissed grabbing my wrist so hard I thought it was going to break. I looked at him with wide eyes and tried to pull my wrist away but his grip only tightened. Now I was afraid.

"Let go of her." Lucas's grip loosened at the sound of Jasper Hale's voice. I looked up at him and he looked angry to say the least. "Let her go and get out of my seat." He said glaring at Lucas. Wait… did he say his seat? When Lucas moved away Jasper sat in the same spot, I guess he did say his seat. Jasper had his chair a good distance away from mine but his eyes stayed on my wrist I was now rubbing. "Are you ok?" he asked. I was froze, this was the first time he had spoken to me directly.

"Uh yeah I guess so, it just hurts." I said quietly, not looking at him.

"He had no right to do that!" Jasper's voice was full of anger when he spoke. I looked at him and he was glairing at Lucas.

"Its really ok, see no harm." I said holding my wrist out. He looked at it and nodded, I knew I would have a bruise but not now I wouldn't.

"Hello class, I know you are all with the drawing I had you draw the first day, or you better be. Why you may ask well because I am making you all show them to the class." I felt my heart drop to the bottom, I couldn't show my picture it was Jasper! As people showed there pictures people clapped and so on until Jasper and I were left. Mrs. Jenkins looked at both of us waiting for one of us to go, but nether of us got up. "Ok you two seem to be shy so I am going to let you show them together now get up here." Both of us stood up and walked to the front and stood there. "Now show them!" She said smiling. I swallowed hard and saw him turning his so I did the same. When they were both over the whole class was laughing and I wanted to die. I heard Mrs. Jenkins walk to the front to see them and laughed. "Well, it seems you two have been on each others minds!" I opened my eyes and looked at his picture, it was me in an old time dress. I was shocked I looked up at him and he was looking at my picture with some expression I couldn't read. As the bell rang I hurried out of the class but Jasper stopped me.

"Why did you draw me like that?" He asked looking down at me, I looked up at him and saw how his eyes got darker the closer he was to me.

I didn't know how to answer. "I watched a special on the Civil War before I came to school." I said looking down. I felt my face grow red as he didn't speak, I turned my head a little to look up at him and his eyes where now pitch black and he didn't look like he was breathing. "Jasper?" I felt my self growing fearful but then a wave of calmness and welcome ness filled me. He looked in pain, not as bad as the first time I met him but he looked close. His jaw started moving, it looked like his mouth wanted to open but he wouldn't let it. I didn't know what to do, no one ever prepared you for this situation. He leaned closer to and he was about to let his mouth open when out of no where Emmett and Edward pulled him back.

"Get to class." Emmett directed as he held his hand on Jaspers chest pushing him back. I looked at Jasper one least time, his eyes were still black but he looked like he was going to cry. I looked at the three of them then hurried to class. As I did so I felt the calmness and openness go away. I guess I took to long in the hall with Jasper because I was late to class, for the first time ever.

What was happening with Jasper? The only time I had ever seen something like that was in one of those old vampire movies, but his was real life and Jasper wasn't a vampire. That last thought played over in my mind over and over again, vampires. I had made two lists in my head, it was stupid but I did none the less. Ways they were like Vampires: 1. They all had pale skin 2. They were not related but they had the same eye color and the purple under there eyes. 3. They walked so quietly. 4. No human could look like they did. 5. They seemed to be able to charm anyone 6. What just happened was not normal! 7. Jasper's eyes changed form gold to black when ever I was around. Ways they weren't like vampires: 1. They were clearly out during the day. 2. No fangs. 3. All vampires in movies had Red or blue eyes. 4. VAMPIRES AREN'T REAL!! Okay so there were more ways they were like them then not, but the last reason of my not list was most important.

"What are you thinking about so hard? Your going to hurt yourself." Dominic's voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

I pushed him lightly but still hard enough to push him through the door way into History class. "I can think of what ever I want, and at least I can think to hard. You can't because you don't have a brain!" I said smiling, it was fun to joke around with Dominic.

"Nether of you have a brain now stop pushing him in my doorway." he paused "Get further into the room." Dominic looked at him and I laughed as we walked to our desks.

I sat my things down on top of Dominic's desk and sat on top of mine. The room was hotter than the hall way so I pulled my sleeves up, but winced as I pulled the left one up. I looked at my wrist and I was right, a dark purple bruise was on my wrist. "Where the hell did you get that?" Dominic asked looking at my writs.

I pulled my sleeve down, "Its nothing." I said quietly. "Whatever!" He hissed. "Tell me how you got that!" Dominic was not the strongest person but he would fight if I was in trouble. Like in 8th grade some high school guy was picking on me and Dominic got in to a fight with him and got beat up, this happened a lot when we were younger also.

"It was Lucas, but Jasper took care of it!" I said loud enough for only him to hear.

"Lucas did that to you! Why!" Dominic asked grabbing his hair. (This was a habit he had when he to mad or upset.)

"Because he is a jerk, but like I said Jasper took care of it." I didn't want Dominic to get into a fight so I tried to make it better.

Dominic was about to say something when Alice sat next to him. "Hey guys."

"Hey Alice." I said smiling brightly. Not looking at Dominic who was still waiting for a better explanation.

"Hey." Dominic said finally turning away from me. I could tell he was still angry but he was trying to hide it.

"What are you talking about?" She asked, something however told me she already knew, maybe she had great vampire hearing. Okay now I was going over board, they are not vampires!

"Oh just random things." Dominic said quickly. Alice nodded but didn't say anything because Mr. Woods was sitting on his stool waiting for us to quiet down. When the class got quiet he began talking about the conquistadors and things on the subject. During class Dominic slid a piece of paper at me. I opened it. '_Why would Lucas do that, and I don't want because he is a jerk.'_ I rolled my eyes and wrote '_Its nothing, I mean I don't even know why, I guess it was because I wasn't looking at him.' _I passed the note carefully back to Dominic. As he read it I could tell he was getting angrier. _'He did it just because he wouldn't look at you!! How…' _I didn't get to read the rest of the letter because Mr. Woods grabbed it. He was smiling when he did so but as he read it his smile disappeared. Then he looked at me then at Dominic and went back to his lesson. Alice looked at me and once again I saw the girl in the straightjacket, when it flashed back Alice looking at my arm. I looked down and saw they my sleeve was coming up and she could see the bruise. Quickly I pulled my sleeve down. When the bell rang I stood up with Dominic ready to head home.

"Joanna, Dominic come here." Mr. Woods said, I knew he was going to ask what happened. I grabbed Dominic's hand and we walked over to his desk. He looked at both of us the at the note. "What are you two talking about here?" he asked. Most of the time he was smiling and joking but now he was dead serious.

"Its nothing really." Dominic said squeezing my hand.

Mr. Woods shook his head. "Its not nothing, I can tell that much. Now what is this note about?" I looked at my wrist then pulled up my sleeve, I raised my arm up and showed him. "Lucas Johnson did this to you?" I couldn't speak so I just nodded. "Well get home, I will deal with this."

Dominic pulled me out of the classroom and out to our truck. On the way home we decided not to tell our mother about it or talk about it any more. Once we pulled up my mom was dressed in her work clothes and had her bag with her. "I'm so sorry guys I have to get to work. You will have to get something for supper." She kissed us both on the forehead then drove off.

"I want chicken daddy!" I said like a little kid looking up at Dominic. He laughed and rolled his eyes.

"Psh you lucky I'm not your daddy! You would be in an orphanage!" He yelled laughing wildly. I laughed with him but I made mine a little over done….. Okay a lot over done.

"You can't be my daddy! Your only five minutes older than me!" I whined. Dominic grabbed my face.

"Does that make us twins?" He asked shocked. I put my hand over my mouth

"Lets go see if we look the same!" I yelled pulling him into the house. We both stood in front of the mirror looking at our own reflections then each others.

"We do!" the two of us yelled in unison.

"Wow how am I twins with a midget!" Dominic asked smiling.

I looked up at him in awe. "Wow , I get to be related to you!" I started jumping up and down. "I am related to the only person living with out a brain!" I put my hands over my mouth and smiled as I skipped off to my room laughing as I went.

After that little bit of fun Dominic and I decided we would just have cereal for dinner. We sat down on the couch and turned on the T.V. My jaw nearly hit the floor when I saw that Interview with a vampire was on. I hated T.V for the first time in my life at that second, I had just forgot about the vampire Cullen's thing and now this movie was on.

"I hate T.V" Dominic said throwing his plastic spoon at the T.V.

I looked at him curiously. "Why do you hate T.V?"

He didn't answer, he just looked around. "No its stupid." He shook his head.

That forced me to ask. "Does it have anything to do with the Cullen's?" He looked at me mouth agape. I was right. We went over ways we thought they were vampires as well as ways they couldn't have been. He gave me new ways of how they were like them He said that right after my art period he saw Edward and Emmett with Alice, Rosalie, and Bella but when he blinked Edward and Emmett were gone and the girls had worried looks on there faces.

"That's when the weird thing with Jasper happened and Emmett and Edward just appeared!" I said, that really got things going in my head, how did they do that?

"I have an idea!" Dominic said. I nodded telling him to go on. "We should keep note in our heads of course, of things they do that make them seem like vampires." I nodded but then thought back to Edward's facial expressions when I thought something's, maybe he could read minds? _Okay that's just stupid! Edward cant read minds. _I told myself, after we decided on it we looked at the clock and it was 12 o'clock.

"I'm going to bed." I said standing up, he nodded and did the same.

When I got to my room I laid down but couldn't get to sleep. What had happened during and after art class kept playing over in my mind. Why would Jasper draw me as the thing stuck on his mind? I mean I knew I wasn't someone you would easily forget but he drew me beautifully not like I was now but like I would have been in the 1800's or something. Then after class, I shuddered at the thought, what was going on then I didn't feel afraid then but now I know I should have been. Why weren't my emotions working right?!

_**Ok there you go chapter four! I know this one is a bit different and if you think things are going to fast tell me, but they don't find out the secrete for a while, just to let you know!**_


	5. Party and a dream

_**Ok here is the next chapter, and the only reason I am updating is because Superdani always leaves a comment and is a really awesome reader, but I would love for some one else to leave a comment on it as well. Even if you don't like it, please tell me what's wrong with it! And my cousin read it and said it would be fun to read the chapter Emotions in Jasper's prospective, so tell me if that's something you would like to read. Oh yeah this chap. has more of Jasper and Joanna together! **_

That night I woke up with the strange feeling someone was watching me. I looked around my room but nothing was there, I stood up and looked out the window and for a second I thought I saw a pair of golden eyes but in flash they were gone. I stared at the spot they had been for a good three minutes before I was able to move, when I first saw those eyes I thought of Jasper, but his eyes were never that light. When I was finally calm enough to lay back down I still couldn't go back to sleep. This school year had been so strange already, how was it going to end?

I don't actually remember falling asleep but I knew I had when Dominic ran into the room and jumped on me. "Wake up my dearest twin sister it is Saturday!" He yelled in a sing song voice. I tried to push him off of me but I couldn't, my excuse is it was to early in the morning to have muscles. After I gave up on pushing him off me I looked at the clock next to my bed…… 8:27.

"Dominic McCarty why did you wake me up at 8:27!" I yelled pulling his hair.

He shook away from me and looked at the clock. "Its not 8:27 its 8:28, and mom told me to get you up! She is having one of those party things she throws for the staff of the hospital." I rolled my eyes. My mother threw a staff party any time she felt like we needed friends or she needed company, so we had them a lot.

"Why is she doing it this time?" I asked sitting up.

"Its kind of a welcoming party for Dr. Cullen." I looked at him, Dr. Cullen was Jaspers adopted father meaning Jasper would be here. My first emotion was a bit of panic, what would happen because of yesterday. The next was excited, I would be able to see Jasper and its my house so I could go where I wanted! "Get out I need to get dressed." I said pushing him out of my room. Once I closed my door I went to my closet and looked for an outfit. I picked out a Hatsaharu from Fruits Basket t- shirt and a pair of lime green skinny jeans, I layered a few belts and a pair of suspenders. I put on my necklaces and bracelets, then did my make up. Dominic came in when I was doing my hair.

"How do you do that?" he asked, I put my comb down and grabbed the hair spray.

"Its called teasing." I said spraying my hair making sure it was shaped right. Dominic stood up as I did, we walked into the kitchen where my mother was cooking. She always cooked a lot for these things, and at times cooked to much.

"Hey mom." I said sitting down at the table looking at all of the chocolate treats she made. "Aww all this for me?" I asked smiling.

"No you chocolate fiend!" Dominic yelled hitting me in the head with a wooden spoon. I rubbed my head with one hand and tried to hit him with the other.

"That hurt you jerk!" I yelled, my mom took the spoon from Dominic and sat it back on the counter.

"Dominic don't do that again, and no they are not all for you Joanna. And if you touch any of them I will skin you alive!" I looked up at her then to a chocolate cake that was next to me. I held out my finger as if I was going to get some of the frosting when my mom smacked me in the hand with the same wooden spoon Dominic had hit me with.

"Ok, ok I won't touch them!" I said looking down and I licked my hand. This was something I I did when I got hurt I licked my wounds, yes like an animal! My mom told us to start setting up outside and we didn't want to get in trouble so we did. First we got the tables put where they always went, but we did have a few problems with that. I couldn't lift it as high as Dominic could and when we got the biggest one put down it was on Dominic's foot. We put up the streamers and set up the radio (my mom went all out with these things) . By the time we were finished setting up it was 11: 24, we walked in side only to be given plates of food.

"This thing starts at 12:45 so hurry up and get these out there." I looked at her that was only six minutes! I did as I was told though and put things out, as I carried out the last dish our first guest arrived….. It was Lulu. I had forgotten that her grandmother worked as receptionist at the hospital.

"Oh what a joy." Dominic said sarcastically as we sat down the plates of food.

"Joanna!" Lulu yelled smiling. "I am so glad that we can be best friends again!" she hugged me and I almost threw up. I saw her grandmother smile and knew what she was doing, she was trying to make it look like we were friends and that she was still an angel….. I could stop that. When her grandmother walked inside to see my mom she let go of me and looked sick.

"Nice act." I said flatly as Dominic walked over to me. "Now why on earth would you come here?" I asked her sitting on top of one of the tables.

She smiled and laughed. "Because I know that Jaspers father is a doctor and he will be here." I almost feel off the table.

"You like Jasper!" I yelled, a part of me wanted to laugh, another wanted to throw up, and a small part of me was worried. I didn't have very many crushes which has been two including this one, but my last crush Lulu decided to make her boyfriend for four months, and I didn't want that happening with Jasper. I almost busted out laughing at that thought, Jasper with me! Now that was a stupid thought.

"Like he would like you." Dominic said smiling. "Alice told me he liked someone." I looked up at him then back down, of course he liked someone, he could get any one he wanted.

"How do you know it wasn't me?" she said smiling even bigger.

"Because she said it wasn't the Devil." I started laughing and Dominic tried to keep a straight face. Lulu was about to say something when more cars started pulling up and my mom and her grandmother came out.

"Oh hello Lulu, Joanna never told me you were back!" my mom said as she hugged Lulu.

"What! Joanna how could you, aint I your best friend?" she asked.

I looked at her incredulously. "No." I said looking at her like she was crazy.

My mother looked at me like I was stupid, she walked over to me. "Be nice to our guests." she hissed as more people showed up.

Dominic and I walked to the table hidden most in the trees and sat on top of it. Most of the people who would be here where, but the Cullen's weren't. I sat with my arms on my knees while I rested my head on my arms, would Jasper really fall for Lulu? I didn't want to think about the answer if it was yes, I didn't think Jasper liked anyone, but Dominic said Alice told him he did and Alice and Jasper are so close I thought they were dating at first.

"What's wrong Joanna?" I heard Dominic ask. I just shook my head to signal nothing. "Liar, I know you better than any one else in the world. What's wrong?" I didn't say anything. "You like Jasper don't you!" he whispered. I looked up at him surprised.

"Well you like Alice!" I hissed in defense, Dominic laughed.

"I know that and I'm sure she knows to." I looked up at him, he was right. He may have tried to hide the fact that he liked Alice but failed miserably.

"You can't tell anyone!" I hissed as I grabbed his hair and pulled. I knew he hated it when people messed with his hair and that it would get me what I wanted.

"Okay, okay just let go of my hair!" He yelled as I let go. He did his best to fix his hair without a mirror.

"Dr. Cullen for a moment I thought you went going to come!" I heard my mother say. I looked up and my mom was talking to a very young doctor, with pale skin, blond hair , golden eyes, and the bruise like markings, and the first thing that came to mind when I saw him was DAMN! I mean it to, he was the best looking guy ever! (Or at least best looking after Jasper.) With him was a beautiful woman, she wasn't very tall, with a round face and caramel colored hair, her skin was pale, and her eyes were like the other Cullen's. I looked around to see if I could se any of the others and the first one I saw was Alice. Not because she stood out, but because she was right in front of me.

"Hello Joanna!" Alice said smiling. It took a minute to calm my breathing but once I had my heart working right I answered her.

"Hey." I said smiling at her as I saw Rosalie, Emmett, Bella, Edward, and Jasper all in different places behind her. When I looked at Jasper I heard Dominic laugh and I shot him a glare, causing him to shut up.

"Wow Carlisle told us about thins thing a little while ago but we didn't want to come until he told us that it was your mom throwing the party." Alice said laughing for no apparent reason.

"I still don't want to be here!" Emmett said smiling. Rosalie smacked him on the arm and he smiled down at her.

"Emmett that was rude!" Rosalie shook her head and walked away from him. I tried not to but I couldn't stop my self from looking at Jasper, he was never looking at me, mostly he just looked at the ground. I sighed and for some reason and I felt upset, I don't know why the fact that he wouldn't look at me made me upset but it did. Then just like at school a warm bubbly feeling came through me, for some reason I looked at Jasper. He was looking at me and his eyes were

Dark again, they weren't black but way to close._ It has to be him! _I thought to myself. I saw Edward's eyes flash to me then to Jasper. I looked at Edward but Jasper's eyes never left me.

"Let's go find Carlisle and Esme. "Edward said quickly. Emmett nodded and waited for Jasper who didn't move.

"Come on Jasper." Emmett and Edward both placed a hand on his shoulder and pulled a little. After a minute Jasper turned around and went with them.

"Okay, does he always act weird like that?" Dominic asked. I glared at him but Rosalie nodded.

"Here recently, yeah he dose." Rosalie was looking at me, Alice was shaking her head, Bella

Was looking at the spot Edward was, Dominic was looking at Alice and I was in Wonderland.

Rosalie, Alice, Dominic and I stayed at the same table for most of the afternoon only leaving to go to the bathroom or what ever Alice and Rosalie had to do. Dominic and I taught the girls a few scene fraises like what it means to say that guy is the sex and such. During the lunch thing nether Alice, Rosalie, or Bella touched there food, they said they had ate before they got here but they never ate. I reminded myself to talk to Dominic about that later. When it started to get dark I realized I hadn't had this much fun since my cousins visited from Galveston last summer. When my mom put some music on the first some she picked her C.D of George straight.

"Edward!" Bella said standing up and walking to him. I looked up and saw Edward, Emmett and Jasper. Jasper's eyes were lighter than I had even seen them, they weren't as gold as the others but pretty damn close. Edward wrapped his arms around Bella and I felt a sting of jealousy, it wasn't because she had Edward because I didn't really find him all that attractive, but because she had some one who it seemed would die for her.

"Hello." he kissed the top of her head and smiled. Emmett had walked over to Rosalie and myself and put his arm over Rosalie's shoulder as she tip toed and he bent down slightly so she cold kiss his cheek. Dominic and Alice were talking like they had been for a long time, the only thing they did was Alice waved at Jasper.

I felt like I was intruding on all of them so I decided to go get a glass of water and hope that when I got back the love fest would be over. I don't think anyone even saw me leave, they were to wrapped up in there own worlds. Once I got my water bottle out of the refrigerator I walked to the front door when something caught my eye. I felt my heart fall as I picked it up and walked out onto the front porch. I sat down on the step holding the desert camouflaged helmet. The fabric on top had a few rips in it so you could now see some of the metal plating under it, I ran my hand over it thinking of my father. I didn't relies my mother had changed C.D' s until the worst possible song that could have came on did, Avril Lavigne When you're Gone. I couldn't stop it, I felt one tear after another roll down my cheeks.

"You miss him." A very enchanting, sincere voice said. I looked at him confused for a moment, why did he care? He walked up the steps and set down next to me, as far away as he could on the steps but still next to me.

"He hasn't been back, twice he was suppose to but he hasn't." I don't know why I told him that, Jasper just had this charisma that made it seem ok to open up to him.

"Do you think something bad happened to him?" he asked quietly, I knew he wasn't opening his mouth very much simply from the way he was talking.

I didn't want to say it, I did but never had I said it out loud to any one, not even Dominic. "Wouldn't you?" I asked quietly, I wasn't sure that he had heard me but he nodded and seemed deep in thought.

"I'm sure he is fine." he said looking at the people. "War is madness, you never know what's going to happen the next day. You can be set to go home one minute then n the middle of a battle the next." he seemed to be speaking from experience, like he had dealt with it before. Though I knew he hadn't it felt nice to pretend he had. "I'm sure your dad would have given anything to come back to you, and I know your always on his mind, along with you mother and brother." When he was finished I felt like a little kid. It was like I was talking to one of my elders and I was just told something with so much more meaning than it appeared to have.

I felt myself smile even though I was still sad. "Thanks Jasper." I said wiping my face then looking at him. He was smiling and seemed very pleased with himself, I had come to think the darker his eyes, the worse the mood , yet his eyes were a dark gold, ochre I would say, and he was in what seemed to be a very pleasant mood. This was also the most he had ever said to me and the nicest he had ever been. I then thought about the picture he drew of me in art and was going to ask about it but I didn't want what happened last time to happen.

He looked down and suddenly his expression changed to anger. I followed his gaze down to my bruised wrist. I tried to cover it but I knew he had seen it so I stopped my self and just looked down. " I thought it didn't leave a mark!" he said through gritted teeth.

"I don't bruise right away, it takes a little while." I didn't want to look up a him. I could since he was angry over it, I could feel his eyes still on my wrist.

"You should have told me!" he said moving his honey blond hair out of his eyes.

The first thing that came to my mind was, _After what happened after class I was going no where near you! _But I didn't want him to stop talking to me, then it hit me. The only reason he was mad was because he cared. "I didn't want you to be mad like you are now." I said quietly. I looked at him from the corner of my eyes and he had a shocked look on his face.

"I'm not mad at you." I said talking a deep breath, it was like he was struggling with something and I felt like it was my fault, I was making him feel bad or something. "I'm not mad at you now, I've never been mad at you. Only myself." I looked at him confused, why was he mad at himself and why did he say now? Had he been mad at me before?

"I don't get what you mean." I said looking at him.

He smirked. "That's not a bad thing." I really was confused now. I heard him laugh and it was more musical than Alice's, it was even more enchanting than his voice.

"Ok." I said looking at him, for some reason I wanted to laugh but I tried to stop myself. "That's good?" I asked laughing a bit. I had put the helmet down when the song ended a while ago. I looked around and saw the other all at the same table we had previously been at.

"Oh hi Jasper!" my mouth fell open as Lulu came over. _I am going to kill her! Why did she have to ruin this! _

"Oh hi umm…" Jasper looked like he was thinking about her name, I couldn't help but snicker a bit.

However Lulu only seemed angry for a minute before she faked smiled once again. "Its Lulu silly!" she said sitting in between us. Jasper made no efforts to get her to move only smiling slightly and apologized for forgetting her name. I laughed on the inside and felt tears pricking the back of my eyes. " Its ok, your new here. I'm sure you'll get to know all about me sometime." She said winking. _Wow she is a slut! _Jasper let out a laugh but it wasn't like the one he gave me.

"Well that's nice but I f you couldn't tell I was having a conversation with Joanna and I would highly appreciate it if you would leave." Lulu looked surprised, but I'm sure I looked even more surprised.

"Oh that's it Jasper Hale I want nothing to do with you!" she said as she stormed off. I looked at Jasper who rolled his eyes.

"She doesn't mean that." He said shaking his head. " Come Monday she will be back to never leaving me alone." I laughed.

"Your going to have to shoot her and make her bleed to death, then call it self defense." He looked at me seriously for a moment then laughed a little, he made it seem really convincing but I knew he was faking.

"Jasper its time to go." the woman I presumed to be Esme said as Carlisle and herself walked towards us with the other Cullen's and Dominic. "Oh hello I am Esme." she said smiling at me. Instantly I felt warm just by her smile.

"Dr. Carlisle Cullen." I nodded at him as Jasper stood up and I did the same. I looked back at Esme just as with the rest of her family saw her in different clothes. She first had an old style dress on she was smiling yet you could faintly see a bruise on her face. The next way I saw her was unreadable, she had bones that were clearly broken and was bleeding a few places. I didn't say anything or do anything but Edward was looking at me, I turned away from her hoping to see a normal spirit of any but I turned to face Carlisle, Now he was wearing old clothes, from the 16 or 1700's. Then he changed, he had the red eyes like Jasper did when I saw him that time but they were different, scared and afraid not savage.

"Well Joanna it was nice talking to you." Jasper said bowing slightly. I nodded and held in a laugh, people usually didn't bow any more. I saw him smile a bit as well.

"Yeah it was nice talking to you to." I said smiling warmly.

"See you Monday." Rosalie said smiling as Alice came up to me.

"Let me see your cell phone." She said smiling. I reached into my pocket and handed it to her. She typed something in, which I think was her number but it was to fast. "There is my number, I will text you later and save my number when you get it!" She said skipping to Jasper's side. Jasper smiled at me sending another one of those wacky moods to me, but this was a happy one so I didn't care. They said goodbye to my mother then left.

"Did you two have fun?" my mother asked us as she began taking the dishes into the house. I wanted to scream that it was the best day but knowing my mom she would say it had something to do with Jasper, and it was all to do with Jasper but I didn't want her to know.

"I did." Dominic said smiling, most likely thinking of Alice.

"Oh yeah it was ok I guess, better than the others." I said shrugging trying to pass it off as no big deal. Dominic looked at me trying to hold in a laugh, he seemed to think my lie was funny.

"Well you seemed o begetting along with Jasper pretty well." I looked at her , what was she getting at. "You know he is a very nice boy, and highly attractive." I looked at her wide eyes.

"Mom don't even think about it!" I thought for a moment. "And please stop checking him out, he is in high school!" I said as my mother looked at me and laughed.

"Oh no I was not checking him out for me, I was doing it for you honey." That made me sick. "You've never had a boyfriend before and he seems to kinda like you."

"Oh mother please Jasper doesn't like me! We have art together so he is trying to be nice to me because everyone else picks on me." oops.

She looked at me and stood up straight. "Honey who's been making fun of you?" She asked. I looked at Dominic who was looking down, we had never told our mother about being made fun of. So much for the best day ever.

"No one mom." I said shaking my head not looking her in the eyes.

"You just told me someone did!" She looked over at Dominic for an answer but saw his face. "Its happening to you to?" he didn't say anything only nodded. "Why didn't you tell me before?" she asked.

"You wouldn't have believed us!" I yelled. "I told you earlier that Lulu wasn't my friend and you got mad at me!" I yelled as a stormed out of the house. It was dark now and it was quiet, I knew my mom wouldn't come after me, she would send Dominic. I didn't mid her doing that, if I saw her I would most likely not listen. I stopped when I got to the edge of the forest around my house, it was dark all around me the only light was the dim light of my house and the moon and stars.

"Why are you out here?" my head shot up at the sound of Jaspers voice.

"Better question what are you doing here?" I asked a bit rudely or a lot to tell the truth. He looked a little taken back by my attitude but as he spoke I calmed down. "I left my phone with Alice and she left it here." he said holding out his phone. I nodded and looked back at my house. "Why are you mad?" he asked he.

I looked at him, "Who says I'm mad?" I snapped.

He raised an eye brow, and looked at me. "Its kind of obvious you are." he said, his tone gave he a thought that he didn't think to highly of my intelligence but I let it go. I looked up at him then slid down the tree, sitting on the cold ground.

"My mother is oblivious." I said pulling grass out of the ground. I didn't hear Jasper move but when I looked over he was sitting across from me. "She had no idea that Dominic and I go through hell every day!" I said as I felt my anger rising. My heart was beating faster and I grinded my teeth, I couldn't help that, these were my habits when I got mad. I saw Jasper tilt his head slightly as a wave of calmness came through me.

"If you don't have good communication with you mother she won't be able to tell when something is wrong. I'm sure she had a feeling that something was wrong but you never let her know." He said calmly, I was going to get mad at him but I realized he was right. Dominic and I had horrible communication skill with our mother, well not so much him, but I did. I was always one to go to daddy if something was wrong, not mommy.

"She should have been observant enough to see my bruise at least." said looking at me wrist, Jasper's jaw tightened.

"The only reason I saw it was because your sleeve was rolling up." He was still angry about me getting hurt. " And I am more observant than most." I couldn't help but laugh at the way he said that, it seemed like the fact that he didn't notice irritated him. "Why are you laughing?" he asked giving me a look that clearly read, Are you crazy?

"The way you said that!" I couldn't stop the giggles from escaping my mouth. I looked at him still giggling to see if he was mad and to my surprise his mouth was twitching his shoulders were shaking a bit, it took me a little while to figure out he was trying to hold in a laugh. This however only made me laugh harder.

"Stop laughing!" he said smiling still doing his best to hold in the laugh. "When other people laugh I do to." he put his hand on his mouth and looked like he was holding his mouth.

I smiled as his struggle continued, as soon as I stopped laughing for a moment and when I did I couldn't start again. "Aw its not funny any more." I said frowning. I saw him smile out of the corner of my eye. _He has to be doing it! _I told my self.

Jasper looked at his watch and stood up. "Well I need to be getting back now." I nodded and stood up as well. "You need to go inside as well." I looked at him at sighed.

"Yeah, yeah ,yeah." I said rolling my eyes. He said bye and then started walking in the direction I figured his house was.

I smiled as I saw him vanish into the night. I then decided he was right and I did need to go back inside. When I got inside my moms door was closed meaning she had gone to bed, I guess I stayed out there longer than I though. I opened my door and Dominic was waiting for me.

"Where were you?" he asked standing up.

"I was talking to my therapist." I said sitting on my bed.

Dominic looked at me. "Ok, I'm not saying you don't need one but there are no therapists in Elkmont."

I glared at him as I took off my shoes. "I was talking to Jasper, and he was saying a lot of deep things so I am calling him my therapist."

"What the hell was Jasper doing here?" He asked looking at me.

"Oh believe me I asked the same thing." he nodded. "He had given his phone to Alice and she left it here." I explained.

After Dominic left my room and I changed clothes I laid down, it took a while for me to get to sleep but when I did I regretted it. I had a dream of Jasper, only he was…. A vampire, blood was what had given it away. He was with a woman, never was her name spoken but some how I knew her name was Maria. Then it hit me I wasn't only seeing Jasper, I was Jasper. I was seeing through his eyes, that how I knew the extremely beautiful woman's name. The most freighting thing in this dream was something that… was out of my worst nightmares, it was like an army of savage vampires. They were all crazy, wild and truly terrifying. I as Jasper stayed back away from the others, then Maria called me over and despite my wishes I walked over to her. Right when it looked like one of the vampires were about to jump on me I woke up.

I held my chest as my heart beat out of control. I laid back down but couldn't go back to sleep or better yet I refused to go back to sleep afraid the dream would return.

**_OK someone told me that they would like to see _**_**the previous chapter in Jasper's Perspective, so tell me if you like that idea to. **_


	6. Holding hands fixed

_**Ok Someone told me they didn't like how Joanna was getting messed with so much and I am going to have her being messed with again! And I am going to say this so I don't get another message for someone telling me how they hate it. **__**LUCAS HATES JOANNA BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T LIKE HIM!! HE WANTS JOANNA BUT HE WON'T TELL HER BECAUSE HE IS USED TO GIRLS FALLING ALL OVER HIM!! **__**Sorry for those who didn't want to know that yet, I just don't want another message like that! I said its ok to send criticism but DO NOT send me a message with cursing in it! And I am not changing things to go with Breaking Dawn!!**_

I couldn't get the dream out of my head no matter how hard I tried. For the most part I could be myself around people, yet for some reason I couldn't bring myself to talk to Jasper. When school started he tried to talk to me a few times but he gave up on Thursday. I wanted to talk to him but every time I would think about it the dream would come back to me and I couldn't. Perhaps the most curious thing about the dream was the fact that I wasn't really afraid of him, I really didn't know what I was. Well stupid was one thing, I wasn't afraid of Jasper yet I wouldn't talk to him, and he tried talking to me! Rosalie asked why a few times and I just told her that I just didn't feel like it. While I was pushing Jasper away, I was forming a very tight bond with Emmett and Rosalie. Rosalie and I were like best friends, and Emmett was like a big brother who could protect me. If someone was picking on me and Emmett was around he would stop it. Jasper did the same thing as well, I never talked to him yet he was always near me.

My mother had been told by Mr. Woods about my wrist and now I was being watched over like a hawk. If I went some where my mother wanted to know where I was and who was going to be there, from the way she acted you'd think I was in trouble. She also had called Lucas's mother and made him apologize, which made things bad at school. He was highly angry with me for getting him in trouble with his mother. Him and his friends seemed to loath me now, which was all fine with me I felt the same towards him, though I don't think they know what loath means.

The next Monday when I woke up it was sunny and bright, so I decided now was a perfect time to talk or try to talk to Jasper. I was happy going to school but when I got there I didn't see them, I waited for Bella, Alice, and Edward first period but they weren't here. Until lunch I figured they were just late but they weren't, they didn't come so Dominic and I went back to eating out side for the day. Dominic seemed a little lost with out Alice, they hadn't known each other long yet it seemed they had known each other forever. When the bell rang for Art class I sighed, I thought about ditching but I didn't want to smear my record. As I walked into art I put my things in the chair opposite me so no one would sit down next to me. I watched the door waiting for Mrs. Jenkins to cone in the class.

"So none of the Cullen's or Hale's here today?" I closed my eyes as Lucas sat across form me. "I think I'll sit here today." I looked at him and he was smirking.

"Um can you please not sit there, I want to sit alone." I watched his smirk turn into a frown.

"Hale is good enough to sit with you yet I'm not?" his voice was now an angry whisper. I didn't want to look at him but I did. His eyes were burning into mine and his jaw was in a tight scowl.

"I never said that, I just feel like sitting alone that's all." I said my voice was quiet, I didn't want to get any louder than I was.

"You only want to sit alone because you can't sit with Hale." he spat. "Do you think he likes you or something? Because believe me he doesn't, no one here likes you. I don't know why you think he sits with you but I know." I looked at him and tears threatened to fall. "Its because he takes pity on you, really you should hear how he talks around everyone else."

"Liar!" my voice was horse and sore from holding back. "Jasper doesn't feel sorry for me, he's my friend!" he snorted.

"Like hell he is." Lucas whispered as Mrs. Jenkins came into the room with a smile on her face. She gave us a brief lesson on still paintings and then told us we were to do one, it was to be our first big assignment.

Through out art I stuck to sketching out my painting, which was going to be a bouquet of blue roses that were thrown down in a doorway at night with the door open. Sound stupid? I don't care, I like it! While I sketched mine out Lucas was already on painting, I knew it would be crap because most of the time he would look at me and glare. I tried to keep my thoughts on my painting but I kept wishing that Emmett or Jasper would magically show up, but that was stupid. At the end of class I put away my things quickly as I could trying to avoid talking to Lucas.

"Hey , I'll see you after school." Lucas said smiling as he walked past me. I groaned and felt like I was going to cry.

For the rest of the day I thought about ways that I wouldn't see Lucas, but aside form ditching I could think of nothing. Ditching did linger in my mind until History, there I decided my best bet was to just stay with Dominic. My plan worked until about five minutes to the end of school.

"Can we have Dominic McCarty in the office please?" came the cackling voice of the secretary over the intercom.

Mr. Woods looked at Dominic then back up "Well you don't really want him but if you insist." he said smiling. I watched Dominic the entire time he walked out the door and prayed he would be back before the bell. However I never had good luck with praying, the bell rang and Dominic was no where in sight. I hurriedly grabbed my things and left the class room I didn't want to waist any time but I needed to go to my locker. As I got my things out of my locker I felt two people behind me. I turned around and looked up, Marcus and DJ were standing behind me.

"Hey Joanna!" Marcus said smiling down at me, Marcus and DJ were Lucas's best friends and I knew they were making me stay there.

"Wow I haven't talked to you in a long time!" DJ smiled as well.

"Yeah no kidding, well I have to go." I said as I tried to go in between them but the only moved together.

"Lucas wants to talk to you, man just give him a chance." Marcus asked with real sincerity. Marcus had always been one of the nicer people to me in the school.

"I'm here." I heard Lucas announce as DJ and Marcus moved. "Hey Joanna, you waited for me like I asked." He said smiling.

"No I didn't I was just leaving!" I said trying to walk around him when he grabbed my arm and pushed me into the lockers, with a little more force than necessary.

"I wasn't done talking to you!" He said, I rolled my eyes.

"Well I'm done talking to you!" I smiled and went to walk past him again.

This time he didn't grab me or push me he backhanded me right across my left cheek. I moved my hands to the side of my face and looked over at DJ and Marcus with wide eyes. They looked just as shocked as I probably did, I could feel the tears roll down my face.

"Lucas what the hell man!" Marcus asked walking up to him.

"Go away!" Lucas yelled looking away from me. I looked around and the halls were empty but I knew a teacher had to me around some where so I did something to get there attention.

"Help!" I yelled at the top of my lungs hoping some teacher would hear me. Then out of my peripheral vision I saw Lucas raise his fist and hit me right on the lip. I had never been punched before and Lucas wasn't like Dominic on the strength scale, he seemed to be more like Edward was, so When he hit me my head hit the top of the locker where the edge of the wood was. I could feel the warm blood coming form my lip as well as the back of my head.

"Lucas!" DJ yelled as he joined Marcus. I had slid to the floor and was sitting down watching them with tears running down my face.

"Help me!" my voice was cracked and not very loud, I saw Lucas go to hit me again but Marcus grabbed him. Lucas didn't get to punch me again but he did kick me right at the bottom of my eye.

"Hey!" I didn't want to hear the voice I did. I looked up at Dominic begging him with my eyes to go away. "What the hell!" he yelled kneeling down next to me. I grabbed his hand and looked up at him.

"What's going on!" I knew that was Mr. Woods voice. I saw Lucas straighten up and try to move where I wasn't able to be scene.

"Joanna I heard Mrs. Heflin yell as she made her way over to me. She pushed Dominic out of the way and used her shirt to wipe of some of the blood. I saw that Mr. Rojas had come out of his classroom as well.

"Mr. Johns go with Mr. Rojas to the principles office." Mr. Woods said to Lucas as he walked over to me, Mrs. Heflin's shirt was covered in more blood than I thought was coming out. Mr. Woods walked over to me and knelt down.

"Are you ok to get up?" he asked as I nodded, Mrs. Heflin and Mr. Woods both grabbed my arms and helped me stand up. I felt a little dizzy as they stood me up but not to much.

"Are you ok?" Dominic asked with Marcus and DJ bye his side. I tried to talk but my mouth was full of blood and my lip was clearly busted. I looked down at the spot I had been and saw a small trail of blood on the bottom half of the locked and the floor was, covered in my blood.

"You two go home, and Dominic follow us." Mrs. Heflin directed. I wasn't really paying attention, the pain in my face and head was to severe.

As I was put in the nurses office and she tried to stop the bleeding. I saw Dominic in the corner looking at me worried more than I had ever seen him before. Tears were in his eyes and I wanted to tell him it would be ok but I wasn't able or allowed to talk. As she worked on my face I went over what had happened in my head, when Lucas said he wanted to meet me I knew it was bad but I didn't know this would happen. It didn't seem like Marcus or DJ thought it would ether, the looks on there faces was to real, I knew it wasn't practiced. They had told me earlier that they had called my mother because I needed stitches, but she wasn't here yet.

"Where is she!" I spoke to soon, I could hear the panic in my mothers voice. The next thing I new my mother was at my side with her bag. "Oh my God, honey are you okay?" She asked getting out the shot she needed, I nodded wirily, I hated needles. Dominic knew this all to well because he was at my side holding my hand.

The shot hurt like hell, I would compare it to being shot, but then again I have never been shot. When she began to put the stitches in I felt nothing, the shot numbed my entire mouth area. My lip ended up needing 8 stitches and the back of my head 12. I was then informed that Lucas was put in AEP for a few months. As my mother gathered up her things I stayed close to Dominic, who still hadn't let go of my hand. My mom led us outside into the cool air, it was cloudy and misting a bit, which was a big change from earlier.

"Get in the car." she said opening her door. I looked at our truck as Dominic did the same.

"What about the truck?" Dominic asked her.

She bit her lip. "Well Dominic can drive it home and Joanna you can go with me." I looked at Dominic then her.

"NO!" I yelled. "I'm going with Dominic!" I grabbed his arm and held. I noted how my voice was still slurred from the shot to my lip.

"Joanna!" my mother looked up and let out a sigh. "On one condition!" she said pointing at us. We both nodded waiting for it. "I have to get back to work and I want an adult there, so I am going to ask Mrs. Cullen to watch you." I nodded, wondering if she would bring her kids. I doubted it, they weren't in school today so I doubted if she would bring them. I got in the truck and Dominic looked at me.

"Why did that happen?" he asked quietly as we drove out of the parking lot.

I looked out the window trying to think of why he did it, but I could figure out why. "I honestly don't know, I think it was that I screamed." Dominic didn't' say anything, I turned and looked at him. He was staring out the window with his hands gripped tightly on the string wheel. I looked away and thought about how I looked now I would have looked out the window but the rain prevented good vision. In the end I decided to wait till I got home to look, I laid my head against the window when a song that meant so much to me now came on, Don't laugh at me by Mark Wills.

I'm a little boy with glasses  
The one they call the geek  
A little girl who never smiles  
'Cause I've got braces on my teeth  
And I know how it feels  
To cry myself to sleep

I'm that kid on every playground  
Who's always chosen last  
A single teenage mother  
Tryin' to overcome my past  
You don't have to be my friend  
But is it too much to ask

Don't laugh at me  
Don't call me names  
Don't get your pleasure from my pain  
In God's eyes we're all the same  
Someday we'll all have perfect wings  
Don't laugh at me

I'm the cripple on the corner  
You've passed me on the street  
And I wouldn't be out here beggin'  
If I had enough to eat  
And don't think I don't notice  
That our eyes never meet

I lost my wife and little boy when  
Someone cross that yellow line  
The day we laid them in the ground  
Is the day I lost my mind  
And right now I'm down to holdin'  
This little cardboard sign...so

Don't laugh at me  
Don't call me names  
Don't get your pleasure from my pain  
In God's eyes we're all the same  
Someday we'll all have perfect wings  
Don't laugh at me

I'm fat, I'm thin, I'm short, I'm tall  
I'm deaf, I'm blind, hey, aren't we all

Don't laugh at me  
Don't call me names  
Don't get your pleasure from my pain  
In God's eyes we're all the same  
Someday we'll all have perfect wings  
Don't laugh at me

When the song ended we were home, Dominic was the first out. I quickly wiped my eyes and got out, the water droplets felt good against my skin but then I remembered my mom told me not to get my stitches wet. I put my bag over my head and walked in slowly. As I got in I looked down at my shirt and it had blood on it, I didn't want anyone to see that. I went to my room and changed shirts with a severe pain in my face when I Pulled the shirt over my head. When I walked back into the living room Dominic was no where in sight so I decided to look at myself. I walked over to a mirror my mother had in the living room. Above the mirror was the saying 'What you do today you'll have to live with tomorrow.' I sighed and looked in the mirror, my hair was messed up, my right eye was bruised and swollen, my cheek had a big bruise where he slapped me, and my lip looked horrible…. I looked horrible. I heard a light knock at the door, "Come in." I said not to loudly. I heard the door open and a gasp. "Oh my God Joanna what happened to you?" I knew that was Rosalie's voice, I turned around surprised and saw her, Esme, Alice, Emmett, and Jasper. There faces all held different expressions Rosalie's was a mix of anger and sadness, Esme's showed only concern, Alice's was mostly shock and concern, Emmett was clearly shocked. Jasper's face was unreadable, anger was most apparent, followed by shock, but there were so many others I couldn't tell you half of them.

"I… I'm ok, it was nothing." I stuttered not looking at them.

"Who did this?" Esme asked walking over to me with Rosalie and Emmett behind her. Jasper looked like he was shaking and Alice had his hand.

"No one." I didn't want to answer them. I don't know why but Emmett seemed to feel like he needed to protect me, not like a dad, but more like and uncle. **((A.n: that s because he is your great uncle!!… Sorry)) **

"You did not do this to your self!" Emmett yelled, just then Dominic came down stairs and walked over to me. I looked at Jasper from the corner of my eye, Alice had waved at Dominic then looked back at Jasper who's eyes were black but it wasn't like the other times. Before it they were hungry almost but now it was pure hatred and anger.

Rosalie sent a glare at Emmett before looking back at me. "Are you ok?" she asked. "What happened?" she asked me. I bit my lip and shook my head, I wasn't going to tell. Then someone knocked on the door. I walked past everyone to get the door, I could feel Jasper's eyes on me the entire way. Shrugging it off I opened the door and my eyes got wide as I saw Marcus.

"Hey Joanna, we just wanted to apologize." I shook my head no trying to get Marcus to shut up, but he didn't get it. "We didn't know he was going to do that, I swear."

"He who?" Jasper asked in a truly freighting voice. Marcus looked at him with wide eyes, I turned around and he was right behind me, but still keeping a few inches in between us.

"Uh Lucas." Marcus stammered. I heard Jasper take a sharp breath, I looked up and Emmett was holding his shoulder. _I know I would have heard Emmett move! _I thought.

"Lucas did this to you?" Jasper yelled making me flinch and look down. "Why didn't you tell me it was him."

"Jasper." Esme said in a warning voice. I looked over at her from the corner of my eye. She was watching Jasper and looked like she was waiting for something.

"I better get going." Marcus said as I heard him leave. He was probably afraid of Jasper, I knew I was.

When I found my voice I spoke, but in no more than a whisper . "I didn't want you to get mad."

"I'm not mad!" he snapped, I looked up at him slightly and would have laughed if I wasn't so scared. Emmett was looking at him like he was crazy and Jasper was glaring at him. Jasper shook his head and walked out of the house. I bit my lip debating on whether or not to go after him. Sighing I walked out the door after him, it was my fault he was mad. I saw Emmett go to follow but Alice grabbed his am and shook her heard. After about five minutes of looking for him I gave up, I was walking back when I saw him leaning against a tree with his eyes closed. I didn't think he knew I was there but as I got closer he spoke. "Go home Joanna." he said in one breath.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you." I said as loud as I could. My voice this time wasn't quiet because of fear but of awe. He was leaning his tall body on a tree, his back was against the tree and his legs were at an angle holding him up. His pale hands were in the pockets of his black pants, as I looked at his shirt I saw it was a dark green long sleeves shirt making his skin look like the glowing moon. His honey blond hair was draped over his closed eyes, and little rain drops were on his face. The way he looked truly took my breath away.

'That's not why I'm out here." he said in his angelic voice. I furred my eyebrows and looked at him confused. "I scared you, I couldn't stand that I did that." he was angry with him self for scarring me, I couldn't believe it. Once again I thought he was mad at me and I was wrong, then I don't know what possessed me to do it but I grabbed his hand. His eyes shot open and he looked down at me surprised and scared. I was shocked to, he had the body temperature of a corpse, and his hand was as hard as marble.

"I wasn't really afraid of you, more what you could do." I whispered. His eyes were on my hand which despite the cold felt nice.

"What can I do?" he asked looked at me. I thought for a moment, I didn't really know.

"I don't know, I just know in my heart you are more than you are letting be known." I hoped that didn't make him think I was crazy. I heard him let out a sound, it was like a laugh but a sad one.

"Am I dangerous?" he asked, his eyes held a curiosity. I was going to say no but I remembered the dream.

"You are, but I feel you wouldn't hurt me." I didn't have time to think because he had leaned down and was looking at me.

"Only because that how I make you feel!" he wasn't yelling but his voiced was stressed, he was trying to get me to understand something. I had also realized he hadn't let go of my hand yet, but now his hand wasn't limp but holding mine very tightly.

"How could." he cut me off before I could finish.

"Don't you get it!" he said. "You shouldn't be here with me you should be in another town! One that I don't know." I believed him but I didn't want to go away from him.

"But I want to be here with you." I whispered, I never intended to tell him that but I just did, so I would roll with it.

Jasper let go of my hand and walked back to the tree, at first his back was to me then he turned to face me. "Yeah that's why you ignored me at school, I tried talking to you against my better judgment and you ignore me. Now you say you want to be here?"

I shook my head so I wouldn't cry, I never imagined I would yell at him but I did. "I was planning on saying sorry today! I felt really bad all weekend, I'm sorry I ignored you!" I felt a tear fall down my face. I felt worse then before about ignoring him, I san to the cold ground, damp from the few rain drops that had hit the ground.

"Don't be sad." He said in a whisper as the crying stopped and the sadness stopped. "I don't like it when your sad, it affects me no matter where I am." I didn't understand what he meant but it seemed like he wanted it that way. However it did make me more convinced that Jasper was the reason my emotions were all messed up. He was just looking at me, his eyes for the first time held nothing but….. Affection maybe?

"I'm sorry." I said looking at him, he had sat down across from me and was looking at the ground.

He closed his eyes and bit the inside of his lip, then he reached out slowly and grabbed my hand. "You have nothing to be sorry for." I looked at our hands, it felt as if he was barely touching me, and I know it was wrong but I wanted him to touch me more. **((Not in a perverted way!)) **As we sat there saying nothing I was calm, I didn't know how long we had been there ether. I heard a crash of thunder, I jumped and held Jasper's hand tighter. At first I was afraid of his reaction but I looked at him and he smiled a bit and held my hand tighter. My hand was cold, but comfortable, I felt, despite what he had said, safe.

"Loud noises startle me." I admitted sheepishly.

He smiled sympathetically and looked at the sky. "Why did Lucas do this to you?" he asked, I knew he would ask but I wasn't sure when.

"I don't know, he wouldn't let me leave and when I tried he slapped me. When he turned around I screamed and he punched me, which made my head hit the locker, and the last time I screamed he kicked me here." I raised my free hand to my bruised eye. "I've never seen that much blood." shook my head as I remembered The locker, the floor, my clothes, as well as Mrs. Heflin's.

"Was there a lot?" he asked fighting a smile, he closed his eyes.

"Yeah, why?" I asked him. It was a little weird that he was smiling at that but I brushed it off.

"No particular reason." He said shaking his head. I nodded but I didn't completely believe him. As another crash of thunder came, it felt like the who earth shook, I nearly felt my heart stop. "Come on, its getting late, and your going to have a heart attack." he said letting go of my hand and standing up.

"Its not late." I said, we hadn't been out there long, only a couple of minutes.

"Look around, its dark now." He said calmly, I did what he said and looked around. It was dark just as he said. Sighing, not really wanting to go back, I stood up and stretched making a squeaking noise as I did so. I heard Jasper laugh a bit, "You squeak." he said clearly amused.

I rolled my eyes, "And you say confusing things!" I said sticking out my tongue like a five year old. I started to walk back towards my house as I heard his light laughter behind me and could help but smile. As I felt him next to me I let my smile vanish and replaced it with a frown.

As my house came into view I could see my mothers car in the drive way, next to Esme's. _'Oh she gets home and I'm gone, great!' _I thought as we got up to the door, I was about to knock when I remembered it was my house. Rolling my eyes at my stupidity I opened the door. I could see Emmett and Rosalie watching t.v and could hear my mother and Esme in the kitchen, and I thought I heard Dominic's voice in the kitchen as well, but the only thing he went in there for was eating and getting something to drink. Then I saw why Dominic was in the kitchen helping, Alice pranced out of the kitchen and over to us.

"Welcome home!" she said cheerily. I saw Dominic come out of the kitchen and almost started laughing. "Hey I didn't know Dominic liked to help your mom cook." she said and I couldn't hold it any longer, I started laughing.

"Wow Dominic, I wonder what was in that kitchen that made you want to go in there!" I said sarcastically as his face got red and he looked away from me. I saw Esme walk into the living room, wiping her hands off with a rag.

"Well we should get home now." She said as Emmett and Rosalie stood up and walked to there mother.

"Bye I will see you guy's tomorrow." Alice said hugging Dominic and me lightly then skipping out to the car.

"See you at school shorty." Emmett said holding his hand above my head.

Rosalie slapped his hand away and rolled her eyes. "Sorry about the idiot, see you." Rosalie said grabbing Emmett's arm and pulling him outside. I could hear Emmett whining and Rosalie scolding him and laughed.

"Its better when your like that." I heard Jasper say in the same quiet voice he had used earlier. "It suits you more than anything else." I smiled and nodded. "I'll see you at school." he said before he walked out. As he closed the door, despite what he said earlier and despite what I knew about him being dangerous I wanted him to come back.

"Come on you two dinners ready." my mother said from in the kitchen. I walked over to Dominic and jumped on his back smiling. He laughed and held me up on his back carrying me into the kitchen. I was glad my day had gone from, bad to worse, to the best day ever, really I was ready to sing Sponge bobs Best day ever song.

"Ok no piggy back rides in the house." my mom said smiling as Dominic put me down. I hopped in my seat and he did the same. "Well someone is in a new found good mood!" my mom put our plates in front of us. I shrugged and ate my supper not saying anything, when I was finished I walked up to my room and threw my self on my bed.

"So what happened out there?" Dominic asked smiling as he walked into my room. I looked at him then came up with a little game.

"Who says that's what I'm happy about?" I asked him, eyebrows raised.

"You were on cloud nine when you came back." He said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

I thought about continuing my game but, it would get boring soon. I looked at him then sighed, "Jasper held my hand!" I said smiling as big as I could. I waited for him to say something but he didn't. I looked at him and he was looking at a poster I had on my wall, "Well?" I asked him

He looked at me and raised his eyebrows. "Well what?" he asked.

I groaned "You are suppose to be happy!" I sat up straight on my bed.

He nodded "Well I really don't get why its such a big deal." I threw a pen at him, which he dodged only to run to my chair and fall into it.

"It wouldn't have been so bad if you hadn't tried to dodge my pen." I said sticking my tongue out. Dominic sat up straight in the chair and rubbed his shoulder. "And it's a big deal because it is!" I said laying back down.

"Okay, next time he holds your hand I will throw a party." he said sarcastically.

I smirked "So you like to help in the kitchen now?" I asked him smiling.

"Oh shut up and go to sleep!" he said getting out of the chair and walking out of my room.

"You go to sleep!" I yelled smiling

"Not before you!" he countered in the same yell.

"Both of you go to sleep and stop yelling!" I shut up, my mother has to get up at five o'clock most mornings and I didn't want her to be mad at us, or me really. I lied on my bed and looked the ceiling, today had been very eventful, and I didn't mind the last part happening again!

_**Some one asked for a fluffy chapter and I gave it! I hope its ok****!**_


	7. AN, READ THIS!

**Hey! I know I hate A.N as much as you do but I feel this one is necessary! I haven't made an update and haven't even started on one because I was working on this story from Jasper's view! Its called 'Her Blood is Chocolate' and any fan of this story should read that one! So NOW I will begin working on the next chapter of this story! Oh yeah thanks to all of my reviewers! **


	8. Life is Great

_**Well it seems like people really like me SHA and HBIC stories! Thanks for all the reviews for both of them. HBIC will take longer to update, sorry about that, but here is chapter 7 of SHA!**_

I awoke at around 6:00 and yawned, instantly regretting it. A sharp pain went through my mouth and right to my head, I fell back on my bed and held in a scream. I had forgotten about my beating yesterday, well for a second I did. The way it felt to be punched in the face so hard that you hit the back of your head so hard that you bleed, that was not something you easily forget, no matter how hard you try. I sat up in my bed and just sat on the edge for a while, Did I really want to go to school today? I knew people would ask, and people would know, this was a very small town so the whole school would know that Lucas beat me up, and they would probably have some wild rumor going along with it. I stood up with a sigh and took my Joker from the Dark Knight t-ee and a pair of cargo pants. I added my batman gloves and my make up then walked into Dominic's room, I looked at his poster of Kat Von D, he kinda had this weird crush on her, but I just liked her tattoos, when I was 18 I decided I wanted to get a huge Japanese fan dancer on my back. I looked in his closet and found what I was looking for, his black belt with dark blue studs. I just left it hanging loosely off my hips.

Now was time for the long process I called fixing my hair, I walked into the bath room and looked at my face, my lips were always to big and to full. My brother said I had Angelina Jolie's lips, but they looked better on her. There was noting I could do about my lips but I could do something about that curly mop on my head, my dad said that every one in his family had curly hair, Dominic didn't have curly hair but I did. My mother told me she would kill for my curls, I told her I would let her have them freely. Once that task was done I made some finishing touches on my make up and went into the kitchen, I didn't find any breakfast but I found the second best thing to chocolate, a cherry lollipop. I then walked back in Dominic's room. He was digging around in his closet for something, I sat on his bed across from the closet and watched him. He looked over at me then rolled his eyes.

"No wonder I couldn't find it." He said standing up straight. I looked at him confused. "My belt, I was going to wear it." I looked down and shrugged.

Dominic then started to laugh, I took my lolli out of my mouth. "What's Funny?" I asked.

Once he regained composer he cleared his throat "You look so innocent now!" I glared at him. "Even with the cuts you look so sweet and innocent!" I stuck my tongue out at him and hopped off his bed. "That lollipop makes your lips look bigger!" he yelled from outside the door. I jumped up to follow him, he was at the door when we heard a knock. I rolled my eyes and took out my lollipop out of my mouth and opened the door.

"Joanna!" I was wrapped in the tiny arms of Alice Cullen before I knew what hit me. "Hey, we decided that we could drive the two of you to school." We? Who else was with her? Once she let me go I looked past her and saw Jasper.

I couldn't stop the blush that crept on to my cheeks, I noticed that Jasper had moved his hand over his mouth slightly and looked as if he had stopped breathing. "Well you guy's don't have to do that, we can drive ourselves." I said not wanting them to feel like they needed to, I did it to hid my excitement that I was going to get to spend time with Jasper earlier than most days.

"We know that silly!" Alice was on her way to the back, I guess she was looking for Dominic.

I smiled a bit and looked up at Jasper. "He really likes her." I don't really know why I told him that but it just felt like the right thing to do.

"She feels the same, but she doesn't want to tell him until he tells her." he had moved his hand from him mouth and had it handing at his side, I wanted so bad to grab his hand like yesterday but, I held back.

"She doesn't know that he will, he is very shy." I knew why I asked this, but I never really admitted it before, Alice seemed to know how things were going to turn out. Yes its another one of my psychopath observations.

Jasper looked down at me curiously for a second then shrugged. "She seems pretty sure he will eventually." I could hear them talking in the back but I couldn't hear what it was about. The clock read 7:15, this angered me because we didn't have to be at school till 8 o'clock.

"Why the hell did you two come over so early?" I asked Jasper walking over to the couch and sitting down.

He looked over at the clock as if he didn't know it was early. "I didn't notice the time." he paused then a small smile hit his face. "If you want I can leave." All to quickly I answered. "No don't do that!" Jasper let out a quiet laugh and I slumped back in my seat, how stupid did I sound. My pathetic feeling didn't last long, with one short glare from Jasper I was calm. "Sorry." I didn't know if he heard me but he did look at me and walk over to the couch. "I just don't have many people here that are my friends, and I like spending time with you." I looked up and closed my eyes, he was the soldier again, moaning the vampire would soon follow. My heart beat was going out of control now, just thinking of seeing him that way. I felt a calming wave go through me and felt Jasper's ice cold hand holding mine.

"I'll tell you this only once more. You have nothing to be sorry for." I opened my eyes and Jasper was back to normal. "I guess that why I came over as well." he laughed and shook his head. "I like spending time with you, go figure." I was really confused now, from his words I got that he liked spending time with me but, he shouldn't want to.

"Your saying confusing things again." I whispered looking at his had which still held mine.

"I like seeing your reaction when I say those things. I can read people facial expressions easily, it tells me how they are feeling sometimes, it helps me get a better understanding on things." he paused then smiled at me. "And you make very entertaining faces." His breath blew in my face, I pulled my hand away from his and moved to the opposite end of the couch. I bit the inside of my lip, I didn't want to move but his smile and his breath…. I just had to move. Jasper had closed his eyes and was walking towards the door, I watched him walk outside. I stood up and followed him, _'Why was he acting that way?' _He got in his car and started the engine, I ran as fast as I could and got in the car right as he took off.

"What the hell is your problem!" I asked slamming the door as we drove down the road. He didn't answer me. "Why are you so damn emotional!" my accent was full on now, and I didn't care. One moment he was being sweet and the next he bolted out of the door.

"Why do you care?" he asked, the harshness in his voice took me back. "I am dangerous, you know that! Why do you care how if I leave you alone or not?" He was angry now, I had never seen him truly angry before now. This time it was my fault for someone's emotions I could feel tears rolling down my face.

"Just take me home." I whispered, I didn't want to look at him, I was the reason he was angry, I was the one who moved away, and I got him mad. I sniffled a bit and waited for him to start the car, which didn't happen. I looked over at him from the corner of my eye.

"Once again I have made you cry." his voice was low. "I've never wanted to make you cry, I hate people crying in front of me. Never have I caused someone so many tears with out meaning to. Not wanting to is an understatement, loathing the very thought is a better description." I watched him as he hit the steering wheel, I knew he was barely hitting it but it still sounded like he was hitting it hard. I wasn't sure what to say or do but he didn't look like he was going to start the car anytime soon.

"Its not your fault, my mom has always called me her emotional roller coaster." I let out a weak laugh and put on a fake smile trying to cheer him up. I was to lazy to hide my accent now so I just did my best to ignore it.

"Stop trying to cheer me up Joanna." I looked down, I did what he said and stopped. He looked at me then started the car. "So home is were you want to be."

I thought about it for a moment then looked at the clock, 7:30. "No I want to stay out here with you." I answered truthfully.

He rolled his eyes. "You just told me you wanted to go home." he hadn't taken off yet so maybe he was listening to me.

With a shrug I grabbed his hand slowly, this seemed to be the only contact he allowed and I was going to take the opportunity any chance I got. "You seem calm now, your not yelling at me." he started rubbing the back of my hand with his thumb.

He looked at me with his head cocked to the side a bit. " I wasn't really yelling at you." I was confused. "I was yelling at myself for letting you do that, for letting you care. But I don't think I would want it any other way." His voice was like silk, so smooth and calming.

As I watched him rub the back of my hand I remembered something I wanted to ask him. "Why did you leave like that?" he looked away from my face and looked like he was staring intently at something out side the window.

"For two reasons really, the first is the way you reacted to what I had done." he shook his head. "I don't know how to say the first one with out giving to much away." he looked at me with a small smile.

"I want you to give to much away, give it all away." I didn't think it would work but it was worth a try.

His beautiful laugh filled my ears. "I can't do that, I would love to but I can't." I nodded, I wasn't really expecting him to. However this did confirm that he was more then I knew. "I have figured out a way, to tell you my second reason though. I was to close and I was considering, terrible things, things out of your nightmares." I was frozen, once he said that I thought of my dream with him in it. The thought that crossed my mind with those words was that he was going to drink my blood.

"He is dangerous to me." I had said that to my self but to my horror he heard it.

"I am a danger to you more than I am to anyone else." His grip on my hand was loosing then tightening again, it was like he was fighting with himself. I tightened my grip and he did the same. "I'm not sure if I am happy or sad that you realize that."

"You are dangerous to me but a part of you will not let me." I grabbed his hand and smiled. "That part is clearly winning." I held our hands up and he looked at them.

"For how long?" his question wasn't for me but for himself, but I answered.

"I think as long as you are strong and have your family with you, you will succeed." I hoped that I was right.

He looked at me and looked like he was debating on something. "Tell me what you told Rosalie, about why you screamed in art class." I shook my head no, I was never telling him that. "Please." his voice was so calming, then all the worries about telling him were gone.

"You were first a confederate solider, you were in rankings by the decorations on your coat, Major I think, but you didn't stay that way to long." I looked at him scared for a moment then I felt the mellow feeling and he nodded waiting for me to continue. "Then you had red eyes they were crazy and you were coved in blood." I wasn't going to look at him now, he would think I was crazy.

"I'm sorry you had to see that." he held my hand very tightly. "You need to forget it though, it's the past." He was now talking more to himself than to me. I gritted my teeth at the grip he had on my hand.

"Jasper let go of my hand!" I said through gritted teeth. In less than a second he had released my hand and was as far away from me as he could get, he looked a little scared.

"How stupid am I!" he said hitting himself in the head. He looked back at me but was still no closer. "Do you need to go to the doctor? Do you want me to leave?" I looked at him for a minute, why was he freaking out over holding my hand to tight?

"Jasper chill, you just had a tight grip on my hand. Its ok nothings broken." I wasn't to sure on the broken part, my index finger was in more pain than the rest of my hand but I wasn't going to let him know.

He shook is head, "I should have known better!" he was hitting himself again.

"Stop it!" I didn't want to yell but if I hadn't he wouldn't have looked at me. "I am okay. You didn't cause any real harm." Jasper looked at me for a moment then grabbed my hand very gently.

"Are you sure your not hurt bad?" He looked so worried and concerned that I couldn't help but smile. "What?" he asked looking at me with the same worried expression.

"Nothing, your expression is heart warming." I wanted to say it was cute but he didn't know I thought he looked good, which was an understatement.

"Oh." He looked over at the clock and cursed. I looked over to see why, it was 8:02. "Damn it were late." I was about to freak out, never in my life had I missed a day of school, or be late, I had been early yes but never late.

"Oh great there going my record!" I was about to cry, I know it was a little dramatic but all I had here was school, and I was the only person in town who had never been late, never missed a day, never got a score lower than an B, and that was only once!

"Calm down Joanna its only school." He had started the car and was driving down the road at a very fast speed, but I didn't care I was a speed demon.

"Yeah only school, the only thing I am good at!" He laughed a bit and I glared at him.

"You are good at things you don't even know." Now I was confused, what did he mean? "Come on get out." I was taken aback, was he kicking me out of the car?"What?" I asked. "Aren't you going to at least take me to school?"

The look on his face was priceless as he spoke these words. "Joanna, we are at school." I never in my life felt stupider than I did at that moment. My face went redder than it ever had, I would have jumped off a cliff to get away from the situation. Jasper was laughing harder than I had ever heard him and that made me feel even worse. "Don't be so embarrassed, I drive to fast and you weren't paying attention." he was doing his best not to laugh and it wasn't working.

"Well I am glad I'm so amusing to you!" I got gut of the car and started walking to the office. I didn't hear his footsteps but I saw his feet in front of me.

"I'm sorry Joanna, I wasn't really making fun of you." I looked up at him and he wasn't laughing or trying to hide a laugh. My face was still very red and I noticed his eyes were a little darker than before.

I sighed and nodded, "I know, I just feel stupid!" I hated that! Jasper just had something that made you feel perfectly fine with spilling your guts to him! But I liked that he listened, and he did seem to care.

"Don't." He paused and seemed to be looking for the right word. "I think its kinda cute." I bit the inside of my lip to stop myself from squealing. I know sounds fan-girlish right, but you picture Jasper Hale saying something about you was cute.

"Lets… lets go to class." I said faster than I normally spoke. I heard his laughter as we entered the building. I could hear one of the kindergarten teachers scolding her class, Jasper was a head of me and in the office. When I entered he was already talking to the office lady.

"Joanna and I were late this morning because of car trouble. Her car broke down on the way here and she called me to come and pick her up. We are sorry we were late, but there was no getting around it." He was leaning closer to her than necessary and I could tell she was being falling for the eighteen year old god in front of her.

She cleared her throat and threw away the pink slips and made new ones. "Well Mr. Hale as it was clearly unavoidable I see no reason for this to count against you." I was trying to hold back my laughter.

"Thank you." he whispered getting closer than before, then he walked away and I followed him. He handed me the pink slip that said that it was excused.

"That was bad!" I said my mouth unable to close. "I can't believe you did that."

He laughed a bit. "I didn't get her _that_ worked up." he shrugged

I scoffed "She you have raped you if you were alone!" I had never heard him laugh harder than he did then. It was so contagious that I laughed with him. It was a little hard to imagine that he had been angry this morning.

"I would have allowed it." now_ that _made me laugh. He looked down at me. "What?"

"I would hope not!" I looked around and we were almost to Mrs. Heflin's class. "She isn't even good looking!"

He chuckled "I only find one person in this school attractive." This perked my interest.

"Who is that?" I asked hoping he would tell but not expecting much.

He leaned down so we were eyes level and put his finger over his lips. "That's my secrete." I almost felt my heart stop, he was closer than he had ever been and his voice was so alluring. He stood back up and waved as he walked off. I looked around and I was in front of Ms. Heflin's class room, I did my best to calm myself down and opened the door.

"Well nice of you to join us." Ms. Heflin said looking at me, we were doing journal writing. I walked up to her desk and handed her the pink slip. She nodded and I got my binder from the shelve and sat at my desk in the back.

"Here is your bag." Alice said happily. I guessed that Dominic and Alice took the truck to school.

"Sorry about leaving like that." I whispered as I grabbed my bag. I forgot what hand that was and once I had in in my hand I dropped it as a pain shot through my hand.

"What's wrong." Bella asked. I thought about telling them that Jasper had squeezed my hand to hard but I didn't want him to think it was bothering me.

"Oh my hand is just a little sore." I lied grabbing it with my other hand. I saw Edwards mouth it was a tight line and he was shaking his head slightly. I ignored that and went on writing.

My classes before lunch were uneventful, In science Lulu wouldn't leave me alone, abut how I got beat up. In every class at least three people would ask me directly what happened, that didn't count the ones who whispered to each other wild and crazy ideas abut what had happened to me. Marcus and DJ kept apologizing to me, it was getting annoying, they clearly didn't know he was going to do that. It seemed that they thought that even if I said it was ok and I didn't blame them, they never believed me. A welcome annoyance was that after every class ether Rosalie and Emmett or Jasper was waiting for me. Emmett had told me that if anyone looked at me wrong he was going to have a few words with them and to that Rosalie would roll her eyes. While I was with Emmett he and I annoyed Rosalie, but not on purpose, it seemed that Emmett and I were separated at birth. We liked most of the same things, being loud was very fun and we both came up with the most random things. With Jasper I knew I had to be annoying him, but he denied it. I kept asking him about the girl he liked and he never gave me an answer, and when I guessed it was always wrong.

"Hey JoJo!" Emmett had taken to that nickname and it really didn't bother her. It was time for lunch and she had just gotten out of class.

"Hey Emmett, hey Rose." I said smiling as I walked over to them. My hand was bothering me a bit more now so I was careful not to move it.

Rosalie was looking at my hand. "What did you do to your hand?" she asked. I thought about telling the lie again.

"I didn't do anything to it." it wasn't a lie, she didn't really do anything.

"What's wrong with your hand then?" Rosalie asked again. Emmett's interest was perked, he was now looked over Rosalie's shoulder at me.

I sighed. "It was just a little accident." I said shrugging as we walked to the cafeteria. "Jasper got a little riled and he held my hand to tight." I whispered. Rosalie looked at me and shook her head but Emmett looked like he was going to explode. He was shaking and biting his lip when he burst out in laughter.

My face was red now. "Emmett shut up." Rosalie said in a stern voice. Emmett stopped laughing to some extent but still looked as if he was going to explode. As we walked into the cafeteria I could hear Emmett still snickering but I decided that maybe if I paid him no mind he would stop. I grabbed what ever food I wanted from the line and walked over to the table, every one but Jasper was already there. Dominic was talking to Alice and Edward and Bella were having there own conversation.

"Hey!" Alice piped up as three of us sat down. No one besides Dominic had touched there trays, as usual.

"Where is Jasper?" I asked taking a bite of an apple as Emmett laughed. It didn't talk long to know where he was.

"Right here." he said from behind me causing me to jump a little and hit myself in the face with the apple. I could hear Emmett's booming laughter, and Alice's musical giggle. My face was so red then, I didn't know why I got scared, well other than the fact that I didn't hear him or since him behind me.

"Are you ok?" He asked as I wiped the juice off my face.

"Yeah." I muttered, "You just surprised me." I said not looking at him.

"I'm sorry." he then looked over at his stop which Alice occupied. "Alice your in my seat." she giggled.

"This isn't your spot any more its mine." I was confused why did Alice sit there? I could see Edward looking at Alice smiling slightly which added to my confusion.

"Where am I suppose to sit?" that was a good question.

Alice shrugged and looked around. "I don't know in an empty chair?" I laughed a bit at that.

I saw Jasper make a mock laughing face. "There's a spot open next to Lulu, you can sit with her." I almost threw my apple at Edward.

"You go sit with her." Jasper said shaking his head no. Every one at the table seemed to be getting a kick out of this, well not Jasper. I had the suspicion that Alice and Edward had planed this.

"I've got Bella." Edward said simply. Jasper rolled his eyes and looked like he was getting annoyed.

"Well I have Joanna." he said grabbing a chair and placing it at an angel behind mine as he sat in it.

"Does she agree to that?" Emmett asked laughing. I felt my face heat up as Dominic laughed with him.

"Do you?" He asked, I looked back at him and was about to answer when I realized I didn't know what I was agreeing to.

"I'm not sure what I am exactly agreeing to." I said biting the inside of my lip. I heard Edwards quiet chuckle.

"I don't ether." Jasper admitted quietly. "Just go along with it!" he whispered to me.

I nodded unable to say anything else at the moment. I shook my head slightly "Yep he has me!" that sounded all to good to me. Jasper laughed behind me and moved his chair hitting my hand with his knee in the process. I closed my eyes and held in the pain trying not to let Jasper see but he did, however he didn't say anything to me. The rest of lunch passed smoothly, Emmett and I would take turns saying something stupid and every now and then Dominic would join. It felt comforting knowing that Jasper was behind me, he would move closer to me when he thought that I wasn't paying attention, Edward seemed to be looking at him every time he moved closer. After lunch I walked with Jasper to art class, without talking. This fact concerned me, he was fine until he hit my hand, was that what was bothering him?

"Hello, Jasper, Joanna." Mrs. Jenkins said musically as we walked into the classroom. She turned around and looked at me. "Are you ok today sweety?" I nodded and sat in the chair not looking at her. I had been asked that question by just about every teacher I saw and it was getting annoying. Mrs. Jenkins told Jasper what he was suppose to be doing as I got mine off the rack. I sat back down and he was already sketching out the picture he was going to paint, he was a much better artist than I was and much faster at drawing. I was still drawing mine, I hadn't even started paining yet. After the class had started Jasper still didn't talk to me."Why won't you talk to me?" I asked him not looking at him. He didn't answer, I looked up and he was still drawing. "Jasper." I said a little louder thinking that maybe he just didn't hear me. Still I received no answer. I was sure he had heard me that time so he ignoring me, I kicked the leg of his chair and he looked up at me. "Why are you ignoring me?" I asked him once again.

He sighed and put down the pencil. "I hurt you!" he pointed to my hand. "You don't want to talk to people who hurt you!"

"Only the ones who do it on purpose!" I whispered. "Yours was an accident, and as a mater of fact I don't care if you do it again!" He stared me right in the eyes. "Joanna McCarty that is stupid." I instantly felt like a child being scolded. He seemed to have a quality about him that made you think he was older than he was. "I hurt you and I knew that there was a big possibility that I would. You know that and yet you would still let me do that."

I rolled my eyes "Oh yeah you knew you could have hurt me when you held my hand! And yes, yes I would hold your hand again."

"I did and now you know, so I am going to have to be more careful and you more observant." He said in a strong voice that made me think of my dad superiors in the army.

"Yes Sergeant!" I said saluting him and rolling my eyes.

A small smile played on his lips. "I prefer Major."

I rolled my eyes and picked up my pencil. "Major pain in the ass maybe." I heard his quiet laughter and all of my previous anger disappeared. At the end of class I had finally started choosing the colors for the paint. Jasper had walked me to my next class despite the argument we had in art. As a farewell I saluted him and called him Major P.A (Pain in the ass). This seemed to put him in good spirits so I decided that was his nickname. The rest of the day continued as the first part of it was, being asked if I was ok, the rumors, being walked to class and making Rosalie think I was crazy. In history I walked saw that Alice and Dominic were already in class. I walked over to the front of the class room and sat on Dominic's desk.

"Hey Bubba." I said as he grabbed my hand. Alice smiled at me as she wrote down her notes from the bored.

"What's up sis?" he asked kicking my foot that hung off the other side of the desk.

"Nothing, just wanted to say hi." I smiled brightly at him as Mr. Woods told me to get off the desk. I sighed and slid into my desk and started writing down the notes. After class I was met by Jasper outside the door. "Hello Major P.A." I said smiling as he laughed.

"What does that mean?" Alice asked as Dominic's face asked the same question.

"Major Pain in the ass," I said as we walked towards the entrance.

Alice nodded and smiled. "Oh yeah he is that sometimes." Jasper looked down at her and shook his head as we meet Edward, Emmett Rosalie and Bella at the door. Jasper held the door open for me and smiled, I grabbed Dominic's hand once we were out the doors.

"What is Jasper sometimes?" Emmett asked as we walked into the parking lot.

"A major pain in the ass." Alice explained as Emmett laughed and Edward chuckled slightly.

"Sometimes?" Emmett asked as I laughed a bit at Jasper annoyed face. "Try all the time." Jasper showed Emmett slightly as we walked to our three cars. As I looked at them I felt a bit, well I don't really know how I felt. Poor, unequal, unworthy, all of those emotions disappeared and Jasper was shaking his head and looked slightly angered. My old truck was next to a shiny silver Volvo and a dark red H2 Maximum. My mouth fell open, was this the car I was in before? I had been in my dream car and I didn't even realize it.

"Is this your car?" I asked Jasper, I knew I sounded stupid then but I didn't care. I let go of Dominic's hand and he groaned. Emmett was watching me, Edward was smiling as was Jasper, Alice and Bella were looking confused and Rosalie was looking over my truck.

"Yeah it's the same one you were in this morning." I he said slowly as if I was stupid.

"Oh my god I love you." I heard Emmett's booming laughter and Edward's quiet laughter as I spoke. "Well not really but, yeah. This is like my dream car!" I hadn't really registered what I said to Jasper in my head. I was sure I would be blushing like crazy later but now I was in my own world. I looked over at jasper and he had a huge smile on his face, Edward looked as if he was holding in a laugh. It was obvious that Bella and Alice didn't like cars like I did, they had started a new conversation. Rosalie now seemed to be paying attention to us.

"Ok Joanna stop drooling." Dominic said annoyed. _'Bite me' _I told him in my head. Edward let out a small laugh and I looked over at him but quickly went back to looking at Jasper's car.

"You like cars?" Rosalie asked excitedly, she looked almost ready to jump for joy.

I nodded. "I love cars!" I replied with as much enthusiasm she had. "I'm a pretty good mechanic also." I was bragging a little but I hardly got to do that.

Rosalie hugged me tightly. "I am so glad I let you be my best friend!" that sounded a bit shallow but I didn't mind. Just as she told me she didn't have a lot of friends, it seemed her only friends were the Cullen's and at times Emmett looked like he had, had enough also. Jasper didn't take the shallow comment as easily as I did, he was glaring at her and his arms had stiffened. I could see even through the long sleeve shirt that he always wore muscles, he wasn't as burly as Emmett but more so than Edward, perfect. I saw Edward give me a strange look as I hugged Rosalie back.

"Yep!" I said smiling. "But you're the one who asked me to be your friend." I pointed out.

As she pulled away from me Emmett gave her a look and she looked down. "Oh, I'm sorry. That was really rude." She apologized.

I shrugged, "No problem." I decided to change the subject. "So do you work on cars?"

Rosalie looked as if I had asked the best question ever. "I'm the only mechanic any if our car's have ever seen. Besides maybe Edward, but I try to keep him away, even though he thinks he is a good mechanic he really isn't." I laughed as I saw Edward glare at her and she laughed. It had gotten really hot suddenly, the mist had stopped and only humidity was left.

I looked back at Japers Hummer, "Can you take me home in it?" I asked smiling.

He was about to answer when he looked over at Alice who was not moving with a blank look in her eyes. I was about to asked if she was ok when she snapped out of it. "Sorry Joanna but Carlisle and Esme need us home now." she said as Edward pulled on Jaspers arm and whispered something in his ear, or I thought he did, it was all very fast. They all said good bye then sped out of the parking lot at very fast speeds.

"Well what was there rush?" Dominic asked as I felt a warm liquid coming out of my nose. I touched the spot and it was blood.

I sighed, I always got nose bleeds when I was to hot, my mother told me I should move to Antarctica. Dominic had noticed my nose bleed and was getting napkins out of the truck. I knew my nose bleed had gotten worse, I was now spitting out blood that had entered my mouth, which was a lot. Dominic handed my a napkin and I put it under my nose and titled my head backwards. We both got in the truck and he started it, he glared at me.

"Why didn't you tell me you were getting to hot." He was angry and I rolled my eyes at him.

"I was preoccupied!" I said, my voice sounding funny because of holding my nose.

"Yeah looking at Jasper and his car!" he said rolling his eyes now.

I didn't want to get into an argument I couldn't win so I changed the subject. "Did you notice how right after Alice went all quiet they all left then my nose started to bleed?" I asked him.

He furred his brow. "Yeah and Alice always gives us hugs before she laves and she seemed eager to get out of there as fast as possible."

"Edward did to." I added. They were fine until Alice did that weird thing and they left right before I started bleeding. This further influenced my vampire theory, which was crazy. When I went to talk to Dominic in between us was a little girl with half of her face missing. I let out a whimper and shook like crazy, never had a sprit actually got this close to me, and I didn't like it.

"Joanna are you ok?" Demonic asked as I shook my head no, I had my eyes closed as tight as I could. Slowly I opened my eyes and the little girl was gone. I let out a deep breath and cried a bit. "It was a little girl, she had some of her head gone." He rubbed my back and my cell phone went of causing me to jump a little. I steadied my breathing and opened my phone. It was a text from Alice.

"_Hey Jasper wants to text you, is that ok?"_

"_Sure"_ why did he want to talk to me now?

"_Hey, sorry about leaving like that Esme needed us home to help her." _That was defiantly Jasper.

"_Oh its fine I understand" _I knew I didn't really sound as energetic as before but he wouldn't notice.

"_Are you ok Joanna?" _Ok I was wrong.

I wasn't going to tell _Jasper _about me being a freak who saw ghost so I told him about my nosebleed. _"I just had a Major nosebleed, but its no big" _

"_Are you ok now?!" _I couldn't help but laugh.

"_Yes I'm fine Jasper." _We had got to the house now and my mom was freaking out about my nose bleed.

"_Sorry Jasper my mom is freaking out lol" _

"_She should be! But bye anyway." _

I smiled as I got out of the car, was he worried about me? My mom had grabbed my shoulders and was looking at me. "Are you ok hunny?" she asked.

"Yes mom, now I need to go change shirts." She nodded and let me go. I first washed my hands and face then went and changed shirts. I laid down on my bed and finally blushed about telling Jasper I loved him. He knew what I was talking about didn't he? Dominic came into my room a little while later and sat on my bed pulling me out of my thoughts.

"What happened to your hand?" he asked. "I saw what you did in the cafeteria." I blushed as I thought about telling him why.

"It was just something that happened this morning." I said dodging the real answer.

"Yeah I guessed that much, but what happened?" He pressed on.

"Jasper held my hand to tight." I muttered but he still heard me.

He snickered a bit. "Jasper held your hand to hard." He was now laughing.

I rolled my eyes. "It's not that funny!" I yelled.

"Are you kidding me?" He asked me still laughing. "Big tough Jasper hurt you by holding your hand to hard!" I threw my pillow at him as he ran out of the room still laughing. I smiled as I remembered, I didn't mind that he hurt me, he was still touching me. I wasn't sure if he would tomorrow but for now like was great.

_**Ok! this chapter took me a while but I hope its good! The next chapter has a big time skip so things will start heating up next chapter... hummm for the long wait I will give you a small spoiler... the twins find a picture!!**_


	9. Jasper Hale and Jasper Whitlock

_**Ah yes, this is the chapter that really gets things started! I am so happy I have so many reviewers, thanks to you all. And I like to give my readers a little bit of what they want so yeah if you want something to happen message me and let me know! And Bella and Edward are not in it much yet because they are a relatively new couple and yeah you get it. **_

Before I even knew it a month and a half had gone bye, last year I would have never imagined school going by as fast as it did. The fact that I had friends made all the difference it seemed, even though I was still picked on I had my friends to help me through. Now it was mostly girls that picked on me, I was always with ether Jasper or Emmett and it seemed Jasper had proven his strength because the guy's stayed away from him as much as they did Emmett. Lulu was the main source of my problems, she had the idea that Jasper and I were going out, and I wished, but it wasn't happening. She said that we talked to much and said that she even saw us holding hands and a lot of other stuff that normal friends do. He tried to only allow physical contact when it was just me and him, but one day a few weeks ago he got angry with me for not telling him when I was feeling bad, or he said he was mad at him self for not noticing. I grabbed his hand and he shut up, I think that was the only time that Lulu could have seen that unless she was stalking Jasper and that could be a possibility.

Alice was almost always with Dominic, I believed they were going out until they both told me no, and I still don't completely believe them. Dominic never stopped talking about her and I was completely fine with that, he really liked her and she seemed to feel the same. Girls would say they liked Dominic then they would humiliate him in front of every one. I felt bad for him then but now he had Alice to talk to and I know she would never in a million years do that. Bella was my friend but she wasn't one of my best friends, sure we talked and all but she was usually with Edward. For some strange reason unknown to me Edward loved to pick on me with Emmett, I wasn't sure why but Edward who I pegged to be almost as much of a gentleman as Jasper, made fun of me. It wasn't rude just like an older brother would do to a sister, but I didn't expect it from him. Emmett was still the same as ever, loud, annoying, funny, competitive, and just like me. Jasper told me that Emmett was the reason that he could find one thing wrong with me, the nickname I gave him Major P.A, Emmett was fond of using as well. He told me that it was better than any of the ones he had ever came up with, which Rosalie said was a lot. Rosalie and I were really becoming best friends, she had started bringing car magazines to school and we would look over them and we would talk about what we could do to make them better. She was still a bit shallow with the way she talked but she was really getting better.

My mother had become really good friends with Carlisle and Esme, and I swear they were the nicest people in the world. Never in my life would I meet some one nice than them it was almost inhuman. My mother said that Carlisle was the best doctor this town had ever seen, she told me that it was like he had years and years of experience, but he was to young for that. Esme was into gardening as my mother was, she liked to decorate things so she was a perfect friend for my mom. Another person who annoyed me was my mother, wow not hard to figure out that one! The reason was she kept reminding me how good Jasper looked and how nice he was to me. I hadn't over looked those facts, but she seemed to think I did. Once I told her that its not me stopping a relation ship like that but him, this turned out to be a big mistake because she wanted to talk to him. When ever he was at my house my mom would point out little facts about me, it was really annoying. Jasper never really talked about that, he clearly knew I was embarrassed and was polite enough to not bring it back up.

The more time I spent with Jasper and the better I got to know him the more he told me he was dangerous. He would constantly tell me that I should be with him, I hadn't really gotten angry at him for it but it was a little aggravating. I usually took his warnings in a different way than he would like, to me he was only saying it because he cared, to him he was saying it so I would get smart, but when I asked him if he wanted me to go the answer was always no. Something that bothered me was the fact that at times when I was around he looked like he was in pain. He told me it was nothing I was doing but I didn't really believe him, I seemed to be the only one who affected him like that. I talked to Rosalie about it but she said the same thing he did, 'Your not doing anything.' The next time some one told me that I was going to have a fit.

I had noticed through out the past month that they never ate, they said they were vegetarians but they didn't even eat there fruits and vegetables. Dominic and I noted that in our stupid vampire book (not really a book just what we call it). Another thing was any time it was sunny they were MIA. If the sun was out they were home, they said that when it was really good sunny weather that they went camping. That was another thing I didn't believe, the weather here was usually pretty good even when the sun was not out and it got unbelievably hot when it was sunny. I also noticed with Jasper mostly, that when his eyes were dark he was in a bad mood. That was when I tried to talk to him as little as possible, it kept me out of the firing range. His eyes were never like the others, the pure golden color, they were always darker. Dominic said that he had seen him with gold eyes like the others but I had never seen it. Other than the warnings and the anger for no reason he was perfect, he was nice to me, he didn't let anyone make fun of me, he laughed at my jokes, he made me feel safe…… he was just like a big brother, the only problem with that was I didn't want a big brother, especially not from him.

My visions of ghost were getting worse, just like the little girl other ghost started to appeared next to me. The worst one I saw, I couldn't tell if it was a male or female, it was to bloody and chopped up. It looked as if an ax was taken to this person, and they really made sure that who ever it was, was dead. I was getting used to the Cullen's and Hale's changing forms in front of me. There was a definite change in my mood and posture, but I didn't close my eyes, just tried to look away mostly. My dreams they were what scared me the most, they weren't even of only Jasper any more, most of them were but not all. The dreams I had of Emmett, Edward, and Jasper were truly terrifying at times.

It was a boring Saturday and there was noting to do, the sun wasn't out today it was covered by the clouds. I had been outside earlier today and it was a bit cool out, nothing extreme but colder than usual. Flyleaf was playing softly in the background, Red Sam was playing, it this moment that song pretty much summed me up. My mom was down stairs doing something, I wasn't sure what it was really, but she was in the living room. Dominic was as earlier on the phone with Alice, he had never been one for phone conversations but now he could stay on for hours. I looked over at my wall, Jasper had given me the painting he made in art class and I hung it on my wall. My mother found the picture a bit twisted but I loved it. There was

a black vase with a pattern on it sitting on a table, in the vase were five daises one white an then they went up in color to a light red, and one black rose. The twisted part was the rose, it was taller that the other flowers and it seemed to be bleeding, the stem had streaks of blood on it and it looked like drops of blood were coming out of the petals. He told me that each flower represented a person, I asked if it was his family and he said that only one flower represented a family member. He said that the daises didn't work but the rose was the one, I asked who the rose was and he told me I had to figure that one out for my self.

My room was boring today, the gray from outside seemed to make my room gray as well. I looked at the small mirror I had on my nightstand, the stitches from my lip were gone but the scar was still there. My mother said I would have it a long time if not my whole life. I heard a knock on my door. "Who is it?" I asked stupidly, I knew it was Dominic, my mom never knocked.

"Its me dummy who else would it be?" I rolled my eyes as Dominic walked into my room. He plopped down in the chair I had sitting at my desk and looked around at the walls.

"What did Alice have something to do?" I asked him sitting up, that was the only reason they would get off the phone with each other, if they had something to do and they couldn't

talk while they did it.

"Yeah but she was really happy and I heard her call Jasper before she hung up." He shrugged looking at my picture. "Well is about as twisted as you." I stood up and walked over to him, I thought about pulling on his hair but then he would pull mine and it was fixed from this morning. So I just pushed him foreword and pulled my chair out from under him. He stood up and rubbed his back before picking me up, I hit him on the side if the head and he moved me around where I was flung over his shoulder.

"Put me down!" I yelled hitting him in the back hard. I felt him tense up for a second then he shook his head. If I hadn't been so small he wouldn't have been able to pick me up, but I was. He swung me around and I bit his shoulder as hard as I could, as he yelled and dropped me I smiled. My mother said that ever since I was little I lived to bite things, and my brother had always been the perfect target.

"You jerk!" he yelled and pulled the collar of his shirt off his arms to reveal very deep purple bite marks, I smiled showing my teeth. "I am telling mom!" even if there was another person here I would still get blamed for it. My mouth was very small, metaphorically speaking it was big but in real life very small. My teeth and mouth are the size of my nine year old cousins, I only wished my lips were to. As Dominic headed out my door I heard another knock down stairs but Dominic didn't care, company or not he was telling mom.. Baby. "Mom Joanna bit me!" I saw him pull his collar down again. "See?" I ran to his side and saw my mom standing with the door open and Alice Rosalie and Jasper in the door way.

"Oh hi." Dominic said putting his shirt back wining as his hand touched the spot, I was going to smile when I saw my mom's face.

"Joanna May McCarty, what have I told you about biting?" I looked down and looked at the others from the corner of my eye. Alice was looking at Dominic's shoulder, Rosalie was holding in a laugh and Jasper was looking at me. He knew I was looking at him, he shook his head and let a small smile on his breathtaking face. My mother rolled her eyes. "We will deal with this later she hissed." it seemed she had no problems punishing me in front of company. "What did you need?" she asked them.

"We wanted to know if it was okay to take Joanna and Dominic shopping today." Alice said smiling. Shopping? Was she serious, I didn't like shopping I hated it, I loathed it.

"Where would you go?" she asked looking at us.

"Huntsville." Jasper was the once who spoke this time. My mother looked like she was going to sake her head but Jasper interrupted. "It's the weekend, we would have them back by the end of today." he smirked in my direction, he was planning something. "I would really like it if you allowed Joanna to join us. I highly prefer her company above any one else's, and I would love it if she would keep me company." I knew he was doing something!

My mom looked speechless for a moment, then like she was just told the best thing in the world "Well I guess the two of you could go with them. Just have my babies home safe." My mom was such a sucker!

"I would never allow anything to hurt Joanna in the slightest." His stupid smile made me want to hit him, did he know what those little words would put in my mothers head? She smiled and handed us some money before she rushed us out the door. Alice Rosalie and Dominic were ahead of me and I wasn't sure were Jasper was.

"Why did you bite him?" He asked calmly from my side, I rolled my eyes.

"Why did you tell my mom that?" I asked harshly. After I said that I felt bad, why did I snap at him? He didn't do anything wrong.

"I'm sorry that upset you, I figured it was the best way to get her to allow you to join us." He froze. "And I wasn't lying when I told her I enjoyed your company over anyone else's." I looked up at him, he was looking up at the sky.

"I'm the one who should be sorry." I sighed. "That was probably the only thing that would have gotten her to allow it." He smiled a bit and I looked at Jasper's Hummer sitting in the driveway.

"I knew that would make you happy." He was smiling now, I could tell by the tone of his voice.

I nodded and smiled. "Jasper Hale you are truly the best." he laughed and grabbed my hand and walked me to the car. I opened the door and got in the passenger side.

"Hey Jojo!" I looked back at Emmett, he was in the sitting in the back with Rosalie. Alice and Dominic were in the middle seats and Jasper was driving…. Duh.

"Oh hey Emmett!" I said as I heard Jasper start the engine and I felt my heart rate start up and smiled. "I didn't know you were here!" I was pleasantly surprised at this fact.

"So…. Why did you decide to bite your brother?" Rosalie asked looking at Dominic, I let out a sadistic little giggle.

"I like biting people!" I said smiling, I felt Jasper's eyes on me. "Ever since I was little I liked to bite people, I use my teeth as a defense mechanism and Dominic was spinning me." I shrugged and looked back out the front window.

It didn't take long for us to get to Huntsville, with all the conversation and me looking at the car it went pretty fast. Every time I smiled it seemed like Jasper would smile as well, it could have been a trick of the eyes or wishful thinking. Emmett and I probably pissed Jasper off with the Major P.A thing but he never said anything or looked at me like he was angry, only Emmett. I asked, or Dominic asked, why Edward and Bella didn't join us and they had other plans. I knew they probably wanted time alone but I was hoping maybe I could get to be better friends with Bella. Alice and Dominic were in there own little conversation most of the time and Jasper seemed to be concentrating on driving most of the time. I mean if I asked him something he would tell me and if he felt a comment was needed. I was most stuck talking to Emmett and Rosalie, I wasn't complaining but I wanted to talk to Jasper.

"The mall is that way!" Alice directed smiling, as I heard her and Rosalie talking about clothes I thought about super powers. When I was little I knew what the perfect super power would be, and with recent events my old thought of my power came back. "You guys wanna know what the best superpower in the world would be?"

I heard Dominic groan from the back, I looked at him and stuck out my tongue. "What is it?" Emmett asked sounding relatively interested.

"It has been the same since she was five!" Dominic's voce was whiny. "Its not that interesting." I wanted to hit him but my arms were to short.

"Oh you don't even know what it is!" He didn't have a good memory so I didn't think he would know what it was.

"Then say what it is smart guy." I said shaking my head causing Jasper to laugh a bit.

"You think the most awesome power would be to control peoples emotions." He said as a matter of factly.

The others were quiet, all of them seeming to be looking at Jasper. "I hate you." I said turning around to the front as Emmett let out a big laugh.

"You told me to say it!" Dominic's whining voice filled my ears and I wanted it to stop.

'I didn't think you knew." I crossed my arms and pouted as I heard a light laugh from Jasper. "So I hate you."

"Were here!" Alice said clapping her hands. I could tell right away that I was in for something that I wouldn't like. Jasper found a parking spot in the back of the parking lot and we all got out.

"I don't want to walk the whole way!" I whined as I grabbed onto Dominic.

"Suck it up Jojo" Jasper glared at Emmett who had said that. Alice and Rosalie were tired of walking slow because they were way ahead of the rest of us talking.

I stuck out my tongue out at Emmett and then smiled and jumped on Dominic's back. "You now have to carry me!" I yelled as I saw Jasper smile at me.

"What if I drop you?" he asked playfully, as he skipped a bit.

I thought for a moment "Drop me and I will have Jasper beat you up." I winked at Jasper who smiled. "Right Jasper?"

"Oh yeah." he said smiling. "Remember she is mine, so don't drop her." Emmett let out a laugh and I bit the inside of my lip trying to stop myself from squealing. I did manage to hold in the squeal but I couldn't fight the big goofy smile that was on my face. As soon as we entered the mall Alice pulled me away from Dominic and dragged me away.

Never in my life had I been dragged around and dressed up as much as I had been with Alice and Rosalie. They took me to so many stores and made me try on and buy so many things, or actually they paid, much to my objection. Most of the things they bought me were dressy things I didn't like, but I still got a ton of things I did like. Alice enjoyed shopping more then any one I had ever meet, read about, or watched on t.v. If you let her lose in a store and never gave her a time to be gone, she would be there forever. I enjoyed the shopping but I didn't enjoy not seeing Jasper. I hadn't seen any of the guys since I was dragged away, I guessed they didn't want to see us try on all those clothes but I still wanted Jasper by.

At the moment I had been shoved in a dress and Alice said it was perfect for me so I was being forced to let them buy it for me. As I put the dress back on the hanger and walked out of the dressing room I was picked up in a big, cold, strong hug.

"I missed you Jojo!" Emmett still had put me down and was smiling at me.

I laughed. "Well I missed you to, in that short period of time!" Rosalie grabbed the dress and was walking to the register, I sighed and followed her.

"They forcing you to get it?" Emmett asked smirking down at me.

I stuck my tongue out at him. "Of course they are!" I yelled throwing up my arms. "They have bought me so many things, my closet isn't going to be able to hold all the junk they got me!" His laughter was making people stare, it could have been my yelling but I wanted it to me on Emmett.

"Well I'm sure you could keep some of it at our house, Alice has more than enough closet space!" I laughed with him, I was sure she did. In my mind her closet was bigger than her room.

I wanted to be nice but at the moment he was looking at him self in the mirror smiling, the opportunity was to high. "I'm not sure, your ego sure takes up a lot of space!" he looked hurt for a second then he pushed me a little to hard. Most of it was on me, I when Emmett shoved me a bit I tripped over my feet and hit my head quite hard on a wall. My face was so red as I heard Rosalie scolding Emmett, but I wasn't sure what she was saying. The pain in my head was so severe that I felt like I had a concussion.

"Are you ok!" Emmett's voice entered my mind as I was being stood up. I opened my eye and when my eyesight went back to the way it should be I saw Rosalie looking at me worried and flashing angry glances at Emmett. A few of the people in the store were looking a us as I was walked out of the store.

"I think so." I said weakly as I sat down. Rosalie sat next to me and smoothed the flat part of my hair.

"I'm so sorry Joanna!" Emmett said pulling his hair. "I should have known not to push you!"

"Emmett I am okay, you didn't do anything I tripped." I was rubbing my very sore forehead. "The only problem is I have a bad headache and you are talking loud." my head really felt like it was being torn in two. The noise around me was ear splitting, so many people were talking, walking, running, crying and laughing it was to much.

"Lets go outside." Rosalie said as Emmett helped me to my feet. When we got outside and the cold air hit me it was like I was knocked back into the right state of mind. My headache was now worse than before because I could concentrate on it. I sat on a bench next to Rosalie who just looked at me and I saw Emmett talking on the cell phone, I didn't know who it was but as soon as my name was mentioned Emmett held the phone away from his ear as who ever it was proceeded to tell at him.

As he hung up the phone and looked at Rosalie and I. "Well Jasper is coming." He looked away. Jasper was the one yelling at him? Why was he yelling at Emmett, I was the one who tripped.

"Emmett Cullen!" My head snapped back at the sound of Jasper's angry yell. "How the hell could you be so stupid?" Jasper was obviously furious about Emmett hurting me, and I was taken back.

"I didn't mean to, it was an accident!" Emmett looked strangely small against an angry Jasper.

"One hell of an accident Emmett!" as Jasper grabbed Emmett's shirt and jerked him forewords the evil vampire came back but I didn't say anything afraid that he would turn around and look at her. Rosalie had risen to her feet and was watching them carefully. "You know how bad she could have been hurt?" He roared shaking Emmett hard.

"Jasper stop it!" I yelled standing up sending a pain through my head. I didn't care Jasper was shaking Emmett to hard and he was furious. Rosalie turned around and looked at me as Jasper let go of Emmett who backed up immediately. "It was an accident!" my voice was quiet now "And your scaring me." for some reason I was afraid Jasper was mad at me. I closed my eyes and touched my head, the headache was worse due to my yelling. As I opened my eyes I was looking at Jasper's chest.

"I'm sorry I scared you." his voice was sad and quiet. "Never in my life would I mean to do that." I felt him run his fingers lightly from my chin to my forehead, the pain disappearing as he did so. "The thought of you hurt mad me angry, I'm not going to let any one hurt you." I looked at him, he wasn't smiling but in his eyes I could see four emotions above all others, Concern, affection, happiness, and satisfaction.

"But Emmett didn't hurt me." I whispered as I nearly felt my heart stop when Jasper ran his thumb over my bottom lip. My lip was trembling a bit and now he was smiling, his other hand was now on my face as well, moving along my lips with his other. His eyes held even more satisfaction as his hands moved gently over my face. I fought back the urge to close my eyes, afraid he would disappear. Things like this only happened in my dreams, in real life Jasper only saw me as a sister, or so I thought.

I heard Jasper laugh a bit. "Its amazing." he stoked my cheek. "I hear your voice and I'm calm, that's one of the things you didn't know you were good at." I nodded as he grabbed my hand. "However just one of the many things." he pointed out.

"Are there a lot?" I asked breathlessly, he looked at me like I had said a bad word.

"There are so many things!" he was leaning down to look me in the eyes. "There isn't enough time in the world." he stroked my face again. I hadn't noticed it before but Emmett and Rosalie had left. "I think they wanted to give us some privacy." he paused. "Or Emmett wanted to get away from me." he looked ashamed and I didn't like that.

"I'm sure it was the first one." I said happily, hoping that it was. He stood up straight and smiled down at me.

"We were pretty close weren't we?" he asked as I felt my face heat up. He grabbed my hand and pulled me back in the mall. I didn't mind being dragged around, or at least not by Jasper. He looked so happy now, and I loved it. He dragged me into the only sore I hadn't been to, the jewelry store that I had never been in, everything was way to much money.

"What are we doing in here?" I asked looking up at him.

He shrugged and looked around. "Just want to look around a bit, you know see what's here." his voice was casual but it held something suspicious. I shrugged it off and went to looking around when I found the most perfect necklace in the world.

"Oh that is lovely, it's a Harry Winston's diamond wreath necklace features 128 round, pear shaped, marquise diamonds totalling117,03 carats in a Platinum setting." the sales woman said smiling at me. I stepped away from the counter, there was no way I would ever be able to get that. I didn't even want to contemplate the cost.

"What?" Jasper asked placing a hand on my shoulder.

"Never in a million years would I be able to get that!" I said mad at my self for looking at anything in here. "I'm going to go to the bathroom." I said just wanting to et away from the look I was getting from the lady at the counter. When I was in the restroom I shook my head and laughed at my self, why did I look at it! Then the look she gave me, like I didn't belong there! I doubt she could afford that necklace ether, no one could get that thing. Just as I walked out of the bathroom Alice, Rosalie, Emmett and Dominic were waiting for me.

"Hey, lets go!" Alice said smiling big, she pulled Dominic by the hand, and he seemed to be enjoying being pulled around as I was.

"Have fun with Jasper?" Emmett asked smiling don at me. I rolled my eyes but felt my face grow red. "I'll take that as a yes!" he walked ahead of me for some reason then I saw his grab the shoulder of a blonde guy, it didn't take long to figure out it was Jasper. I kept in the back of the group and thought about the day, it was practically the best day of my life, more Jasper would have been better, but with what happened today, it was all fine. As we reached the car Jasper held the door open for me. I felt my face heat up as he placed his hands on my waist and lifted me into the car. I kept quiet as we drove home, just looking out the window, it wasn't even dark yet. It was about maybe 6:30 and very cloudy, but it looked pretty for some reason.

I was so lost in my own thoughts that I didn't notice that we had stopped until I heard the door open and close. Dominic had gotten out of the car and was walking towards the house. "OH!" I said sitting up straight. "Thanks so much for taking me today." I was really happy that I had gone.

"It was no problem!" Alice piped up, she was simply happy.

"Yeah, next time we can go look at the car parts store!" Rosalie said even more excited about that then she had been about the clothes. I got out of the car and got the rest of my things which was only one bag thanks to my brother. "See you Jojo!" Emmett yelled before I had closed the back door. I forced a smile on my face, Jasper didn't tell me bye. I guess after what happened earlier he would have at least told me bye. I heard the car door open then close then Jasper drove off.

"Joanna." I turned around and looked at Jasper confused. He was still here but the others left, why? "I can walk home, its no big deal." he answered my unasked question.

I nodded. "Okay, what do you want?" I asked as his smile grew and he grabbed my hand.

"I have a surprise for you." his face showed nothing but happiness as he reached into his pocket.

"You didn't…" my words and my heart nearly stopped as Jasper pulled out a jewelry box. "Please say that not what I think it is." my voice was shaking, he couldn't have bought that for me, I caught a glimpse of the price… way to much.

"I can't." he said as he opened it and the diamonds glittered. I put my shaking hand over my mouth. I bit my lip as tears fell from my eyes. "Why are you crying!" he asked scared "I thought you wanted it!"

"You have to take it back." my voice was shaky, Jasper actually got that for me. "I'm not worth it!" I managed to choke out.

He smiled "I know." he grabbed my face softly. "Your worth so much more." I could help my self, with out thinking I threw my arms around his cold shoulders. His body was tense for a moment and I almost let go when he wrapped his arms around me.

"You shouldn't have done that!" I said my voice muffled as my mouth was pressed against his shoulder.

"You wanted it." He countered as he let me go.

I scoffed. "I want a lot of things, but I never get them Jasper!" I whined to him as I wiped the remaining tears from my face. "People don't get all of the things they want!"

He smiled and ran his hand down my face. "You should get any little insignificant thing you want." I smiled at him and let him move his hand across my face. He walked behind me and quickly he had placed the necklace around my neck. I felt tears coming back as he moved around to face me again. "So beautiful." he muttered smiling.

"I can't believe you got me this." I whispered, he looked down at me and wiped a tear from my face. And looked upset again. "But I love it. " I lifted it up and looked at it. "No one has ever given me something like this." I smiled up at him and he smiled back.

"I'm surprised." I looked at him confused. "It surprises me that I can give you this with out messing with someone else's girl."

I scoffed loudly and he looked at me clearly shocked. "Okay, that's just stupid." that made me angry. "Don't lie like that Jasper, I can deal with you getting this and I can even deal with your fake statement of beauty, but don't mess around like that! I have never had a boyfriend and no guy other than you has said anything about me a beauty so I know it's a lie." I yelled as I turned to walk away when I felt his hand grab my wrist.

"Joanna McCarty." He was angry, and his voice stopped me more than anything, he had the most gorgeous southern accent and the anger in it made it even more desirable. "Why the hell would I lie about that! I have made no fake statement to you and I will be damned if I let you think that!" he had turned me around and had me closer to his face than I had ever been, his hands held my wrists together tightly. His black eyes and expression sent rush of fear down my spine, as well as a strange excitement …. And frankly it was turning me on a bit. "I shouldn't be telling you this but I could never lie to you, I care about you to much to lie about that!" I felt a sting of regret. "If I didn't care about you, you wouldn't be alive!"

That was the truth, he was dangerous and if he didn't care for me ….. He would have killed me "Why?" I asked as his grip on my wrists loosened. "Why would you kill me if you didn't care! What would make you do that!" he let me go.

"I have already told you to much I have to go." he said as he started to walk off.

"Jasper I'm sorry I won't ask why!" I cried not wanting him to leave me. He was quickly in front of me again, he ran his fingers over my lips then hugged me.

"Its not what you think Joanna." I felt his lips against my hair "I have something really important that I need to do so I don't hurt you." he pulled away and touched my necklace. "I will se you tomorrow, I swear." he walked away and I watched his every step. As soon as he was out of my vision I grabbed my necklace and walked in the house.

"Hey sis I put your things in your room." Dominic said as I walked in the kitchen on the way to my room. He was getting a glass of water when he turned around and his eyes got big, I knew what he was looking at. "Whoa, where the hell did you get that?" He asked setting down his glass.

"Jasper gave it to me." I said barely loud enough for him to hear as I walked into my room and laid down on my bed. That night my dreams were of Jasper, not of the monster in my previous ones but he was shinning in the sun, his body sparkled like millions of diamonds placed together and he was beautiful.

**Dominic's P.O.V**

After going over my sisters relationship with Jasper in my head I had laid down. She thought he only saw her as a friend but he was dead wrong. To another guy it was clear that Jasper was interested in my sister as more than a friend. I had tried to tell her about that but she only said how Alice liked me. I wished that she was right but I wasn't that lucky. Alice was the image of perfection kind, smart, unbelievably gorgeous, accepting, quirky, she seemed to always have a glow around her. But I was only her friend and as much as I wished it was more, it was only a wish.

I woke up and looked around my room and I saw the clock, 4:13. I almost went back to be when I saw my computer and nearly jumped out of bed. It was Sunday and I had a huge project on the Civil War due Monday and I hadn't started on it yet. I tuned on my computer and started the internet browser, in the search bar I typed in Civil War and tried to think of a project that my sister hadn't done yet. She had done most of the available projects, she hadn't done one on the oldest and youngest officers yet, that was my project! I took out a notebook and wrote down notes on that I found.

As I looked at the youngest officers for the confederacy and one name stood out to me. The youngest officer was named Jasper Whitlock. The stupid idea of vampires came back to me, vampires never died and it was to much of a coincidence that a suspected vampire was named Jasper and his middle name was Whitlock. They had a link to his picture and my curiosity got the better of me. When I clicked on the link I almost fell out of my chair, Jasper Whitlock was a mirror image of Jasper Whitlock Hale.


	10. He likes me back

**Yay!! It seems like a lot of people liked my last chapter I am so happy that so many people like it! Well here is this chapter I hope its liked as well! Sorry for the wait, it would be longer but… I felt like you guys really needed an update!**

My wonderful dream of Jasper was completely ruined by the sound of Dominic's voice yelling my name. "Joanna you have to come see this!" he was shaking me, I hit his hand and turned around to go back to sleep. "No wake up now!" he shook me harder. I sat up in bed and looked at the clock. 6:53.

"What the hell is so important it couldn't wait till morning?" I asked angrily as he pulled on my hand. He dragged me into the hall way and was pulling me to his room.

"It's a picture, I found it when I was doing my research for the Civil war." I pulled my hand away from his, he was completely nuts!

"I know I told you I like History but this is overboard, let me go back to sleep." I hated him at that moment, I couldn't believe he woke me up to show me a picture of a solider!

"No Joanna you want to see this I swear." If this wasn't good I was going to hurt him. He led me into his room and sat down at his computer desk. "Look at that name." his mouse was on the name of the youngest Confederate officer, Jasper Whitlock. I looked at Dominic, why was he showing me this, was it because his name was Jasper? He put his mouse on the link to see his picture, he looked at me then clicked it.

"Oh my God" My vice was no more than a whisper, this Jasper Whitlock man looked exactly like Jasper. It was a perfect copy, not mater how you looked at the picture there were no differences in them. My first thought was a relieve but no one could look that much alike, it wasn't possible, even for twins. I ran my hand through my hair and looked at Dominic. "What the hell, you had to have done that!" he shook his head, I didn't know why I said he did it.

"How would I have done this?" He asked loudly, I knew he couldn't have done that. I sat on his bed and thought. Was the thought of vampires truly that observed? Some one from the 1800's looked like Jasper to a scary extent, his eyes changed color when he was angry, maybe when he was hungry. He told me he would have killed me if he didn't care, a vampire would do that. But in all movies I had seen vampires were soulless evil creatures incapable of love, however those were just movies and this was real life.

"This is the real world, vampires are not real!" I said out loud as Dominic looked at me then to the picture.

"What if they were real, and what if they were actually all vampires." I looked at him, how would I react, I knew that I wouldn't treat most of them different…. But what about Jasper? Would I still like him if he was a blood sucking vampire? He had told me and proven that he would hurt me… that should have made my answer no but if he was a vampire and he cared enough to not kill me then it made me like him even more. I looked at the picture, he was just as beautiful as Jasper was now, but I wasn't sure that was Jasper at all. I mean it could be a relative. Just as my mood fell my cell phone went off , I looked at my phone, Jasper. I looked at Dominic and answered my phone.

"_Hello?" _I tried to make my voice sound steady.

"_Are you ok? You sound a bit off." _

"_Oh no nothings wrong, I'm just wondering something." _I bit the inside of my lip.

"_Oh, ok, what is it?" _How was I going to ask him? Was I just suppose to come out and ask if he was a vampire?

"_Um, have you ever heard of someone called Jasper Whitlock?" _There was no answer just silence. _"He was a confederate solider and…" _

"_I've never heard of him." _I knew him well enough to tell when he was laying and now was one of those times.

"_Jasper you don't need to lie to me! I know you Jasper!"_

"_Do you really?" _I looked down avoiding my brothers questioning gaze.

"_I want to, Jasper, you don't have to hide anything from me!"_

_"I told you I'm not hiding anything!" _his voice was more of a low growl than anything else and it scared me. I quickly closed my phone and walked back to my room.

I knew he was lying to me! I told him he was and all he can do is get angry! Jasper didn't have to lie to me, I thought he trusted me but I was obviously wrong. The thought didn't make me angry only upset, I tried to be angry but it wasn't working. Why didn't he trust me, I didn't ask if he was Jasper Whitlock, only if he had heard of him. Why did he get so angry with me to! I didn't like it when he was angry, all I could picture were his angry black eyes.

Dominic obviously got the message that I didn't want to see anyone because he hadn't been to bug me, or ask questions. I simply laid on my bed dozed off, but not for long. I felt weight on the foot of my bed and kicked thinking it was Dominic, but it was to hard to be Dominic. I kicked again and my foot hurt from the force. I opened my eyes and sat up rubbing my foot.

"I had to come, I didn't like how I made you feel." My head snapped up at the sound of Jasper's voice. He wasn't looking at me, his eyes were looking all around my room but not at me. "I have never actually been in here, even when I come by, I've thought about it but never really done it." I looked at him, what was he talking about? When did he come bye, was he talking about when he visited. "Your right you know, I shouldn't have to hide anything from you. My family gave me the okay, and encouraged me as well." he sounded depressed but I didn't think he really was. He looked at me then emotions overcame me anger, sadness, love, lust, annoyance, happiness, numb, hated, confusion, fear and many more. "Do you feel that?" he asked grabbing my hand with his ice cold one. I couldn't speak I just nodded, "I'm doing it, I have been all along." I looked at him with wide eyes, I knew he was doing it. "And its because I'm…" "A vampire" I interrupted with a breathless voice. He pulled his hand away from mine and was in the corner of my room in less than a second. I wanted to talk to him but I had to posses this in my head. Jasper was a vampire, and so were all of the others, they were all murderers. I know I said it didn't matter before but was that the truth now? Could I still be friends with murderers?

"What are you thinking?" he knew what I was feeling and that cause a bit of urgency in his voice. I looked down at my hands, could I say that out loud?

"I… I don't know…" he looked at me curiously, "If I could be friends with murders" my voice was quiet but I knew he heard me by the look on his face.

"I am murder yes!" he was angry now, he was making me feel it. "I am a ruthless killer! But the rest of my family is not!" I flinched as his voice echoed through out my room. "All of us but Carlisle and Bella have killed humans but the others all have changed! Edward fell in love with Bella as a human and he didn't kill her and Rosalie only killed the monsters that raped her, she hasn't had human blood!" I looked at him in shock. 'The others are still better than I am, they are no where near the murders I am!" He closed his eyes and leaned against the wall.

"I… I'm sorry." I felt tears come from my eyes as I felt his weight back on my bed, I opened my eyes and he was sitting on the edge of my bed as far away from me as he could be, which made my cry more. He hated me now.

"Don't cry." I shook my head as a wave of calmness filled me.

"Stop it!" I yelled, "Let me be upset! You don't even like me anymore why are you trying to make me happy?!" He grabbed my arm tightly and I winced as he pulled me up to his face.

'What the hell gave you that idea!" his eyes were pitch black and was dangling in the air, causing my fear level to rise. "I care about you more than I have cared about anyone before! I'll be damned if you sit there and say I don't! I have worked to hard for you to even half way think that!" his voice was softer at the end and almost all of my fear was gone but soon it was replaced bye pain. His grip on my arm was almost bone crushing, he didn't seem to notice until he let me go with a scared look on his face as I fell on to the bed. He ran to the corner of the room again but this time he looked like I had never seen him before, truly terrified. "I'm sorry!" he cried out. "I'm so, so sorry!"

"Its ok!" I said looking at my arm, a bruise was already forming but I was more worried about him. "Bruises will go away and so will pain." he ran his hand through his hair and looked at me. "Vampire strength hu?" I asked cracking a smile, he looked at me and walked over to me and grabbed my arm gently running his cool fingers over the bruise, he nodded in response to my question. "What else is there?" I asked quietly as he continued to rub my arm.

"We can run extremely fast, we are quiet, don't have to breath, we can see things better than anyone else, our smell is great and I can fell and change the emotions of those around me." he looked at me as I started at him. "I can feel yours everywhere I am, no matter how far I've gone I can feel you." I smiled as he moved a strand of hair out of my face. "I like that, it keeps me from worrying a small bit." I looked at him as he traced his fingers over my lips. "You don't mind me touching you, now that you know I mean." He looked at me truly afraid of my answer.

I looked at him and slowly grabbed his hand. "I always knew." I rubs my fingers over his smooth palm. "My dreams told me all I needed to know, I tried to say they were wrong but they are never wrong." I looked at him "And I love it when you touch me." I felt my face heat up but it stopped when he stood up laughing.

"How could I do this to you?" He was mad at him self and I didn't quite understand why. "I know I did something to make you feel that way and I meant to do it in away!" I looked at him confused. "I was debating for a while, if I should just tell you how I feel or if I should leave and never comeback!" I sat up straight.

"You can't leave!" I said a little to loud. "Just tell me how you feel and forget leaving!" I felt the tears coming to my eyes.

"Don't cry, I can't stand it when you cry." his hands were at his sides and he looked at me. "Leaving would be safer for you, so much safer." he sat next to me in an instant. "But telling you would make me happier, and it would be easer." he grabbed my hand lightly and kissed it lightly causing my face to burn intensely. "You are my warmth." he presses my warm hand to his ice cold cheek. "All night I think of you, good thoughts as well as a few bad ones. I can't sleep at all so when I can I come here, I've never actually trusted myself in here with you. I only did tonight because I scared you, I've told you I can't handle that. I know I should want you scared but I care about you to much for that." I smiled as he ran my fingers over his lips. His eyes were on his picture of the roses.

"What?" I asked him looking at them as well, he turned to me and smiled.

"Remember when I told you that the rose was the one that worked?" he asked quietly with the small smiled still on his face. I nodded as he looked back at the picture, "You are the Rose Joanna." I looked at Jasper and shook my head, he was lying to, there was no way he felt the same. "I would never lie to you." he could feel my emotions. "When I would talk about the person I liked, it was always you."

I looked down, my face was redder than ever before. I could feel his eyes still watching me as I felt the tears come to my face. "If this is your way of a sick joke Jasper stop it now!" there was no point in hiding anything now so I le all of it out. "I don't care what you are, I don't care what you've done, but I have always liked you, and if this is a joke…" before I could answer jaspers hands held my face a bit close to his.

"I would never tell you if it was a lie, if I didn't trust you with my secrete 100 I would have never told you! Joanna, over a hundred years of life and you are the only person I have had more than a physical connection to!" I nodded then realized what he said, over a hundred years old. He mused have sensed my curiosity because he pulled away and looked at me.

"How old are you?" I asked, I didn't mean to sound judgmental or anything but it seemed like he thought I did. Jasper stood up and looked down at me, "I was born Jasper Whitlock in 1843." I was taken aback a bit, but I smiled as I realized something.

"You were an actual confederate solider." I said in awe "You were there! You could tell me how it actually went down! Wait what rank were you?" I asked, I knew he was some kind of officer but what, I wasn't sure.

"Major." his voice held an amusement that if I wasn't so wrapped up in my own fantasy world I might have cared.

"Oh wow that so cool!" I said smiling big and squirming around. He sat next to me and rubbed my face.

"You find out I'm a vampire and I get more emotion when you find out I was a rebel solider." he laughed and smiled at me. "You should sleep little one." he stood up and I grabbed his hand I wasn't ready for him to leave yet. "Oh don't worry I will be back when you wake up." he smiled as I reluctantly let go of his hand.

He smirked as he opened my window and did one of those action movie jumps out of it. I laughed "Show off!" I could hear his laughter fade as he got further away from my house.

As soon as I was sure he was gone I ran into Dominic's room. He was sitting on his bed looking out the window when I jumped on his bed. "Guess what!?" I asked excitedly.

"There vampires?" He asked looking down at me. He was happy, but not as happy as I was. I didn't know why I was so happy, but I was, sure it was a little weird, but so was I.

"No! Well that to but no not what I was talking about!" It really wasn't, I mean at times I did that to him when he guessed right but not this time.

"What are you talking about then?" he asked interested, I smiled big and looked at his ceiling.

"Jasper likes me!" I yelled and looked at Dominic. "He said I'm his bloody rose!" I was so happy at the moment and I didn't have to hide it.

"Your happy you're his bloody rose?" Dominic's voice was questioning my sanity, no doubt.

"Well, he said that I was the one that works so maybe he more than just likes me." I said quietly with a shrug. I wanted it to be true but when I thought of the two of us tighter I could hardly believe he even liked me.

"I think so, but I couldn't even tell that Alice liked me, even with you telling me so." He looked down and I sat up and hugged him.

"No its ok, I mean a lot of guys don't see it." I smiled at him. "Girls are just good at things like that." he turned to me and smiled.

"You were right though." I looked at his smiling face. "She really, really likes me." I hugged him tight. "I have a girlfriend for the first time in my life." he threw himself back and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Oh calm your self Romeo!" I yelled laughing at my brother, I liked this. Dominic was happier than I had seen him in a long time, I owed Alice big.

He took a deep breath and propped himself up on his elbows, "Do you think Jasper is your boyfriend now?" he was still smiling but mine faded.

What was he to me? I know I wanted him to be my boyfriend, but did he want to be? "I don't know." I said with a shrug. All that was clear to me was that they were vampires and that Jasper liked me. "I would love for him to be but I just don't know." I let my mood get down, as well as Dominic's. I didn't really like that.

"Hey well at least you know he likes you!" I nodded as my smile came back. "That's something right!"

"Yeah, it's a lot more than I had before!" I said happily. I laid down next to him and looked at the clock, 3:25. Automatically upon seeing the time I yawned, I was always one for staying up late but I was woken up twice so I was really tired.

"You should go to sleep Joanna." Dominic said smiling at me, I hugged my big brother and sat up pulling him with me. "Stronger than any one thinks." he said smirking.

"I am!" I laughed as I walked out of his room smiling. As I closed my door and laid on my bed I thought about tonight. So much had gone on today, and the bad things led to the greatest thing of all, Jasper saying he liked me. He may not be my boyfriend but he was something. All I knew was I was in love with a vampire, and he liked me back.

**OK there is is!! Now the real struggles begin! The next chapter of this won't be out until I have the second chapter of "Her Blood is Chocolate" out! If you haven't checked it out you should! Its Jasper side of this story!!**


	11. I love you

**OK I know I told you that this story wouldn't be out till I got the next chapter of HBIC was out but you see.. I lost all of that story! And I am sorry for the wait but things got a little hectic! I hope you guys love it !!**

My mind was a storm, even in my sleep so many thought swirled around in a whirlwind of thoughts. It wasn't all bad thoughts, some were good but many were confusing. How was it that the Cullen's were vampires, they were the undead, my Jasper was a vampire. One thing that went through my mind many times was, why me? It seemed like Dominic and I were the only humans they really associated with, and Jasper really only talked to me. Was it only because he wanted to eat me… at times I am sure that was the only thing that kept him talking to me. As much as I desperately wanted to believe he didn't want me for my blood, but I knew that at least a part of him did.

As my mind wondered it went to the dark side, my mind kept telling me that Jasper only wanted me for my blood. I was fighting it but it kept saying that he was only interested in me for that. My heart was pumping faster and I couldn't calm myself no matter what I tried. Suddenly my heart went back to normal and everything was fine, I smiled to myself.

"Its okay." My eyes snapped open at the sound of that voice. "I told you I would be here when you woke up." the sound of Jasper's voice made me smile. It was like this was proof that last night was real.

I sat up in bed and smiled, he was there, my vampire was here for me. "You came back." my voice was breathless. I couldn't believe it, my Jasper was here, for me. I felt my face heat up and I saw him straighten up a bit, that opened up a whole new set of questions.

"You're a bit surprised." he said quietly. His voice was musical and it put me in a daze, "Joanna?" my eyes snapped open and I looked at him blushing once more. "You have no idea how that affects me." his voice was almost a growl and I backed up a bit.

"Why does it affect you." I asked quietly, not wanting to make to much noise. In less than a second he was sitting in front of me on my bed.

"La Tuna Canate" I looked at him confused, what did he mean. "You are my singer Joanna, your blood calls to me. Never have I meet any one who's blood was more appealing, Chocolate is your flavor." he shook his head. "You've seen my past and as you can imagine me finding my singer isn't a very good thing." I looked at him with wide eyes. "I am more harmful to you than any one else in the world." he said looking at me with a hallow look in his eyes.

I shook my head, "I don't care Jasper." I meant every word, "I don't care about any of that! I only care about you! I want you to see that, nothing you could ever tell me would make me leave you!"

Jasper looked at me, I could read his expression, "Joanna I have waited so long for you." he looked away. "But I could hurt you, much more than the others, there has been so many times have almost killed you. Joanna I want you for your blood at times."

"Which do you want more, me" I paused, "Or my blood?" I wasn't sure I wanted the answer. I knew it might be one that I wouldn't like but I had to know.

"Joanna, you are more than I could ever ask for, and so much more than I deserve. Your blood does sing to me yes, but I have always wanted both. Never one more than the other, the first time I met you was the only exception." He looked down, I grabbed his hand which he had laying on the bed.

"What did you think when you first saw me, and don't be afraid of scaring me." I wanted to know this, I don't really know exactly why but I did.

He sighed and looked out the window, his brow furred and he looked back at me. His grip on my hand tightened a bit, "The only thing I thought about was drinking your blood. At that time nothing else mattered to me. Edward was able to handle it with Bella but I have no idea how he remained so calm, and not to have made a scene." I looked at him confused, he laughed a bit and smiled. "Bella was Edwards singer, but they fell in love, he wanted her blood as bad as I want yours but he was able to control him self on a level that I could never posses."

"So Bella was a human when you met her?" he nodded. "Why is she a vampire now?" he straightened and all traces of happiness were gone from his face. "What, is it that bad?"

He shook his head no, "There is a coven that is… in a way the leaders of our kind. Ruthless when it comes to the rules, Edward was trying to get him self killed when they met Bella. The Volturi, that what they are called, only want vampires with talents like I have. Bella has a power to and Aro, the leader, could see that. They demanded that she be changed or she would be killed." I thought for a moment then remembered a dream I had.

"Are they the ones Maria was talking about that killed the vampires at war?" His look sent shivers down my spine, anger flooded his face and fear filled my heart.

"How do you know about her!?" he growled as his grip on my hand was bone crushing.

"My dreams!" I managed to choke out as I gasped in pain. I head a few cracking noises as my fingers broke in his iron grip. His teeth were bared and his eyes were back smothering me in his own anger I felt weak and helpless and for the second time in my life I saw the most beautiful man in the world as a monster. "Let go, please" I whimpered as more snaps were heard.

Faster than I could think he was against the wall wide eyes looking at me. He was no longer a monster, more of a scared little boy. "Joanna..." he began as I tried to hold in my pain. The look in his eyes was enough to make me forgive him, pain and hurt. He never meant to hurt me, he just got a little rough sometimes, and every time he did this he was hurting himself more than me. His look was one of pure regret, I wanted to go to him and prove that I was ok, but I wasn't ok. My hand was broken in several places and it hurt more than anything I had ever felt. "I'm so sorry." he said quietly as he put his head in his hands.

I stood up and walked over to him, ignoring the pain in my hand, I didn't want him to feel so bad. "Jasper." I said putting my good hand on his arm.

"Don't let me touch you!" he looked at me and moved away, at first I was upset but then I let what he said sink in. He was afraid that he would hurt me if he touched me.

"Jasper stop it! It was an accident!" I said, I wasn't going to let him think that he couldn't touch me.

"What if it wasn't an accident?" he asked me looking away from me.

With my good hand I reached out and grabbed his face and surprisingly he didn't move away, "I know it was Jasper, please don't do this." he looked at me as I rubbed is ice cold cheek.

He reached don and grabbed my hurt hand very gently, it almost felt as if he wasn't touching me. He pressed his lips to every place it hurt and for some strange reason, it soothed my pain. His eyes stared straight into mine and he closed them for a moment, "You need to get your hand fixed and there is only one person I trust with you." his voice was dead, when suddenly a wave of an emotion like excitement and fear hit me as a small smirk hit jasper's face. "How do you feel about meeting a coven of vampires in there tomb?"

I looked at him confused for a moment then it hit me, "You want to take me to your house." he nodded and looked at my face carefully. Jasper thought that now that I knew what his family was I wouldn't want to be around them. "Everyone is the same Jasper, I'm not afraid of seeing them." I said truthfully. Jasper let a small smile spread across his face and stood straight.

"I have to carry you." I felt my face heat up at the mere thought of having jasper carry me. "he let an even bigger smile come to his face and his dead voice lightened a bit. "Embarrassment, it's a thrilling emotion coming from you." he said as he picked me up bridal style.

As he jumped out the window I got a brief glimpse of how this was going to be, and I loved it. He looked down at me as he lightly landed on the ground, he shook his head as he looked at my hand then took off. My heart pounded in my chest as Jasper glided along the earth, it seemed that he never touched the earth. Flying, was the only way to describe this feeling. I had always loved going fast, it was my only way of feeling free. This was in a way the most free I had ever felt, even with Jasper's iron grip holding me to his chest.

It didn't take long to get to the Cullen House, and it was… big. It was an old plantation house as ours was but a lot bigger. As I looked around it looked as if it was really from the 1800's even with the clear renovations. Eight columns were in the front of the house and the porch was made of some kind of wood. The doors were high and with the original pattern of the 1800's, the glass was clearly new but it seemed to fit in perfectly with the rest of the house. The white color was most likely the exact same color the house originally held. As I looked a little behind the house I saw another building. A huge garage it seemed to be but from here I couldn't tell.

"You like it." he stated. It wasn't a question Jasper could tell I did.

"It looks so much like it should, not many people keep these houses as close to the original as they should." I said looking at him, "I have never been here before. Most places around here I have been to but not here."

Jasper nodded as he grabbed my hand and led me on the porch, "That's why we chose it here. We like our homes away from people so we can be ourselves and not have to worry about being caught." he looked at me as his hand was on the door knob. "You ready?" he asked.

"Of course." I was sure that I was ok to go in but for the first time a small flick of fear ran through me as he opened the door to his home. As we walked in I was in awe, the high ceiling, the floors and walls were perfect. This had to be the most beautiful home I had ever seen.

"Esme did it." Jasper's voice said interrupting my thoughts as he stared at me trying read my face. "She always does our houses." his words were quiet and I could barely hear them.

"Joanna?" a voice said behind me, I turned to face Esme. I had only seen the Cullen mother a few times before and I was a bit nervous as the look on her face was a bit weary. "How are you?" her voice was surprised but she did well to hide it.

"I told her Esme." Jasper said looking away from his mother, "I had to do it." My hand sent a spike of pain up my arm and I let out a small whimper. Esme's eyes flashed to me full of concern and suspicion, "What did you do Jasper?" she asked calmly however knowing.

I didn't want Jasper to feel any worse so I took the spotlight, "I said some upsetting things about someone and he accidentally held my hand to tight." Esme's face was surprised at first but soon it changed and she smiled and nodded.

"Jasper sometimes does forget how strong he really is." Esme put her hand on my back leading me upstairs. "Carlisle is this way sweetheart." From what I knew of Esme she was an extremely nice person but the more I knew her as hard as it seemed she grew nicer. Jasper stayed in the living room, I think he was avoiding seeing Carlisle.

"Why didn't Jasper come?" I wanted to know his real reason for not going with me.

"He is afraid that Carlisle will be disappointed in him, as he always does." She said shaking her head. I was right but it seemed to me that Jasper made a lot of mistakes. "He never is, but Jasper thinks he messes up to often." I nodded. I wasn't sure what to say I know I was curious about something but asking was another story. I wanted to know what happened to Esme, why was she here?

Esme led me up to the second floor and opened the door of a room, "I will be right back, you can look around if you want." She said smiling as she went in to the room. I was guessing that Esme wanted to explain things to Carlisle, I hoped so. I took Esme's advice and walked down the hall. There were so many pictures, I was guessing things from the others human times. I could tell the years of something's, most were from the early 1900's a few of them where older, but they were all history. I imagined the different times the Cullen's could have all been from and a spark of excitement hit me. All the different things I could find if I was able to look all around their home thrilled me.

"Joanna, could you come in here?" I recognized Dr. Cullen's voice immediately. I turned to face the stunningly beautiful Doctor. Jasper was by far the best looking person but Dr. Cullen came closer than any others… maybe I just like blondes. I followed him into the room and sat in a chair across from the desk placed in the center of the room. Books and pictures were all over the room, I guessed this was Carlisle's study. He walked over to a cabinet and started rummaging through it. "Esme told me about your hand, I apologize for that." He grabbed a first-aid kit and sat it on his desk. I had broken things before so I knew what I needed to do. I held my hand out to him and he started to push around on my hand, "He could have crushed it which I am surprised he didn't." he looked at me for a moment. "If you don't mind me asking, why did he do this?" I looked at my hand and sighed.

"I brought up someone from my dreams, Maria." He nodded and reached in his bag and pulled out some kind of tape. "It seems he doesn't really like her." I said laughing a bit to lighten the mood.

"No he is not, he probably is on worse terms with her than any one." He said putting the tape tightly on my hand.

"I guessed that when he almost crushed my hand." I wasn't really sure what to say to him. "So you know about what we are, I know it must be a lot to take in." I took a breath and looked at the pictures on his wall.

"Not really I have suspected it for a while actually, I just never let myself accept it until he told me." Carlisle nodded and looked in his bag for something else.

"Jasper, is the newest member to our family, things are a bit hard for him. Being around humans strain him and your blood is like a drug to him. He tries to keep himself in control but he does slip up every now and then." I didn't say anything to that, I really didn't know what to say to that. I knew Jasper was dangerous but he was more dangerous than the others?

"I trust him, it may seem stupid but I do." I said quietly, I didn't really know how Carlisle was going to take it.

"I know you do, I'm not saying that's a bad thing I was simply letting you know." he said looking at me from across the desk. I looked down a little upset with myself, I looked back at the paintings trying to distract myself from the pain. "Your all done." I looked at my hand and he smiled.

His smile all to quickly faded as Emmett's yell was heard down stairs, I looked at him and then to the door which he was at in an instant. It took me by surprise for a second but I soon recovered and was out the door behind Carlisle. I walked down the stairs quietly and stopped when I could see everything that was going on with out being seen myself. Edward, Bella, Alice and Esme were beside the door, Rosalie was alone wither her back to me and Carlisle was in the middle. Emmett had Jasper against the wall and Jasper was glaring at him with his teeth bared, I was sure Emmett looked the same but I couldn't see his face. Jasper looked terrifying to say the least, I had never seen him really look like that, only in my visions and dreams.

"What is going on here?" Carlisle asked calmly,___"How does he stay that calm at a time like this!?" _I asked myself. I saw Edwards eyes flash to me , _"Don't say anything, please!" _I begged to him in my mind. He shook his head and looked back at his brothers.

"Jasper hurt Joanna!" Emmett growled. Instantly I tensed up, why did Emmett care if I was hurt I know he was a little protective but not to this extent.

"I told you it was an accident!" Jasper snapped, His voice was so rough, not the whimsical voice I was used to.

"What if you would have done more damage!" Emmett shoved him into the wall and I winced with the sound. "What then Jasper?"

"I've already beaten myself up over this!" Jasper's voice sounded more pained that last time, I wanted to go to him but that wound have been a horrible idea.

"You just want her blood Jasper, but she is my family, my niece!" I was frozen, Emmett's words played over and over in my head. Emmett was my uncle, how could that be? Then it hit me, my grandpa had a brother that was killed by a bear… Emmett was my grandpa's brother.

Jasper lost it I hear him growl and he pushed Emmett back, "You have no idea how I feel about her!" His enraged voice echoed through out the house, "I never mean to hurt her! I love her!" I gasped and nine pair of eye were on me. Jasper and Emmett let go of each other and stood up straight. Both of them had said things I wasn't meant to hear, and they knew it. Jasper looked like he was going to step foreword but he stood still and looked at me, Emmett looked at me then looked at Rosalie who had turned to him for a second.

"Come on Joanna I am sorry you had to see that." I looked at the person who said that shocked, it was Bella. She didn't really spend that much time with me so it highly surprised me when she grabbed my arm and led me up stairs. She led me into a room which I guessed was hers and by the looks of it Edwards room as well. "I'm sorry about that, are you ok?" she asked sitting next to me on her bed.

"Yeah, I guess." I wasn't sure to be honestly, I didn't like seining Jasper like that, and I found out two things that were kind of a lot to take in.

"I want to apologize for not talking to you sooner." she looked ashamed, "Edward and I got married like three years ago and we haven't wanted to be away from each other, I don't want you to think I don't like you or anything." She admitted looking at me with sad eyes.

I sighed, "I did think you didn't like me, it seemed like you are Edward wee the only ones who were never around. Now it makes since thought, I wouldn't want to be away from my love ether." it was the truth, if I had someone like Edward I would never want to leave there side.

She smiled and nodded, it seemed she believed me and I was thankful for that, "I know what your going through with Jasper." I looked at her confused. "I was Edwards singer, like you are Jasper's." she smiled, like she was remembering. "I bet things happened a bit the same to."

I shrugged, "The could be I don't know." I answered truthfully

"Tell me if this is like anything you have experienced." She looked down at me smiling, "When you first saw him he was the most beautiful person in the world, but hen you got close he lost it, his face twisted up and you thought something was wrong with you. Then he ignores you for a week or so, and one day he just decided to talk to you. You then try to be his friend but all he does is tell you why you shouldn't be and how he is dangerous. Then once he has for the most part accepted you as his friend he says things that make no since and he keeps telling you he is dangerous. Then you start to notice he is always around you and never wants to let anything happen to you, and even gets mad when something does! Plus you realize that the way he talks is so different and his actions place him in another time, then you find out the truth about what he is and you soon learn that this person wants your blood. Then you finally let yourself admit you love him and then you see that he loves you back."

I couldn't speak, maybe she did know what I felt, but then again, Edward didn't do this stuff to her, did he. "Did Edward ever hurt you like this?" I asked her holding up my hand.

"No he never did but Edward is more controlled than Jasper." She shrugged, "It makes since for Jasper to do it, Edward not so much."

"You are the second person to tell me how Jasper is uncontrolled, and I really don't care." I said looking at her, not even fearing the harshness of my tone.

"I know you don't I didn't care ether, nothing could have pulled me away from Edward." She looked at me and smiled.

"I guess we are the same in a way." I smiled at her and she gave me a hug, it felt nice, it was like I was a part of something.

Bella and I sat and talked for a while about random things, we compared Edward to Jasper and I found out how she was created. Edward and Bella had fallen in love, and the Volturi said that she would ether be changed or be killed. She had always wanted to join Edward in his life of forever. Bella told me of how Jasper almost killed her at her 18th birthday party and how he saved the town of Forks from an army of newborn vampires. Sure he had the other Cullen's and shape shifters (which sound pretty cool!) but if he hadn't taught them they would have died. Even with me telling Bella that I understood why she wasn't around, she kept apologizing. She even apologized for Emmett and Jasper, even though she didn't need to.

It was getting rather late when Bella and I finally stopped talking, I looked at the time it was around 6 o'clock. Bella led me down stairs and we saw Alice, Rosalie, and Esme sitting in the living room.

"The guys went out for a talk." Esme said rising from her place on the couch.

I knew by talk she meant Emmett and Jasper would be in trouble, "That's fine, I just want to go home now." I couldn't deny being a little angry with Jasper, I did want to see him but he obviously didn't. I really don't think he meant what he said about loving me, it was probably just a way to get Emmett to leave him alone.

"I can drive you home if you want." Rosalie said looking at me smiling a bit, I guess trying to cheer me up. I nodded and followed her as she walked out the door, she went into the garage and I stayed outside, no matter how much I liked cars I was in no mood to see any.

The car ride was silent, Rosalie tried to talk to me a few times but I never talked back to her or even really listened. My mind was to busy thinking of Jasper, he said he loved me but I knew he was a lie. It was just something to get Emmett to leave him alone and not hurt him, I knew that. When we got to my house I looked at the drive way, my mother wasn't home so that was good. I opened the door and got out of Rosalie's car and waved to her as I opened the door to my house. As soon as I walked in Dominic was right in my way.

"We were right about the vampire thing, and all of the little things they can do as well." He smiled at me as he spoke. I could tell he was really happy about this and I would be to if things had turned out different this afternoon.

"Yeah I know." I said trying to sound like I was happy to but it come out dry and simply uncaring. I walked past him and went straight up to my room, I wasn't in the mood to discuss the Cullen's with him, I knew he would bring up Jasper. As I walked into my room I slammed the door behind me and threw myself onto my bed.

Why did my life always seem to kick me in the ass, it seemed that no matter how good things seemed to be the were always shot down! I tried to be strong and I was until now… Why would Jasper set me up like that? When I first heard him say that then I couldn't have been more pleasantly in shock, but he didn't care enough to see me, or even be there to take me home.

As I laid on my bed and cried along with the rain that fell onto the window I let my mind wonder. As it traveled to the parts of my mind I wanted to forget like all the times I had fun with Lulu when we were little, or how Daddy would always put me to sleep every night, and how Dominic would make run of me for my visions of my future "husband" as I told him. This man was always in my dreams when I was little, tall, blond, muscular, with a very influential presents. In my dreams I never saw his face but I knew he was beautiful, and he was the one for me. He wore a confederate uniform, this man in my dreams is the reason I was interested in the Civil war like I was.

With my thoughts on this mysterious man from my past in my mind I fell asleep to his ghostlike presents. My mind went to him but this time I wasn't a child, I was me and he was holding me, it felt so familiar. His arms were cold I could feel them through his uniform, and the way he held me was so normal and comforting.

"There is no need to cry little one, I'm here." This voice was beautiful and heart stopping, I knew his voice. I knew who it was, the man in my dreams, the man of my dreams was Jasper. As I came to this realization his face came into perfect view, his beautiful, handsome and divine face come to me.

I sat up in bed and felt cold arms around me in a second, my breathing was fast and my heart pounded and I really didn't know why. "I'm here little one, don't be scared." I looked up at my loves, my Jasper's concerned face and for some strange reason unknown to me I wrapped my arms around him.

"I love you Jasper." the words came out before I could stop them.

**Well there it is! I hope it was good, just tell me what you think of it!**


	12. I've jumped

**What can I say other than wow, the last chapter got such great reviews it was amazing. Thank you all so so much, I love you all! And for people her doubts will be explained in the story! And the loopy happy Joanna is back in this chapter, yay!!**

As the words I had said replayed in my mind I pulled away from Jasper quickly, I placed my hands over my mouth and refused to look at him. I couldn't believe what I said to him, why couldn't I have been mad at him like I wanted, or.. pretended like I wanted. No, I didn't want to be angry with Jasper, I never wanted to be angry with Jasper. He looked a little taken back by what I had said and for a moment I thought he was going to leave. But he didn't. He looked at me with the strangest expression I had ever seen, I couldn't tell what he was trying to get across.

I pulled my hands away from my mouth and looked into his eyes, which had become soft. He smiled a bit and grabbed my hand which was bandaged and kissed the tips of my fingers. I watched him, he was being overly cautious again. As he placed my hand gently on my lap he moved one hand up to my cheek, he moved his finger tips along my jaw bone and then to my lips. His hands fell at his sides and he turned away from me, I knew things were to good.

"Joanna, I'm sorry." his voice was dead and he didn't look at me, I placed one hand on his back, I could feel the chill of his skin through his thin shirt. I would have said something but I wasn't sure what he was sorry for so I just rubbed his back. "I should have been there for you,, I felt your anger and yet I didn't come back until a few hours ago." He turned back to me and sighed.

"You don't mean what you said to Emmett, you don't love me." I said putting on a fake smile like it was noting. I didn't want him to think it hurt me like it did, it would only make him feel worse.

He looked at me incredulously, "Do you really believe that?" he asked, it was hard to tell if he was really hurt by that or if he was surprised I could tell the truth.

I looked at him and nodded, "Yeah I do." my answerer was simple and straight. I didn't feel the need to hide anything from him, he could tell what I was feeling, so it would do no good. I looked down, I didn't want to feel this way but I had no control over it, and I didn't know why.

"Its not a lie, I really do love you." he was looking me straight in the eyes and I felt a little intimidated, as well as ashamed. "Why would I lie about something like that?" he asked. The way his voice sounded it seemed to me that I had offended him a little, which as never my intention.

"You weren't there for me, you didn't go with me when I went to see Carlisle when you knew I wanted you there. Then Bella was the one who came to me after me when you said that you loved me, and then when I was going home you didn't come ether!" As I spoke the reason for my anger aloud, the emotion took me again.

He looked down, "I'm sorry I know I should have been there but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I was mad that I had hurt you, I always get extremely angry with my self when that happens. You are the most precious thing that I have in my life, and you will be until you make me leave. Hurting you in my main worry and all I'm doing is proving to my self that I shouldn't be doing this." He looked at me with sad eyes, his expression was clear, he thought he was making a mistake. I couldn't let him think that, he wasn't making a mistake, Jasper was already the best thing that had happened to me, and we weren't even dating.

"Jasper, don't say that! Please don't, you are not making a mistake and if you are I don't care, because it's the best mistake anyone has ever made." I grabbed his hand with my only good one. He looked at me and shook his head and started to open his mouth but I didn't let him speak, "No Jasper, you don't get it. You are the best thing that has happened to me, your not even my boyfriend and you are the best thing in my life, and you always will be. Jasper you can't think you are making a mistake."

My hair had fallen into my face and he smiled slightly as he brushed my hair out of my face, barely touching me. "Please don't say that I am the best thing to happen to you, it makes me feel like I'm taking things from you." He was laughing slightly, making me a little confused, along with his statement.

I tilted my head to the side and looked at him, "Ok I'm confused." I smiled at him making myself probably look stupider than ever.

Jasper placed his fingers over his mouth and placed his thumb under his chin, and simply shook his head. He was shaking slightly and then I knew he was trying to hide his laughter from me. "You are something else Joanna." he said quietly, still shaking his head.

"Is that a complement or are you making fun of me?" I asked him furring my brow making his laughter increase to where I cold hear it. "I'm pretty sure you're making fun of me!" I whined looking away from him. This only increased his laughter even more, he leaned back from me and laughed harder than I had ever seen him. "Jasper, it's not funny!" I crossed my arms and looked away from him pouting as his laughter almost stopped as he looked at me.

"I'll stop." he said smiling, as he backed up a little bit more. I nodded and turned to him and raised my eyebrows, "It's a good thing you stopped I was about to get violent!" suddenly Jasper was standing up laughing. He obviously thought that was funny and it really wasn't. "If you don't stop laughing I am going to hurt you!" I said simply adding to his laughter. His laughter reminded me of me and my cousins this summer, we laughed so loudly that my mother woke up and grounded us. I smiled at the thought but then I realized that Jasper, really wasn't suppose to be in here and if he was caught…well, vampire or not, there would be no more Jasper. "Stop laughing if you wake my mom up I will get in trouble!"

"Sorry, I'll stop now." he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, "My apologies ma'am." For some strange reason that made me blush, as a bit of his old southern accent picked up a bit.

Jasper moved back a bit more but smiled, "Your emotions do things to me that I have never felt from anyone, not even her." he didn't have to say her name I knew he meant Maria. "Its strange, I don't really know what to expect, with each of your emotions mine do something I would have never expected." he furred his brow together and smiled a bit. "I'm not sure why but I like it." I think he was talking more to himself then but I couldn't really tell. He stayed silent for a while looking down.

"Jasper?" I spoke quietly but it seemed like I pulled him out of a trance because as I said his name his head snapped up and he looked at me with an apologetic smile.

"Sorry I was taking in the atmosphere, Alice is her talking to Dominic, and your mother for some reason is happy and you are.. Well there your feelings you know them but this is an extremely happy environment and I was just taking it in." He looked at me and sat at my desk. He played with a pen I had sitting at my desk as he continued to look at me.

"It must be hard, feeling every ones emotions, if even one person's unhappy you feel the same." I said looking at him sympathetically. I always wanted to be able to feel peoples emotions but maybe it wasn't as good as I thought.

"It is." he agreed "Its really hard sometimes, people feel so many emotions in a span of five minutes that is gives me a headache." He looked at me and shook his head, "Don't feel bad, its not a big deal. I'm used to it by now."

"I still feel sorry for you, I know you always feel my emotions everywhere and I'm rather emotional" I said shrugging, feeling bad that I was so overly emotional.

"Don't feel bad, I love feeling your emotions." he said smiling. "I would go crazy if I didn't, they have been with me from the day you were born, I simply chose to ignore them. However when we moved here they kept getting stronger and now they are always so strong that I couldn't imagine being with out them." He looked at me and smiled, "Its like your emotions have become a part of me."

I smiled, that made me feel good, "So are there any emotions that you don't like from me?" I asked smiling, this was something I was highly interested in, if he would tell me.

"Well one is your emotions of excitement when I talk about being a vampire." He sent a dark look at me. "How you feel about me sometimes, I love you and that's a fact but the fact that I have made you fall in love with a vampire… a monster one like me at that its just to much." I shook my head "You are not as bad as you think you are." I walked over to him and placed my hand on his. "Bella told me how you were when you first met her, how you couldn't' go near her. But now look at you, Jasper you are letting me touch you and everything! Think about it Jasper you have gotten so much better." I smiled at him as he stood up and walked away from me and to my window.

"I'm sorry Joanna I need to hunt before I hurt you!" He grabbed my hand and kissed it very lightly then disappeared out my window.

I grabbed my hand and stared at my window for a good five minutes before I walked over to my bed. Did he really need to leave or was it just an excuse to get away from me? I wasn't sure but the fact that he had kissed my hand was enough to make all of my bad thoughts go away temporarily. I was so shocked, I had never been kissed in any way, and it might be silly to you but to me it was extraordinary.

"Can we come in?" I heard Dominic ask quietly outside my door. I knew he was referring to him and Alice, if it was just him he would have walked in.

"Sure." I said as they opened my door and walked in. Alice hopped onto my bed and was laying next to me smiling. "Um hi." I said a little shocked she was doing this.

"Don't be worried about Jasper, he really did need to hunt." She smiled making me feel better. I don't know what it is but its like Alice just brightens up the room. "Okay, thanks for telling me that." I said smiling as she nodded sitting up still on my bed. "Yeah I saw Jasper leave and what you said before that, so I figured that you would think he was angry with you." I nodded as she motioned for Dominic to come sit with us.

He walked over to the bed and sat down next to Alice grabbing her hand, she smiled as she looked at him for a second. I smiled a Dominic, no matter how jealous I was I wasn't going to le them see that. They were happy, Alice had been alone to long and I loved Dominic more than any one on the planet, except maybe dad. "So you two are finally together?" I said smirking, hoping Dominic didn't notice the change in my voice.

"Yep, I knew it was going to happen I just had to give him a little time." she said giggling as she looked back at Dominic who gave a bashful smile.

"I'm sorry." he said blushing causing both Alice and I to laugh at him. I felt a powerful sting of jealousy as Alice touched Dominic's cheek and whispered something in his ear. Jasper barely let me touch him and it seemed he was always holding back when he touched me but with Alice it was like she was completely comfortable with touching Dominic and letting her touch him.

"So what about you and Jasper?" Dominic asked smiling holding onto Alice's hand once again.

I smiled a bit and shook my head but still tried to sound optimistic, "Were not really anything, but he is getting more comfortable I think." I thought back to how he said that he loved me, it was pitiful in a way. I could get someone to confess there love for me yet we were technically nothing more than friends. In my mind I guess I knew we were more but to say that out loud was something I would never do.

"Well you know how he feels, you just need to let him have time to convince himself he can handle it." It was strange even with Alice saying this, it didn't help me. There was no telling how long it would take for Jasper to finally believe in himself.

"Didn't he already say he loved you?" Demonic asked raising his eyebrows.

I reached over and punched him in the knee only hurting myself in the process. I grabbed my hand and looked at him, "I hate you!" I cried looking at him then to my hand.

"What did I do?" He asked a bit louder than he should have. I simply held out my hand and pouted. "You hit me I didn't even touch you." he rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Kiss it and make it better!" I smiled and put my hand in front of his face and smiled. Dominic tried to push my hand out of the way a few times but every time he did I just placed it back as it was. "If you kiss it I will move it!" I said smiling at him as he mumbled something then kissed my hand slightly.

"There are you happy?" He asked looking away from me and Alice as we both began laughing at him. He crossed his arms over his chest and stuck his nose in the air, "I don't like you." this only made me laugh harder. We could hear something down stairs and Dominic got up and went to see what it was.

"Its most likely my mother." I said shrugging as Alice looked at me. It was no big if it was my mom, she would just tell Dominic to go to bed and not check on him. Dominic was a big mommas boy and did what ever she told him so she wouldn't have a doubt that he went in here to go to sleep.

"Joanna, you need to have more faith in yourself." Alice said unsmiling, "Jasper loves you just as he said but it will take a little longer for him to actually trust himself."

I looked down, I didn't really want to hear this even If I needed to, "I know." I nodded.

Dominic walked into the room and put his finger over his lips, "We need to go Alice, mom is going to come up and check on you Joanna." Alice jumped up off my bed and grabbed Dominic's hand.

I groaned and fell back on my bed, "She didn't even know I was up and yet I'm the one she has to check on!" I rumbled to myself. I pulled the covers over my head and pretended to be asleep.

I heard my mother open the door and she left it open for a few moments then silently closed it. I sighed as I heard her walk down the stairs, why didn't she trust me, I hadn't done anything to make her not trust me. I tried to think about that, had I done anything? Unless never missing a day of school never getting lower that a 90 on my report card and only being late once and not even having it could was untrust worthy then yeah. I grabbed my phone of my nightstand and called my best friend, Rosalie.

"_Hello?" _Emmett's voice asked as he picked up Rose's phone.

"_Emmett can you give the phone to Rosalie?" _I asked him quietly.

"_Hummm, I think no." _He was laughing, making fun of the situation, but I wasn't in the mood.

"_No Emmett give her the phone." _I sighed as I heard him give Rosalie the phone.

"_Hey Joanna what's wrong?" _I smiled as her concerned voce reached my ears.

"_Nothing really I just umm…wanted to know if you could come stay with me for a little while?" _I heard her say something to Emmett and felt bad for asking her. "_If I'm interrupting something then forget it!"_

"_No Joanna, calm down, I was telling Emmett I will be going to see you." _I smiled

"_Thanks so much Rosalie." _she hung up the phone and I placed it on my dresser and waited for her to come.

I laid down and waited for her, simply being grateful I had her. Bella told me that Rosalie didn't like her at all, infact she hated Bella in the beginning. I told her that it was because of her that Rosalie liked me. I couldn't imagine Rosalie not being my friend, she had become the person that if I ever needed anything that I could always go to her.

"Hello Joanna." I smiled as the voice of my best friend filled my ears. I propped myself up and with an over exudate sigh I sat up. "Joanna, sometimes you are to much." Rosalie laughed as she sat on my bed.

"I do my best." I said smiling as she hugged me and laughed along with me.

"So I see that Jasper isn't here." she said sympathetically as my laughter stopped, "I take it that's what you wanted to talk about." I looked down and nodded. "What's wrong?"

"I'm not sure but, I don't think Jasper really wants to spend time with me. Its like when we are in the middle of a great moment he has to leave." I looked down at the floor and Rosalie hugged me tighter.

"Jasper really does feel what he says he does, it is just harder for him to be close to you." Rosalie wasn't saying anything that Alice hadn't pretty much told me.

"Well it hurts a bit to see Alice and Dominic acting all lovey dovey, and know that Jasper won't even stay alone with me for to long." I admitting feeling a bit guilty as I did so, they deserved to be happy, but why couldn't I be happy?

"I bet it does, but Jasper will prove that he does some day. He is afraid of himself, the way he was with humans before.. It must be hard for him to be around you." I looked at her and nodded, this was helping but I needed to hear it from Jasper, not Alice or even Rosalie. "I'm probably not the one who could give you he best information on what goes through his mind." I nodded as I laid down and looked at the ceiling.

I felt Rosalie lay down next to me and we both laid on my bed in silence, "Rose, Bella told me that you didn't like her why is that?" I asked looking over at her.

She was quiet for a moment then she sighed, "It was because she was alive and she wanted to just kill herself. It wasn't fare in my opinion, I never wanted this life, I have never even fully accepted it." She looked at me unsmiling, "I regret not giving her a chance, I think the reason we are so distant now was because of our beginning. That's why I gave you a chance, I want to be someone's friend, and half the time Emmett is the only one that likes me, I just want to change that now."

"Well you are my best friend, I am glad you were turned, I hope that doesn't sound mean its just I want a friend so bad." I felt ashamed saying that to her, she wanted to be alive, yet here I was calling her my best friend, yet at the same time saying that I'm glad she is dead.

"Would you like to know exactly why I am angry about why I'm like this?" I didn't say anything but she knew my answer.

She told me everything, about her friend Vera, her son, Royce, Carlisle, her change, how she was suppose to be for Edward and then how she found Emmett. She was happy that she had Emmett, he was her everything but she was upset because she would never have kids. She wanted kids so bad, but now that she was a vampire, she couldn't have them. It made me feel bad for her but she told me not to.

"I am glad that I have you an Emmett though." she said smiling slightly.

"I wish I had someone like Emmett." I said smiling slightly. "He loves you so much and it seems he would do anything for you. I want to have some one who cares about my every move and every word."

She looked over at me, "Joanna you have Jasper, just give him time."

"How much time does he need?" I shook my head, "Its hard to see Dominic and Alice all over each other and Jasper won't stay with me long enough for me to even think about it."

"Its going to take a while, he is new to this." I nodded as she told me this, I knew she was only telling ,me what she knew but it was I guess not good enough.

She looked at me as I took a deep breath as a single tear fell from my eyes, "Well it just feels like when ever he leaves its because I've done something wrong!"

"You have never done anything wrong." My head snapped up as I heard Jasper's voice at my window. He was crouched on my window seal looking at Rosalie and I. The way the moon light hit him made my heart stop, He was gorgeous. His skin seemed like it was glowing, and his hair looked like pure gold, more shocking to me were his eyes. They were pure gold, a color I had never seen his eyes, they were more beautiful than any color I had ever seen. As he jumped off of the window seal and took a step closer his eyes darkened, with every step he took towards me his eyes got a little bit darker.

Rosalie stood up and walked past Jasper and I think whispered something to him but I couldn't hear it if she did, "I'll see you tomorrow Joanna." Rosalie said as she jumped out the window.

I stared at the spot she had been for a moment before my eyes flashed to Jasper, he has a somber look about him, "Why do you think you, do something wrong?" he looked at me with his head cocked slightly to the side.

I looked down at my feet and started fidgeting around, "I don't know." I mumbled, kinda hoping he couldn't hear me, "Its just every time I try to be close to you, you leave, and I like being close to you." He was in front of me instantly.

We just stared at each other not talking at all just staring, but to me it seemed like so much more. I could almost swear that my body was tingling, I could describe the feeling, but what ever it was it was exhilarating. My breath was caught in my throat as he got down eye level with me. He placed his hands on the sides of my face and looked at me, "Joanna, being close to you is dangerous for you." I knew it. I looked down not wanting to her more, "But never think I don't want to be close to you." My head snapped up to look him in the eyes.

"Then why do you always leave Jasper?" I pouted a bit, "Even if you've eaten, you still leave." I pouted more, I think I was trying to effect him, but I most likely wasn't.

One side of his mouth twitched and he ran his thumb over my bottom lip before standing up straight, "I'm afraid that I'll hurt you, if I had done what I did to your hand to any other part of you I could have killed you." he looked down at me "You mean to much to me to be gone."

I smiled at him, I didn't know how bad I needed to hear him say that, "Don't be afraid Jasper." I spoke quietly, not wanting him to for some reason become angry with me. "Take a risk here, I'm willing to!"

"Yeah well you never seemed to be the brightest human." he said smirking a bit raising an eyebrow.

I looked at him curious for a moment before what he said registered in my mind, "Hey!" I yelled "That's mean Jasper!" I pouted and crossed my arms over my chest. I smiled none he less, the more Jasper joked around with me the more I began to think he was letting me into his life, and I desperately wanted that.

Jasper was the only person I had ever came close to feeling like this with anyone. It scared me at first, I had never needed anyone other than myself. I had prepared myself the moment I entered high school, the moment I lost everyone, all of my friends, and the year my dad got sent to Iraq. However when Jasper come here, I needed him, it was like no matter what I did I need Jasper there with me. The extremely curious thing is, even though Jasper has hurt me more than protect me, I felt as if he was my protector. It was a curious feeling, to have to deepened on someone for things was to strange for me, it was like new forbidden territory. Every step here was new and unknown, I wasn't sure if I was doing the right things here. All I know is, whatever step I take, the right one or not, I want Jasper with me.

"Joanna…" I looked at Jasper who had sat down on my bed, I walked over to him and sat down next to him. I expected him to move away from me but, instead he got closer to me. He looked at me and played with my hair. Jasper twirled my hair around his finger and smiled a bit, he was enjoying himself and I was happy he was doing so. I laid my head against his hand as he pressed it against the side of my face. "I'm afraid of taking this risk, if I messed up we both know the end result."

I nodded, "Jasper I know what I'm getting my self into, I know that you could mess up and I would be nothing more than dinner for you. Or lunch, or a dessert, but that's really not the point." He laughed as I shook my head, "Jasper this is a cliff. If we jump together there is a chance that I will get hurt, but there's also a chance that we will both get there safely. Or we can walk away in different directions, I don't know about you but I am ready to jump all I need is you there with me, making sure that I get to the bottom safely."

Jasper's eyes were softer than I had ever seen them, I could see in his eyes that he needed me to. No matter how strong he was on the outside, how much of a vampire, a trained refined strong army major he was, on the inside he was still the kid he was when he was changed. He was still a scared kid, not sure if he was making the right decisions or not. "I guess that I can't let you go alone." he wasn't smiling, but I knew he was happy.

"I've jumped."

**OK! How was that! I hope that it wasn't to much if it was don't be afraid to tell me about it! Well review please!! **

**I NEED YOUR HELP!!!**

**Ok this is the thing, I need you guys to send me a message telling me if the twins should be vampires and what powers they should have if they are turned. If you only want one twin the be a vamp then only tell me that twin but if both then tell me!! And for the person whose power I choose I will write them a story on any thing, Twilight, Harry Potter, and quite a few animes so people please help me!!!**


	13. Oh God No

**First off you people have no idea how happy you made me! It feels so… good (lol) to have so many people that like your story. I really want to thank Superdani, IcyScorpio and JoannaMcCarty (LOL wonder where the name came from!) as well as D. Cullen! You guys are great! And thanks to all of my new readers. Well here is the next chapter! **

That night I dreamt of Jasper, but he was alone. I could feel the fear he held, the empty solitude that held him in place. Every step he took was nerve wracking, so many voices ran around his head and as I was him in my dream, I heard it all. Then it hit me, the sent, I wasn't sure what it was but his throat burned and he went wild. As he ran towards the sent my stomach churned as the source became clear, a human girl. I tried to pull his body back but the mystic beating of the girls heart was music in the ears of my crazed love. I could feel her emotions as he stepped closer, she was calm and happy… not for long. As soon as the girl turned towards Jasper he lunched for her. She let out a horrifying scream and as he bit down I awoke with a start.

The sound of the alarm clock is what had saved me from the fate of my dream, I didn't want to see that or have anything to do with it. I slammed my hand against the top of the alarm and shut it off. I groaned and laid in bed for a little bit waiting for my body to wake up as well as my mind. This process always took a while, which is why I learned to set my alarm 20 minutes before I needed to get ready. As I laid in my bad I thought about last night, "I've jumped he said." did that mean we were together? I hope it did, but if it didn't I just have to be patient… _"I don't want to be patient" _I thought to myself as I threw my legs over the edge of my bed.

Dominic walked into my room not a second later, dressed and seemingly ready to go, "Why are you still not dressed, we need to go." I glared at him and shoved him into a wall as I walked to my closet, I was not a morning person. "Joanna we need to go now!" I didn't need to ask why, he just wanted to see Alice. I heard him groan and walk out slamming my door as he did so.

"Stupid Dominic." I said taking my Avenged Sevenfold tee from the hanger, I grabbed my dark purple skinny jeans and grabbed three of my belts. I quickly put on my clothes and then went to brush my hair and teeth. I had to tease my hair which for some strange reason took me a lot longer to do today then it usually did, I wasn't really sure why but I had extra time as it was so it wasn't a big deal. I however did get a bit frustrated at myself when I messed up a bit.

After a good maybe 30 minutes on my hair, with Dominic coming into my room and telling me to hurry up, I finished. I put away all of my makeup and hair accessories and walked into the living room with my bags. "Well its about time!" Dominic said throwing his arms up. I rolled my eyes as I grabbed the keys and threw them to him.

"Just shut up Dominic." I looked at him for a second before I walked into the kitchen for an apple. I always ate apples in the morning for as long as I could remember, I loved apples and I wasn't sure why and well it really didn't matter.

"Why are you being so grouchy?" Dominic asked as he came into the kitchen and stood across the room, not going anywhere near me.

"You rushed me when I was trying to get up, you know not to do that!" I shrugged as he walked closer to me. "Its just stupid and it puts me in a bad mood all day." by now he was smiling at me in a bit of a creepy way. I put my apple down on the counter and raised an eyebrow, "What?

"I know something that will get you out of your pissy mood easily." there was something in his voice that told me he was right. The smirk he held and the singsong tone his voice possessed made my usually confident side shrink.

"Yeah sure, whatever bro!" I smiled and acted fearless as I tried to walk past him. He stepped in front of me as his smirk grew, I tried to push his arm away but he wasn't as weak as I thought he was.

"You think I have nothing but, ohh believe me dear sister, I have something!" He was enjoying himself way to much for my liking.

"Well dear darling brother I have something for you as well." I smiled sweetly as I punched him in the stomach and stuck my tongue out at him before bolting down the hall way. I could hear him running after me so I turned my path and went straight for the back door.

"I am going to kill you Joanna Lynn McCarty!" I heard him yell as I ran out the backdoor, I was having more fun than I'd had in a long time. I felt free and I felt like myself, as I tried to outrun Dominic. I was half way out to the forest when he grabbed me and threw me on the ground. I struggled against him but he was stronger than I expected, I tried to get away but he simply wouldn't let me go. "Why did you do that?" Dominic was laughing as he started tickling my sides.

I kept trying to talk but I couldn't all I could do was squirm around laughing so hard my sides hurt. We both were out of breath but we didn't care ether, we were having fun, it was amazing how long it seemed to have been since Dominic and I had one of those moments. Where everything but us disappears, all we need is each other, Dominic was the only person I really had for so long. He is so much more than my brother, in a way I would say he is part of me. If I didn't have my brother I would be lost, I knew I would, just as much as I knew he would be lost with out me.

"Sorry to interrupt but I know you will be devastated if you are late to school again Joanna." my head snapped in the direction on the voice. I wiped my eyes as I saw Jasper's smiling face.

Dominic stood up and brushed himself off, "Hey Alice." he said smiling at Alice who was standing next to Jasper smiling as big as I was.

My face hurt from laughing to much, but yet I was still smiling. My face was still hurting and my eyes were watering a bit. I closed my eyes and wiped my face. As I opened my eyes Jasper was standing over me smiling, I smiled back at him as he extended his hand. I grabbed his icy hand and he pulled me up. When he did this he leaned down and whispered, "I love this emotion from you." in my ear, sending chills to my spine.

We followed Alice and Dominic inside the house, our hands intertwined. His icy cold one seemed to devour mine. I felt butterflies in my stomach as I realized… I was holding hands with MY BOYFRIEND!

"Hey we are going to head out now ok?" Dominic said as he and Alice walked out the door. I smiled I was so happy for my brother, as well as happy for me.

I grabbed my bad from the couch and smiled at Jasper, "Are you ready to go?" he asked smiling still. I was guessing that my happiness had drifted to him. He grabbed my hand and walked with me out the door, the whole time my heart was pounding and butterflies swirled around my stomach. Jasper looked down at me so I knew he was paying attention to one of two things, both equally possible 1) my emotions and 2) my heart beat.

His Hummer was sitting in the drive way next to where the truck was suppose to be, I smiled, no matter how many times I saw the hummer it still was amazing. "Why didn't you tell me you were going to pick me up?" I asked as I struggled to get into his hummer. Usually he had the steps down, but I guess he had forgotten them to day.

I heard him laugh, at my question or the way I looked I couldn't know, but I had a strong feeling it was the way I looked. I had my arms over my chest in the seat trying to get in, my feet where dangling and I was sure it was an amusing sight. "Well." I took in a deep breath and my face got red as he put his hands on my hips. "I wanted it to be a surprise." he lifted me into the hummer and before I could get the feeling of his hands out of my mind he was in the drivers seat.

"Well it is a pleasant surprise." I said my face still a bit red. He started the engine and was out of the drive way like a maniac. Not that I minded driving that way, speed has always been my thing. I saw him smile out of the corner of my eyes and smiled along with him. I looked over at him fully and regretted it. Instead of seeing the calm solder I saw the evil one, but this time it was different. He was standing tall, his eyes still blood red, but his teeth were not bared, he was looking at me with a sickening smirk on his face. The look in his eyes was one of hunger but something else… lust, no I would think not. But I didn't know what else it could be.

"I'm sorry…" I heard Jasper's faint voice, I closed my eyes and opened them again and saw the real Jasper. He had his head down and looked sullen, I didn't like him like this, he didn't seem to be one for this mood. I sighed and shook my head looking out the front window, then I realized something.

"Jasper watch the road!" I yelled shaking his arm as best I could, he looked at me a bit taken aback. He simply stared at me like I had lost my ever loving mind, I shook his arm again, "I don't feel like getting into an accident Jasper please look at the road!" at this point his face held a smile and he began laughing at me. I wasn't sure what was so funny, I was only telling him to watch the road like he should be to prevent our or really my death. My grip on his arm probably would have hurt a human but Jasper was not a human, even better now that my nails were pressed against his arm so hard my fingers began to hurt.

We were at school before I had time to even think, I still hadn't let go of his arm and I wasn't sure my fingers would bend anymore. Jasper laughed and grabbed my hand gently removing it from his arm, "Come on kitten." he said getting out of the hummer and walking over to my door.

_Did he just call me kitten? _I asked myself as I felt my face grow extremely red. I saw him stiffen as he opened the door. I tried to make my blush go away but I just kept thinking of what he called me, "Why did you call me kitten?" I asked in a high pitch quiet voice.

He smiled at me and held his hand out for me to grab, once I did he pulled me out of the seat, "Well." he furred his eyebrows and looked deep in thought "Kittens are cute and small and well, you are cute and small." he said shrugging as I looked up at the school.

This time I was able to keep down my blush but not of my own will, but because of the people looking out the cafeteria window with there mouths open. Was it honestly that big of a thing for someone like me to be with someone like Jasper… I didn't even have to think. Yes, yes it was. He loosely held my hand as we walked into the school, I was ready to listen to all the rude comments and hide behind Jasper, wishing I could die but as I saw the looks on everyone's faces, the feeling disappeared and felt rather smug, "That's how you should feel." Jasper whispered to me with a smirk on his face.

All of these people were in shock that me miss freak of the year got perfect Jasper Hale, the girls were so jealous even I could since it… and it made me feel empowered. They wanted him and I got him, I was the winner of there little game, and I wasn't even playing! This feeling was amazing, now I knew how it felt to be envied, they wished they were me, it was hard to think but they truly did.

"I love this." I said holding Jasper hand tighter and smiling a full smile, I could tell he was smiling and happy by the way he rubbed the back of my hand with his thumb.

When we walked in the cafeteria I could see the others in the corner smiling at us, I think Alice was the happiest, in fact it looked like Edward was holding her down to stop her from moving anymore than she was in her seat. Dominic looked like the happiest man alive sitting with Alice his hand in hers, and I couldn't blame him. Jasper's hand tightened on mine and looked up at him curiously, "Lucas doesn't like that your with me, in fact he is utterly furious with you." His face held a scowl and I wasn't sure why. I looked in the direction his eyes kept flickering to and saw Lucas glairing at Jasper and I. The way he looked made me feel strangely uncomfortable, I gripped Jasper's hand tighter and moved closer to him.

I saw Edward and Emmett get out of there seats and walk over to us hurriedly as I heard a growl slip through Jasper's clenched teeth. At first I thought it was me that was bothering him but he pulled me tighter and looked at Lucas with a look that would have made me run and hide. "Jasper calm down, he's just a stupid human, and Joanna is watching, you don't want her to see you like this anymore." Edward said as he placed a hand on his shoulder. Emmett positioned himself behind me, blocking Jasper's view of Lucas. He shook his head and pulled me with him to the table.

We sat down next to Alice and Dominic and I smiled at Jasper, trying to be happy to if at any way possible make him happy, "So you finally let her know how you felt." Rosalie said a little coolly.

I looked at her an furred my brow, she wasn't usually like this around me. I blew it off and simply listened to everyone talking around me, Emmett was going on about something he did on a game and Bella was laughing over how excited he was getting about it. Jasper was holding my hand under the table, I figured by the way he was doing this, he was still mad about Lucas. I looked over at him and smiled once before turning to Alice who was talking to me and Dominic about our history homework.

When the bell rang Jasper walked with me to class, causing me to receive more looks of awe, hate, envy and so many others it was hard to count all of the different looks. Mrs. Heflin had seen Jasper and I holding hands and as soon as he was out of sight bombarded me with questions. She wanted to know when we got to together, if I asked him out or if he asked me, She wanted to make sure he was being nice and boosting my self confidence (I told her yes, but not how much because I didn't want to seem like a freak).

Today during class we were watching a movie just to pass the time, she wasn't able to get her lesson plan in order so she made us write then watch the movie or talk which ever you preferred. For me however, my mind was made u by Bella and Alice. I was made to talk, no matter how much I liked the movie, which I didn't SO it really didn't bother me not having a choice. They wanted me to know the real Jasper, the moody side that wanted nothing to do with anybody, the violent side, the protective, his depressed side, all of him ,and I was grateful. Jasper wasn't one to just come out and tell you his problems so it was nice to know what his moods were and how to help him.

The rest of the day went by uneventful, I could hear people saying how I was a witch! If only they knew that Jasper was the creature not me. How bad would it spoil there fantasies, to have he best looking guy in school be a blood sucking vampire? I wasn't sure, but the thought made me giggle, so I assume its not good. In Anatomy the only thing I could hear was Lulu saying how Jasper only wanted me for sex, and I was the easiest thing he could get. I wanted to yell at her but I also wanted to stay in a good mood for Jasper during lunch and art class. For lunch however, remaining happy was pointless. The sun had come out so I was alone with Dominic. Jasper texted me when Dominic and I were outside that they would be back after art, but Lucas left school so he wouldn't bother me. Hearing that made me relax a bit, I knew art would have been hell if Lucas was there and Jasper not.

Once art class was over Jasper was as he said waiting for me at the door, I couldn't fight the smile that crept its way onto my face. He smiled back and grabbed my warm hand with his cool one. It was strange, I was almost like if I wasn't cold it didn't feel right, like something was wrong with me and that something was missing. The rest of the day was the same, boring class of people talking, Jasper waiting for me at the door, boring class of people talking, Jasper waiting for me at the door, boring class of people talking, Jasper waiting for me at the door, and so forth.

When the final bell came it was sunny again so Jasper had to leave, causing me to loathe the sun with every fiber of my being. Leave it to the sun to screw over the best day of my life! I walked to the truck without Dominic, he had gone with Alice a few minutes earlier, they were going to get new clothes for him. As soon as I got in the truck put my head against the window and smiled thinking. Dominic and I went from being the people who no one could ever love, to being with and being loved by the two best looking people in the school. It was almost unbelievable, but it was very real, I was in love with a vampire, and more than that he loved me back.

As I pulled up to the drive way I saw my moms car in our spot, it was weird, she was never home now, not unless something bad happened. I bit my lip as I got closer to the house dreading what she would tell me, however when I pulled in a little more I could see it wasn't my mother car at all.

"Hey there Joanna." a mans voice said as I stepped out of my truck to soon.

My only thought was _"Oh God no" _

**So How was it??? Sorry If the end seemed a bit rushed but I had to get this out!!! I'm going to be out of town and that means no comp, but I hope it was still good, and many things will be explained in the next chapter!! And sorry about the hanger I thought it would be a real nice place to stop!!! Lol I bet you guy know who it is if you just think!!! Lol Review!!! **


	14. Hard to Resist

**YAY!!!! I HAVE AN UPDATE!!!! I hope you all like it, I am so sorry it took so long like really really sorry but The end I hope will make up for it but some of you may think Jasper is a little ooc but his behaver will be explained in the next one!! I hope you like it! **

The voice ran over and over in my mind, why was he here. I took a deep breath and stood up straight. I walked past him on my way to my door. Though on the outside I was calm, my insides were screaming, I was hoping Jasper would notice this and come to see what was wrong, but nothing. I wasn't sure how, I just knew something bad was going to happen, something that no one would like. I looked around me and saw young girls screaming at me, I could hear what they were saying but I didn't like the looks on there faces. The question of why Jasper wasn't here? He always came right when I needed him.. Why wasn't he here now?

I could feel him staring at me, it was almost like I could feel the hatred rolling off him. One of the silent girls was next to me screaming, she was trying to grab my hand. I couldn't breath as I watched her hand go through mine yelling and looking as if she was trying to pull me to or away from something. I hated this but no matter how hard I tried to make it stop it never worked. Walking up to my house I could feel him behind me and I could see the girls yelling.

"Joanna, why do you always ignore me?" As I opened the door he put his arm in front of me, "Where's Jasper now?" Lucas voice was sickening. I tried to push his arm away but he wasn't the weakest guy in school. Lucas pushed me back hard and I landed on the gravel hard. "Why do you keep trying to get away from me!" He walked over to me and picked me up by my shirt leaving my feet dangling in the air. "All I ever do is try to talk to you yet you always leave or something!" I looked beside him was another spirit. This one had an evil looking smile and slicked back hair, he was wearing a leather jacket with a dark shirt under it. A greaser from the 50's or so I guessed.

I looked around me looking for Jasper or anyone really but no one was around, "You're an ass to me!" I said struggling against his grasps I started to claw at his hands still looking around me for anyone.

"How am I suppose to act to you!" He said shaking me a bit hard. "He walked over to the wall slamming me up against it, I could feel my head hit the wall and bounce off as the air was knocked out of me. "I try to get you to notice me all through high school and then Hale comes along and your automatically in love with him!" he laughed to himself a bit as he raised his fist. "Why!" I was expecting to feel his fist but instead I heard a voice that I had been so longing to hear.

"Because." I felt his hands releasing my shirt and as I opened my eyes I saw Jasper Holding his fist so tight Lucas looked like he was about to scream. "I don't beat the hell out of her!" Jasper pushed him what I was guessing was light to him but Lucas almost flew across my yard. Jasper looked terrifying, his eyes were black and he was showing his teeth in a slightly crouched down stance.

"Funny way to show your love don't you think Edward?" I smiled at the Sound of Emmett joking voice. He was standing behind Lucas showing all of his teeth in a maniac smile.

I looked over in the direction he was looking in at Edward, "Strange way indeed." Edward walked over to Lucas and looked at his hand and sighed looking at Jasper, "Its broken."

Jasper scoffed and walked over to me leaning down, "Are you ok?" he asked putting his hand up to my head.

I looked up at Jasper from my place on the ground, I was more than happy he had appeared when he did. Lucas looked utterly terrified as the three of them stood around us. I was glad that Lucas was scared, he deserved to be more than scared but there was no way he would be. Jasper was still looking down at me but I couldn't speak, it seemed my body just wouldn't let me.

When I was finally able to speak the only words out of my mouth were, "I'm ok." Jasper nodded then turned to Lucas. He was busy looking at Emmett, it was clear that Emmett intimidated Lucas, but Jasper was the real one to worry about.

Jasper began to walk towards Lucas, he was walking slowly and quietly, he was crouched slightly as he approached him. Now Jasper looked like the monster he though he was, he looked like a true predator. There was no doubt in my mind that Jasper wanted to kill Lucas, and if Emmett and Edward weren't here then he would kill him. "What's your problem?" Jasper's voice was a low growl as he spoke. Lucas looked at jasper with fear in his eyes, I could see Emmett and Edward tense us as Jasper got closer. "Why do you do this!" I didn't like his voice like it was and nether did Edward and Emmett. They moved slightly in front of Lucas.

"Jasper, don't loose your self." Edwards voice was low and warning.

"You say you like her but this is the way you show it?" He laughed dryly, "You show her affection that you have no right to show!" His body shook as he began to scream "You have no right to show MY Joanna affection of any sort! All rights you had of giving her any affection was taken away the day I came here!" I bit my lip as my face got red. I could feel my heart beating faster as he spoke. The words "My Joanna" kept replaying ion my mind. Suddenly I was pulled back into the situation as Emmett and Edward moved in front of Lucas doing there best to look normal.

I stood up slowly and closed my eyes, he needed to stop, but I didn't know how to make him… or if I even could. "Jasper." My voice was quiet and shaky, I didn't want to talk but, I had to do something. I was afraid…even to myself I hated admitting that, but Jasper wanted my blood more than anyone he had ever met. He was never fully in control, even when he was in semi-control of himself, however now he was angry and out of control. The only thing that made me go over to him, was the fact that I loved him, he made me feel so special and he was always trying so had just to be with me so I had to stop him from doing something he would regret.

"Please, Jasper stop for me." My voice was still shaky as I walked closer to him. Edward and Emmett were both looking at me with urgency in there eyes, but I wasn't worrying about what they thought. My Jasper needed me just as I needed him.

Jasper was still crouched but he wasn't moving, his hands were clenched tightly together as he stood there. I walked up to him every inch of my body shaking worse than it had ever been. Slowly I raised my hand and placed it on his back while my heart was pounding so hard on my chest. He stiffened and I stood still for a second then regained the small amount of myself I had before and slowly grabbed his arm. My heart was going wild in my chest as I held his arm to me with my eyes closed. I gasped loudly as he wanted his arm away from me almost knocking me down.

Jasper looked at Edward and he let him pass by him, I wasn't sure what was going on and I was a little concerned. Jasper picked up Lucas with one hand and looked up at him, "If you ever touch Joanna again and I will kill you, and don't doubt I will. When you see her don't even look at her or think about looking at her!" Jasper dropped Lucas and he stood up and ran back to his car and drove away looking at Jasper the whole time. "Joanna." I looked at Jasper as he spoke. His voice was monotone and he wasn't looking at me. "I'm sorry I wasn't here." He looked at me for a moment, his eyes were pitch black and he seemed even paler than usual, it seemed that he had aged even though I knew it was impossible.

Jasper looked away and then walked away from me, I started to walk after him but Edward put his arm in front of me, "Not now Joanna, he needs to hunt." I looked up at Edward, his face was blank and he looked at Emmett.

Emmett nodded and walked over to me, "Come one lets go to our house." Edward must have told him something. I watched Edward run off in the direction Jasper had went and sighed, they didn't trust him alone.

"Why did Edward follow him?" I asked quietly looking at the ground. Emmett pushed me slightly.

"Don't be so sad kid!" He said smiling, "Edward just had to make sure he didn't do anything stupid that's it!"

I nodded and looked ahead of me taking a deep breath, "Why did Jasper get so mad?" Emmett laughed loudly and I looked up at him curiously. "What's so funny?"

"You really don't know why he was so mad?" Emmett shook his head smiling, "Well for one Lucas hurt you and he wasn't there to stop it again." He paused and looked down at me biting his lip slightly, I could tell he wasn't sure if he should tell me what he wanted to, "Second vampires are very territorial, and Jasper even more so than others. He found something, you, that makes him truly happy and now he has to make sure that nothing happens to you and that nothing or no one takes you away from him."

I nodded and looked at him, "Why are vampires territorial?"

Emmett looked down at me and then stuck his bottom lip out and groaned, "Oh hell I don't know!" He thought, "I guess its got something to do with our animal sides, but I really don't know, why the hell do you ask questions that I cant answer!"

I laughed slightly and shrugged, "I guess I should ask Carlisle instead of you."

Emmett nodded then looked at his cell phone, "Well we should get going, let take your truck." I nodded and went to the truck but when I went to open the door Emmett picked me up and moved me. "Hey what the hell!" I yelled as he looked back at me and smiled.

"You must be this tall to drive!" He waved his hand over my head and I pushed him the best I could. He laughed, "Just get in the car tiny Tim." I rolled my eyes and got in the truck.

"You know tiny Tim is a boy right?" I asked as he started the truck, He laughed and then stepped on the gas and the truck sped out of the drive way. I smiled as he drove, I was sure he was driving as fast as my truck would go, "I have to have Rose look a this when we get there." I wasn't quite sure why she would need to look at it but I didn't mind. Rosalie was older than me which meant she was a better mechanic and it would be fun to see what knew.

As we drove to the Cullen home I laid my head on the window, I was worried about Jasper. What if he killed Lucas, I knew if he did there would be no way he would be able to be around me. I silently cursed the fact that I was such a problem for him, I wish I could make it less hard for him but there was only one way to do that… and I wasn't doing that. My mid was also thinking about what Emmett said, I had no idea why but the thought of Jasper being protective made me feel… well im not sure but I did like it. I never had anyone care about me like that. Maybe it was strange to like someone being protective of you but I had no prior experience with anythi8ng like this so I didn't really know, but I didn't really care ether.

When we arrived Dominic, Alice, Rosalie and Bella were waiting outside, Emmett was the first one out and he opened my door. My feet hadn't even hit the ground when Dominic was at my side, "Are you ok?" He asked as I was finally out of the car.

"Yeah I'm fine don't worry about me Dom." I said walking past him, I knew he was going to act this way, but he was my brother.

"Don't worry?" Dominic laughed sarcastically, "How can you tell me not to worry! You could have been really hurt Joanna!"

"Calm down Dominic." Alice said smiling up at my brother who rolled his eyes as Emmett patted him on the back laughing. "So are you ok?" Rosalie asked watching my brother and Emmett. She was wearing a red tank top and ripped jeans and I was wearing so many different things yet I still felt under dressed next to her.

"Yeah I'm fine, just got shaken up a bit." I was telling the truth but I was also playing it off as if I wasn't bothered by it.

"Oh Hey babe can you look at Jo and Dom's truck, it goes way to slow!" I looked over at Emmett, my truck didn't go to slow, I had no idea where he got that stupid idea from but I took offence to it.

"What do you men its to slow?" I asked loudly as Emmett got back in the truck and drove it into the garage. I followed him and Rosalie went with me, "I asked you something Emmett!" He laughed as kicked the door of my truck leaving a dent.

"I can fix that." Rosalie said as she walked over to a closet like thing and pulled out her tools.

Emmett patted my head and smiled, "Don't lose your temper short one!" I glared at him, he walked over to Rosalie and started talking to her as she quickly fixed the dent.

As I watched them work I smiled, they were only talking and not even talking that much but you could tell that they were truly in love. I knew all the joking and playing around Emmett was doing was to keep my mind off of Jasper for now but it didn't really work. I was still thinking about him. I wanted him back here with me now, but he had to hunt so he could be with me. I laid my head on the wall and slowly feel asleep, surprisingly no dreams entered my unconscious mind.

When I awoke I was lying on a bed, I looked around the room, I couldn't really see anything due to the darkness. There was no light coming from out side and the lights were off. I stood up and felt around me making my way to the door to try and find the light switch. Once I turned it on I looked around the room, there were so many books, it looked like a library more than a bed room. Above a desk that had a computer on it was an old Confederate flag, I knew then that this was Jasper's room. I walked over to a shelf that caught my eye. There were pictures on it, some of them were of the Cullen's others were black and whites that I had never seen before. When I looked closer I knew they were jasper's human family. There was one of him with a woman who looked just like him, it was his mother, everything about them seemed to be so similar. The way her eyes were shaped , her nose, jaw everything. Upon a closer look at the pictures I could tell Jasper was the only boy out of five children.

"You like them" I quickly turned around as I heard Jasper's voice. He was looking past me at the pictures. His eyes were a dark gold color and they darkened as he walked closer to me.

"You look like your mom." I whispered as he picked up the picture of his mother and himself.

Jasper smiled slightly and put it down, "I miss her." He said simply "Every human memory I have that's not about the war has something to do with her." He shook his head and turned the picture down.

I could feel his sadness as I put my hand on his shoulder, he looked down at me. "Its ok, I would miss my mom to." I put my head on his arm. I was happy he was back, but I was even more happy he didn't push me away.

"I know it is but its been so long I just want to get over it." he pulled away from me gently and ran his fingers through my hair.

I bit my lip and tried to speak but he ran his fingers over my lips. I was frozen, I couldn't move, not that I wanted to but I felt literally stuck to the ground. He moved closer to me and moved his hand down my neck and then back up to my cheek. It wasn't his usual touch where he barely touched me with his fingertips, he wasn't tying to be overly careful. He put his hand on my waist and I gasped, I was expecting him to move away but he ignored it, much to my liking. "I forgot how it felt to truly touch someone." He whispered.

My heart was raging in my chest as he looked down at me, I wasn't sure why he was acting this way but it was new and I like it. Jasper pulled my body to his and I took in a deep breath, he was looking at me the whole time, watching my reactions and judging my emotions. It was almost like I could feel him in my mind, he moved his other hand to my throat again and put his finger on my jugular. My eyes widened but he shook his head, "Im not going to." he whispered lightly as he took a step towards me, before I knew it I was pinned against a wall with Jasper's body still against mine.

My mind was racing, I had never been in a situation like this and I hadn't really expected to for a good while. I had no idea what Jasper was thinking or what he wanted, but the feeling he was giving me were amazing. He moved both of his hands to my waist as he leaned down moving his head to my neck, my heart was about to beat out of my chest as I felt his cool breath on my neck, "You have no idea how hard it is to resist your blood." he moved his head away from my neck and pushed against me more, his face centimeters away from mine, "Or your body."

**I hope you like it!!! Rate and Review please and the next update will be real soon!!!**


	15. Physical for Superdani!

**OK!!!!!! This chapter is short but I sware you will LOVE it haha!! I hope you like it and this is dedicated to Superdani, my most awesome reviewer**

Though my heart was raging inside of me, my breath was stopped, I was simply unable to bring myself to breathe. Jaspers hands moved down to my hips, I could feel his cold hands through my clothes. I looked up at him, his eyes were pitch black as he looked at me, I could tell he was fighting himself now. His breath was now longer and heavier as it hit my lips, sending my head spinning. His hands were shaking as he moved his face closer to mine. The grip he held on my hips tightened as the seconds passed, I wasn't sure of what to do. I liked this feeling and I didn't really want it to stop but he had to. The grip was so tight at one point I wanted to cry but I stopped myself, I didn't want him to think hurt me again. Jasper wasn't looking in my eyes anymore, he was now looking at my neck. At that moment I knew that my Jasper was gone. His grip soon became unbearable, despite my best efforts I cried out in pain. I pushed against his chest to push him away or to let him now I wanted him to stop, however his grip only tightened.

I hit his chest with a bit more force and pushed away from me and sat on his bed. The pin was horrible but I couldn't let myself cry, I wouldn't let myself cry, There was no doubt in my mind that my hips would be bruised later but at the moment I didn't want to think about that. Jasper was staring at the floor, his body was still shaking as he tightly clenched his fists. A low growl slipped through his tightly closed lips and I knew it was time for me to leave.

I quickly made my way to the door, "Don't leave me." Jasper said quietly as I put my hand on the door knob. I looked at him out of the corner of my eyes, he always wanted me to leave when things got like this.

Before I could think Jasper was at my side looking down at me. I didn't look at him, I was concerned about why he wanted me to stay… and my only thought was that he wanted to kill me. Slowly Jasper moved his hand up and rested it on mine, "Please Joanna, I wont hurt you," I looked up at him, he was staring at our hands. As I let go of the door he grabbed my hand and held it smiling slightly. "You have no Idea how sorry I am." He said as his grip on my hand tightened.

I placed my hand on his arm and pushed lightly, "You need to calm down Jasper." I said quietly and apprehensively, I was afraid he wouldn't like me saying that.

Instead of being angry he pulled my arm up and pressed the back of his cold hard lips against the back of my hand. I bit my lip as he laughed lightly smiling, "You were afraid to tell me to calm down why?" For once his face showed pure amusement, I turned away blushing, "Your emotions are confusing but interesting."

I pouted and turned away from him even more not wanting to have to look at his smiling face. Jasper moved around me and grabbed my chin smiling at me and ran his hand down my cheek. "I was afraid you would be mad at me for telling you that." I admitted looking down.

Jasper laughed and wrapped his strong cold arms around me, I froze up a bit but soon I laid my head against his strong chest. "Oh Joanna." I tilted my head up to look up at him. "When will you learn that I could never be angry with you."

I couldn't fight the smile that appeared on my face as he spoke, he put his chin on top of my head and I could feel his chest moving as he took unnecessary breaths. "You always say that but I bet you that one day I will do something to make you mad." I knew deep down in my heart that this was true and I dreaded the day.

"Maybe it will but I don't expect it to happen anytime soon." I nodded as he let go of me.

I was confused as I watched him walk over to the dresser and place the pictures he had set down back up to there normal position. Jasper ran his fingers over the picture with his whole family. I slowly walked over to him and put my hand on his back. He looked at me and smiled slightly as he began to run his fingers through my hair. I didn't say anything in fear of interrupting him from his thoughts.

"That's your human family right." it wasn't really a question because I knew the answer. "What are there names?

I looked at him as he looked at the younger girls, "My sisters Alison, Mary, Katie, and Maybell. My mother Sarah and my father Gregory." I nodded as he spoke, "You want me to tell you about them?"

I smiled and grabbed his hand slowly, "I want to know everything about you."

Jasper nodded and walked over to his bed and sat down, he grabbed my hand and pulled me over to him. The pain of my hips was horrible but I ignored it, I didn't want to ruin this moment. I looked at him and smiled, I went to sit down but he grabbed my waist and pulled me in his lap. My face automatically got red and I heard him chuckle as he grabbed my hand.

He started to play with my fingers, he softly kissed my hand then sighed, "I don't remember much but I will tell you everything I remember." I nodded simply happy he was opening up to me. "My sisters were all older than me with Maybell being the oldest followed by Mary, Alison and then Katie was only a year older than me. Katie never really liked me, Maybell, who I was closest to, told me it was because I was a boy. My parents always wanted a boy, but they never got one. When Katie was born my mother had horrible time delivering her and the doctor, or what we would call her doctor, told her she would never have any more children." He looked over at the pictures. "All of my other sisters besides Katie had been spoilt by my parents as by Abigail who was our caretaker. When I was born all focus was on me, because I was the boy they had been wishing for. They never had a chance to shower her with affection so she grew up with out the love she should have been given."

I nodded and he looked over at the pictures and smiled, I could feel his happiness, "My mother was extremely beautiful, as you saw. She was so sweet and never lost her temper and always had a smile on her face. My mother was the only person I knew who held no hostile feelings or angry things to say about the Yankees, but me I hated them." I smiled slightly as he said Yankees, his accent had slipped out, I watched him as he closed his eyes, "She would always tell me, "_The people up there have no idea what its truly like here. There simply confused about things, and I beg you not to get mixed up in this war none since." _No matter what she was telling me I had my father telling me that every family needed honor and that the only to receive that would be to fight." I looked at him, his jaw was tight as he thought of his past. In a flash I saw the solider and waited for the monster… but it never came.

"I signed into the army at 17, I have been this tall since I was about 16 so I was easily able to pull it off. A few days later I went into training, the people there were not fit for the army really, shop keepers, farm boys, and some old men. The only thing I remember besides that about my training was that I was good at it, I was damn good at it." He smiled slightly then it faded, "The battles were horrible, the first one I was in, it was pitiful, no one really knew what to do. When people became more experienced they became bigger. I don't know what got me noticed but I was. Soon into my second year I was moved up to Major, I was…"

"The youngest major in the whole Confederate army?" I said smiling as I interrupted him.

He looked down at me and smiled nodding, "It figures you would know." he held me tighter but made sure not to hold me to tight. However when he moved me somehow I hit my hips. I felt excruciating pain but I smiled and made myself happy so he would have no idea what was going on, there was no way I wanted to ruin this. He looked down at me as his smile faded, "You know the rest of my story, I don't really want to talk about it… if its ok with you." He said quietly.

I smiled and put my hand on his cheek and smiled, he looked at me and I could feel his happiness, "You never have to tell me anything you don't want to, you will tell me sometime."

Jasper sighed and lightly put his lips to my palm then looked at me, he seemed to be looking very closely and I had to look away. The way he was looking at me, it wasn't bad it was just new. I couldn't tell what he was thinking or feeling, he was just staring at me. A small smile spread across his face as he shook his head, I looked at him curiously.

"I want to be closer to you, physically." My eyes widened and my face got read, I could feel my heart speed up and my stomach was… as corny as it sounds as full of butterflies. He ran his thumb over my lips and bit his lip, "I cant do it no matter how hard I want to." he pulled his hand away.

I grabbed his hand and held it, "I…I want you to." I couldn't look him in the eye, I couldn't even breathe. I probably sounded like and idiot to him, I had no idea why I said that. I just couldn't stop my self.

Jasper ran his fingers down my face and tilted my chin making me look at him. "You are not allowed to feel that way about anything you ever say to me ok?" he was serious as he spoke then he smiled moving my hair out of my face as I nodded. "I know you would like me to… and I would love it but Im not sure I could handle it, I tried earlier and you know the result."

"Jasper." He looked at me, "I honestly don't give a damn, you have never hurt me bad and you always stop." I bit my lip I wasn't sure if what I said was smart or not.

He was looking at my mouth as I spoke then he looked at me, "You can never count on that!" I flinched, I knew I shouldn't have said that. "If you hadn't started hitting me then I would have killed you!"

I nodded and stood up moving away from him as he yelled, he stood up and looked at me. "I'm sorry." he looked down and walked over to his window, "You can leave now… I wont stop you."

I looked at him shortly then walked over to the door. I opened the door and sighed, I couldn't leave, I didn't want to leave. I closed the door and looked at Jasper's back, slowly I walked over to him and put my hands on his back looking out the window, "What time is it?" I asked quietly, I didn't want the silence and it was the only question that came to my mind.

"Its three in the morning." He said not looking at me. He kept looking outside as if he didn't want to look at me.

I groaned and looked at him, pushing him a bit, "Jasper look at me!" I almost yelled.

Jasper looked down at me with a sigh, "What do you want?" he asked rudely.

He hadn't spoke to me like that in a long time, "I want you to stop overreacting to everything!"

"I don't over react Joanna." he said rolling his eyes.

I scoffed, "You were yelling and I was afraid so I moved! Then you get all depressed, Jasper if that's not over reacting then I don't know what is!"

Jasper looked at me and sighed, "I know I do, but I can't help it. When I scare you I hate myself."

"well you shouldn't, I get scared easily just don't take it to heart." I stopped and looked at him, "You know how you always say you not mad at me but at you." He nodded finally looking down at me. "Well, im not always scared of you, im afraid I did something wrong."

Jasper looked at me and shook his head, "You never do anything wrong other then trusting me to much."

I rolled my eyes as he spoke, he always said that and I was never going to say attention to it, "I don't believe that." I said looking up at him.

Slowly Jasper put his hands on my waist and pulled me to him, "Do you want me to prove it to you?" he asked looking at me. I wasn't sure what to say, his mood swings were terrorizing me. I put my hand on his arm slowly and smiled lightly, I was happy about this but I wasn't sure if this was only to make me happy or if he really wanted this.

"Jasper you don't have to do this." I said trying to pull away but he held onto me firmly.

He smiled, "I told you earlier I wanted to be close to you."

Jaspers hands were on my waist moving his thumbs in circles, he seemed to be debating with himself. He let out a deep sigh and looked at me again, he leaned down. My heart was pounding as he pulled my body against his fully, his face was closer to mine and I stared at him unsure of what to do. I could now feel his breath on my lips and he moved closer once again. He stopped less than an inch away from my lips, it almost looked like he was going to pull away when his cold lips hit mine.

**Well.... do you love it???**


	16. Family

**The next two chapters were suppose to be one super long one but when I read over it i saw that maybe there was to much going on in both to have it be one chapter so i separated them. However i'm still worried that maybe there is still to much in this chapter, if there is tell me ok! **

My head was spinning, I had never felt this way before his cold lips seemed to fit perfectly with mine. I kissed him back and his grip tightened on my waist but not in a bad way. Jasper pulled away from me and smiled to himself, I could tell he was happy about being able to do that. I bit my lip and blushed as he looked at me, I wanted to look away from him but for some reason I couldn't look away from him. His smile was one of pure satisfaction and happiness.

"I never thought I would be able to do that." he said quietly, but I knew he meant for me to hear him or he would have been quieter.

"I'm glad you did." I smiled at him as he nodded letting go of me, he grabbed my hand and walked over to his bed. I looked at him curiously, "What are you doing?"

"Its late you need to sleep now." he said pointing to his bed.

"No!" I said loudly, "Im not tired at all, I don't need to sleep!" I grabbed his arm and pouted.

"Joanna, though you look unbelievably cute, I must insist that you go to sleep." He kissed my hand and pulled his covers back for me.

I crossed my arms over my chest and shook my head, "I don't want to."

Jasper ran his hand over my cheek and smiled, "Someone as beautiful as you needs to get all the sleep they can get." I bit my lip slightly as his southern draw lightly came out.

I looked up at him and shook my head again, "I'm not going to bed Jasper Hale and there is nothing you can say or do that can make me!" I turned away from him.

Jasper laughed lightly, "You wanna bet Joanna McCarty?" I looked back at him and saw him smirking.

"Not with out your powers you can't." I said stuttering slightly and he raised an eyebrow.

"Oh yes I can." before I could speak he pushed me on his bed and sat down by me putting his hand over my stomach so if I tried to get up I wouldn't be able to move his arm. "Told you."

I growled and looked over at him, "I said you couldn't do it with out your powers!" I glared, "Your strength is a power." I knew it wasn't but he couldn't win.

"Don't even say that, every vampire has this kind of strength." he shook his head and moved his arm. "Remember I can catch you before you even get off the bed so don't try getting up."

I nodded and moved under the covers, with Jasper simply sitting close to me I felt the chill of his skin. "Did you call my mom?" I asked finally thinking of her.

"Yeah Bella asked of you could have a sleepover with them and she said it was ok." He said playing with my hair as he spoke.

"What's it like not sleeping at all?" I asked him, he stopped playing with my hair and thought for a moment.

"Well it's boring and lonely, or it was lonely." he smiled at me, "It's a good time to think about things, or I usually read, but its not anything cool or fun. The worst thing about the night is feeling the other emotions." I knew what he meant, and that would be bothersome. "There is no secrets in the house with the mind reading, future seeing, my emotion reading and the excellent hearing. In fact I'm 100% sure everyone in the house knows about our kiss."

I blushed a deep red and buried my face in the covers, "That's going to take some getting used to."

Jasper laughed slightly and nodded, "You will, its not that bad if you don't think about it." I nodded and rolled my eyes, it was his fault that I was thinking about it, "Joanna will you please go to sleep now?" Jasper asked as he moved away from me a bit. I didn't take it personally, I knew he couldn't be that close to me forever.

I yawned and smiled sheepishly, "I guess I am pretty tired."

Jasper nodded as I rolled over on my side to get comfortable, "I love you Joanna."

"I love you too." the smile on my face was huge as I felt him put his hand on my shoulder. Soon, weather it was me on my own or Jasper, I was asleep.

For once, my dreams of Jasper weren't about him being a monster… they were something else. We were in the middle of a forest, thick green moss was covering everything. The trees created a think canopy overhead blocking the sky completely. You could see rays of sunlight every so often through out the forest. It looked beautiful, I wish that I knew where it was, there was noting near my own home that looked like this. The roots of the giant trees were overlapping each other making a blanket over the ground. I could hear everything, every rustle of the leaves everything.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned around to see Jasper smiling as he looked at me. He looked different, it was like I was seeing him for the first time. He had crescent shaped markings all over his jaw and neck, even a few on his face. It didn't take me long to realize they were scars. Jasper grabbed my hand, and I smiled at him. He pulled me to him and wrapped his arms around me. I hugged him back then looked at him, his body wasn't cold, it felt like a normal humans would. His eyes were the same gold color as they always were.

"So beautiful." his voice was even more beautiful, his deep tone was musical, I could even hear the slight southern draw in his voice. He grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips. I stared at my hand, it was the same color as Jasper's. I was about to ask him what was going on then he started shaking me. I stared at him, what was he doing? "Wake up Joanna." as soon as he said that I sat up, and looked around.

"Your mom is calling." Jasper said handing me my phone.

I looked at it for a moment then answered, "Hello?"

"_Hey baby, you and Dominic need to come home now." _my mother sounded surprisingly happy.

"Can the Cullen's go to?" I asked, I wasn't very hopeful but I asked anyway.

My mother laughed, _"Oh I already asked Esme to come over!" _I looked at Jasper knowing he heard everything she was saying, he just shrugged.

"Um ok I'll go get Dom, he is with Jasper right now, you know doing crazy guy things." I saw Jasper rolled his eyes and smirked, "Maybe reading porn or something."

"_Joanna Lynn McCarty do not say things like that!" _I laughed and Jasper stood up and went to his closet.

I watched him as he did, "Yeah sorry mom, love you bye be home soon."

"_Bye sweetheart!" _I hung up the phone and Jasper laughed.

"Whats so funny porno man?" I asked sticking my tongue out at him.

"Well you said that to somehow make your mom mad at me or Dominic but it was a poorly executed plan. All it did was get you into trouble, showing you lack of on the spot planning skills." I could tell he was amused simply by the tone of his voice and the atmosphere around me. I had mouth the words he said mocking him the whole time he spoke, but he didn't see.

"Well sorry I didn't have military training that prepares me to think of plans right on the spot" I said pretending to be annoyed.

"Apology accepted ma'am but don't let it happen again." I mocked him again and glared at his back as he went through his closet. "Joanna don't think I'm stupid, I know what your doing." He looked back at me and smirked.

I blushed and buried my face in the pillow as I heard him laugh, "Jerk." I muttered not taking my face off the pillow.

"So I'm a jerk now hu?" he asked, I pulled my face off the pillow and nodded looking back at him. As soon as I did my blush grew to an extent that I had never thought was possible. Jasper was looking over at the clock not paying attention to me, but I was certainly paying attention to him… or a part of him. This was the first time I had seen Jasper with out his shirt on and believe me, I was not disappointed. I had no idea how muscular he truly was until now, I mean it was apparent just by looking at him that he was extremely muscular but nothing like this. His arms which were always hidden by long sleeve shirts were toned and defined, his arms were bigger than I thought. His chest was something else… his pecks were unbelievable but the only thing on my mind was abs. I had never even seen a guy with a six pack but I swear to God that Jasper had an eight pack. It wasn't only visible but unbelievably defined.

"Like what you see?" There was nothing but amusement in Jasper's voice as he looked at me holding his shirt.

I stared at him with my mouth wide open trying to find my words, "Um." was the only sound that came out of my mouth.

"I'll just take that as a yes." he smiled and pulled his shirt on then started buttoning it. As I watched him I remembered my dream, I wanted to ask him but I couldn't, "Just ask Joanna, don't be afraid."

"It's kind of personal… but it was in my dream last night." I bit my lip and sighed, "Do you have any… or a lot of scars."

Jasper stopped buttoning his shirt and looked at me, he looked out his window, "Yeah." was all he said. I knew then that he had a lot of scars.

"Um." I paused, "Can I see." I wasn't sure if that would have been a bad thing to ask. I noticed how he reacted to my first mention of it and I wasn't sure how this would go over.

"I don't know, I just… that's why I ware the shirts I do… to hide…" Jasper wasn't making complete sentences.

I shook my head, "I don't care about that Jasper… if that's what your worried about." Jasper sighed and walked over to his table and turned on the lamp, "If you want to see come here." his tone was flat as he spoke. I stood up and walked over to him, he pulled his sleeve up and held it close to the light. I looked closely at his arm, then I saw them. There were so many… they overlapped each other, some looked as if the had dragged across his skin.

"How?" I asked, I knew nothing could hurt a vampire, or so I thought.

Jasper looked down at me with his sleeve still rolled up, "They are bites, when one vampire bites another they leave these marks."

I gasped and looked at him, "Are you ok?" I asked grabbing his cold arm and ran my fingers over the scars.

He closed his eyes and smiled slightly, "I'm fine Joanna, that was a long time ago." Jasper looked down at me and smiled as he leaned down and kissed the side of my lips softly. My heart raced again and I felt the same butterflies. "I will never get tired of doing that."

I blushed and breathed out, "Neither will I." He smiled pulling his sleeve down and grabbed my hand.

"What time is it?" I asked squeezing his hand.

Jasper looked out at his clock and sighed, "You slept for a long time, its already three." I nodded, I guess I was really tired last night,

"Lets go." He said smiling as he lead me out of his room.

We walked down stairs and saw Dominic sitting with Alice watching tv, "When the hell did you get here?" I asked kicking his leg as I walked by.

He rubbed his leg and rolled my eyes, "Lat night, when else would I have got here?"

"Smart ass." I muttered as I heard Emmett's laughter, I looked back and saw him talking to Rosalie when he jumped over the edge of the stairs. Rose rolled her eyes but smiled none the less, it was clear she acted like his childlike antics annoyed her when in reality she highly enjoyed them.

"So I head you got some action last night Jasper!" Emmett yelled as I buried my face in the back of his shirt.

"Emmett grow up, I did no such thing." Jasper put his arm around my back. I looked up at him slightly and it was clear he was annoyed.

"Yeah well you still kissed her." He shrugged as Rosalie walked in front of him and hissed quietly.

"That I did, there is no problem with that." I smiled slightly and moved back a bit.

"I swear Emmett you have no subtlety." Edward said walking in with Bella, who smiled at his comment.

"So what?" Emmett looked over at him, "There is no problem speaking your mind!" I laughed slightly at the look on his face. I guess no matter how stupid Emmett's comments were I would always find them funny.

"Aw baby sister had her first kiss." I glared at Dominic as he spoke, "What?" he asked.

""Have you been kissed before?" I asked smirking, I knew the answer was no.

"Yes!" He paused, "Maybe… ok no." I smirked and nodded as Jasper put his hand on my shoulder.

"Exactly what I thought, so shut up." I heard Emmett snicker behind me and even Alice laughed.

"You're a little monster Joanna. " Edward said as he sat down, I guessed we were waiting for Carlisle and Esme. "Carlisle and Esme should be here soon, they were picking things up at the store." Bella sat in Edwards lap and grabbed the remote from Alice. "What do you want to watch?" she asked everyone.

"Spongebob!" Emmett, Dominic and I yelled at the same time as Jasper looked

down at me laughing to himself.

Bella shrugged, "Spongebob it is." when she found the channel it was on, my favorite episode was on, The Best Day Ever. The first time I had seen this episode the song had been stuck in my head all day. We were at the part when Spongebob given Squidward his tooth for a reed when Carlisle and Esme showed up.

"Wow, we left and nothing is broken, im surprised." Esme said smiling as she walked in. "Oh hello Joanna, are you feeling better dear?" She asked putting her bag down.

I nodded and smiling, it strangely meant a lot to me that she cared, "Yeah I'm fine, thanks."

"Well nothing was physically wrong with you except for bruises on your arms but Jasper wouldn't leave me alone until I checked over you better." I looked over at Jasper as Carlisle spoke I could tell that he didn't really want me knowing about that but I liked it.

"Well we are ready to go ." Dominic said standing up with his arm wrapped around Alice's shoulders.

On the drive back home Dominic and Alice rode with Edward and Bella, and of course Carlisle and Esme rode alone. Leaving me of course with Jasper Emmett and Rosalie. Emmett Kept bugging Jasper asking him what is was like to touch someone after being alone so long. Which of course made me blush but Rosalie kept talking to me, trying to make me ignore the guys battle. She was talking about a new car she wanted or really the new engine she wanted.

I was curious about why my mom sounded so happy on the phone, when we got to the house there was nothing different, nothing out of place, I shrugged to myself, she was probably having another party later today. We got out of the car and all went inside. Jasper suddenly smiled and grabbed my hand. I looked up at him confused but he just smiled and led me in the house. My mother was in the kitchen baking, I looked around she had a cake and two pies done already, yeah party. "I have a surprise for you two!" she said smiling a smile I had never seen my mother smile as she looked at Dominic and I.

I rolled my eyes, I knew it was a party but I played along, "Oh wow mom what is it?" my voice was dripping with sarcasm and Dominic stomped on my foot.

I wanted for my mother to get mad but she just smiled, "Well kid you only get one guess." My eyes widened and my mouth fell open at the sound of the voice. I couldn't feel my heart and tears were already filling my eyes as I turned around.

"Daddy!" I yelled as I looked a his smiling face. I ran over to him and jumped on him as he picked me up. Tears were streaming down my face as I clung to him for dear life, I was afraid that he wasn't really there. There was nothing like this feeling, having my dad back was just an amazing feeling. I couldn't even feel my heart but I knew it was beating by the pounding in my chest.

"Hey baby girl." He smoothed my hair and held me to tightly, I felt his tears on my shoulder. He put me down and smiled kissing my forehead as I hugged him again, I wasn't going to let go of him yet, I couldn't bring myself to. After all this time my dad was back and he was safe. I can't count the times I had thought about him being dead some where or hurt, but here he was in one piece, safe and back where he belongs, home.

I pulled away from him and looked back at Dominic, he was looking down, but I knew he was crying. I always knew when he was upset, it was the special connection we had. Another thing I knew was that Dominic wasn't going to let my father know he was crying or anyone else. "Dominic." His voice broke as he said my brothers name.

I saw Dominic shake and he looked up, tears stained his face as looked at our dad. Right now he didn't care who was watching, he didn't care if they called him weak or anything, he ran over to dad and hugged him as my father did the same. I stood there smiling as I watched them still crying. My mom walked over to me and hugged me as we watched them.

When my dad let go of Dominic I moved back over to him as he put his arm around me. He straightened up and looked at the Cullen's, my father was a big man, he was as tall as Jasper, and had about the same build as him. As I looked at him and Emmett it was plain to see that they were related, They had the same hair color and there hair had the same curls. They had the same face shape, same nose, everything seemed to be the same. My dad looked like my grandpa and my grandpa looked like his older brother Emmett. There was no doubt that Emmett was seeing his brother in my father, you could tell by the look on his face, I saw Rosalie grab his hand and smile.

"General Henry McCarty, nice to meet you all." He said nodding looking at all of them. I smiled a bit as I saw Jasper stand up straight, I knew he was showing respect to my father, he must have felt like he was talking to his superior.

Carlisle was the first to speak, he stuck out his hand as my father shook it smiling, "Nice to meet you as well, this is my family. My wife Esme, and my children, Bella, Edward, Emmett Rosalie, Alice and Jasper." My fathers eyes feel on Jasper, "So you're the Jasper I have heard so much about." I looked back at my mom who shrugged and smiled.

Jasper nodded looking at him, "Yes sir." I raised my eyebrows as he spoke, I was feeling amused and I knew Jasper was amused himself as his eyes flashed to me.

"And Alice, I have heard about you as well." He smiled as she nodded smiling at him, it was impossible not to like her. "Well I like you." he looked at Jasper and shook his head "I don't like you thought."

"Henry!" She said loudly as I looked up at him shocked. I could tell that most of the Cullen's were shocked as well but Jasper was smiling.

"Ok, ok, he's fine… I just don't like him with Joanna." He said looking at Jasper who stopped smiling and nodded. "Can I talk to you for a minute boy?"

I looked at my father, he had just gotten here and he was already wanting to talk to Jasper! "No!" I said loudly grabbing his arm.

"I don't mind sir." Jasper said sending a calming wave towards me. My dad put his hand on Jasper's back and led him into my his den.

I put my hands in my hair, "Oh God kill me!" I groaned as my mother patted my back and went back to cooking.

"Could you use some help?" Esme asked my mom as her and Carlisle walked past me.

I never heard her reply because I walked up to my room, but I knew it was going to be a yes. I didn't want my father talking to Jasper, I didn't really know why but I really didn't. When I got in my room I laid down on my bed, for some reason I liked Jasper's bed more. Alice, Bella and Rosalie followed me in, but when Emmett tried to walk in Rosalie pushed him out.

"Sorry babe no boys allowed!" She said closing the door in his face. She turned back to me and smiled, "So what all happened last night?"

I looked at them all for a moment, I knew it would be something like this, "What do you mean?" I asked playing dumb.

"Oh don't be stupid!" Bella laughed looking at me.

"We all know you kissed him because of what he said to Emmett, but we don't have Edwards power and he doesn't really share guy things with us, just Emmett, which is why he knows." Rosalie explained smirking as I blushed.

"Oh come on Joanna, just tell us!" Alice piped in smiling in a way that only she could.

"Well, I don't know what to say really…" I looked at my hands, "He kissed me." I smiled a bit.

"Well we know that!" Alice said laughing a bit. "Tell us how it happened and like what did you feel!"

I looked around, Alice was sitting on her knees in a beanbag chair, Bella was seated in my computer chair and Rosalie was sitting next to me on my bed. I felt for once accepted, they all had smiles on there faces as they looked at me. I smiled, this was where I belonged, with the Cullen's. They accepted me and for the first time, I had true friends. All the girls really wanted to know about what happened, it was girl talk… something I had never been a part of but I loved it.

"Well at first it wasn't good." I paused, in my mind this already sounded bad so I fixed it. "I mean it wasn't anything bad it just." I stopped my self and shook my head , this was harder than I imagined.

"Whoa!" Rosalie laughed putting her hand on my shoulder, "He said he kissed you, he didn't say he had sex with you!"

My eyes widened as I shook my head vigorously with a blush the size of Texas. "She is joking Joanna calm down." Alice said as I looked over at Rosalie frowning only to meet her smile.

"Well he was like debating things, that were bad." I lightly touched my neck and they understood. "But the whole time he was… touching me, but not in a bad way." I added at the end. "Just in a way that he had never done before."

Bella laughed and shook her head, "Don't be so shy! There is nothing wrong with what happened."

I nodded, "Then he was really sweet and held my hand and let me sit in his lap." I smiled thinking of the things he told me. I wasn't going to tell them that, that was mine, and no one but the people who already knew were going to know. "Then he said he wanted to be able to be more physical with me, like be closer, he started saying all these things about how he couldn't." I bit my lip smiling, "Then well he kissed me."

"Well what was it like?" Alice said practically jumping up on her knees.

"It was magical, it was like oh my God." I laughed and smiled, "I felt like butterflies in my stomach and it was just amazing!" I lied back on my bed as I heard them all laugh.

"So that really was your first kiss?" Rosalie asked smiling, for once that wasn't said as a bad thing.

"Yeah, and it was so perfect I wouldn't change anything it was beyond perfect!" I almost yelled the end.

"That's how I felt with Edward… but I kinda messed up." she laughed a bit and sighed. I knew if I ever really talked to Bella in depth about her relationship with Edward while she was a human then I was sure there would be great similarities but I knew there would be differences as well, in fact there would be a lot of differences, but I felt it would be good to talk to her.

"Wow, its great to hear this, Jasper has always kept to himself, even when it was just me and him." Alice said smiling, I could tell she was really happy for Jasper. She had known him longer than anyone here and it was I guess refreshing to her for him to be like this.

"So Alice why haven't you kissed Dominic?" Bella asked looking at her a bit surprised.

"I'm waiting for him to kiss me, but it will be soon." Her smile was big as she nodded.

"Of course, all you have to do is wait for him do finally do it!" I said as she nodded.

"So what was your first kiss with Emmett like?" I asked Rosalie who looked at me and smiled.

She moved around and put her legs on top of mine, "Well we were sitting in the living room, everyone else had gone hunting. He had just killed a human and he thought Carlisle would make him leave and I was trying to convince him that Carlisle wasn't like that but he didn't believe me. He was bout to leave because he didn't want to be kicked out and I grabbed his hand pulling him back and he looked a me then he just picked me up and kissed me!" I smiled, I liked that story. I could tell it meant a lot to Rose and it was really sweet.

Alice grabbed the remote and turned on my tv, she flipped through the tv until she found a movie she liked, "The Notebook." this was my favorite movie ever, the story was amazing and no matter how many times I saw it I cried. We watched that movie then we watched an episode of Chowder and Flapjack.

"The guys are coming." Alice said looking at the door as Flapjack ended.

"So can we come in or is it still girl time?" Emmett said from behind the door.

"The others can come in but you cant!" Rosalie said smirking as Emmett opened the door and walked in with Edward, Dominic and Jasper coming in behind him.

I stood up pushing Rosalie's legs off of me running over to Jasper, "What did he say to you!" I asked loudly grabbing his shirt.

He laughed and moved my hands, "Nothing really." He walked over to my bed and sat down.

"Oh don't you nothing really me what the hell did you talk about!" I asked as I heard Emmett laugh as he looked at Jasper who was looking at my wall.

"I didn't think you would have hung that up." Jasper said looking at his painting. I groaned as I mentally made a death threat to Jasper. Edward laughed lightly from his place of the floor next to Bella. "Of course I did but that is not the point quit avoiding my questions!"

"Joanna dear stop, I will tell you some other time ok?" he smiled at me. He was having fun torturing me, I knew he was you could tell by the look on his stupid beautiful face.

"Don't Joanna dear me!" said grabbing his hand trying to pull him up. "And get out of my room!"

Jasper laughed and pulled me in his lap with no effort at all, "Down kitty, that one bites." I glared at Emmett who was looking away as if he didn't say anything.

"Oh Emmett your so funny!" my voice was dripping with sarcasm as I looked at him. Jasper had me in his lap in an uncomfortable position, my head was against his chest and my legs were on my chest.

I turned around and looked around my room, Emmett was sitting by Rosalie on my bed with her head on his shoulder, Alice and Dominic were back to back leaning on each other as they held hands. Edward as holding Bella's hand as he sat on the floor next to her chair. Nothing was better than this moment, I didn't feel awkward looking at them for the first time.

My Jasper was able to be close to me and it felt really good. I was proud of him, I know it might sound strange but I was, I knew how hard it was for him to even be in the same room as me. I never asked him to do more and I never expected more, I was happy he would talk to me, but he pushed himself to do more. I was proud of him because he worked hard and did things uncomfortable for him just to make me happy, and honestly I wouldn't care if he stopped having any physical contact with me as long as he still loved me.

"What you were just thinking is something I have never heard anyone say or think ever, and it is probably one of the nicest things anyone could say." I looked at Edward and smiled, I was glad he liked me more now. Well I didn't think he had anything against me he just never talked to me.

Everyone looked at us confused but they didn't say anything, I guess they were used to it. I laid my head back on Jasper's chest and smiled, he put his arm around my waist but when he did he hit my hip, I groaned in pain and stood up. "What the hell?" Jasper asked as he stood up as I did. I looked around, everyone was tense, they thought Jasper hurt me now. "Nothing you surprised me." I laughed nervously trying to hide what was really wrong.

Jasper looked around and then growled lightly grabbing my arm pulling me out of the room. He walked down the hall and stopped at the bathroom and led me in closing the door behind him locking it. "Show me." His tone was angry and he was shaking. I knew he was mad at himself this time, it was clear he knew why I was hurt, but he was still scaring me. "Joanna I will look myself if you don't show me." His eyes were full of pain as he looked at my hips.

I sighed and undid my pants pulling them down on one side showing him. I had no idea how it looked, I had never bothered to look because I didn't want to but I couldn't stop myself from looking now. Black hand print was on my hip, it was a perfect hand print and I had never seen a bruise that color. Jasper growled loudly and then pulled the other side down as well, it was an exact replica.

"Jasper." My voice was barely a whisper as he growled clenching his fists looking at my hips.

Fear was in the front of my mind, I didn't care if he made to much noise, I didn't care if anyone heard him, hell I didn't even care that my pants were practically at my knees I was just afraid. "Why didn't you tell me!" he yelled as I flinched taking a step away from him.

"I didn't want this to happen." I didn't look at him, I didn't want to. Jasper put his arms on ether side of my head and looked down at me.

"You have no idea how much I could have hurt you!" He said thou gritted teeth. I looked at him and I knew if he could cry he would have been. I put my hand on his arm and he shook his head, "Not now Joanna, I need to hunt now. Go tell the others that I have to hunt." I nodded as he moved away from me. " he touched my cheek lightly and then he was gone just like that.

I pulled my pants up and wiped the tears from my eyes as I felt happiness fill me. Even thought he needed to hunt, Jasper was still there for me. I walked back into my room and Edward put his hand on my back. "Don't worry, he will be back later." Dominic walked out with Alice probably to go to his own room. I laid down on my bed and sighed.

"Joanna." I looked up at the sound of Emmett's voice. It was a surprise to me that he didn't go with the others but he looked sad as he looked at me. "He looks just like him." I sat up as I realized what he was talking about, "My grandpa, yeah he does." I whispered as Emmett sat down next to me.

Emmett looked down at his hands, "Did any of them ever talk about me?" I wasn't sure how to answer him, which would hurt more, the truth or the lie.

I decided on telling the truth, "My grandpa would always tell me about how much fun he would have with his big brother, and then once day he was just gone. No body nothing." I took a deep breath as I spoke, "Almost every time he would talk about you he would cry, you were so strong, and so smart and funny, you were his hero."

Emmett growled and pulled his hair as he put his head on his knees, "All because I was stupid!" He let go of his hair and put his head on the wall and closed his eyes. "If I didn't have to be a show off then I would have been with my family."

I looked at him, I wasn't sure what to say to him. "He always told me that he didn't think you were dead," Emmett looked at me surprised. "He told me he wasn't sure what really happened but he always thought that you were alive, im sure he still thinks that."

"Still?" He sat up straight as he spoke, "You mean he is still alive?"

"Yeah he is, why?" I guess he was just surprised that his brother was still alive.

He was looking at the ground, it was clear that he was debating on what he was going to say. "Do you think I could see him?" he looked at me.

I wasn't sure if it would be possible for his family to let him do that but I thought it would be a good idea. "Well, I think it would be a great idea. I mean he never told anyone but me that he thought you were alive, so if he saw you he wouldn't tell anyone." I smiled. I knew both Emmett and my grandfather were going to like this.

"Now I just have to convince my family to let it happen." He smiled and nodded, "Thanks Joanna."

"Well that's what family is for right?" I said smiling. He nodded and hugged me and then waved as he jumped out my window.

I laughed and walked down stairs, my mom and dad were in the kitchen talking and Dominic walked down stairs and stood next to me. I laid my head on his arm and smiled as tears came to my eyes. For the first time in so long we were a family, just as everything should be.

**Ok so thats that chapter I hope again that theres not to much in this chapter and once again I am asking for the help of my readers!What should be the main conflict of this story? Should it be another vampire, something different what should it be!For this question please DO NOT PUT IT IN A REVIEW!!! I want you to message me what you think please I will look at the ones in reviews but the chance of you being the once chosen will be very small! And the person who comes up with the winning idea will get credit for it so yeah please help me!**


	17. Pedophile

**Ok wow i think this might be the fastest Ive updated! lol Any way I have decided a few things on this story! OK it will be divided up into three different stories so when this is over i promise there will be at least two more!! So I picked the conflict but its not gogin in this story it is going in the second one and the person who gave me the idea is Scorpio21 ok you guys thank her big time!! ok for outside news im writing a new story that i am so excited for i hope you all read it and for my "Bella's sleepover with the cullens"... I am working on part two!! Any way this is my fluffy chapter, this is the last time you will see all this lovey dovey stuff for a while so take it in when you read I hope you all love it! **

Dominic put his arm around my shoulder as we watched my mom and dad. I had never seen my mom happier in my life, she was giggling and blushing just like a school girl. They were kissing lightly and holding hands, they were both so happy. I thought it was hard for me to have my dad gone, but I guess I never really thought about how my mom felt about him not being here. My mom and dad had been married since they were 19 and that separation must have been horrible. I mean I hated it when Jasper was absent from school and I haven't been with him that long.

"Hey guys!" My mom said smiling as put down something she was making and hugged us both and smiled. "Dinner is ready."I smiled bigger than ever as she said that, it might not seem like much but I hadn't heard from my dad in two years and suddenly he was back having dinner with us. I sat down next to Dominic as my mom put out the food.

I didn't say anything I was just taking in the moment watching my father, "So Dominic, Alice seems nice, tell me about her." My dad was smiling as he looked at Dom.

"She is, she is always smiling and loves to talk." he laughed. "She is sweet dad she really is." Dominic started eating and kept his eyes on his food. I knew nothing was wrong he was really shy when it came to talking about anything like this, even with me.

My dad nodded, "She seems to be." he looked at me and I looked over my shoulder and bit my lip. "Well Jasper seems to be an ok guy, he was born in Houston, in the same hospital I was as a matter of fact." I smiled, I don't think Jasper knew how many points that scored with my dad. "So I guess he is an ok guy, so what's he like alone?"

"He's nice and he's always a gentlemen, he always makes me feel important no matter what." I smiled, it was the truth. My father nodded but frowned, my mother put her hand on mine and I knew why. She was letting me know that he really didn't have anything against Jasper.

The rest of dinner passed smoothly, my dad would ask us about school and any new things we did. The only thing that bothered me was that my dad kept asking about Alice, and he said nothing about Jasper. I know its silly but the less he talked about Jasper the more I thought I was doing something wrong. I was starting to think my dad really didn't like Jasper.

After dinner I went up stairs to change, I got dressed in my black boy shorts and my purple "Nightmare before Christmas" tank top. I looked out my window looking for Jasper but he wasn't there. I sighed and laid down on my bed when I heard my door open, I looked to see who it was. Dominic was dressed in his black and red Green Day pajama pants and a white under shirt. He laid down on my bed with his head at my feet.

"What you need Dom?" I asked looking up at my ceiling which was covered in drawings I had done.

"I wanted to know if you were ok." I looked at him confused, "Alice told me about your hips." he sounded ashamed to admit that he knew.

"I'm fine, he didn't mean to, you know that." I shrugged, it had been a long time since Dominic and I had talked like this.

"I know he doesn't mean to, but he hurts you a lot." I felt my anger grow, was he really about to lecture me? "No, I'm not saying anything bad, I just want to make sure your ok. I mean we haven't really talked like this in a while."

I smiled and nodded, "Dominic Jasper loves me, he doesn't mean to hurt me. I mean doesn't Alice ge a little out of control sometimes?" I asked as I started poking his hand.

"Not really, I mean it gets to much but if it does she walks away for a second And then comes back to me." I felt him moving as he spoke. He said it as if my situation was the same as his.

I furred my brow and bit my lip, "Jasper never does that." I said quietly, "He always gets mad and looses control of himself." I sat up and thought for a moment, "Maybe Jasper doesn't love me as much as he says he does."

Dominic hit me in the arm a bit hard as he sat up, I looked at him and rubbed my arm, "Joanna you know damn well that's not true!" I looked at him shocked. "Fuck Jo, I could tell that he loved you this earlier, and Alice says he never shuts up about you!" I looked at him, "Jasper never told me that he talked about me." I looked at my hands.

"Of course he isn't going to tell you he talks about you all the time!" he laughed a bit "No matter how old he is he is still a guy, if he told you that it would be… girly I guess."

I laughed at him as he rolled his eyes, "Girly, yeah." I scoffed smiling as we both laid down at the same time. I grabbed his hand and smiled. I loved Dominic, he was really a part of me and I couldn't be without him.

"So… um I've been thinking about something." He laughed at himself, "I think I want to kiss Alice but you know, I'm not sure if she wants me to." I laughed to myself, "I really think you should, I'm sure she wants you to."

I sat up as he looked at me and nodded, "I guess so, thanks Jo." He said standing up.

I hugged him and he hugged me back and he went to walk to his room. Before he could open the door my dad opened it, Dominic jumped back a bit and rolled his eyes as my dad laughed, "Sorry kid, you going to bed?" he asked as Dominic nodded. My dad patted him on the back and he walked out.

"What's up dad?" I asked sitting back on my bed. I was still a bit convinced that my dad didn't like Jasper.

"I want to talk to you about Jasper, your mom said that I might have given you the impression that I don't like Jasper." He sat down in the chair and looked at me.

I sat up in my bed and looked at him, "Yeah, well you did come out and say it right in front of him." I started chipping the nail polish off my nails.

"Well, I don't like him." He said bluntly, I rolled my eyes and started chipping it off furiously. "But not for the reason you think."

I didn't look at him I just kept chipping my nail polish, "Why don't you like him then?" I asked simply to amuse him.

He cleared his throat, "Its because he is a guy."

I scoffed, interrupting him as I spoke. "Oh yeah dad that's so not what I thought your reason was!"

"Joanna you shut up and let me finish!" he said scolding me. He watched me for a few minutes as I still stared at my nails, "You're my little girl Jo, you know that. So when I come back after two years the first time I see you your have your new." He stopped, "Boyfriend." he looked uncomfortable saying boyfriend.

"Yeah dad, maybe if you would have called or wrote or something I could tell you I had a boyfriend and I wouldn't have been such a surprise." I looked at him angrily. I couldn't stop what I said as I felt my anger growing.

"I couldn't call you, I have been in almost constant fighting and meetings." My dad grabbed my hand, "You know that I wanted to talk to you, I was thinking about you the whole time, you and Dominic."

"For two years dad!" I yelled as hot tears spilt out of my eyes, " You couldn't even find a minute to call, I'm sure there were times when you could have called! Mom has been a wreak the whole time, she didn't know that Dominic and I were being bullied until I got beat up, she thought everything was fine! They weren't fine dad, there still not!" I clenched my fists together tightly as I heard my father say something, but I wasn't listing. "Before the Cullen's came Dominic and I had no one, the people at school called us names and treated us horribly because we were different! They still do dad, but when they came they talked to us, they didn't care how we dressed or anything. We are treated so bad, and mom wouldn't listen so when I needed to talk to you, I couldn't."

"Sweetheart you still could have talked to your mom, you know that." he hugged me and I cried and hugged him back. "Joanna I love you, I'm sorry you have to know I tried to call you."

"I love you to dad." I held onto him, he was always going to be the person that I could talk to. No matter how long it had been since I had seen him he was always there for me and he always would be.

"So, tell me about Jasper, I know that there is more than just what you told me at dinner." I sat back down and he sat in his chair smiling.

I went on and told him everything about Jasper that I could, leaving out anything that could let my dad know he's a vampire. The whole time my dad kept a strong face the whole time however there were a few times when I could tell he didn't like what he heard. The time I could see it most was when I told my dad that I was in love with Jasper. My dad seemed impressed by Jasper's hummer, but hell who wouldn't be.

The last thing I told my dad was that Jasper had bought me something, "Well I want to see it!" he said putting his hands on his knees.

"Dad no, its nothing important really." I lied. That necklace was my favorite thing in the world.

"I don't care what it is, he got it for you I want to see it." My dad was smiling as he looked at me.

I stood up and sighed, _"Oh God I hope he doesn't know how much jewelry costs." _I thought as I opened my jewelry box and got out the large box that held the necklace. Slowly I opened it, I had forgotten how beautiful it was as I ran my finger tips over the diamonds.

"How much was that!" he asked loudly grabbing the box. He was looking at it in awe as he looked at me.

"I don't know how much it costs, he got it without me there, or even knowing about it." I admitted biting my lip looking down.

"Well, its beautiful, that's for sure." He took it out of the box and motioned for me to go over to him. He put it around my neck and smiled, "It looks better on you." He laughed then looked at them time, "Well its ten you need to get some sleep." He said

I hugged him as he kissed my head, "Night daddy."

"Night Jojo." He said walking out of my room closing the door behind him.

I smiled and looked at the door, I was so happy he had came in here. I love my dad, he was my best friend, I knew that for most girls it was there moms that were there best friends, but it just wasn't that way. I had never been close with my mom, it was always my dad. I looked in the mirror touching my necklace, it did look good. I had never had anything that was anywhere near this expensive or this beautiful. The way the light hit the diamonds made them shine on the walls, I smiled playing with one of the diamonds on the necklace.

"I forgot just how beautiful it is on you." I jumped and turned around. I put my hand over my heart as I looked at Jasper. He was sitting in my window, one leg was hanging in my room and he was sort of sitting on the other. He was leaning on the window seal smiling lightly. The moon was hitting his hair forming a silver halo around his head. He looked truly like a god, there was nothing special about the way he was sitting or anything like that, but to me it was amazing.

"Hey Jasper." I said quietly. I was still holding the diamond as he stood up lightly brushing off his pants.

He silently walked across the room, I closed my eyes as he ran his cold fingers over the necklace smiling slightly to himself. He moved his and up my neck and over my jaw. I felt myself trembling, but I wasn't scared, and he obviously knew that. Soon he moved both hands to my face. His long fingers trailed over my lips as he can all of his fingers over my mouth. He moved his fingers over my jaw again, letting his fingers linger on my neck. I opened my eyes and he smiled removing his hands.

"So beautiful, I knew it was made for you the moment I saw you looking at it." I smiled and reached back to take it off. Jasper grabbed my hands and turned my around slowly unhooking the necklace. "Here you go." He put it in my hand. I put it up and looked back at him.

"So, did you hunt enough?" I asked walking over to my bed sitting down.

Jasper looked at me for a moment then shook his head, "No, but I can never hunt enough to be around you truly so its fine." I stared at him curiously for both his look and what he said.

"Your really close to your dad aren't you?" he asked sitting next to me on the bed. "I was watching you with him a minute ago, I hope that doesn't make you mad. I'm simply curious on how you act when I'm not around."

Most people would have found that creepy but due to my flawed mind I blushed, "No, I don't mind." I looked at my hands as if they had suddenly became the most entertaining things. "Yeah I am, he's like my best friend, I tell him like everything." I smiled as I spoke. Jasper nodded then I looked at him kind of wide eyed, "I'm not going to tell him about you being a vampire, I would never tell that!"

Jasper put his hand over my mouth and laughed, "Joanna, Now I never thought you were going to so stop." I looked at him annoyed and then smirked, I opened my mouth and licked his hand. He pulled it away and looked at his hand then to me, "That was weird." he was smiling but I wasn't reacting to what he said because for some reason… his hand tasted good, a little sweet. Ok yeah I'm crazy.

"Sorry." I was looking at his hand, he raised his hand to his mouth and licked his palm. I didn't say anything just watched him in shock, I didn't expect him to do that and I couldn't imagine why he did it.

He looked at his palm for a moment then put his hand down and looked back at me, "You have nothing to be sorry for, its silly for you to apologize." I nodded as he seemed to be deep in thought.

He seemed distant now and I wasn't sure why, it was as if his body was here but his mind was somewhere else. "Jasper, are you ok, do you need to hunt more or something?" I put my hand on his strong arm and he quickly looked at me.

"No, I'm just trying to figure out what secrete you have from me." I looked at him shocked. I had no secrets from him as far as I could remember, I told him everything. "Rosalie said you told her something a long time ago, I asked her what but she wouldn't tell me, she said it would be like giving away a secrete. I know the part about me but there is more I know it."

I nodded, my "sight" I forgot I hadn't told him about that, "Its not really a secret, its just something I have only told Rosalie." he was looking at me as if I was about to say the most interesting thing in the world. "Well, I see things. At first it was just like spirits of people's past lives behind them, but recently I actually see them randomly, even if there is no one around.." I sighed, "But when I see any of you, well not Bella, I see you as you were in your best and worst times."

Jasper grabbed my hand and kissed it lightly, he was still watching me with the same intrigued expression, "Tell me what you see."

I looked at him as he held my hands to his lips, "With Carlisle its him as he would be I guess when ever he was born in the 1600's or something, then he changes to, being scared and he looks like he is a vampire but his eyes are red…" I trailed on telling him about how I saw the others then about other people. I was afraid that by the end of my little speech that he would be freaked out but I guess I forgot that he was a vampire.

"I'm sorry you have to see all that, I really am." Jasper ran his finger over my lips again.

I looked at him for a moment, "Why do you always touch my lips?" he seemed to always touch my lips, I wasn't complaining, I was just wondering why.

Jasper looked at me for a second then he smiled slightly, "I don't really know." he laughed quietly, "I think about your lips a lot, there really soft." Jasper moved his hands away from my lips then looked at me from head to toe.

I blushed a bright red as he smirked still looking at me. "What?" I asked trying to hide the blush and my embarrassment as I remembered what I was wearing.

"I like the view." He said smirking as I turned away from him with a squeak. I definitely was not used to this, but I had never worn anything like this. "Why are you embarrassed?" he asked leaning down putting his arm around me.

"Your making fun of me." I whispered hugging myself. I wasn't really sure if he was making fun of me but I felt oddly self conches under his gaze.

He turned me around and held both of my hands at my sides, "How could I make fun you? You look so…" he bit his lip then shook his head. "Never mind." he said letting go of my hands.

I looked at him curiously then smiled, he was embarrassed now, "No no no, tell me, what do you want to say!" This was simply to good to pass up, I had a feeling I wouldn't see him embarrassed much.

"Nice, ok I was going to say nice." He looked away from me and walked over to my window looking out it concentrating.

"If you were thinking nice then I'm a sugar plum fairy!" I said putting my hands on my hips looking up at him smirking.

He looked at me then raised an eyebrow, "I know it wasn't what I was thinking but last I checked I was quite a bit older then you, I don't have to tell you anything." His smirk grew now as he patted the top of my head.

I glared at him for a second then smiled evilly, "I'd watch saying that if I was you." I put my hands behind my back then looked away from him biting the inside of my lip.

"And why is that little one?" He asked still smiling as he sat down in my chair.

I smirked and he looked at me strangely as amusement filled me, "You're a pedophile."

"What!" He said loudly. Jasper's face was priceless, his mouth was open and he was sitting up straight in the chair. "Now I'm really not telling you!" he sat back in the chair with his eyebrow slightly raised as an almost indivisible smirk on his face.

I stomped my foot and pouted, "Jasper don't do that tell me!" He smiled a toothy grin. "Please, I'm sorry I won't say it again." I whined looking at him.

"I guess I might tell you." He bit his lip slightly and I could tell that he was amused by the look in his eyes. "I was thinking… sexy." He whispered the last part looking at me gauging my reaction.

I blushed a ferocious red as he spoke, I had never been called beautiful, let alone sexy, it was weird. However there was no denying that I liked him calling me that, in fact it made me feel kind of strange, in a good way. I wasn't sure how I was suppose to have reacted but Jasper didn't seem to be let down by it. He stood up from the chair and walked to me as I watched him. His hand found mine and he brought it up to his lips kissing it. I watched him take a deep breath and he smiled.

"If I would have known you would feel this way about me saying that I would have done it sooner." I could tell he was still feeling the air around him. At that moment I wished I had his powers, I had no idea how I was feeling exactly yet he did.

"What am I feeling?" my voice was surprisingly quiet even to my ears.

I was slightly embarrassed to have to ask about my own feelings but I was really curious, "Well." he paused and looked up, "Your feeling very wanted, adored, worthy, embarrassed, loved, and genuinely happy." I smiled and slowly put my head on his chest as he held me.

"I'm not sure what I'm feeling most of the time…" I admitted looking at nothing as I spoke.

Jasper ran his fingers through my hair as he spoke, "You know you can just ask me, I always know." He looked down at me, I could see the dark shade of his eyes, "I can always feel your emotions Joanna, don't forget that." He let go of me and sar back down in the chair.

I wasn't mad or upset, I knew he wasn't able to be close all the time and I was thankful I got what I did, "It's kinda embarrassing asking what I'm feeling."

Jasper looked at me and shook his head, "Don't be, my siblings do it all the time. They will ask me to tell them what there feeling or to change how there feeling if they don't like how there feeling. So don't feel bad kitten."

I smiled and looked at him as I sat down on my bed, "Can you sit with me or not now?" I looked at him and moved over making room for him if he wanted or was able to take it. He didn't say anything he just stood up and sat next to me making sure not to touch me. "I guess I can try to ask you if I want to know what I'm feeling."

He nodded and put his hand on mine, he wasn't talking still. He traced my blood veins with his long cold fingers. I was afraid he was going to leave when he grabbed my hand. Then he looked at me then at our hands as he rubbed the back of my hand with his thumb

"I have to admit something to you Joanna." As he spoke I looked at him concerned, I wasn't sure I wanted to know what he was going to admit. "I told you I watched you with your dad earlier, well that's not the only time." my eyes widened, what had he heard me say? "I always watch you and listen to you, I've been listening all day, to everything you've said."

"What did you hear?" I asked. There was no way I wanted him to know about some of the things I said about him. I mean they were never mean but they were just things I didn't want him to know.

"There are two things that struck my interests." His expression was confusing like he was part happy and part hurt. "How could you think I don't love you Joanna?"

That was the thing I was hoping he didn't hear me say. My heart was pounding as I looked at him, I took a deep breath and shrugged. "I don't know." I bit the tips of my fingers which was a bad habit I had when I was nervous or placed in a situation I didn't like. "I guess I'm afraid that you would be a bit more controlled if you loved me… or well loved me for more than my blood." I put my face in my hands. I knew he was going to leave now, he was going to "get mad at himself" then leave saying he will see me tomorrow.

"You think I only love you for your blood?" Jasper voice was somber as he stared blankly ahead of him. I looked over at him, I had never seen him look like he did at this moment. "I haven't been doing my job, at all. The only thing I want to do right now is prove to you that you are more than your blood, so much more. You are the most important thing to me, I never thought that I had let you still think that. I know in the beginning you would think that but I thought you that I want you for so much more." no words could even begin to describe my feelings as he spoke, my breath was stuck in my throat. "Joanna you are my mate, my present, my future, my eternity!"

I felt tears coming to my eyes as he grabbed my hands and looked at me. His eyes were so full of love, he had never looked at me like that. I cried as I buried my face in his chest. He tensed up slightly yet he didn't push me away or anything. I held onto him so tightly my fingers hurt but I didn't care and he didn't ether. He slowly wrapped his arms around me and kissed my head, I had no way to describe the way I felt. I was being consumed by my own love for Jasper but at the time he was making me feel his love. He grabbed my face gently holding my chin then softly kissed my shaking lips.

I couldn't speak, this kiss meant more to me than anything else he had done, I couldn't figure out why but honestly it did. "I'm sorry I thought that Jasper." I said as I laid my head on his chest still holding him.

"I know you are, but you shouldn't think that. I love you I've told you, I learned my lesson with telling someone you love then if you don't." He grabbed my hands and moved them. "You will hurt yourself Joanna."

I looked at my hands then smiled at him nodding. My fingers were already sore and I had no intentions of letting go of him. "Yeah they already hurt a bit." I held my hands together smiling sheepishly.

He nodded with a slight smile, "I knew they did, I can tell when your in pain, you concentrate extremely hard, trying to hide from me in your facial expressions."

I blushed lightly and nodded laughing a bit, I didn't even know I did that until he told me. I moved away from him still smiling but I still stayed close to him. I remembered there were two things that he was interested in, not just that. I grimaced as I asked him, dreading his answer. "You said there were two things, that was one… what was the other?"

He chuckled then looked at me smiling, "So my kiss was amazing was it?"

I looked at him horrified, "You weren't suppose to hear that!" I whined putting my hands on my head looking down. "You were with my dad you were listening to him who told you?"

Jasper shook his head, "Joanna dear I told you nothing was a secrete with us." he spoke with an amused tone. "No one told me what you said or even mentioned what was said. We all know what you said due to our hearing."

I pouted and huffed pulling my knees up to my chest, "You heard everything I've said when we are anywhere near each other, everything!" I said throwing my arms up drastically.

"Does that bother you?" He asked, I could tell he was concerned that it did.

With a heavy sigh I answered, "No, I just don't like it." Once again I pouted showing off my most hated physical feature.

"You are such a kid Joanna." He said laughing as he watched my childish actions.

I puffed out my cheeks then glared at him, "Then you are a pedophile." I said shortly. I don't know why but when he called me a kid it made me a bit angry, but I knew it was playful.

"You do know if I'm a pedophile we cant be together." he was now smirking. It highly irritated me that he was able to turn something from him being unhappy to me being unhappy.

"Yeah because you would be in jail!" I was trying to turn it back but I didn't have much faith that it would work.

"Really now? " He asked putting his hand on his chin, "Now who on earth is going to believe you when you walk up to them and tell them that I'm a pedophile because I'm 166 years old?" he smiled because he won and I glared because he won.

"Well… no one." I crossed my arms over my chest and didn't look at him. I was a sore looser there was no doubt about that, what made it worse was that I started this one and I had never won against him. "Wait you were 20 when you died!" I said smiling hoping he wouldn't take this fact away from me.

"My birth certificate says I'm 18 until January." He patted my head and laughed to himself.

I groaned and looked at him, "Can't you just let me win something!" I pouted trying to look cute, though I'm sure I failed.

"You won my heart, isn't that enough?" He pouted mirroring my expression.

"No!" I hit my legs harder than I meant to, "I want to win an argument, but you have to be so stupid and smart and know everything and I can't win!"

Jasper was looking at me with a mock sad expression, I put my head on my knees and made whining sounds. "Well I guess someday I can lt you win something… maybe not something big , but something."

"Do I get to pick what I win?" I asked looking at him from the corner of my eye and saw him shake his head. I let out one more loud groan then sighed, "Fine."

"You need to be quieter." Jasper said, I bit my lip laughing slightly. "Its not a big deal you just don't want to have to tell your parents you were talking to yourself do you?"

I shrugged, "I'll just tell them I was on the phone with you." it was no big deal I didn't get why he was telling me to be quiet.

"Really now? Its about midnight and you are making strange noises on the phone with me." He looked at me as if he was thinking, "Well I wouldn't be particularly happy with you if you told your dad that because he clearly told me no calls after 11:00. Plus I don't want to know what he would think with your sounds, he is already worried that we've done a few things."

I looked at him horrified, "Why would he think that what did you tell him?"

My dad wouldn't just automatically assume that, would he? "I said absolutely nothing to give him that idea, I swear darlin'."

I grabbed my hair and groaned quietly, "No wonder he says he doesn't like you, he thinks you've already slept with me! Never mind the fact that its impossible to do, I mean really, he thinks I did something I can't do!"

"Its not technically impossible its just not a very good idea." he was thinking now but I wasn't sure about what, or even if I wanted to know about what.

Actually I think I think I knew what he was thinking but I don't think I wanted him to think that. "Don't say that he might hear you!" I said waving my hands around.

"How is he going to hear me?" Jasper asked smiling.

I looked at him, he looked so handsome when he smiled, well he looked good anytime but when he was smiling it was amazing. I shook my head again, "_Wow that was random." I thought staring at him. _

"Joanna how is he going to hear me?" He asked again this time not smiling.

"I don't know I just know he will know, he's like that!" He laughed and I looked at him confused. "What's funny?"

"Your dad isn't going to hear me or know I said anything, that's just silly talk." I looked away from him as he spoke. He always had some stupid comment, but a part of me liked it. Weird I know.

"What if he does find out Jasper?" if my dad already thought I did that then I didn't want to know what he would think if he found out we even mentioned it.

"One we didn't really talk about it." I nodded in agreement, "Second the only way he will know is if you tell him, which I know your not going to do."

My eyes were wide as I shook my head, "NO way in hell am I even mentioning it or hinting around to it!"

Jasper laughed and nodded, "Will you please sleep now?" I was tired and he could tell I was.

"Are you going to leave?" I asked quietly. I wanted him to stay with me but I wasn't sure he could handle it.

"Can I sit in the chair?" He asked looking at me biting his lip.

"I don't mind I just don't want you to leave me." I looked at him curiously, I still wasn't sure what he was going to do.

He stood up, he looked so tall from where I was, no that he wasn't he just looked it now. With a sigh he moved the chair next to my bed and sat down, he put his legs over the edge of my bed watching me. I laid down and he smiled watching me, I felt a little strange with him staring at me like he was but that feeling was washed away as soon as it came.

"Goodnight, I love you kid." Jasper said running his cold hand down my cheek as he chuckled lightly.

"I love you too" I smirked pulling the covers over my mouth opening my eyes slightly, "Pedophile."

**See I told you it was fluffy! Lol and funny I hope... lol ok people I am on a goal... I want 100 reviwes and i am so close!! SO very very close! Please if you read it review, i don't care if its one word or a million just review please!! **


	18. Unfair and Safe

**Okay major time skip here! lol thanks for all the reviews I really liked them so thanks again! ok well this is a really long chapter, Im not sure if everyone likes that but i love them so here you go!**

Moths passed with nothing extra exciting happening, my mom and dad took Dominic out to Montgomery for one weekend, it was pretty fun but Jasper couldn't come with us. So the whole trip I was texting or on the phone with him, he tried to tell me to just go have fun with my family but if I didn't text him he would text me. I had no idea how much I truly missed my dad until I had him back. Every day I woke up and he was here I automatically thought back to when he wasn't. Any time I feared him not being here I ran to him. He always had calming words for me, he would hug me and tell me that everything was ok, that we were ok. There had been times when I woke up in the night and even thought Jasper was usually there, that I just needed my dad. Never once did he act like it bothered him and honestly I don't think it ever did. No time had proven to me that I was a daddy's girl that now.

The only problem with my dad was his opposition to Jasper and I being together, he hardly said anything to him but you could tell. There was always a certain look in his eyes. I could tell simply by the way he spoke to Jasper, I knew Jasper could feel the dislike my father felt for him but he always said it was no big deal. When it was just my mom if she knew he was here she would just have us keep the door open. Now with my dad he would have us leave the door open and at random moment he would come up and check on us. That doesn't both me at all I could see him doing that but here is where I started getting annoyed. He would call me on my phone and if I didn't answer fast enough he would ask why I couldn't, then if I answered at the right time for him he would ask if jasper was there with me. Then he would call me down stairs or where ever he was to see if I took to long or if anything was wrong with the way I looked. I loved my dad to death but his problems with Jasper were a bit over the top… or way over the top.

Something I found highly refreshing was my mothers new attitude. She had become more happy and more simple, her favorite thing was to have Esme come over and work on something or cook something. Esme introduced my mom to gardening and it was off like that, now we had at least half an acre of nothing but garden. Not that I minded at all, it was extremely beautiful with a gazebo in the middle that was built by Emmett, my dad and Jasper. Lately my mom had become more of an open book when it came to Jasper and I, weather that was to make up for my dads behavior towards him or if she just really liked him I would never know, but I was thankful for it. My mom put out extra effort when Jasper was here to make him feel welcome and I knew he appreciated it.

Both my parents had made sure that Dominic and I were always treated equal, until now. It was the most obvious thing that they liked Alice more than they did Jasper. With my dad there was no doubt that Alice was main priority in his treating hospitable mindset. With my mom you had to know her to see the difference, she was making herself be nice to Jasper, now there was no doubt in my mind that she liked him but when it was Alice it was so natural. I admitted to myself and Dominic that it hurt when they did that but I would never admit to them.

I knew Dominic sometimes felt that it was his fault that they treated Alice and Jasper different but I was always telling him not to worry about it. I never blamed my brother for anything, no matter how much he thought I should. It was strange to think about but for some reason Dominic and I had become even closer in the last few months than we had ever been. We often just talked to each other about things that meant a lot to us, random things that we felt just anything that came to mind while we were with each other. I had learned that he and Alice had there first kiss, they were really close to each other. Its like they were on the same wavelength as the other. Alice had become used to his sent with no problem so she could spend all day with him touching him as well.

Alice was now like a part of my McCarty family due to my parent acceptance, Dominic and the fact that she said that we were already sisters. There was no way you could not like Alice it was as simple as that. She was so nice and happy, it was like no one did wrong with Alice. If you were having a bad day Alice was always there to make you happy. She gave me a lot of insight on Jasper, like things he didn't like and things that made him happy. Truly I owed a lot to her but she said the best gift I could do was make her best friend happy.

The person who made me happiest besides of course Jasper was Rosalie. I was the first person she was truly friends with including the Cullen's. The reason she was friends with the other Cullen's was that they were her "family". Rosalie took on a bit of a motherly role to me and it really didn't bother me. Since Emmett was my great uncle and she was his wife she was my great aunt. She had always wanted kids and I guess I was the closest she ever got. When I say she was motherly I don't mean like she babied me or anything she just made sure I was happy and that Jasper was always treating me right, if she saw that I was upset she took it upon herself to make things right. She would jump down anyone's throat if they made me upset in any way, that included Emmett and Jasper. It was an interesting sight to see perfect beauty Rosalie yelling at the big and buff Emmett and Jasper.

There was a time where I didn't like to be around her to much or I started criticizing myself but I had gotten over that. Now I could be around her all I wanted and I never thought of how I looked next to her. Most of the time Rosalie and I worked on cars or looked at new models saying what we liked or didn't like about them. We had built a new engine for my truck and made it sound like a total beast next to other trucks. Bella didn't get why we wanted the truck to sound louder but it was just our thing. She also was like any other best friend would, we talked about clothes boys and she would always bring up sex. I was still totally against talk about it and every time she would say anything about it I would blush and try not to listen. She would always laugh and say she was trying to corrupt me, but I just rolled my eyes. The reason I didn't talk about sex was I was afraid of it, I wasn't sure why and never had a reason to be I was just afraid.

Another person who would always talk about or mention just to make me blush was good old annoying uncle Emmett. He never actually wanted to talk about it, he would just make comments about things all the time. Like if Jasper was looking at me, since he had to look down to see my face Emmett would say that he was looking at my chest. It was not only annoying but embarrassing, because there were actually sometimes where Emmett would say that and Jasper really would be looking at my chest. Emmett was always goofing off and being stupid in some way, I had recently been introduced into the world of betting with Jasper and Emmett. When Bella was a human they had all kinds of bets on her but now that Dominic and I were the humans of the group there were bets on us. Dominic's was how soon he would be wearing all designer labels and being dressed in a style that was clearly Alice's. Mine was given to me by Edward and is extremely mean of them to do. They wanted to see who could get me to actually talk about sex, Jasper thought he would win, Emmett of course thought it would be him. If I had any say, which I don't I would vote for neither but I knew if one did it would be Jasper, not Emmett.

Edward had started to warm up to me I since the day in my room. I don't really think he ever had a problem with me I just thought he didn't have any faith in Jasper and I being together. If Jasper was in a bad mood or if he left without a clear reason as to why he left then I would just ask Edward what was wrong with him. The only problem with asking Edward well anything was he sugar-coated everything, Jasper never did that but I guess Edward was afraid of scaring me or something. I felt a strange closeness to Edward, he wasn't extremely talkative or anything like that he just had a certain quality about him that I could never really explain.

Bella and I had also gotten a lot closer as well. If Jasper was doing something I found strange or if I was wondering if I was doing something wrong then I could ask her about how it was with Edward when she was a human. I could find out pretty much the same from Edward but there were times when it was just better to talk to a girl about things. We found that we were extremely different on how we thought and our wants. She never wanted Edward to get her anything and she absolutely hated him buying her things. She also wanted him to be a lot closer to her and she was devastated when he left. The thing that I wished I had the power to do like Bella was block out Jasper's power. Often she found it useful and I bet it wouldn't hurt to have around Jasper as well.

Some times I wondered if I was good enough for Jasper, I had dreams of Maria, Nette and Lucy and they were almost as beautiful as Rosalie yet they weren't good enough for him, but he said I was. I asked him why he picked me when he could have anyone he wanted he told me because I was nicer and more beautiful than anyone in the world. It meant so much to me but I couldn't bring myself to believe him. He was so mice to me and always told me he loved me but there had been times when he had to leave and even once when he almost broke my forearm, but he didn't . He hated himself for it afterwards but I never blamed him for it. It was his past that made him the way he was, but he was around me so there was nothing more he could do. I loved Jasper and I didn't care what he did nothing in the world would ever change that.

Something I was extremely happy about with Jasper was school. Unlike before where we tried to keep our relationship a secrete we were open about it now. I had to go with Dominic before school due to my fathers wishes but he was always waiting for me outside. During school he walked me to every class and was waiting for me after. My teachers all knew he would be there and found it strangely amusing especially Mr. Woods. On the way to class he would hold my hand and kiss me on the cheek or something like that. It meant a lot to me and I knew he liked it as well. I could always tell how be was feeling or almost always tell, he liked having people know I was his. It started after the incident with Lucas, after that he would hold me or put his hand on me especially when he caught a guy looking at me. He was jealous but I liked it actually.

When we were alone we had become even closer, he kissed me more, he held me more and touched me more, Jasper had become more confident in being close to me but he still had his moments of weakness. I loved it when he was close to me, not only did I love him holding me I liked to hug him. I don't think he minded I think he liked it a lot more than he would ever let me know. He was always with me at night, weather he had to sneak in to be with me at my house, or I asked to stay the night with Rosalie and the other girls and I would sleep in his room. Sometimes he would sit in a chair next to the bed or as I liked he would lay in bed with me. He made me feel so special all the time no matter what, he was always doing small things to make me feel better and they always worked.

Jasper had told me so many stories about his life in the army, he knew a lot of my favorite war hero's and he would tell me first hand account s of what it was like being around them. With all the different backgrounds the Cullen's had a constant look into history though none was as interesting as my Jasper's. I saw the changes the Cullen's went through more and more, even in different forms than the first time I saw them changed. They had so many different forms, I liked seeing Jasper in a few of his changed forms and really I liked a lot of the other Cullen's as well. Not only did I see the Cullen's more I saw more of the other spirits. They scared me more than seeing all of the Cullen's other than Jasper. When I would sleep sometimes they would wake me screaming or saying things to me. Other times they would just look at me heart broken or scared, but it was no matter how they looked, it was terrifying. One thing I had noticed, they would always be more of them when something bad was about to happen, almost like warning me to get away.

Speaking of spirits I was looking at one as I sat in Mrs. Loya's calculus class. The spirit was a past life of one of my classmates Adonica, she was an Egyptian woman, by the clothes she was wearing she was a noble woman. This class was easy but I hated the people in here. They never talked to me just made fun of me when they thought I wasn't listening. Mrs. Loya loved me, I never had homework because I was able to do it in class, I did all my notes, got every or mostly every question right. The bell was going to ring in two minutes so everyone but me was standing at the door. I was still sitting down drawing a picture of the Egyptian noblewoman I had seen from Adonica. It was really good or I thought it was but there was something about the dress she wore that I couldn't get right. When the bell rang I put my things away and waiting for everyone to leave then walked out.

"Hey Kitten." I smiled as I heard the most beautiful voice in the world. Jasper leaned down and kissed my cheek.

"Hey." I leaned against his locker which was right by Mrs. Loya's door. He grabbed my hands and held them as people walked pasr us whispering. "Walking me to Mr. Wood's?" I asked pulling one hand away as he held tightly to the other.

He laughed slightly and nodded, "Don't I always?" He asked as he led me down the hall.

Mr. Woods was standing by the door and smirked as he saw me, I looked at Jasper then back at Mr. Woods. He was pointing to the wall looking at Jasper, I leaned around and that there was a big piece of paper on the wall. It was a sign, it said "Unless this is 3rd period Jasper Hale is not allowed to cross this point, sorry lover boy!" I laughed as Jasper looked at Mr. Woods, "I don't like you, I don't want you close to me more than im required to let you!"

I knew he was joking and Jasper did to, he smiled and kissed my hand waving to Mr. Woods and hurried on his way to Spanish 2. I looked at Mr. Woods as he was trying to hold in a laugh as I glared at him. "Oh go in Joanna." he patted my back and walked in and sat next to Alice and Dominic.

"I loved the sign, I think we need one for the house!" I punched Dominic in the arm and he laughed as Alice rolled her eyes. "What it's true!" He laughed and sat back in his chair,

"It's funny, but we don't need one for the house so stop thinking about doing it!" I pulled the picture out and started shading it.

I heard Dominic sigh then Alice giggle as she looked at my picture, "Its good, I love the way you did the eyes."

I nodded and smiled, I loved drawing eyes, they were my favorite thing to draw, "Yeah me to!" I said smiling as Mr. Woods came up to my desk and I put my things away. He smiled and slammed the book on my desk to signal class was starting.

Today's lesson was about the war of 1812, it was interesting but not my favorite. For once Dominic seemed to be focused, he loved learning about the war of 1812 and I could never figure out why. Everyone else was doing other random things not listening. I had heard this so many times but I still sat listening to his every word, and writing down any high points in his speech. Often my mind would wonder to Jasper or some other random thing that had no connection to history but in all honestly I didn't need to listen to it. I finished my drawing of the Egyptian woman and decided that I was going to hang this one up in my room, I wasn't sure why I liked it so much I just did.

Mr. Woods ended the class five minutes before the bell rang so we had time to talk or do whatever we wanted. "Did you finish it?" Alice asked looking at me from the other side of Dominic.

I showed her the picture and she nodded, "For now, I'm not sure if I want to color it but I don't think I will." I looked at it, it looked fine the way it was but I hadn't figured out if coloring it would enhance it or make it worse.

"I like it that way, no need to color it." Dominic was playing with his bangs as he spoke.

"I agree with Dominic keep it like it is." Alice Dominic and I all looked at the person who spoke . Marcus was standing in front of our desks looking at my drawing.

"Thanks I guess." I said coldly, I had never forgiven him for his part in Lucas beating me. I guess he thought I accepted his apology, which I surly did not.

"Look Joanna I'm really sorry about what has happened, and not just this year." he looked down then sighed looking back at me.

I looked at him curiously for a second, why was he doing this? I had a feeling that it was some stupid plan like it was the last time he talked to me. "Look Marcus just go away, I don't accept, it's a little to late." I closed my notebook and started putting my things away. I looked at Alice and Dominic, Alice was just looking at Marcus but Dominic was standing up with his body slightly in front of me.

"I didn't know what was going to happen last time, really I don't know if you believe me but I didn't!" He said putting his hands on my desk.

I scoffed and stood up, Marcus grabbed my bag as I went to pick it up, "Get out of here Marcus I'm not kidding." Dominic said pushing me back slightly.

The bell rang and Alice grabbed Dominic, "Drop it and lets go." I looked at her and Marcus let go of my bag.

The three of us walked out of the class and I went towards Coach Soto's Spanish class which Jasper was in while Alice and Dominic went to there lockers. "Joanna why wont you forgive me!" I walked faster as I heard Marcus. "Stop ok just listen to me!"

I stopped and looked at him, "Ok I forgive you for helping Lucas beat the hell out of me but I don't forgive you for making my life hell for the past three years!" I said through gritted teeth.

He grabbed my arm and pulled me to him, I looked up at him and glared. "When I said I was sorry I meant for everything not just what happened with Lucas ok?"

"I don't care what your sorry for I told you what I accepted your apology for ok? So leave me alone." I pulled away from him bumping into something hard, I knew instantly it was Jasper.

I looked up at him, he was giving Marcus a look of pure hatred, "What are you doing with Joanna?" he asked growling slightly pulling me to him holding me tightly.

"I was just apologizing, I didn't do anything." the tone in Marcus's voice shocked me for a moment. His voice was now completely different from when he was talking to me, I could tell that Marcus Hated Jasper but I didn't know why.

"Well she answered you, I heard her so I would now like it if you would just not talk to her anymore." Jasper had moved in front of me slightly but still had his arm around me. I looked around, people were walking by looking at the three of us but none of them stopped. I looked to the other side of Jasper and noticed why no one stopped, all of the Cullen's and Dominic were standing there watching.

"Well I'm not going to stop talking to her just because you say I have to, and what if she wants to talk to me?" He asked looking at me and I rolled my eyes. I most definitely not want to talk to him, I don't know why he would say that.

"She doesn't want to talk to, and yes you will stay away from her she is mine, and I forbid you from talking to her." Jasper's voice was flat and his tone was clearly telling Marcus to shut up and move along but he didn't get the clue.

"You talk about you like she actually is yours like you own her!" Marcus said loudly. I was surprised no teacher heard but I remembered that we were by the computer labs, no teachers were around here. "She is a big girl she can make decisions on her own Jasper." Marcus was looking at me now, he looked angry actually.

I heard Jasper growl and felt him shake slightly. I out my hands on his back and laid my head on his back as well. "She is mine, mind, body soul, mine." I could feel his anger as he glared at Marcus.

"Mr. Hale, Mr. Rays is there a problem here?" Mr. McComas asked as he walked up to us.

I looked at Jasper then to Marcus, "No sir." Jasper quickly replied.

Marcus took a breath then shook his head, "No sir."

"Then you all need to get out of here." Marcus was the first to walk off.

I watched him leave and Jasper started walking letting go of me. I looked at the ground and then I felt the others next to me, "He is mad and he doesn't think he could control himself around you right now." I nodded as Edward walked ahead of me with Bella who was looking back at me.

Dominic walked up and put his hand on my shoulder, I sighed walking out with him and Alice. I watched Jasper's feet as he walked ahead of us, Edward sped up and started talking to him, I desperately wanted to know why they were saying but I wasn't going to ask. When we got outside I just followed Dominic and Alice, I know I usually went with Jasper but I didn't think he wanted me with him right now.

"Where are you going?" I turned around and looked at Jasper as he spoke looking at me leaning against his hummer.

"I didn't think you wanted me to go with you this time." I said quietly knowing he heard me.

He shook his head, "I always want you to go with me, so come on." He got in the hummer and I smiled waving to Dominic and Alice. I looked at Jasper as I got in, his head was rested on the steering wheel and he wasn't breathing.

I looked at my hands, he wasn't breathing so he must have had trouble with me being in the car with him, "I'll just get a ride with Dominic, its ok Jasper." smiled at him softly then opened the door to get out.

Jasper grabbed my arm and I looked back at him, "You don't need to leave Joanna, its not you. Its him." I knew he meant Marcus, "The way he felt and looked at you." he let out a low growl and I moved my arm away from him, "And he touched you, no one is allowed to touch you your mine!"

"Jasper stop, calm down please." I looked at him biting my lip, I wanted to reach out to him but it wasn't safe to touch him.

With a sigh he looked at me with black eyes, "I know I advise you to be afraid but please not right now." I could tell he didn't like the words that he said as he bit his lip.

I placed my hand on his arm and held onto him tightly, I was still afraid but he wanted me to not be so I did my best to hide it, "I'm sorry, but still please calm down. I don't want to be afraid but when your angry I can't help it."

I didn't look at him but I could feel him looking at me, I heard him say something to quiet for my ears to hear. "I'm sorry Joanna." he smiled and leaned over kissing my forehead softly. He started the car and drove out of the parking lot faster than was allowed or necessary. "Why did he start talking to you in the first place"

I looked over at him, I wasn't really sure why so I didn't have anything to tell him, "He just came up and said he was sorry I didn't sat anything to him it was totally random."

Jasper nodded and shook his head, "It's a bit to late for him to apologize, why did he even try to do it now."

I could tell Jasper now hated Marcus, it seemed he hated any guy that touched me or talked to me. "I told him that, I didn't want to talk to him." I said that harshly but it wasn't directed at him.

"I never said you did Joanna don't get mad at me." his tone was slightly warning but I'm not sure if he meant for it to sound that way or not.

I looked at my feet, my shoes were lime green with the names of my brother and the Cullen's on them. At the moment they seemed extremely interesting, "I wasn't mad at you, just Marcus so don't get snappy with me." my voice was quiet and held no force, it sounded more shy than anything else.

I heard Jasper laugh harshly as he sped up, "Next time you are going to stand up to me make sure you don't sound like such a whining child."

I looked at him outraged, he had never called me a child when he wasn't playing. He actually meant to make me mad, "Whatever Jasper just take me home." I crossed my arms over my chest and looked out the window.

Jasper didn't try to talk to me the while ride there he just took me to my house in silence. I didn't mind I didn't want to talk to him in the first place so it was no big deal. He didn't want to talk to me ether so it was a perfect deal. Every now and then I would see him look at me but if he saw me look at him he would turn away as if he wasn't looking at me. When we pulled into my driveway he stopped the car and looked at me.

"What are you going to make me walk the rest of the way or something?" I asked rolling my eyes. I had no idea why we were arguing, we had never really argued before and I didn't like it as much as I thought I did.

Jasper shook his head and looked at me, "No I'm not going to make you walk don't be stupid.." I put my hand on the door, "Stop ok, I'm sorry I hate this, we have never fought before. The only reason I got mad at you was because of Marcus. You didn't do anything and I'm sorry."

I looked at him and let go of the handle, "I'm sorry to, I shouldn't have gotten so mad over a stupid comment."

"You have no business apologizing." He grabbed my hand and kissed it, "Your to perfect to have done anything wrong."

I held his hand as he drove up next to my truck and stopped, "Do you want to come in or do you need to hunt?" I grabbed my things as hopped out looking at him as he turned off the hummer.

"No I'm good I can go in with you." I smiled as he stepped out of the car and was by me in a second.

"Jasper what if my mom saw you do that!" I asked looking at my house. I didn't want my mom to see that I would even rather it be my dad than her.

"Don't be silly I would have known if your mom was by the window, she is in the bathroom doing her hair, I can hear the blow-dryer." He laughed and kissed me softly on the lips putting his hand on my waist pulling me close suddenly he pulled away.

I looked at him and he had his head down an walked away from me slightly. I frowned and turned around and saw why he was acting the way he did, my father was standing in the door way looked more pissed than I had ever seen him.

"What the hell do you think your doing?" He asked walking outside looking right at Jasper.

"Dad its not a…"

"Stay out of this Joanna, I'm talking to Jasper now." My father said raising a hand up to me.

I looked at the door and saw my mom running out with her hair half done followed my Dominic and Alice. "I'm sorry sir, I didn't know you were there." Jasper's eyes flashed to me, "But I don't feel like I did anything wrong." he said firmly.

I watched my father's eyes grow wide and the vein in his neck was showing, "Oh you did nothing wrong did you?" his tone was an angry sarcastic. I was wondering why Jasper just didn't use his powers but I guess he thought he could handle it.

"No sir, I don't think I did." He looked my father right in the eyes with a blank hard expression.

"What happened Henry?" My mom asked walking up to my father putting her hand on his arm. I was hoping that my mom would calm him down but I didn't know anything at this time.

"This boy was kissing Joanna and feeling her up." I looked at him shocked, Jasper was doing no such thing.

Jasper raised an eyebrow and shook his head when my mom looked at him, "You must have saw wrong sir I had my hands on her hips sir, no where else."

I could tell my mother believed Jasper but suddenly she became angry and I mentally groaned and prepared my self to get yelled at. "Henry McCarty, you are going to stand there and be angry at Jasper and Joanna when you just congratulated Dominic for kissing Alice I don't think so!"

"What!" I yelled stepping in front of Jasper looking at my dad. "How can you do that that's so messed up. Is it because he is a boy or because you like Alice so much more than Jasper?" I asked angrily. I could feel Jasper trying to calm me but I stepped on his foot and he took the hint to stop.

"You are over reacting Joanna and no its got nothing to do with Alice, so stop! I just don't want to see that boy with his hands on you and I have a right to say that! Now get off of my land and I don't want you back here." he looked away from me and my mom.

I could tell that my mother was even more furious than I was, "His name is Jasper!" I groaned "Its because I'm a girl!" I yelled as I looked at Alice and Dominic who were both angry as well. "If I was a boy and Jasper was a girl it would all be ok with you wouldn't it!" he put his hands up trying to get me to stop yelling. "You know what you don't have to worry about Jasper being here any more and you don't have to worry about me being here ether." My mother stoped looking at my dad and looked at me.

"Joanna McCarty you wouldn't dare, you are not allowed to be alone with him!" my dad said standing up straight. I could tell I had pushed him but he deserved it, I thought he would be happy for me but no he was mad.

"Oh no I'm not but Dominic can be alone with Alice because he is a boy! You let him do so many things and you see Jasper kiss me and you freak out!" I felt my moms hand on my shoulder as I dropped my bad and walked into the forest.

I ran until I was out of breath, I stopped and looked back. I was sure I was far away from my house, and I didn't want it any other way. I leaned against a tree and sat down on the hard ground. I closed my eyes and put my head on my knees, I let out a heavy sigh and bit my lip. I couldn't believe my dad acted that way, and Dominic had just kissed Alice. Never had I imagined my dad would act that way to me, before I wanted nothing more than my dad being with me all the time and now I wished he would just go away for a bit. I felt the tears pour from my eyes and soon I was shaking as the sobs tore through my body.

"You look beautiful when you cry darling but please stop." I looked up at Jasper and laughed scoffing a bit wiping the tears off my face as they still fell. He sat down next to me and grabbed my hand. "Talk to me Joanna, just let it out."

I laid my head on his shoulder and I felt him looking at me as he squeezed my hand lightly, "He was never like this, he always let me do whatever I wanted. If my mom was mad at me he would smooth it over. Now he's different I can't believe he is acting like that, all because he doesn't like you. Its not like he even knows you to not like you, he says its because I'm his little girl. I could see it if he treated Dominic and I the same but he doesn't! Now Dominic is like his favorite and god forbid he gets in trouble its only me!" I felt the tears falling heavily from my eyes, the collar of my shirt was soaked. "I hate this, its like no matter what I do its not good enough for him. I want to make him happy but I'm not doing anything wrong so I don't know how to fix it."

"You can't fix something that's not broken." I looked at him and he slowly reached out wiping the tears off my face. "You're doing nothing wrong Joanna, you can't be fixed. Your dad just needs to realize that were not doing anything."

"What about Dominic?" I asked looking at him. I knew he would have an answer for it, he was a know it all. However how could I blame him, he had been alive 166 years so he probably did know quite a bit.

"Just like you said, its because you're a girl." I looked at him with my mouth a gape, "Don't look at me like that Joanna just let me explain. Your dad is from a family that has been in the military for generations. He still has the ideas of his family, since you're a girl your boyfriend will automatically be the bad guy. Dominic who is the male, your dad is going to be proud of him because its like a right of passage."

I looked at him, he was looking back at me, his eyes were pith black but he didn't try to move away. I could see his neck strained as he looked at me, there was no movement form is chest and I knew he wasn't breathing. "Thank you Jasper." I pulled my hand away from him and put my hand on his cold cheek, "I can tell its hard right now, I'm not going to be upset if you leave."

He stood up and moved a few feet away form me, "I'm not going to leave I just can't be that close to you right now." I stood up and wiped the tears off my face looking at him. He looked so tall and so majestic, it was like I was looking at a different person. His blonde hair seemed to shine as he looked at the sky, I knew he was in pain but he looked peaceful.

I looked up at the sky, it was cloudy but there were blue patches and the sun would shine through every now and then. "Wow it might actually be sunny today." I said quietly. I sighed and looked at Jasper, he was thinking something I could tell, he looked at me then smiled, "What?" I asked.

"I just realized that I never showed you something." he was looking at me with a strange expression. It seemed like he was excited but he was also dreading something. "Come with me." He said grabbing my hand and pulled me along. We walked until we had reached a semi clear spot. "Stay here." I nodded and watched Jasper as he walked out into the clearing. I was expecting something but nothing happened.

"What is suppose to be happening?" I asked looking at him extremely confused.

"Just wait for a moment." He took off his shirt and confused me even more. He was just standing in the middle of a clearing with his shirt off looking at the sun. I sighed and looked at the sky and looked at the blue sky, I smiled as the sun hit my face then I heard Jasper clear his throat. I looked at him and he seemed to be shinning. In fact… he was.

I stepped into the clearing with him and looked at him, he was glittering like a diamond or thousands of diamonds. He looked absolutely beautiful, I always thought vampires died or at least burnt in the sun but this was so much better. "You look beautiful Jasper." I said quietly.

Jasper laughed harshly and shook his head, "This, this is monstrous." He motioned to himself, "No, you are the true beauty."

I felt my face heat up as he stepped out of the sun, he walked closer to me and wrapped his strong arms around me. I could feel the chill of his body through my clothes and it was welcoming. When I felt the chill of his body I felt at home, like nothing was wrong. Here in Jasper arms I felt completely safe.

**Ok so what did you think?? please tell me anyone who reads it please please review! I want 100 reviews and I'm so so close! Come on people just five updates!**


	19. Belong

**This was all written in one day and it has to be one of my favorite chapters, it isn't long but I think the content makes it all worth it. Ok now to get to some thanking here! I have 101 reviews and I am so so so Happy!!!! Like oh wow happy so here is a list of everyone who has reviewed my last chapter! **

**VioletEmbry4ever, , Luckyiris, Superdani a., Scorpio21.and supercalifragilisticexplalidoc**

Jasper carried me back to his house, he tried to convince me to go back to my own home but I wasn't going to have that. I was in absolutely no mood to see my dad right now and I know he was going to be there. When we got there Esme greeted us smiling and asked if I was hungry or anything, I politely declined and went up stares ahead o Jasper. I was sure he was explaining what had happened at my house to his, "mother." I sighed and laid down on his bed looking at the books trying to read the titles.

"Joanna." My eyes flashed to Jasper's beautiful figure as stood in the door way. He silently crossed the room and grabbed my chin and made me look at him. "I need to hunt, I will be back to you in two hours."

I nodded as he lightly pressed his lips to mine, "I love you." I said smiling as he grabbed my hand then left out the window.

I looked out the window where he had last been. I wanted him back, I felt like I needed him more than I ever had before. I never had thought my dad would do that to me, and all because of Jasper. Never before did my dad play favorites, not even when we were little it was always fare. I know I was daddy's little girl but he still gave Dominic the same freedoms he had given me. Even if Dominic thought that my dad did more for me but he didn't.

"Hello Joanna." I looked up, Esme was standing in the doorway with a backpack. "Jasper told me what happened and I guess that's why your mother brought over these clothes." She spoke so sweetly and I couldn't imagine anyone not getting in a good mood.

"Did she say anything else?" I asked sitting up as she gracefully walked into Jasper room placing my backpack on the bottom of the bed.

"She wanted me to let you know that your dad is just over reacting and not to worry about it." She smiled and patted my hand. "And you have to go home right after school tomorrow."

I smiled at her and nodded, "Yeah I will." I looked in the bag, my mother had sent me a pair of pajamas. They were long sleeve and long pants, I laughed inside, I knew that my mom sent me these because I was going to be in the same house as Jasper. The clothes I had for tomorrow were pretty good. They were a pair of black skinny jeans and a line green tank top. I didn't need accessories I was sure I could borrow something from Alice, Bella or Rosalie that I liked.

"You know your dad isn't really mad at you right?" I looked at her and couldn't help but laugh. I regretted because it seemed really rude but I didn't believe her, "Father's are just protective, you should know that."

"All I know is that I'm not allowed to be with Jasper according to my father." I started picking at the ripped part of my jeans as I pulled my knees up to my chest. "That's a step over protective if you ask me."

"Well it may be he is a bit over protective but don't worry about it he isn't mad at you. He may be mad at Jasper but that's to be expected. Any father would react angrily to that sight maybe not taken it as far as your did but still." Esme patted my cheek and smiled, "I know your mad and hurt but don't be to angry with him."

I sighed and nodded, "But why did he get so mad, that what I want to know."

Her musical laughter filled the air, "I would love to tell you the reason but I don't know why he did it. I don't even think your father would fully understand why he did it!"

I looked at her, the sun was hitting her arm and the side of her face and she looked beautiful, Even the part of her body the sun wasn't hitting seemed to shine. Before I thought Rosalie was the most beautiful but now that I am really looking I would have to say Esme is right next to her. I sighed and looked at my legs, I wasn't like them not beautiful or extremely smart nothing about me was special. I was plain, boring, I did strange things with my hair yet they all accepted me as one of them, and even wanted to make me feel better.

I wasn't sure what made me compare myself to the Cullen's but I couldn't help it. I guessed it was just that even Esme was trying to make me feel better and I did nothing or was nothing special to look at yet these perfect people were trying to help me. "Thanks Esme." I said as I laid back down looking out the window. Esme patted my shoulder then left Jasper's room.

I put my hands under my head and looked around his room, I smiled as I noticed something on one of his shelves that I had never seen before. I stood up and walked over to it, it was a picture of me and him with another picture or painting of me next to it. of me next to it. I recognized the picture of Jasper and I. It was one of the days at school, it was lunch time and we were standing under one of the trees and he his arms around my waist and mine were around his shoulders. We were both smiling and he looked so handsome and yet I was… not good looking.

The painting was of me but I looked more beautiful than I could ever look in real life, He had painted me with my hair teased up big and my make up done in bright colors and in strange patterns. My clothes were like perfect scene clothes but I didn't have those clothes no matter how much I wish I did. I was smiling and my eyes were practically shinning. Every thing was done with so much details, it was as if he just looked at me and memorized every detail of me.

"He spent over two weeks trying to get that picture just right." I looked back and saw Edward standing in the middle of the room. "That's all he did when he wasn't with you, and believe it or not he still isn't happy with it." he chuckled lightly, "He says it doesn't show your true beauty."

I let out a harsh laugh, "What beauty?" I asked looking at him curiously. "I'm not beautiful this picture is what Jasper wishes I looked like. Not what I do look like."

Edward picked up the picture and held it up next to me, "It looks like you to me." He said shrugging, "But that's your thoughts, you don't know how Jasper sees you."

I looked at him curiously, "But you do." I said as he nodded, "You read minds so you know why everyone does things. What thoughts make them do things."

"You may be taking my powers a little to far, I don't know why every one does things." a small smile appeared on his face. "Like now you are thinking how Jasper could love someone as ugly as you think you are. I don't know exactly why he loves you or why he pushes himself to be with you. I just know that he loves you and needs to be with you for him to be happy." Edward looked at me and was laughing a bit loudly.

I looked at him for a moment then realized he was laughing at my thoughts, I had been thinking that maybe he needs me because he is like a girl and since I smell like chocolate to him I make him happy. "Shut up." I said glaring at him.

"Sorry, I couldn't help it." he shook his head, "But no that's not why, he needs you because you are his true love, and now if you will excuse me I need to get back to my true love."

"Thanks Edward." I said as he smiled and nodded walking out of the room. I sat down at his desk and looked at the picture. I maybe I was making myself more ugly than I was. However I just couldn't see it in myself.

"Its not finished." I jumped at the voice and stood up. Jasper smiled at me sheepishly, "I'm sorry I startled you, I couldn't stay away from you for the whole two hours." He looked at his watch, "Well I guess ten minutes didn't make much of a difference."

I smiled and walked over to him and wrapped my arms around his cool waist smiling. He laughed slightly and hugged me back, "I'm glad your back." Ok yeah I sounded like he had been gone for a long time and yeah he wasn't but I don't care.

"Um are you ok?" He asked looking down at me with a concerned expression, "Your emotions are confusing me."

I pulled away from Jasper and he kept his eyes on me, "Jasper." I paused and looked at him, "Why are you with me?" my voice was quiet now.

Jasper smiled and looked at me, "Because I love you." he didn't understand what I was talking about.

"No, I mean like I'm ugly a…" I wasn't able to finish what I was saying because Jasper was by me in an instant.

He had my face in his hands and was looking at me with such intensity that I was taken back, "You are not ugly, don't you dare say that again." I wasn't looking at him and it seemed he didn't like that. "Joanna look at me." I did as he told. "I don't know why you think this but… its just stupid."

I sighed, I knew I was going to upset him. "I mean look at you and look at you family! You are all so perfect then there is me, a plain normal human."

"You Joanna are far from a normal human and I don't see my family as beautiful. They are my family nothing more." he smiled and grabbed my hand kissing it.

The next words came out of my mouth before I even thought about the consequences, "Maria is almost more beautiful than Rosalie, why love me when I'm sure you could have her back."

Jasper's expression changed and I could feel the anger radiating off of him, "Don't you ever compare yourself to her or say anything about me loving her!" I flinched as he yelled at me. "I never loved her, I thought I did but I didn't. The only thing she gave me besides a life of hell was a bed time companion!" I was now shaking now but I didn't move I couldn't move, I couldn't remember how long it had been since he yelled at me like this. He stopped and looked at me then closed his eyes and let out a calming wave. "Joanna, before you I didn't know love, you are the one that gave me that emotion. I spent so long just taking in the emotions of my family and watching them wondering how they could feel like that towards one person." he looked at me and smiled. "Now that I have you I understand how. You are the reason for me to love, the reason for me to go through this dreadful life. I now realize that I'm glad I was brought into this, because if I hadn't I wouldn't have you."

I was speechless, he was now giving me all of his emotions so I was feeling his love. I was feeling his love that was mine or mine alone. It was then I realized that it didn't matter how I looked, not matter what anyone else thought about me I would always be special in Jasper's eyes. There was nothing that would be able to take this feeling away from me. This whole time I had thought that I was Jasper's but he was mine to, and h was trying to make me see that.

"I'm sorry Jasper." I said holding onto him.

"Don't do that." He said looking down at me.

"Do what?"

"You know what I mean."

"Apologize?" I bit my lip, "What's wrong with that?"

"It gets annoying, and I have told you not to do that." I laughed at him slightly, "What's so funny?"

I laughed and kissed the bottom of his jaw, "You like it that I'm annoying sometimes." I smirked and looked up at him.

"Where did you hear that?" he asked grabbing my hand.

"Well Mr. Whitlock, you never said it out loud but you know as well as I do that if one day I just wasn't annoying you would miss it!" Jasper nodded and kissed me lightly. "Wouldn't you?"

"You are right about that, but it doesn't matter what part of your personality was missing I would miss any of them." He put his head on mine and held me tightly to him.

"Hey Jasper guess what!" Emmett yelled running into his room. He paused as he saw the two of us, "Aw look at my little niece!" he said laughing.

"Emmett if you just wanted to bug me, go away!" Jasper said clearly annoyed that our time was interrupted. I put my hand on his chest and laughed lightly.

"No I want to ask if you want to wrestle!" I looked at him curiously, "I think I found out how to beat you!"

Jasper laughed and I couldn't help but smile at the sound, "Sorry, I'm busy." he smirked, "And I wouldn't want to humiliate you in front of your family."

"Well, well, well tough guy." I said poking him in the chest. " I need you to prove that you can humiliate him, you know you insulted my family after all." I knew Jasper wanted to but he wouldn't do it because he thought I would mind. Really I wanted to see them fight, I had never seen it before and I was really curious.

Jasper growled then kissed my forehead as he ran down stares, "I love you kid!" Emmett said picking me up and hugging me.

I laughed and followed them outside, Emmett and Jasper were standing in the back yard looking at each other. Rosalie was talking top Emmett and he had his arm around her waist. Carlisle and Esme were sitting on the porch looking at them smiling while Edward and Bella were standing against the wall both smiling. I walked over to Jasper and hugged him, "Good luck solider." I said looking up at him.

He smiled and nodded, "Thank you ma'am." he said in a think southern accent. "But I don't need it for this Yankee boy." I laughed loudly as he made not only my day but my life.

"Get 'em reb." Jasper kissed me a bit hard then I walked away from them as Rosalie did the same.

We walked over to Alice and Dominic who had just joined us in the back. Dominic walked over to me and put me in an awkward head lock then smiled at me as I got out of it. I smiled and looked at him as Alice walked back over to him. Soon my attention was focused on the most amazing thing I had ever seen with both me and Rosalie cheering on our vampires. As I looked around for a second I realized, this is the place I had been looking for my whole life, the place I belonged .

**So what do you think? please review this chapter. I think its awesome but it might also ben to rushed through so tell me what you think please! Oh and here is some news... I alrady have the plot for a sequil to tis story so there will definetly be more Jasper and Joanna when this ends! **


	20. Gone

**This chapter is short but I think its a great chapter. Emmett might seen a little out of Character but its how I think he would react in the situation. I actually cried writing it! I thank you all for reviewing and I'm sorry for the delay! **

The fight had to be the most amazing thing I had ever seen. I couldn't see them hardly at all but what I could see was simply amazing. Emmett would run at Jasper and he would appear behind him. No matter how strong Emmett was it appeared Jasper that Jasper was one step ahead of him. He would do trick like things that I knew weren't something he would usually do. It was easy to tell he was showing off, every time he would do one of those tricks he would look at me. In the end of course Jasper won with Emmett yelling that he was a show off.

I slept there that night, my mother knew I was there and I wasn't going to go home. I was still mad about my fathers over-reacting. Jasper asked me to go home but I refused and even when he begged I still said no. He wasn't used to not getting whatever he wanted from me so he pouted for a little bit then gave up on still trying to make me change my mind. I slept with him that night of course, I loved being close to him or even just knowing he was there.

That morning my mother had Alice and Dominic bring over clothes for school. When they came they also told me that my mother wanted me to please come home right after school. This was the final day of school before the Thanksgiving break and I guessed my mom wanted me home. I wasn't going to go home right after school, I was going to come here then most likely later tonight I would go home.

School that day passed uneventfully, most of my classes were watching a movie or some assignment to pass the time. The most surprising thing about that day was that no one made fun of me. They were all to busy worrying about what they were doing over the holiday. During lunch Rosalie got mad at Emmett and I when we started throwing things at each other.

Mr, Woods class was horrible to, we had a substitute named Mr. Goss, he had to be the worst. He had been a substitute since I was in 1st grade and since that day people had been giving him hell. His voice was high and nasally and he looked like a rat with a beard. He made us all move our desks away from each other all facing the walls, he even gave one boy detention for talking. Our work was strictly out of the book, reading 25 pages out of our history books about the Chinese immigration to America,

Putting it mildly, today wasn't the best. After school I walked out side to Jasper's hummer and waited for him. He had to go to the office for something was what Alice told me as she came outside. I finally saw him with a piece of paper in his hand walking out of the building.

"Hey Joanna." Jasper said smiling as he walked up to me and kissed the top of my head. I smiled and hugged him around the waist the best I could

I grabbed the paper from his hand and it was his report card, of course all 100's. "Why didn't they send it in the mail?" I asked looking up at him.

He shrugged and walked over to the drivers side. "I don't know, I wasn't listening." He climbed in the car and shut the door.

I laughed as I got in the other side, "Why weren't you listening?" I knew he didn't really care about school but he could at least listen!

He looked at me smiling then touched my cheek, "I was in a hurry to get out to you."

I blushed a deep red as he moved his hand from my face. I knew he only said those things to make me blush and I tried to stop myself from doing it but I couldn't. "Shut up." I mumbled looking at my hands.

I heard his musical laughter, "You say that a lot, why?" I looked over at him and he was looking at the road. I could tell by now which faces he made with each emotion and such. Now it was clear that he was curious, I wasn't sure why but he seemed extremely curious.

"Why do you ask so many questions?" I asked looking once again at my hands.

"Well." he paused. "You are an extremely intriguing person, everything about you is different. When you do things I like to know why." he laughed slightly. "I have a small personal goal." I looked at him curiously, "I want to know everything about you in a span of only three years."

Jasper smiled at me then looked back at the road. He was driving under the speed limit for some reason. "Well how are you doing so far?" I smiled at him and he reached over grabbing my hand.

"Well when your embarrassed your hands become the center of your focus." he smirked and I looked at my hands. He was right. "Another thing about your hands is when your nervous you bite the tips of your fingers."

He was looking at me and I nodded, "Well you got those two things right, what else do you know?" he let go of my hand and laughed.

"Well your favorite colors differ from black, green, neon green, purple, and neon yellow." he looked a me to see if he was right, I nodded smiling. "Your favorite Disney movie is "Fox and The Hound." your favorite American cartoon is Spongebob, and your favorite anime is Fruits Basket and your favorite manga is Naruto."

"Well you have the basics down what about the hard stuff?" He laughed, "What's so funny?" I banged my hand on the top of the arm rest even though it hurt I didn't let him know.

"Ok your hiding you pain right now and you always do that when I'm around.." he scolded me. "I hate it when you do that by the way."

"Sorry." I was about to look at my hands then made myself look out the window. I didn't want him to be right at the moment.

"Don't be sorry." He sighed and looked at me, "You just shouldn't do that." Jasper sped up a little, "Any way, your ambidextrous, your double jointed in your thumbs, when you draw you have to have slower music on, and you literally can't sleep smiling."

"I guess you do know me." He laughed lightly as we pulled up to his house.

"Why is her car here?" he didn't mean for me to hear him but I did, I looked at the yard and my mother's car was in the drive way.

We both got out of the hummer and walked towards the house. I didn't think my mother even knew where the Cullen's lived but I guessed she did. In the pit of my stomach I could feel that something was wrong, I wasn't sure what but something was off. By the look on Jasper's face I could tell that he was having the same feelings I was. The fact that Jasper looked worried, I knew that something was wrong.

He pulled me close to him but didn't look at me, he just kept walking with his jaw tight. When we walked in the door I saw my mother with her back to us sitting on the couch. Dominic was in the corner holding Alice's hand, it was obvious he had been crying.

"Mom?" I managed to choke out as Jasper pulled me to him. I looked back at him shocked . He never used that kind of strength or anything like that with me, I knew something was wrong now.

My mother stood up and looked at me, "Oh Joanna!" She cried out with tears breaking her voice. I felt Jasper let go of me and my mother embraced me tightly and I couldn't help but crying. "Your grandpa had a heart attack."

I couldn't move, I couldn't cry, I couldn't even breath. My grandpa was like my world, I was his favorite out of anyone, even his kids. I couldn't believe that this was happening. I wouldn't believe that this was actually happening, I couldn't believe it. The voices became nothing more than a whisper as I gripped my mothers shirt. Things seemed to disappear as the voices stopped all together, my mind spun as nausea crept into my stomach. The last thing I remember was Jasper's voice yelling my name as I slipped into darkness.

When I awoke I was laying on something soft and I was strangely warm. I slowly forced my eyes open and instantly knew where I was. Large vanity, huge bed, extremely expensive furniture, I was in Rosalie and Emmett's room. I had been in here one before when Rosalie thought I needed some thing more fancy for a necklace. I looked around and saw Rosalie sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Joanna!" She said as she moved to my side faster than my eyes could see. I looked at her as she put her cold hand on my forehead and looked at me, "Are you okay? I was so worried." From her tone she seemed more like a mother than anything else.

"I'm fine." My voice was quiet and weak as I spoke. I was still in shock, the reality hadn't yet sunk in. The numbness of not believing was as present as ever. "what happened." what was suppose to be a question sounded like a statement,

She looked in the corner of the room and I saw nothing but she sighed, "After you found out you just blacked out, your mother and Carlisle tried to wake you up but you wouldn't. Your mom called your dad and he came over so Jasper left, we think he went hunting but I'm not sure." I nodded slowly as she spoke.

"Where are they?" I asked with my voice cracking. My throat was sore and I had a massive headache. I was sure I ether hit the floor of Jasper when I fell.

"Downstairs." she looked at me and sighed, "I'll get you water and medicine." Before I could thank her or say anything she was out of the room.

I looked at the door and wanted her back, I didn't want to be alone right now, there was something comforting about another person's voice. "That's not why he left." My eyes flashed to the corner of the room as Emmett walked into the light. If I hadn't been in the state I was in then I would have gasped. Emmett looked sick, the markings around his eyes were more pronounced and he looked even paler. His eyes no longer held the same light they had before, he looked like the corpse he was suppose to be. "He couldn't be around you right now with all the sadness, no matter how hard he tried your emotions wouldn't change."

His voice was flat and dry as he spoke, "Oh." was all I could manage to say. It stung that jus because I was upset Jasper couldn't be around me. However I knew I had never felt this way before, and with my mother and Dominic in the room as well then it must have been hard.

Emmett made a choking sound as his large frame hit the ground, his body shook as he grabbed his hair. I stared at him unsure of what was going on, I had never seen him like this, and I hated. "I hate this!" He yelled through gritted teeth as he put his hands to his chest. "All of them gone, and I have to do it forever!" He shook more and I realized what was wrong with him. "He was my baby brother, the only one left… now he's gone." I felt the tears fall from my eyes as it hit me. Emmett was my great uncle, my grandfathers brother. Every member of his family was gone, he was going to suffer forever, all of them were.

He hit the floor and it crumbled under his fist, "The last thing I ever told him was to get the hell away from me!" he sat back and looked at the ceiling. "He only wanted to play baseball with me, but I wouldn't." his shoulders fell and he looked foreword. Nether of us spoke just looked at each other, it seemed that we were thinking the same thing. The person who meant the world to us, was gone…

**Ok I want you guys to tell me what you thought of how Emmett reacted, should it stay the same or should it change? please review telling em or pm me, i will be putting mroe of him in the story like this so I need your help! **


	21. Animals

**Okay well I finally updated! Yay me right??? Well Merry Christmas to all this is your present from me! Any way I have done it! This is my favorite chapter of this whole story! I love the way I made Emmett act at the end, it just adds to his character which not many people do! If you like the way he acts or don't like it review and tell me why! I'm sorry if it seems rushed I did this in one day and I am happy with it!**

It seemed as if nothing was left of me, my grandfather meant the world to me and now he was gone. Now as I saw Emmett on the ground, the strongest person I knew, in my heart I felt as if there was no way I could continue. My mother had already told me that there was no way he was going to survive. I felt as if I couldn't go on, but I knew I had to. Things would never be the same, something would always be wrong, but I had to live with it, I knew I did, no matter how hard it was.

I sat on Rosalie and Emmett's bed as Rosalie held Emmett. She came in after she heard him yelling, she dropped the glass on the way up here running only human pace when my mother could see her. They weren't talking he was just holding her or she was holding him. I laid my head against the wall and let tears slowly fall from my eyes. I didn't ever bother trying to hold them in, there was no stopping these tears. They were the kind that no matter how you looked, how happy of a face you put on, you couldn't stop crying.

I felt a cold hand on my shoulder, I looked over and looked at Jasper who was standing over me. I tried to smile but I wasn't able to, he ran his long fingers through my hair. Very slowly he sat down next to me and grabbed my hand. I wasn't sure why but I was slightly angry with him only holding my hand. Right now I wanted him to hold me, to tell me he loved me and that it would be alright, but all he did was hold my hand.

He looked at his siblings and sighed, I looked at him confused. Jasper stood up pulling me with him, he didn't say anything but led me out of the room and down to the living room. I tried to pull my arm away from him but he walked out of the door still dragging me with him. We didn't stop walking until we were deep in the forest, he stopped and looked down at me. For a moment he didn't speak or move, he just looked at me. Slowly however he wrapped his arms around me and buried his face in my hair.

"I'm sorry I didn't say anything earlier." his mumbled voice said as he kissed my cheek. "I'm not good at being overly physical when people are around." he admitted as he pulled away from me but still holding me to him.

"It's okay." I said quietly as I laid my head against his chest. I didn't want to talk, if I talked to much I knew I would start crying again.

"Tell me what your thinking?" his voice was quiet as he rubbed my back, His hand was moving in a pattern on my back almost putting me to sleep.

"I can't imagine life without him." I grabbed his shirt and bit my lip as the tears threatened to fall. "Things are never going to be the same." I whimpered as the tears fell.

"It will be okay. I know it doesn't seem like it now but I promise it will be." Jasper grabbed my face and made me look at him. "Trust me, I would never lie to you Joanna. It will be okay, it is always going to hurt but it will be okay." he pressed his hard cold lips to my forehead.

"When?" I asked weakly as I clutched onto him my tears dampening his shirt. His words were true but it would take a long time for it to happen.

"It all depends on you my love." I looked up at him, "You have to do it and I can't tell you when its going to happen or how its going to happen, but I know it will." he kissed me lightly.

I couldn't help my next actions, I pressed my body against his and tried to pull him closer. He moved his hands to my waist and held me to pressing his lips harder against mine. I let out a slight moan and gripped his arms, I wasn't sure why I was acting this way but I had already started. His grip became exceedingly tight but I ignored it as I kissed him eagerly. One of his hands moved up my stomach as his other hand held me to him. Slowly he moved his hand down and started sliding it up my bare stomach. I let out a loud moan as goosebumps went up my body.

Jasper let out a loud growl and tore himself away from me holding his head. I stepped back breathing heavily as I looked at him. He was in pain, I knew I had gone to far, pushed his limits without even thinking about it. I had been so selfish about wanting him closer, about wanting a distraction. He turned away from me and leaned against a tree shaking. I tore my eyes from away him and ran away with even more tears in my eyes.

I hated myself right now, I felt so horrible for doing that to him. Jasper let out another growl and in an instant he was in front of me. "Stop it Joanna!" his voice was truly terrifying. "Don't say you hate yourself over something so stupid. If you don't remember I am a lot stronger than you I could have stopped you at any given time but I didn't!" he yelled "I am more to blame than you are!"

I looked down at my feet and bit my lip, "Stop yelling at me." I whispered not looking up.

He let out a loud sigh and I looked up at him, he ran his hand through his shaggy blond hair. "Don't think such stupid things then." he roughly pulled me to him in a hug. "I'm sorry, its just I have told you before not to blame yourself and you still do it." I looked up at him, his eyes were black but they were becoming lighter. "I love you, but I just hate it when you do that."

"I'm sorry Jasper." I whispered looking at him. He smiled slightly and kissed my head quickly. He lifted me up and carried me bridal style as we walked back to his house.

Once again I didn't speak I just held onto him as we walked through the forest. It didn't feel like we were walking more like flying, I wasn't sure if he was running or walking I kept my eye closed just holding onto him. I still felt bad about what I had done. Since I didn't have a distraction anymore I was once again thinking about my grandpa. Jasper stopped walking and I opened my eyes as he sat me down on the ground.

He grabbed my hand and we walked back into the house. The living room was still empty when we entered, we went into the kitchen where even I could hear people talking. When we arrived in the kitchen my dad was sitting next to my mom talking to Carlisle and Esme with the others around the table. They stopped talking and looked at us when we walked in.

"Joanna." My mother said as she stood up and hugged me. I hugged her back then looked at my father. He was looking at me and Jasper but he didn't say anything.

"Good you came in now. We were just discussing something that we need you two here for." Carlisle said as he stood up. I furred my brow as I looked at him as he looked at all of us.

"My mom asked us to go to Tennessee to sped time with my gad during his last few days." My father was using his military tone, so I knew he was upset. "I wanted to ask if you two would be okay with the Cullen's going with us." I was shocked by what my father just said. I guessed it was because they were our only friends and my mom was making him. There was no way my dad would ask if Jasper could go anywhere with us, it was just not going to happen.

"Yeah I would like for them to come" Dominic answered and looked at me. I simply nodded in response signaling that I wanted them to.

"Well I'm sure we would all like to go, I happy that you invited us to go with you in your unpleasant times." I couldn't help but smile as Esme showed once again why she was the nicest person ever.

My mother nodded and they started talking about plane tickets. I didn't care to hear this so I walked out of the room with my Jasper following close behind. I walked outside to get fresh air, I felt so crampt even in the large house. Jasper stood next to me as I stopped in a far position behind the house when the others came outside. Edward looked at Jasper with disappointment written on his face. Edward knew what had happened in the forest, I looked away from him as he looked over at me.

"What's going on, why are you looking at him like that?" Emmett's loud angry voice rang in my ears. I looked at him surprised, he had no reason to be angry yet he was.

"It's not my place to tell Emmett, especially when your like this." There was an urgency in Edwards voice that startled everyone but Jasper. I realized that Emmett was unstable right now, I guessed that loosing his brother was more than he could take.

"Well then its Jasper's place, and I'm not like anything, I'm like myself!" he snapped looking at Jasper.

Rosalie placed a hand on his chest but he didn't look at her. Alice and Dominic had backed away from everyone and Edward had moved in front of Bella just as Jasper had done to me. "Liar." Jasper said raising an eyebrow. "I can feel it your angry and unstable, you need to get away from Joanna." Jasper's voice was firm and it seemed the others all agreed with him.

Emmett let out a harsh laugh, "Yeah well no matter how unstable I get I'm better than that murderer. So you stay away from Joanna." I gasped as Jasper let out a vicious growl, I had never heard him growl like that. "See even now you are an uncontrollable monster!" Emmett snarled.

"Emmett!" Edward yelled as Alice pushed Dominic back and Rosalie and Bella moved out of the way. I was stuck behind Jasper until Rosalie moved me away to where they were. "Both of you calm down!"

"Tell me why your were looking at him that way!" I flinched back as Emmett yelled. Rosalie put her arms around me and I could see the worry written on her face. "I know it has something to do with Joanna. Tell me what that sick bastard did to her!"

A great snarl ripped from Jasper's chest as he crouched down, "I did nothing that she didn't want!" his tone was low and menacing, then he got louder. "When you want to try to pick a fight with someone try to pick someone you have a chance of beating you child!"

I whimpered and closed my eyes as Bella, Alice and Rosalie pushed Dominic and I back. "What exactly did she want?" Emmett crouched down and looked at Jasper, "Old man?"

"Knock it off, this isn't the time for fighting! You are both acting like children!" Edwards cries went unanswered.

"She wanted everything…" Jasper was unable to finish his sentence. Emmett let out a loud snarl and tackled Jasper.

Jasper picked Emmett up by his shoulders and threw him on the ground making the ground shake under me. I watched in terror as Emmett pushed Jasper against a tree knocking it over. Jasper lunged for Emmett faster than I could see going straight for his throat. Emmett began to pound his fist into Jasper's head. Edward was yelling at them to stop and Rosalie was watching just as terrified as I was. Emmett grabbed Jaspers throat but Jasper was able to get out of his grip. They looked truly freighting, they bother looked like true vampires. There bodies collided like rock against rock, they were both baring there teeth.

Jasper jumped on Emmett's back knocking him to the ground . As he looked up the old vampire came back. His eyes were red and he looked like a monster, I was truly afraid. opened his mouth and lowered his mouth to Emmett's throat. I let out a scream but I didn't see what Jasper did next, Rosalie had picked me up and ran me back to the house. She ran to fast for my parents to see then sat me on her bed. I was still wide eyed .

"Joanna." Rosalie sat next to me and took my hand, "I am so sorry you had to see that, you have no idea how bad I feel. I should have taken you out of there first time they yelled."

"Why was he like that?" I was shaking badly.

"Emmett lost his only other living relative, he was angry. Angry at himself, when he saw Edward look at Jasper like that I guess he knew something happened with you. You and Dominic are his only remaining family that he is close to, when something bad happened to you he lost it."

I felt the tears coming from my eyes, "Instead of being there for me they fight!" I yelled hitting my fist against my legs.

"They are like animals right now." Rosalie spoke slowly, as if she was being careful. "Emmett feels like your father and Jasper is your mate, he wants to take you away and Emmett isn't ready to let go. Due to loosing his brother, something kicked in and he lost it."

Animals, we were all like animals. Earlier Jasper and I were like animals with desire, and the yelling, they were being territorial animals, and the fighting was all animalistic. We were all animals humans and vampires.

**Well did you like the way he acted did you not like something? Was it rushed please tell me! Review everyone! **


	22. 3000 feet in the air

**Well I have to say I am really sorry about this, I haven't updated in so long! I do have a valid reason why, for starters I spent two weeks in the hospital, my uncle died, and school has been hell! Any way this chapter is in the middle this stories conflict, so needless to say it will end soon! However I already have the plot to the sequel of this story! So yeah this one is almost done look for maybe seven or eight more chapters, it may seem like a lot but I will be updating a lot, I will update every week end that I'm sure of unless some tragedy happens. And I will try to update other times! Well I hope you like it and don't worry things will get better. Oh and could someone beta this story?? I need a Beta reader bad so if someone could do that for me I would love you!**

The next two days seemed as if they didn't happen, it was a complete blur to me. I didn't talk to anyone and they didn't attempt to talk to me either, they seemed to know I didn't want to be talked to. I thanked God my parents were busy planning the trip so they were simply to busy to bother me. Edward had told Bella and Alice not to talk to me, I heard him say that as I left their house that day. Rosalie and Emmett didn't talk to me because I told Rosalie not to bother me and I'm sure she told him. Dominic and I didn't talk but he was in my room with me often, I wasn't sure why but I think he was afraid to leave me alone.

Jasper hadn't even tried to talk to me, I had only seen him once after that incident and then he didn't even look at me. The only physical contact we had for those whole two days was Jasper putting his hand on my shoulder. For some reason I wanted more, I wanted him to hold me, not talk just hold me. I didn't need words all I needed was him to hold me. I knew he was ashamed, I had felt it in the emotions he was putting off. I wasn't sure if he meant to let me feel it but I did, he felt so bad about what he did, and I didn't have the ability to tell him that it didn't matter. I couldn't lie to Jasper, it just didn't feel right.

When I was packing my things for the trip, Dominic sat in the corner of my room watching me. He had done his packing yesterday but I was too tired when I heard my mom telling Dominic so I didn't do it. I packed my most normal clothes, no odd colored skinny jeans and no shirts with anything different on them. Hell I didn't even bring hair spray! I didn't even bother doing my hair this morning; I was going to be drained from the plane ride anyway. Dressing up as if nothing was wrong didn't seem like the right thing to do, it just seemed so… well I didn't know but it didn't feel right. Downstairs my mother yelled that we were leaving in five minutes.

I walked into the bathroom and looked around seeing if I had forgotten anything in there. I looked in the mirror; my black hair fell in soft thick ringlets around my pale face. My make up was normal as I had always done it, the think black eyeliner. I had been having problems sleeping at night. Nightmares plagued my sleep, I would wake up screaming and then things would be in my room, sometimes they were silent, other times they would make ghastly groaning sounds as if they were trying to communicate. Other times they would reach out and try to touch me, each time it happened the hand would simply go through me.

As I closed my eyes I sighed, hearing my parents downstairs telling us it was time to go. I walked out of the bathroom and picked up my bag, Dominic looked at me then left the room. Slowly I followed him down the stairs. Once I reached the bottom of the stares I stopped, I no longer wanted to go. I realized that this was probably the last time I would see my grandfather. Leaving this house meant that we would be going to see a man basically already dead. We wouldn't be going if it wasn't that bad, my grandfather had a heart attack before and we didn't go see him. Why would we be going this time for any other reason? I knew he was bad, and in my heart I knew he was going to die.

Dominic stopped walking and looked back at me, he closed his eyes then walked over to me. Slowly he put his arm around me, "Come on Joanna." He said quietly, making him the first person to speak to me in two days.

My father took the bags from Dominic and I and put them in the back with the other things. Silently we all got in the car, no music, no games, no cell phones, just looking out the window, it was a somber feeling really. As we drove to the air port in Huntington I thought of Jasper. I was feeling the grave feelings of my family, I could since it all around me . I wondered how he could stand it, how could he be around people when they were sad? So many people would be at the house, and I knew he would go there, every person who entered or left that house would be grieving and he would have to deal with it. Suddenly I realized why he stopped killing humans, why he felt so bad every time he would come close to slipping up. The emotions of those people became to much, he couldn't block their emotions out so each time he took a life he felt their fear, pain sadness, even regret, he could feel everything. Never had I been so happy not to have the powers I used to dream about having.

The trees soon turned to buildings and my mother turned on the radio, it was country, a song that was upbeat and happy but it didn't change the feeling. I knew the reason she turned on the radio, she was tired of the silence and the sadness of the people around her. If there was one thing I knew about my mother it was that she hated tension, she didn't like anything uncomfortable. I looked at her, she looked older than ever, the lines on her face seemed to be more visible than ever. My father looked even older than my mother, the war already made him look old and now this. Dominic had been spending most of his time with Alice, was always good for him, if he needed something then she was the one who was there for him.

When we pulled up to the air port the Culllen's were waiting there for us, Alice, Edward, and Bella were talking with Esme and Carlisle. Rosalie and Emmett were holding hands talking near by, I could tell she was trying to comfort him. Jasper was standing on the other side of their car looking at the sky, when the others looked up he didn't even budge. I felt a sting of hurt as the others smiled at us and walked closer to us and he stayed back. Alice however walked over towards Jasper and not Dominic. He looked at her then turned to our parents, as his girlfriend looked up at Jasper.

I strained my ears to try and hear what they were saying but of course I couldn't hear a thing. I furred my brow and bit my lip looking at Rosalie and Emmett, he looked ad me then looked away, Rosalie put a hand on him shoulder and he nodded. The others were talking but I wasn't listening to them, I looked over at Jasper and Alice. She grabbed his hand then he bent down and embraced her tightly. As I saw this I suddenly felt extremely jealous, I looked away with my jaw clenched, I could feel tears come to my eyes but held them back. Jasper could hug her but he couldn't even be around me?

Edward looked over at Alice and Jasper then quickly turned to me, me made a move to come over to me but I shook my head and turned away from him. Alice skipped over to me and she put her hand on my shoulder smiling. Nothing looked wrong with her smile, she looked happy, not anything out of the ordinary. I wasn't sure why I felt this way exactly, maybe it was because of the things that had been happening lately. I looked over at Jasper as a hard shock of jealousy hit me, he was smiling faintly, not much but more than I was sure he had done lately. Jasper's eyes quickly hit me and his smile faded. He looked at me curiously then looked at Edward, as his gaze shifted back to me I felt my lip tremble and the tears pricked the back of my eyes as I turned away.

"The plane leaves soon, we should get on." Carlisle said calmly as he always did. Hearing his voice was usually soothing, but it didn't soothe anything now. I brusquely walked away from Jasper as he started towards me. I followed closely behind my father not looking at anyone, I didn't want to talk to anyone or even look at anyone now.

We gave the lady at the counter our tickets and boarded the plane. I took my seat which was in the middle of the first class section of the plain but in the front of our group. I took the window seat knowing it was someone I knew who was sitting next to me and they wouldn't care. Across the isle on the other side was Rosalie and Emmett, Behind them were Alice and Dominic, then Carlisle and Esme. On my side Edward and Bella were seated behind us then my parents. As I looked at the people I inwardly groaned, that meant Jasper was seated by me, earlier I would have liked the opportunity, I knew he wouldn't talk to me but maybe I could have gotten him to. Now however I wanted to be no where near him.

I felt the seat next to me move as Jasper sat down, I reached down and grabbed my carry on bag. The only things in there was a jacket, a teddy bear Jasper had gotten me, my ipod, and my grandfathers journal that he kept while he was in the army. I took my I pod out of the bag as well as the journal. I placed the ear buds in my ears and didn't even listen to the flight attendant, I had heard it before and I didn't want to listen to her. I opened the journal and sighed , I began reading the pages, as I did memories of the man I loved so much flooded my mind.

_I was seven years old sitting on the fence watching my grandfather rope cows, he was trying to teach Dominic. However no matter how many times Dominic tried, he just couldn't do it. He would swing it above his head and it would fall and hit his head. Both grandpa and I would laugh but he never gave up on Dominic and he wouldn't let him quit ether. After two hours of trying Dominic managed to rope a calf that my grandpa was holding still. He jumped up and down and was yelling how he did it, he, dropped the rope and ran inside to tell my parents who were watching form the window from time to time. _

"_Grandpa!" I yelled jumping down off the fence and running over to him. He looked at me and laughed as he picked up the rope. "Can you teach me that?" I asked him smiling._

_Slowly he shook his head smiling, I looked at him frowning, "I'm afraid not Joanna." he patted my head and I began to protest but he silenced me. "Now let me tell you why, your brother has worked so hard the past two hour. Now he is so damn proud of himself and if you come in here and do it quicker and better then him and that's going to take all his happiness away." _

_I nodded and smiled at him, "I guess he can have this." he laughed and nodded. _

"_That's my girl" He smiled and picked me up putting me on his shoulders as we walked back in the house. _

I smiled, he was always fair, if he knew I could do something better than Dominic, he wouldn't let me do it if Dominic was proud of it. When I was small it would make me mad at times but I understand him now. I remember how much he looked like an older version of Emmett. He had thick curly brown hair, and his eyes were brown, the same color I imagine Emmett had. He was also a big man just as Emmett was, I bet that they looked the same, if they had ever been the same age, they probably passed as twins. As I thought about their similarities another memory came into my mind.

_I was sitting on the couch watching tv, Scooby Doo, my childhood best friend. The adults were in the kitchen or outside making dinner for the fourth of July. My mom, Grandmother, and my Aunt Cecilia were in the kitchen making salads and potatoes or whatever they want to make. My Dad, grandpa, Uncle Tim, Cecilia's husband and my uncle Gregory were Barbequing outside. Aunt Cecilia and Uncle Gregory are my fathers siblings, they were all born with in four years of each other, Cecilia is the youngest, my father is in the middle and Gregory is the oldest. _

_I was sitting in the living room with Dominic as my cousins were upstairs. I was thankful for that, I could stand Allen, Ben, Spencer, and John, but Bridget, I wanted to kill her. She was little miss perfect, she always wore dresses and if I had something she wanted it. She was Uncle Gregory's only child from his failed marriage with a woman from California. Which of course meant she got everything she could possibly want, she was the biggest brat in the entire world. I loathed the very ground she walked on. One time when I was nine I got a teddy bear for Christmas that she wanted, she tore mine up and I told on her, needless to say she said I tore it up to get her in trouble, I got nothing back her daddy bought her the bear. _

_Well I was getting bored of the tv so I stood up and walked over to the china cabinet that was in the side of the room. There were Grandpa's war metals, Grandma's porcelain dolls, and pictures. There were different pictures, of my grandparents wedding, our family, all sorts of pictures. One that really caught my eye was one of a woman and a man standing with three boys. All three boys had dark curly hair, one stood tall above the rest, even the older man who I presumed to be the father was shorter than him. The other boy was short but didn't look that much younger than the tall one, he wasn't muscular and wore glasses. The smallest looked around nine or ten, my age. He was smiling a big toothy grin and was holding the woman's hand. _

_I heard the door open and I looked over my shoulder and saw my grandfather, "Hey grandpa, who's that?" I asked. _

_He looked over at me and smiled slightly. He slowly made his way over to me and sighed, "That's my family." He smiled and took the picture off the shelf. I looked at him curiously as he picked me us and put me in his lap. "That's me, my mom, my dad, my brother Tommy and." he paused, "My brother."_

_I looked at him curiously, why didn't he give the tall one a name? "Who's that you didn't say his name." _

_Grandpa looked at me, he sighed and put the picture back. "His name is Emmett, he died a month after this picture." I looked at him with wide eyes. _

"_How!" I whispered looking at him. _

"_No one knows really." He patted my head. "However these are not stories for a little girl." he stood up and smiled, "Its time to eat." I nodded and followed him. _

I now know why they didn't know how he died, they never found his body. I wondered why I didn't notice that Emmett looked like Emmett in the picture. I sighed, I guess I never thought about it before. I shuddered as I remembered that Bridget would be there. I hadn't seen her in a while, maybe she had changed, but I highly doubted it. I felt something tug at my hair but soon realized that Jasper was playing with my curls.

I thought about ignoring him but I simply couldn't, he kept doing it and it was making me mad. I pulled my ear buds out and looked at him "Stop." I hissed quietly.

Jasper looked at me and furred his brow, "Why?" He asked quietly. I jerked my head away as he tried to touch my hair.

"Because I just don't want you to." I snapped trying to stay quiet. He opened his mouth to say something but I stopped him, "I don't want to talk to you ether!" I put the ear buds back in my ears. I honestly didn't want to talk to him, he just made me so angry.

He pulled the ear buds out of my ears and took my ipod off of my lap putting it in his pocket. "What did I do!" asked looking at me angrily. "I know that it isn't from the other day. I could feel that you were over that so tell me why you won't talk to me!" his eyes were locked with mine. He grabbed my hand and he was sending me his emotions. As I felt the hot tears prick the back of my eyes I pulled my hand away and turned away from him.

"Just leave me alone." I whispered knowing he would hear me. As the tears fell from my eyes I put my head against the window.

"What is it?" Jasper's voice broke as he spoke, "I can't stand your feelings right now. This sadness and pain, I hate it!" he was pleading as he spoke. "Is it your grandpa, me, Emmett, your dad, what is it Joanna!"

He grabbed my arm and I almost forgot that I had to keep my voice down. "Why don't you just talk to Alice." I snapped and looked at him. "You seem to enjoy her company more than mine so just go sit with her!" I turned away from him and glared at the window

"What the hell do you mean!" He said louder than he should have. I looked over at Rosalie and Emmett who were looking at us, behind them Alice was staring at me shaking her head whispering to Rosalie.

"You know what I mean!" I crossed my arms and was determined not to look at anyone.

Jasper let out a laughing sound, "No I don't know what you mean so an explanation would be great!" as he spoke he was sarcastic and I could tell he was angry.

"What I mean is you can't stand to touch me or talk to me, hell you can't even look at me!" My voice was quiet and I was having a hard time keeping it that way. "But oh no when Alice goes over to you, you two have a nice little chat and then you hug. Is that why you didn't talk to me or anything? Because you were getting all of your talking done with Alice?" I glared at him with tears in my eyes. "If you didn't want me anymore because I caused that fight then you should have just told me." I put my head in my hands and bit my lip.

Jasper didn't say anything, he didn't move he just sat there. Slowly I looked over at him, his face was black of any emotions but I was sure he was feeling so many things. I recognized this, he shut off, he was closed to me. Just as he had been when we first met, closed, quiet and distant. I wished he would just yell at me or some thing, this was horrible. I hated this, he was ignoring me, if he would just yell at me I would know something.

"Talk to me." I whispered slowly placing my hand on his lightly. He jerked his hand away from me faster than I could even see. "Jasper." my voice broke as I spoke. He however continued to ignore me, he was perfectly still and not talking.

For the rest of the plane ride nether of us spoke, the silence was killing me. I wanted some form of communication, but I got nothing. Each time I tried to talk to him or anything he turned away form me or just sat there. I looked over at Rosalie, Emmett and Alice, Rosalie looked at me with concerned look on her face same as Emmett did. Alice looked as if she was going to cry, she mouthed I'm sorry just as the plane touched the ground. While we waited to be able to leave the plane I lightly touched Jasper's back as we were standing. He loosed his posture and he lowered his head, for a moment I thought he was going to say or do something but second later we were able to leave and he took off.

I just stood there with my hand in the air in the same position as I had been before. "I'm so sorry Joanna." I looked over and saw Alice standing there looking at her hands. She looked up at me, "I didn't know you would take it bad. He has been sad, he felt horrible for letting you see him like that, for loosing control. He didn't talk to anyone, nothing he stayed in his room, he only hunted because he was forced to." she look a deep breath and wrapped her arms around me, "I had a vision of the two of you, you were in the forest. You had a video camera and you were laughing and so was he, I couldn't hear your words but you were happy. I told him because I thought it would make him happy, and it did." She let go of me and we started walking off the plane. "But you saw the wrong part of the conversation, you didn't know anything and though the worst, its my fault I'm so sorry."

I looked at her and shook my head, "Its okay Alice." I said as we exited the plane. As I looked at Jasper I realized that I probably lost the love of my life from 3,000 feet in the air.

**Well there it is, it ended a bit different than most but it had to end that way. Trust me I debated over and over again on if I wanted to end it like this but I decided to go with this ending because it makes the rest of the story better. I hope this is something you like, and well tell me what you like or don't like about it. Oh and I have realized something about myself… I write faster with more reviews…so yeah review and I will update sooner!**


	23. Through that door

**I know I told you all that I would post every weekend unless there was a tragedy well there was. My uncle died. We were really close and I love him so much. I wasn't in the mood to write at all so I did noting. Well about four days ago I got an inspiration for this story. This chapter was going to be MUCH longer but I decided to split it. I have been only able to write at school so that's why I'm putting this is two pieces! **

**This story is For my Great Uncle R.I.P**

As we made our way to the hospital my mind was blank. I didn't want to think of anything because everything in my life at this moment was going wrong. Things were wrong with my family, with school, with my friends, and once again things were wrong with Jasper and I. I was tired of things being wrong, I had learned all to well that as soon as things got good something bad would come and crush that as if it was never there.

Jasper was once again not talking to me and now he was angry about it as well. Alice felt horrible and that was my fault. I did think that she should have told me about her vision so this didn't happen but I didn't blame her for anything. I'm also sure Edward didn't like hearing our thoughts.

My family was in our car on the rode to the hospital while the Cullen's were in theirs on the way to the hotel we were staying in. They had to go to the hotel soon because if they didn't the reservations would be no good. My parents as well and Carlisle and Esme had their own rooms. Bella, Rosalie, Alice and I had to share a room. The same thing was the case for Dominic, Emmett, Edward and Jasper. At the moment I wasn't looking foreword to staying with Alice.

Looking over at Dominic I noticed he was texting, I figured it was Alice. There was no expression on his face. I wondered to myself if he was mad at me for being angry with Alice earlier. With my luck he was, I'm sure by now he knew what had happened and blamed me for her being upset.

When my phone vibrated I pulled it out and looked at the screen, Edward. I rolled my eyes and looked at the message.

"He isn't mad at you. Dominic I mean." I looked out the window behind us and the Cullen's car was still behind us.

"I hate it when you read my mind." I sent back leaning my head out the window.

"Your mind is screaming now so I have to hear it."

I rolled my eyes and sighed, "Yeah sorry I have a lot on my mind." I was talking about Jasper and I knew he knew that as well, even if he couldn't read my mind.

"Jasper is difficult, but to tell the truth he is angrier at Alice than he is at you."

"NO! Make him stop he shouldn't be mad at her!" I put my head in my hands and Dominic looked over at me but said nothing.

"He wouldn't listen if I did. He blames her for the fight." I didn't notice we had pulled up to the hospital until Edward sent me his final message "I'll try to talk to him, bye"

My heart was pounding in my chest as we parked. I put my phone back in my pocket and took a deep breath as I got out of the truck. The realization was ever too real, at home I could tell myself that this wasn't happening but now it was real. There could no longer be any denial or pretending as if everything was okay. No matter how hard I tried to tell myself this was a bad dream, it wouldn't work now.

Absent minded I grabbed Dominic's hand. I half way expected him to pull away but he pulled me closer to him. I had never been more thankful for him than I was at that moment. He had been my protection and my comfort zone for so long that I felt lost when I didn't know where he was. Our connection was amazing, we had been the only ones that were there for the other for so long that we could feel almost everything the other felt and we knew what the other was going to say.

As he pulled me close I almost felt as safe as I did with Jasper. We walked into the hospital in some surreal state that I couldn't comprehend. Walking down the halls felt so unreal, I wished it wasn't happening. I could try and force myself to pretend it wasn't real but there was no use in doing that now. We walked inot the main waiting room and our parents told us to wait there while they found the right room number.

I looked around at the hospital, I wasn't sure how my mom or Carlisle did it. The rooms looked as if you were going insane and the smell was so revolting. I knew I would never be able to do the job they did, see dying people every day and maybe even dead people. My parents came back and told us where his room was, the four of us walked down the hall to room 402. My parents walked in with Dominic following soon after.

I wanted to go in but I was frozen in my spot. My legs wouldn't move, no matter how hand I tried to make them move they simply wouldn't. The thought of him lying there in bed looking so weak was something I didn't want to see. I wasn't sure if I could handle it. I grew up knowing him to be so strong and that was the image I wanted of him for the rest of my life not a weak old man who couldn't move. Yet I knew that was what I was going to see. With a deep breath I pushed the door open.

**Reviews keep me going so the more you review the faster my fingers move and if you want an update with in the next week then review!!! If I get enough reviewers then I promise to update with in the week!! **


	24. Almost Perfect Edited and fixed

**_Okay well no matter how many times I tried I never got the whole chapter put in! It cut out a bit towords the end so go read it. _**

**I am so proud of myself for this! I updated and I love all of your comments you guys are the best reviewers in the entire world. Well I have to say this is my favorite chapter and I have the rest of this story planned out so yeah I'm sure this one is my favorite! I hope you all like it, I really do and its long so it should make you all happy!**

I had never expected to see someone and know that they were dying just by looking at them, but at this moment looking at my grandfather I knew he was going to leave soon. Tubes were all over coming out of his mouth and hooked up to his chest, then looking at his face he looked old and tired, something had had never seen in him. He looked as if one touch would break him, nothing about this seemed right at all. He was so strong now he was weak...

I watched my mother and father as they went over to him. My father was seated in a chair while my mother stood behind him looking at my grandfather. They smiled at something he said which I couldn't hear, he was speaking to quietly. Dominic was looking at them but he was staying back just as I was. Either of us was brave enough to go up to him. I walked over to my brother and laid my head on his shoulder. He looked down at me and then back at our grandfather.

He didn't seem to notice us but he looked me and smiled waving me over. My breath was caught in my throat, I wasn't sure if I could handle going over there. Once again my legs wouldn't move, they were stuck under me like dead weights that couldn't possibly be moved. I knew I would break down crying if I went over there but i didn't know if I could not go over to him. "Joanna." he called out in a loud raspy voice. I couldn't stop myself now. Slowly I walked over to him and leaned down by his bed as he grabbed my hand.

"Hi." my voice was quiet as I looked at him. He looked even weaker up close, things were just to different. I remember being a little girl and thinking that he was the strongest man to ever walk this earth, I wanted that back, I didn't like this.

He touched my face as I tried to fight back the tears. "I can tell you've been crying princess." I bit my lip, he always called me princess. "It doesn't suit you, I like it when you smile. Just like your grandma says you light up a room with that smile!" he laughed and I nodded.

"I know she dose." I whispered as I continued to fight back the tears. It was harder than I thought it could be, my eyes burnt as I stopped the tears.

"I have never told you this but you know who you have always reminded me of?" he looked down and I knew he was having a hard time saying what he wanted to. I had no idea who he thought I was like, I couldn't think of anyone. "You remind me of my big brother Emmett." my eyes widened as Emmett's face came into my mind. Their was no stopping the tears now, they came pouring down as he continued. "He was always so strong and no matter what anyone told him he never tried to be like anyone else. He was always smiling and always happy, he just lit up a room." he laughed. "You even look like him, every time I see you I think of him."

As I wiped my eyes the tears continued to fall slightly. "I'm glad I do." i put my head on his hands as my body shook as I failed at trying to hold in the tears.

"Joanna you have to be happy." I looked up at him, "No matter what happens you have to keep smiling, people come and go from this world at a moments notice. This won't be the last time you lose anyone but you have to move on my princess." I shook my head, how could he tell me to get over it? "Do it for me, I am going to be watching you and nothing would break my heart more than to know that you aren't happy." I hugged him as my body shook with sobs. "You promise me you will do this?"

I nodded, "I promise papa." I cried as he patted my back. "I love you."

"I love you to princess." he hugged me back then I heard him laugh, "You make sure that Jasper boy treats you right." I heard my mother laugh and knew that she told him about Jasper. "As long as he is good to you then he is fine but the second he hurts my princess all hell will break loose."

"Yes sir." He patted my cheek and kissed my forehead. As he called Dominic over to him I moved away and hugged my mom.

She held me tightly and she patted my hair. "Come here please." i looked at my dad and my shoulders fell. I didn't want to talk to him but I guess I had to.

I followed him into the hall as I heard Dominic laugh. I stood there looking at him, he was standing straight. "What do you want." I asked rudely.

He sent me a look and I looked away from him, "I want to talk to you about Jasper."

I groaned, "Dad I don't want to hear how much you don't like him or how you want me to stay away from him. So if that's what you are going to say don't bother."

"I wanted to tell you something completely different but if you keep up the attitude then I won't." I looked at the ground and said nothing. "Better. I wanted to tell you that as long as your careful then I can't stop you form being with him." I looked up at him with wide eyes, did he really just say that? I never imagined hearing him say that, it just didn't seem possible.

"You mean that?" I asked looking at him trying not to act to excited.

"Yes Joanna." He said smiling. I let out a squeal and hugged him tightly, "I realized I overreacted and that you are smart enough not to do anything stupid."

I laughed and kissed his cheek, "Thank you daddy!" I said hugging him again.

"I love you Jojo." he let me go and I smiled bigger than I had in a long time.

He walked back in the room and I was on cloud nine. Suddenly that cloud plummeted to the ground hard. Jasper wasn't even talking to me, it was no goo for my dad to approve, he wanted nothing to do with me at this point. I hit myself in the head and sighed. Why did I have to mess things up with him. Just when things started to look better for us something stupid got in the way, and I was tired of it. Ether I did some thing wrong or Jasper did, it didn't matter who caused the problem the only thing I was sure of was that it had to stop.

My family came out of the doctors office and I looked at them confused, "He needed sleep he asked us to tell you to goodnight." my mother said as I nodded. I really wanted to tell him bye but if he wanted sleep I had no right to bother him.

When we arrived at the hotel we were staying in it was already dark. The hotel was really nice but I couldn't expect anything less with my mother and Esme making the plans. This hotel was one of the big ones, it had seven floors and well it was just amazing, there was no way of describing this place. It was honestly the best hotel I had even been in, I wondered if the Cullen's always traveled like this.

I found out that my parents floor was on the fifth floor as well as my brothers. Mine however was on the sixth, it turned out that there were no other available rooms on the fifth floor. My parents were staying in room 582, Esme and Carlisle were in room 585 and my brother and the other guys room was a mystery to me. My father might have accepted Jasper but me knowing where his room was, wasn't part of the plan. My own room with the other girls was 619, right above my parents I learned from looking at the map in the hall.

When the full glass elevator stopped at the fifth floor my parents and brother got off after my mother kissed my forehead and my father hugged me. As I waited for the elevator to go up again I saw Jasper open the door for Dominic but he didn't see me or acted like he didn't. I wasn't sure at this time both things could have happened. I sighed as the elevator took me to my floor.

I walked up to the door and knocked once when Bella opened the door smiling. I was about to pick my bags up but she grabbed them quickly and put my things away at vampire speed. I made a mental note of how cool that would be as I looked around the room. It had two rooms, a bedroom and the small kitchen and living room like thing. The T.V was huge and it was sitting on an expensive looking dresser like thing. The bedroom was amazing it had golden colored blankets on the bed and the same T.V was in this room as there was in the other.

"How are you?" Bella asked as she waled into the bedroom with me.

"I've been better but I've been worse as well." If Jasper had been talking to me then things would be great but I messed that one up.

"That's good, Alice and Rosalie went to get a few things. They should be back soon." Just as she said that the door opened, "Like I said." she laughed as I saw Alice and Rosalie walk in with things in their arms.

They threw the packages on the bed and I could see what they were. They had placed all kinds of chocolate and cherry candies and sweets on the bed. Chocolate bars, cookies, cupcakes, and other sweets were all their. I laughed at them as they smiled, "Well i know that sweets make people feel better when they are feeling bad and you love chocolate and cherry more than anything in the world." Alice smiled

"So eat and feel better." Rosalie directed as she smiled as Alice did.

I couldn't stop myself from smiling now, I had been so worried about sharing a room with Alice and now that was all washed away. I hugged Alice tightly, "I'm sorry." I whispered knowing the others still heard me.

Her bell like laugh filled the room, "No need to be sorry Joanna." she said as I nodded and Hugged Bella and Rosalie before consuming most of the sweets.

Their was honestly no way I could have eaten all of the sweets but I did eat quite a bit of it. While I did we watched Lifetime movies and Alice did Bella's make up, much to her dismay. I loved it, that was what I needed normal girl time with friends who really cared about me. I was so happy to be acting like myself, I had always listened to my grandfather and now I was thanking him from the bottom of my heart.

"Hey dose this place have a pool?" I asked looking at them. I loved pools, swimming was one of my favorite things but I never got to do it much. When I was swimming I felt free, it was a great feeling to have, even for a little bit.

"Oh yeah it is beautiful!" Rosalie said throwing her arms in the air falling back on the bed. She was in a good mood, I knew Emmett had cheered up and I was happy for that.

"Where is it?" I asked chewing on a twisler I had taken off the bed.

"Um on the first floor, its outside in a big building go left you can not miss it!" I looked at Rosalie as I heard the others laugh. "What I'm in a good mood." she whined.

"Oh yeah I can tell." I laughed and grabbed a key card. "Anyone want to come with?" I asked looking at them.

Rosalie was about to say something but Alice stopped her and smiled, "No thanks you have fun."

"Right." I said I didn't want my parents mad at me, It wasn't really that I thought they would be mad but just to be sure I went to the elevator on the other side.

I pressed the down button and it stopped on the fifth floor. When it did a boy around my age with black hair and brown eyes got in, "Thanks." he said smiling standing a little closer than necessary to me. I looked at him, why was he saying thanks? I didn't do anything to make him thank me. "I'm Allen."

"Um Joanna." I looked away from him and and down at the people on the first floor, this thing was really slow.

"Pretty name, so where are you going?" he asked smiling as he ran his hand through his hair.

I looked at him and his pitiful flirting, I figured stop him now, "I'm going to meet my boyfriend." I lied as he moved away from me.

When we hit the second floor he hurriedly got off and I laughed slightly. When I got off the elevator I walked to the left to find the pool like Rosalie said. Their was no way you could miss it it said "Pool" in big bold letters. I walked in and was amazed, it looked like a tropical paradise. Real and fake palm trees and vines covered the room making it look amazing. In the back there was a grass hut with the hot tub under it and above that was a plain area. Past that in wood buildings was what I was guessing to be the sauna and weight room.

I walked out of the trees and things and walked up to the pool area in closed by a gate. I tried opening the gate when I noticed the pool times, the pool was closed now. I thought about going back to the room but I really wanted to be here. I climbed over the gate and landed with a thud on the decorated concrete. I walked over to the edge and looked down, the lights were turned off around so the only light that was on was the one in the pool making the whole room seem like it was a blur color. In the back corner there was a pile of rocks making a waterfall of sorts. I sat down on the edge and took off my shoes and socks dipping my feet in the water. I rolled up my pant legs and laid back and watched the water reflect on the ceiling.

The sound of the waterfall was so serene, I would love to have that sound, it was so soothing. The sound made everything seem as if it was okay, but I knew it wasn't. Things were good with my dad, in a way they were good with my grandfather, and with my friends. But everything was wrong with Jasper. We've had small petty fights before but nothing like this. Before he would yell when he got mad and now he didn't talk to me. I liked it better when he yelled, I hated the silent treatment.

"Jumping fences is usually frowned upon." I sat up straight as I heard Jasper's voice. He was looking down at me with his hands in his pockets. "mind if I join you?" he asked. His voice was off, he sounded like he did before I knew what he was. He was guarding himself and I didn't like it.

"If you want." I looked back at the pool. I didn't know why he was here but he wasn't going to take away my peaceful time if I could help it.

He was next to me before I knew it, "So how was he?" Jasper asked looking at the water.

"Fine, he just looked weak." I kicked the water slightly. The water rippled across the pool and I smiled slightly.

"Well that's good." he mummered leaning back.

"Not really." I shook my head and sighed. This was awkward and I hated to, usually I felt free as if I didn't have to worry about, this was killing me. I wanted nothing more than to hug him and tell him I love him and how my dad said he approved and how my grandfather knew about him. Sadly I couldn't do that.

"Oh." I could tell this was bothering him to but he was the one who could change it not me.

"What do you really want?" I asked looking at him finally. I couldn't take this anymore, I wasn't sure why but it was driving me crazy.

We just stared at each other for a few minutes not saying anything. "I was worried about you." he finally said.

I let out a small laugh, "Yeah right, lie better." I rolled my eyes. He wasn't here because he cared, was he?

"Why do you do that?" he asked angrily, "I say something truthful and you say I'm lying about it!" I didn't think i did things like that to much.

I looked at my hands, I wasn't sure what to say. "I don't know why." I whispered putting my hands down. "You say things that no one has ever said to me and I don't know how to react." I looked at the water. I wasn't suppose to let him bother me but I was.

I felt his cold hand grab mine and I looked over at him, "I like saying things like that to you. You are special to me and I want to make sure you know that." I bit my lip as he looked at me.

"I'm sorry." I whispered looking at our hands. His was so much bigger than mine but they seemed to fit together perfectly.

"So am I." Jasper said as I looked at him. "I shouldn't have ignored you."

"Why did you?" I asked looking at him. I really wanted to know why he ignored me, but I wanted more than what he would most likely tell me.

"I don't really know." he was still holding my hand and had now moved closer to me. "The obvious reasons are that I scared you and I was ashamed of myself. I guess the real reason was that I promised you you wouldn't have to see me like that out of your dreams but you did."

I nodded, "Why did you act like that, I mean with Emmett?" Jasper laughed and I felt stupid, "You don't have to tell me." I looked down again.

"I'm more ashamed to tell you this, I don't know how you will take it." a small smile was playing at his lips and he rubbed the back of my hand with his thumb. His guard was down now and he was my Jasper again, the way I liked him. "In my eyes you are mine, not really mine but yeah."

"I like being yours." I said quickly feeling a blush come onto my face. He smiled and let go of my hand and ran his hand down my cheek.

"Well, your mine and Emmett was trying to tell me i couldn't have you in a way. I don't like that." He shook his head. "You are my world, my existence, my everything. No one can take you away from me and that's what he was trying to do." I wasn't sure how but I figured it was something to do with what they knew and I didn't. "I don't want anything taking you from me. Anyone tries and I will make them stop."

"Jasper." my voice was quiet but me being loud wasn't necessary. "I'm not going to leave you, for anything." I wasn't trying to hold anything in now. "You always say how I mean the world to you but its not one sided. You made me feel like I was worth something, you do every day, and when I don't have you I feel like something is missing. That's why I hate fighting with you when we fight I feel as if I messed up my whole life. I am nothing with out you, i feel worthless if I don't have you."

Jasper grabbed my face and made me look at him, "How could you feel worthless?" he asked seriously. "You are far from worthless, but even when we fight I never really leave you, it's impossible I feel you where ever I am."

I nodded and he ran his thumb over my lips, I closed my eyes and he moved his hands. " Why did you thin k that I was doing anything with Alice?"

I opened my eyes and looked away from him, I wasn't sure why exactly. "I told you pretty much why on the plane. You wouldn't even look at me but Alice gets you talking to her and hugging her. That's what I wanted, she was getting what I wanted, something I couldn't have from you." I was embarrassed to tell him it was all from jealousy but I had a feeling he already knew.

"I didn't think you would want me talking to you." he admitted looking at me. "If I had been smarter I would have, but I wasn't." I felt the tears fall from my eyes and Jasper quickly grabbed my face and was looking at me, "What's wrong?" he asked.

I shook my head and pulled away from his grip, "We have to stop fighting!" I slammed my fist against my leg, "All it dose is hurt both of us, I hate it. Not talking to you kills me, no matter how long it lasts." I wiped the tears from my face but they kept coming. "We have to stop, its not good."

"I know, I don't know why I can't just get over things..."

I stopped him, "No its not just you, its me to. Both of us start stupid fights or carry them on. You can't blame yourself for this."

He laughed and nodded, "I like that, it might seem strange but not having to take the blame for everything feels good. Just having someone tell me that its not all my fault makes me feel so happy." I laughed and kissed his hand as he brought it up to my face. He sighed and wiped the tears off my face. "You are so beautiful, even when you cry." he whispered as he kissed my jaw sending jolts into the pit of my stomach.

"Such a sweetheart." i said giggling as he laughed. This was perfect, this was how things should be with Jasper and I.

He looked at my feet and smiled, "Dose that feel good?" he asked. I nodded and he took off his shoes socks and put his feet in the water next to mine.

"You have big feet." I laughed and stuck my foot next to his. I only wore a size five and I wasn't sure what size he wore other than big.

"Um thanks for pointing that out." Jasper laughed and I was happy he was being so free. This was rare he wasn't holding back or trying to tell me to say away from him. He laid back and pulled me down with him so my head was on his chest.

"This is nice." I smiled and grabbed his hand.

I saw him smile as he looked down at me, "Simply being with you is nice."

Felt myself blush again as I felt him press his lips against my head. "Why are you out here any way?" he asked.

I looked at him and smiled as the water reflected off his skin. "I love the water, it calms me down. I thought I needed that right now." I looked at the ceiling. There was a sunroof but it was closed, I wished it wasn't. I liked to look at the stars, I thought about asking my mom to paint my room like the night sky.

"You like to swim." It wasn't exactly a question but I nodded anyway. "I've never really been swimming, or not since I was human."

I sat up and looked at him, "Are you serious, you have honestly not been swimming for over a hundred years?"

He laughed and looked at me, "Why is that such a bad thing?" he asked clearly amused.

I groaned, "No but you have to swim!" I laughed and looked at the pool then turned to him smiling "Now."

Jasper looked at me curiously, "Now?" his voice was skeptical, "As in right now?"

I rolled my eyes, "What else could I mean by now?" He shook his head and I laughed.

"No, the pool is closed and we might get into trouble. " I could tell just by the look on his face that he had a different reason.

"Tell me why you really won't swim." I said as he sat up and looked at the pool. He didn't say anything he just looked at the pool.

I rolled my eyes and stood up going over to the deep end of the pool. I thanked myself for wearing an undershirt today. If I had been in nothing but my bra then this wouldn't be happening. I knew that I would have to swim in my underwear for bottoms but the only thing that made that okay was the fact that my legs would be underwater.

I took off my shirt and my undershirt came up with it, quickly I pulled it down as the blush flooded my cheeks. I could see Jasper watching me out of the corner of my eye. He was tense again, not as free as he was before. Slowly I undid my pants and pulled them off, leaving me in only a tight white undershirt and black panties with white lace. The air was cold against my skin and I could feel Jasper's eyes on me. Feeling self conscious I jumped into the water head first.

The water felt great, it wasn't to cold but it wasn't overly hot ether. I hadn't been swimming in so long that this felt new. Once again the free felling came back to me, It was amazing how much you could do underwater. The only time I felt more free than this was when I was with Jasper when he ran. I swam to the surface and moved my hair out of my face.

"You're crazy." I looked over and saw Jasper looking at me smiling.

I made my way over to him and stuck my tongue out, "You are boring so there!" he laughed and I looked at him.

"Just because I won't swim?" he asked flicking water at me.

"Jasper please." I was trying to flirt and it seemed to be working. I stuck out my bottom lip, "Please get in for me."

He looked at me and ran his fingers through his long blond hair. I could tell he was debating in his mind on whether or not to get in. I wasn't completely sure why he didn't want to get in but it was annoying, I was in so why couldn't he get in! He kept looking at me but not exactly at my face, it slightly made me feel embarrassed but I wanted him in so I might have stuck my chest out just a bit.

"I have no swim trunks!" he said shrugging.

"I don't ether, I'm in an undershirt and my underwear." I tried to splash him but of course he moved to fast.

"Oh believe me I know." he looked away form me shaking his head. If he was human he would be blushing.

I thought back to what he told me when I first saw him with out a shirt on, I told him exactly what he told me. "Like what you see?" I smirked and winked at him as he laughed.

He sat down in front of me and raised an eyebrow, "What if I do?" he ran his fingers over the side of my face.

"Then you should join me." I grabbed his hand slowly and kissed his palm. I noticed his eyes were a bit darker but not to the point of being worried.

"Joanna I don't want to, okay I just.. don't want to." he pulled his hand away and pulled down the sleeve of his of course long sleeved shirt he always wore.

As I watched him do that I knew why he didn't want to swim. He would have to take off his shirt and pants, he told me he had scars everywhere and that was why he wore the long shirts, and the reason why he wouldn't swim. "I can't see them you know." I said quietly.

Jasper looked at me and nodded, "Yeah I know you can't but your body is so perfect and mine well, far from perfect."

"Bull shit!" I said, "I can't even see your scars yet you can see everything wrong with my body! You think I'm not self conscious?" he looked at me and I knew I was right. "You can feel that I am, yet I did it and you who are the epitome of sexy won't swim because of something I can't see?"

He looked at me then a smirk hit his lips, "Epitome of sexy?" my eyes widened, I didn't realize I said that.

My face was very hot now and I'm sure I had a blush from hell, "So?" I whispered before slowly sinking to the bottom of the pool. I was officially embarrassed more than I ever had been.

When I ran out of breath I was forced to come up to the surface. "Try to drown your self just to stay away from me?" I looked at Jasper who had a smile on his face."Would it really make you happy if I got in?" he asked looking at me.

Slowly I nodded and looked at him, "Yeah."

I watched him as he stood up and begun to unbutton his shirt slowly. I had to look away to stop myself from gawking like an idiot. I knew he saw me due to his quiet laughter that filled the room. I wished I could stand looking, he was obviously nice to look at. I herd him get in the water and turned around smiling. He wasn't smiling he was glaring at me but I could tell it was fake.

My eyes went to his chest, he looked even more muscular then he did last time I saw him. He was in the shallow part so I could see his stomach as well. I couldn't image anything making him seem less attractive, no matter how many scars he had he would still look hot as hell.

"You happy now?" he asked pulling me out of my thoughts.

A smile lit up my face as I nodded, "I'm very happy!" He chuckled and walked over to me. As he got closer the water became colder but the cold was welcome.

"I like making you happy." the water must have been deeper than I thought because as he said that he stopped walking and started swimming. Slowly he pulled me closer to him, his hands went up to my neck as he leaned in and kissed me gently. Slowly I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and kissed him back. I loved this, he was being gentile and sweet.

"I love you." I whispered as he pulled away from me. My arms were still wrapped around his shoulder and I could feel the scars on his body but it didn't bother me.

"You have no idea how much I love you." he was playing with my hair again. I giggled and he looked at me, "I love your reactions to things."

"You like playing with my hair." he nodded as I laughed putting my head on his shoulder. When he kissed my forehead it reminded me of my grandfather. "Oh you will never guess what happened at the hospital!" I shook his shoulders slightly and he laughed.

"Well then tell me!" the smile on his face was a peaceful one and even though his eyes were a bit darker he seemed at ease.

"My grandpa knows about you!" he raised an eyebrow, "He says he approves of you until you hurt me then all hell will break loose. That means I'm to tell Emmett." I smiled but bit my lip, I wasn't sure if he was going to like me talking about Emmett.

"Things are back to normal with Emmett and I." I hugged him again smiling. "plus if your grandfather says it then I guess i have to treat you right." he kissed my cheek.

"Oh I have another surprise!" I was sure my smile was huge at this point. "My dad says he doesn't care if I'm with you"

A smile that I was sure matched mine lit up his face. "Wow, just when you think things are as bad as they can get. Things get better." I knew he was talking about my moods.

"Yeah, I guess my grandfather was right." Jasper now had me close to him and I wasn't having to swim to stay up anymore.

"Dominic told me what he said, or really he told Emmett but I was listening to them." he moved my hair out of my face.

I nodded and smiled as I splashed him in the face with water. He looked at me and raised an eyebrow and threw me back slightly. When I reached the surface I was laughing, he was against the side of the pool looking out one of the windows. I looked at him, he had changed, I wondered if I had done something wrong.

"I wonder how long this will last." he said not looking at me. "Everything, you feeling like this, being able to be close to you, everything seems so good despite the bad things that are happening."

I swam over to him and wrapped my arms around his chest, "No matter what happens I will be here for you. No matter what Jasper. I'm yours forever or as long as you want me."

He smiled slightly and cupped my face, "Forever sounds nice." he smiled softly and put his head on my shoulder. He pressed his lips to my neck and stayed that way for a while.

"Forever is what it will be then." I whispered as he moved his lips form my neck taking a deep breath.

"I love swimming now." he muttered, I looked at him curiously. "It blocks some of the sent, that's why I'm able to be this close. Not all of it but quite a bit of it."

"That's good." I said smiling. Jasper laughed and swam down under the water and then came back up with a smile on his face. I laughed and ran my fingers through his think blond hair. "Your weird." I laughed.

He shook his head and water drops fell into my face, "Why ?" he asked looking at me smiling.

I liked this side of him, it was free. He was so different now I guess it was the fact that he couldn't smell my blood as bad as usual. This was so amazing, he was fun and acting very loving. "Because I'm not used to this!" I felt myself blush and he smiled at me, he moved closer to me. I felt my blush grow more intense.

"I'm not used to this either." he grabbed my face and kissed my forehead, "But I love it."

I smiled and he picked me up and spun me around, I wrapped my arms around his neck, "You know this wont last long." I whispered as he stopped spinning me.

When he put me down he laughed lightly, he slowly he pressed his lips to mine and I pulled him closer to me. He backed me up against the edge of the pool with his lips never leaving mine. I ran my hands over his broad shoulder and could once again feel the raised skin from the scars that covered his body. Once again he presed me as far as he could against the edge of the pool, I could feel his ice cold hands on my hips.

He moved his lips from mine and started to kiss along my neck. It was obvious that he was being more careful arouind my neck but I still loved it. I let a small moan escapse my lips and I heard him laugh lightly as he kissed up to my jaw. I felt him smile as he spoke. "I like that." I could feel my face turn red from embarrasment. He kissed my neck and the feeling in the pit of my stomach came back, with each kiss me sent jolts into the pit of my stomach and I loved it.

I bit the side of my jaw as he pulled away and looked at me "What?" I could see it in his eyes that he wasn't ready to stop. I wasn't sure what to do, he knew what I was feeling but he didn't know why. I wanted to kiss him like he did me but if I did and he moved away from me I could be hurt but If I asked then I would feel stupid. With a sigh I decided on what to do. "I want to try something." I whispered not looking at him.

"Just do it." his voice sounded slightly diffrent but I loved it. Slowly I put my arms back around his neck and kissed under his jaw lightly. Jasper froze up for a second then he pressed his body to mine. I smiled slightly, he wasn't regecting me and I loved kissing him. I flet him tilt his head back as I kissed up his jaw. I could feel his toned mucsles moving against my own body.

As I ran my fingers slowly down his stomach I smiled. His eyes were closed and he was holding me close to him. As I kissed up to his lips he laughed and kissed me back. "Well I like that to." he looked at me as I blushed, "What made you want to do that?" he asked with a smile on hid face.

"I wanted to make you feel the way I do when you kiss me." I answered in a quiet voice.

"I feel everyhting you you do Joanna." Jasper held me close to him but moved away from the walls. "Don't worry about whats happening out there what matters is in here."

I smiled running my fingers through his hair, "I kknow."

I smiled and kissed him lightly. "I've said this before and I will say it a thousand more times, I love you with all of my heart."

"I will never get tired of it." I said as he kissed me again.

No matter what was happening with anyone else in the world not my grandfather, my father, mother, my brother or anyone. Right now, at this moment in this room things were perfect. Well almost perfect.

**Well there it is! and I know you loved it or I hope you do! I updated before the week was up so I hope you are all happy. I need you guys to answer a question for me though. As you all guessed Joanna's grandpa will die, I want to know if you want to me to do a chapter about the funeral or not! **

**Okay guys you know what to do answer the question! Now if you want me to update then I guess you review!  
**


	25. Laughter is the best Medicine Edited

**Thank you all for the reviews from my last chapter! I love you all and due to what you said there will be no chapter about the funeral! I think thats a good thing because I didn't want to write it really but yeah it was up to you! Well we are in the last few chapters of this story, maybe three or four left! I'm excited because I have big things for my next part of this! Anyway this is just a filler like chapter but I like it, I hope you will to! Oh and if you love or even just kinda like Alec Volturi, (my new love) then check out my new story!  
**

**Shameless advertising- Okay I have been reading this awesome story about Jasper, it's called Heal Me by Jaspersluv. It is an amazing story!!  
**

That night when we returned to our rooms of course the girls were all laughing at me. Alice had as I thought seen what would happen and that was the reason she stopped the others from going with me. Though I didn't say it out loud and the fact that she was making fun of me, I thanked her. If it hadn't been for her I wouldn't be talking to Jasper. When I laid down I heard my phone go off on the night stand. With a groan I opened it and saw the text message Edward had sent me. _**"You're welcome"**_ I smiled, Edward had talked to Jasper just as he said he would.

I awoke by the sound of Rosalie's voice. I was trying to annoy her but when the bed I was so pleasantly sleeping on moved from under me. When I hit the floor I heard laughter all around me, I jumped up and looked at Rosalie who was holding the bed in her hands laughing with Alice and Bella.

"What the hell Rose!" I yelled stretching my sore body. I watched as they continued laughing at me, I rolled my eyes and glared at them.

Rosalie but the bed back in its proper place and looked at me, "Well I told you that if you didn't get up I would do that!" she smiled as I saw Alice high-five her as she walked by.

"I didn't hear you!" I grumbled as I walked over to the dresser and looked through it, "Why did I need to get up so early anyway?"

"We are going to your grandparents house today." I nodded and looked at Bella as she smiled slightly.

I nodded and took out my clothes for the day. Rosalie, Bella and Alice had all left by then. I sighed as I looked at my feet. I wasn't sure if I wanted to go to their house, I knew I didn't have any choice but it was still hard. It would be easier than it was before because Jasper would be with me. We had agreed to no more fighting, and I knew he would be there with me.

I looked at the clothes I had pulled out, my grandmother had gotten me the shirt I was going to wear today. Every character from The Nightmare before Christmas was on it with the pumpkin patch in the background. My skinny jeans were dark purple and they were just about my favorite pair as well as my grandmothers favorite color. I was going to do just as my grandfather said and go on. I thought about dressing as I did yesterday but I felt as if I wouldn't be listening to him.

After I had done my hair and makeup I looked in the mirror. The scars form Lucas were still on my face. You could see the scar on my lip and above my eye as well as the scar that was on my left cheek under my eye. I shook my head laughing, I knew my grandmother and some of my other relatives would point them out to me and I was going to of course hate it. Sometimes when I went out it felt like people were staring at them even though I knew they weren't.

My phone vibrated in my pocket and I pulled it out. When I saw who it was from I couldn't help but smile, Jasper. _**"Good morning my kitten."**_I giggled slightly as I read it. No matter how many times he called me what it was still giggle worthy.

"**Hello Jasper." **I sent back as I walked into the main room with the other girls. They were sitting on the couch watching a movie. I wasn't sure what it was but they all seemed pretty interested, he only thing I saw was a girl in a fat suit talking to a crowd of people. "What's this?" I asked sitting by Rosalie as she moved her legs so I could sit down.

"It's called Fat like me, it's really good." Alice piped up from her seat on the chair in the corner.

I nodded as my phone went off again, _**"What no nickname?"**_I rolled my eyes and Rosalie looked at me. "Phone." I smiled and bit my lip. **"What would you like me to call you?" **

"Who are you texting?" Bella asked me not looking away from the screen.

Rosalie laughed, "Isn't it obvious?" I looked over at her as she smirked, "She is texting her swimming buddy!" I pushed Rosalie slightly as they all laughed.

"You guys are jerks." I whispered as I looked at my phone again, _**"Well I would like to be called a lot of things, but what do you think?" **_I laughed and looked at the others who were still laughing. **"Well I think your stupid and your sisters are making fun of me." **I kicked Rosalie and stuck out my tongue, "I told on you!"

"Oh big bad Jasper I'm so scared!" Rosalie laughed and shook her head. Once again my phone went off and I thought it was Jasper but my mother was calling me. I put my fingers to my lips signaling them to be quiet.

"_Hello?"_ I asked trying not to laugh as Rosalie mimicked me.

"_We are going to leave soon, you need to go down stairs." _I nodded as she spoke.

"_Yes ma'am, be down their soon." _I said as I hung up.

"We need to go down to the lobby." I stood up as Alice turned off the tv and grabbed her purse. I grabbed my own and followed Rosalie out the door.

It was a lot louder now, they were having a breakfast thing and there were kids all over the place. Rosalie was looking over the edge smiling, I felt bad as I watched her. I knew how bad she wanted a kid and how she could never have one. She shook her head and got into the elevator with Alice, Bella and I.

"So how is Emmett going to be there?" Bella asked. "I mean isn't his picture going to be there?" I had told her about how he used to keep the picture in the china cabinet.

"No he had that picture with him at the hospital, the only others are in photo albums in the attic, I asked when I was little." I knew it hadn't changed, my grandfather always said it was to hard to look at those pictures.

"Oh that's good." Alice said as the elevator stopped and she almost jumped out. I rolled my eyes as some guy nudged the one next to him and not so subtly pointed to where we were. I recognized the one who's friend bumped him to be the guy from yesterday in the elevator but I forgot his name.

"Pathetic." I laughed as Rosalie glared at the guys and walked past them. I saw Rosalie's glare falter and a smile replaced it. I saw her walk over to a group of guys and hug the biggest one there, I knew them instantly.

"My Rose." Emmett pulled her to him and looked at me. Our eyes locked for a moment and I knew he was apologizing to me for the other day. I smiled slightly and shook my head, he didn't need to be sorry for anything.

I followed the others over to the guys and jumped when someone stood beside me. "Sorry Joanna." I looked up at Jasper smiling. "Are you okay with today?" he asked.

"You know that I'm not." I muttered as he grabbed my hand and pulled me to him.

"Just stay calm, I don't think your mother can handle anymore drama than she already has." he looked down at me and bit his lip.

"What's wrong with her?" I asked loudly. "She was fine yesterday." he ran his fingers down my face and shushed me.

Jasper looked at me then looked away, I was sure he didn't want to tell me what he was about to say. "Well, nothing is wrong with her exactly but I heard her and Carlisle talking about putting you on anti- depressants. Just because you haven't been talking and you know just in case."

I let out a harsh laugh, "Of course they think I'm crazy!" I was angry now, I didn't need anti-depressants.

Jasper rolled his eyes and kissed my hand, "They don't think your crazy Joanna." he took a deep breath and looked like he was smelling me. I pulled my hand away, not that I thought he was going to bite me but he looked funny. "Just stay calm and act sort of like your self, talking is a good thing to do."

I nodded slowly and he looked at my hand, of course I hurt his feelings. "I didn't think you would bite me Jasper, you just looked funny smelling me." I put my head on his chest and felt his chest shake.

He pulled me over to the others and I was pulled away from Jasper by Emmett who hugged me. "I'm sorry Jojo." the exchange we had earlier was enough for him so now he was just messing around. I could tell he was trying to keep himself happy, I had a feeling it was all for Rosalie. It was obvious that it was hard for her to see him how he was before and he hated making her unhappy.

"Its okay Emmett now put me down." he put me down and I practically ran under Jasper's arm. Jasper put his arm around me and smiled as I wrapped my small arms around his waist.

I looked over and saw Alice and Dominic talking to each other as he ate an apple. Edward and Bella were standing with us and Edward was just watching the people around, mostly a little girl who was sitting alone, I could tell he was trying not to laugh, I was wondering what she was thinking. Rosalie was looking at Emmett rolling her eyes as he patted her head.

"You know Jasper was almost bouncing up and down yesterday." Edward said looking at Jasper smirking slightly. I looked at him curiously then looked up at Jasper who was glaring at his brother.

"Why?" I asked smiling at him as he growled quietly at a smiling Edward. Emmett was nodding and Rosalie was looking at him.

"Nothing really important." he said through gritted teeth. Edward and Emmett laughed and smirked at him

"Don't let him lie, he was so excited that dad approved of him. He was like a little girl." Dominic came over to us with Alice and smiled at Jasper.

I saw Dominic stiffen when Jasper glared at him, "This isn't over kid." His voice was meant to scare Dominic and it worked quite well.

"What do…" Dominic started as we saw my parents and Carlisle and Esme come into the lobby. Jasper put his arm around Dominic and smiled at him, the look on Dominic's face was priceless. _"Help" _he mouthed to me as I laughed and walked up to my dad hugging him.

"hey daddy." I said as he hugged me back. "We leaving now?" I asked as we walked over to the others.

"Yeah, you guys just need to follow us." my dad told Carlisle and Esme as we left the hotel.

I walked over to Emmett who was watching the others walk away. "You might not want to go." I whispered as he looked over at me.

"Why wouldn't I want to go?" his voice was a little harsh but I couldn't blame him. He was going to see his family, his sister in law.

I looked at him and looked down, "My grandparents live in the same house they have all their lives."

Emmett let out a harsh laugh and ran his hand through his hair. "Oh of course." he shook his head. "So not only am I seeing the family I never new but now do I have to go back to my old house!"

I looked away from him, it was no where near my fault but I still felt really bad about it. "I'm sorry Emmett." I whispered as we walked out to the cars.

He laughed and put his arm around me, "Why are you sorry, you didn't do anything so don't worry about it!" I nodded and got into the car with my parents and Dominic.

The ride up to my grandparents was all to familiar, I had been up that way so many times it wasn't funny. I knew Emmett knew the way because when I looked back I saw him pointing to the way where the house was. It surprised me that he remembered but it was probibly a bitter sweet one. He more than likely didn't want to remember the way but he did. I felt my phone vibrate and knew it was more than likely Jasper, but I didn't want to answer. I would go over to him when we got to the house.

When we pulled up I saw the cars lined up on the rode along the side of the lawn. When the car stopped I got out and looked at the house. It was almost the same as I had remembered it from when I was little. The yellow paint was fading off the two story house. The beams in the front looked older and the windows looked a little dirty.

I sighed and looked over at my brother who was looking up at it as I did. I grabbed his hand and he looked at me. I could see the tears in his eyes for just about the first time since we found out. This place was full of so many good memories now the memory of this house would be bad.

I heard the Cullen's pull up and I looked over at them, Rosalie was holding tightly onto Emmett's hand as everyone looked at him. I didn't care that Jasper was paying attention to Emmett right now, he needed help more than I did. I started to walk up to the house slowly, I was counting the steps in my head.

"Joanna?" I heard a guys voice ask. I looked up at the voice. The guy had a long face, curly brown hair and the bluest eyes in the world. "Spencer?" I asked with a smile.

"Hey!" he laughed slightly as he hugged me, "I didn't recognize you!" I nodded, he had always been my favorite cousin.

"Yeah I do look kinda different." I laughed nervously as he nodded. He looked different, his clothes were obviously a little punk mixed with prep.

He laughed, "Understatement." he pushed my bangs to the side. "You went from cowgirl to scene girl!" I laughed. I was surprised when he called me scene not punk or goth. "Um tall blond guy over there is glaring at me." he chuckled and I looked over at Jasper and rolled my eyes waving him over here.

Slowly he walked over to us and put his arm around me pulling me to him. "You need something?" he asked looking at Spencer.

I laughed and shook my head, "I wanted to introduce you to my cousin Spencer." His grip relaxed a bit and I knew Spencer noticed.

"Spencer McCarty, and I take it your Jo's boyfriend?" he asked smirking at me as he stuck his hand out for Jasper to shake.

"Yes, I'm Jasper Hale." he shook Spencer's hand and nodded. Jasper didn't let go of my hand as he shook hands with Spencer.

"Spencer!" I heard a little girl yell from somewhere. "Oh I got to go, catch up with you later Jo!" I nodded as Spencer ran towards the voice.

"Why didn't you look at your text?" I knew Jasper had sent it. I smiled at him and shrugged, "I was trying to talk to you."

"I know." I said looking at him, "I just knew I would see you within minutes so I didn't need to. I was planning on walking straight to you."

"Why didn't you?" he asked curiously.

"Well Emmett needed you more than I did so I didn't want to bother you." I shrugged as I looked over at Emmett, he was looking at the house with Rose.

Jasper shook his head and laughed slightly, "I'm never to busy for you my Joanna." he grabbed my face and put his forehead on mine, "You need to get that, you are my main priority!" He looked around for a moment then quickly kissed me.

No matter how fast the kiss was, it still made my head spin. I knew he had looked around to see if anyone in my family was watching, mostly my father. I let out a breath that I didn't know I was holding. He laughed slightly and watched me, "I figured out what your nickname is." I whispered.

Jasper put his arm around me smiling, "What did you decide?" He was smiling, I knew he was trying not to laugh from my emotions after he kissed me.

I smiled and put my hands on his face, "Superman!" I laughed and nodded.

"Superman?" he scoffed and I looked at the ground, of course he didn't like it. "I think I'm a little better than Superman don't you?"

I smiled and relief went through me, "Yes, you're my Superman, which makes you win."

He nodded laughing, "Okay I can live with Superman if it makes you happy." he grabbed my hand

I nodded, "It does." I smiled as he looked down at me and hugged me. I welcomed the chill of his body as I held onto him. The fighting we had been doing in the last month was pointless, I could never live with out this and if we were fighting I couldn't hold him or talk to him.

"Hey let's go inside." I looked over at Dominic and nodded pulling out of Jasper's arms. He didn't let go of my hand though.

"I didn't forget, I'm still getting you back." I heard Jasper whisper to Dominic as Alice giggled from his side.

My parents were inside with Carlisle and Esme as we walked in the house, "Where is Emmett?" I whispered to no one in particular.

"He wasn't ready to come in, Rosalie and him are going to go look around. They are going back to where Rose found him." I nodded at Edward who was standing behind me. I felt bad for him, but he had Rosalie there.

The house was packed , I could see aunt Cecilia and her husband, she was holding a little girl and she was reaching out for Spencer and John who was standing next to him. I couldn't seethe twins Ben and Allan anywhere but I was sure they were here.

John was dressed the same as he used to, he was a cowboy. I don't think that would ever change, he loved the style and he lived the life. He was always the one most into the work and ranch care. He looked almost like Spencer but his face was rounder than his older brothers.

I watched as two boys walked up to aunt Cecilia and Uncle Tim and recognized them as Ben and Allan. They were identical twins, they both had dirty blond hair, grey blue eyes and were the same height. All four or five, counting the little girl that looked exactly like my aunt curly brown hair, and hazel eyes. They were all my aunts, Spencer was the only one who wasn't uncle Tim's kid but he had been there since Spencer was three so he was good enough his.

I saw my dad talking to uncle Gregory, I looked at Aunt Cecilia and laughed slightly. They all looked almost exactly the same. It was funny all curly brown hair, hazel eyes and same nose and eye shape. Actually looking around all of us sort of looked alike just about all of had curly hair that was a dark color, uncle Tim had given Allan and Ben the dirty blond color, but they still looked like there mom.

When my grandmother came in the room my dad walked over to her and helped her walk. She was a tiny woman, yet so loud and so strong. It was getting harder for her to walk now but she still looked strong. Her hair was gray and curled at the ends. Her eyes looked almost black, her eyes were always dark.

I felt Jasper hold my hand tighter and I looked up at him curiously. He was looking at someone in the corner, I followed his eyes and rolled my eyes when I saw what he was looking at. Bridget was glaring at me. She was tall, blond hair, blue eyes, thin, tan, and dressed in Holister. She fit the exact stereotype I hated… or she was the stereotype.

I looked away from her and felt Jasper send calming waves through me as I looked at Dominic and saw him roll his eyes looking at the exact same person. There was a time that I thought Bridget was mean to me but she was nice to me compared to how she treated Dominic. In her mind since he didn't like to get dirty and play sports he was gay. She constantly teased him, her favorite thing to do was make fun of him, she would tell the other little boys he was gay and had crushes on all of them, I really felt sorry for him.

"I want to go say hi to my grandma." I looked up at Jasper, "Do you want to come with me?" He was still holding my hand and he had to let me go if I was going to leave.

"Yeah let's go." he wasn't focusing on me or anything near him right now. He was looking out a window, I knew he was feeling Emmett's emotions.

"Is he okay?" I asked quietly. I looked out the window and bit my lip. I wasn't sure if it was a good idea to bring him here. I know he really wanted to, but I wasn't sure if he was able to really handle it.

"Yeah, he is just really upset right now. I worry about him, he is usually so happy." He closed his eyes and looked down at me. I put my head on his arm and sighed, "I'm fine though, so lets go."

I moved off of his arm and pulled him with me to where my grandmother was alone. When I got close to her she smiled and pulled me into a hug. "Oh my goodness Joanna you have gotten so much older! Not bigger of course your still about the same height as you were at twelve." I looked at her, yeah point out my height. I heard Jasper fail to hold in a laugh behind me and I turned and glared at him.

"Nice to see you to grandma." I muttered as she let go of me. Jasper was coughing but I knew he was only trying to stop the laughter.

"Of course dear, so who is this?" She looked at Jasper and he stopped laughing and stood up straight.

"Grandma this is Jasper and Jasper this is my grandmother." I looked at my grandmother who smiled at me and patted my hand.

"Hello ma'am." he stuck his hand out and she shook his hand. I smiled, she loved him already, I was sure she knew who he was to me so that might have been the reason, or the fact that he is just so loveable.

"So your not going to introduce you're self as her boyfriend?" she smiled and I put my face in my hands. She loved to embarrass me… "Oh I saw you holding hands and I saw that kiss outside." Jasper's eyes widened, I knew he didn't think anyone saw the kiss and I didn't ether. "When you looked around you didn't look at the house."

"Oh god." I whispered and my grandmother hugged me laughing.

"Well I guess I should be more observant next time." he laughed at himself and looked at me.

"What's wrong pumpkin?" I glared at Jasper as he smirked. "If you didn't want me to know he was your boyfriend then you should be at least an inch apart." I groaned and Jasper smiled, he was enjoying my mood. "But I don't see why you wouldn't want everyone to know, he is quite a catch." she winked and smiled.

I rolled my eyes and nodded, "I don't care who knows grandma." I looked away. Jasper was standing behind me and I felt him pat my back.

"I know I'm embarrassing you, I'm sorry sweetheart." she kissed my cheek and smiled, "I love you princess but I think your father and his brother are going to start a search party if I'm not outside with them soon." I laughed as she walked outside.

"She is hurting more than she is telling anyone." Jasper whispered as I put my head against his chest.

"Yeah I know, she always acts overly happy when she is upset." I muttered. I hated it, if you saw her you would think nothing is wrong with her but in reality so is hurting. All she is doing is holding in the pain.

Jasper laughed slightly and held me to him, "You shouldn't hate it." he looked down at me. "She doesn't do it to hold things in, she does it because there is really no point living your life being upset."

I nodded, "So she really is trying to be happy?" I turned to face him and he nodded.

"Yeah, your grandfather made her promise to be happy. I herd her say that when she was walking away." He smiled down at me and moved my hair out of my face. "What?" I asked as he smiled slightly.

"You're beautiful, I hate it when you hide your face." he pressed his lips to my forehead.

I smiled as he moved played with the ends of my hair, "Well it looks good when it's in my face." I moved it back to where it had been and he sighed.

"Aw come on kitten leave it there." he moved it over again and grabbed my hands holding them at my side.

"Aw no superman I like it there." I smirked and shook my head making my hair go in my face again.

He laughed slightly and let go of my hands, "I'm really superman?" he asked looking at me.

I smirked , "Yes you are, I like it." he sighed and shook his head. He didn't seem to like it, I looked down, "If you don't like it I won't call you that."

He looked at me curiously for a moment then he shook his head laughing slightly, "No, I sighed because you put your hair back in your face." I smiled, "I like the name, don't worry about that."

"Okay, I was just checking." I smiled and he rolled his eyes and looked behind me. "What?"

"I don't like your blond cousin." his tone was flat, I looked to where he was and saw Bridget, of course, making fun of Dominic.

I made a growling type noise and moved away from Jasper walking over to them. When I got closer I could hear what she was saying. "Oh what is this your boyfriend Dominic?" she looked at Edward who was glaring at her. Alice was also glaring from Dominic's side.

"Will you leave him alone!" I snapped stepping in between Dominic and Bridget. "Were here for grandpa not to fight so leave him alone."

She laughed and looked down at me, "If you're not here to fight freak then why are you standing there."

"Because if you don't leave him alone I am going to fight." She was angry right now, I could tell, she never liked people standing up to her.

"I could beat you up when we were kids and I can do it now." she pushed me slightly.

I laughed and shook my head, "You must have a bad memory because every time we got into a fight I would pummel you!" I was angry now.

"Joanna come on." Jasper said sternly putting his hand on my shoulder. I didn't look away from Bridget, I would rather be with Lulu now.

"Who is this?" Bridget looked at him and then to me.

"I'm her boyfriend." he said harshly as he pulled me away from her. The others quickly followed us outside.

As he pulled me into the backyard his grip on my arm was extremely tight, "Jasper let go of me that hurts."

Quickly he let go of me and looked at my arm, "Did I break anything?" he asked worried.

I shook my head and looked at my arm, "No but it might bruise." I rubbed my arm flinching a bit.

"I'm so sorry, I just couldn't let you get in a fight." he looked away and I grabbed his hand.

"Don't worry about it." I kissed his palm and smiled at him. I looked at Dominic who was holding Alice's shoulders as she glared at the house.

"Calm down Alice." Edward said laughing as she turned and glared at him. I looked at Jasper and then back to Alice. Just by the look on her face I could tell that being on her bad side wasn't something I wanted to do.

"Oh shut up." she muttered as Bella laughed hugging her best friend.

"Let's go find Emmett and Rosalie, they are okay now." Bella grabbed Edward's hand as he spoke.

Dominic nodded and looked around, "Hey mom we are going to go look around!" He yelled as she turned around and looked at us.

"Don't go to far!" she yelled back and we all walked into the forest.

I loved walking through the forest like this, I was never allowed to really into it before now. Jasper kept by me the whole time, ether holding me or just close to me. I wasn't sure why he did it but I did like it. The whole time we were laughing and making jokes, things were so free, Edward and Jasper would jump at each other and pretend to fight. It was entertaining to watch. We passed a little lake where I stopped and threw a rock into it before we took off again.

When we got to a small clearing I saw Emmett and Rosalie walking towards us hand in hand. I smiled as Emmett waved and grinned showing all of his teeth. Rosalie smiled at him and they were next to us in the blink of an eye.

"Why did you guys come out here, we were headed back to the house." Emmett said looking at mostly Edward and Jasper.

"We got bored so we came out here." Jasper said shrugging. Dominic nodded and patted Alice's head.

Emmett grinned and punched Jasper pushing him back a bit, I quickly moved away and joined Rosalie. "If you're so bored then why don't you fight me." he smirked and grinned at me. "That is if you can handle being away from your kitten for a while." I blushed and looked wide eyed at them.

"Shut up." Jasper pushed Emmett almost knocking him back. I knew it was playful but at the moment I could careless if Jasper was trying to hurt him.

Emmett laughed and pulled Jasper into a head lock, "Oh come on superman you can do it." Bella yelled from Edwards side and I put my face in my hands. How did they know about that!

Jasper got out of Emmett's head lock and pinned him to the ground. "You can blame Dominic for us knowing that." Emmett smirked at Dominic as Jasper stood up and looked at him.

"Well Alice had a vision and told me and well I said it would loud," he looked down. Jasper said he was going to get him back for earlier so this was mine.

"You dumb ass!" I yelled walking over to him and pulling his hair. He pulled away from me and I pushed him and grabbed his arm twisting it behind his back. "Keep things to your self!" I yelled at him.

"Okay okay I will just let go!" He tried to move but that only hurt worse. "Please." I heard the others laugh and I let go of him.

"Oh yeah that's my niece!" Emmett yelled hugging me. I laughed as he put me down, Rosalie rolled her eyes at her husband and we started back to the house.

"I love you." Jasper said putting his arm around my shoulders and kissing my head.

I laughed and put my head on his chest, "I love you too." He smiled at me and looked over at Dominic. I wasn't sure what was going on, but Jasper stopped walking and motioned for me to go on. I nodded confuse and walked ahead, Alice giggled and walked over to me smiling. "Watch this." she whispered to me as we looked back.

Dominic pulled out his phone and looked at it curiously, "Jasper why would I need a towel?" he asked turning to face Jasper. Before I really knew what happened Jasper had pushed Dominic into the lake and was laughing loudly.

Everyone stopped and was looking at Dominic as Jasper stood on the edge laughing. I ran over to Jasper and hugged him, "I told you I would get you back." Jasper smirked as Alice walked over to the lake and helped Dominic out. As Dominic walked by him he mumbled something while glaring at him. I wasn't able to hear what he said but the others did.

"What did he say?" I asked Jasper who smiled down at me, he shrugged and pulled me to his side kissing the top of my head.

**Well there it was! Remember if you want my next update soon then you better review!! So do it now!!! XD **


	26. Emmett and Jesse McCarty

**I have had MAJOR writers block for this story, I am so so sorry about not updating sooner! I will start updating it more because the end is coming extremely soon and I want to get this one over to start on the sequel. I hope you guys can forgive me for not updating sooner! I also hope you all like this chapter, it's sad but it's needed! **

That night Jasper forced me to go to sleep at ten. He had tried to get me to sleep at nine but I was not going to do that and I had a feeling that he knew this. He had stopped asking me after only three times, it may seem like a lot but with Jasper it was a quick defeat for him. My parents had a rule that at ten it was lights out and the boys were in their room and girls were in their room. I didn't want him to leave when he did, when he stayed with me I slept better and I felt better but if my father would have ever found out then we would both be in trouble.

I fell asleep shortly after he left, once again I was pulled into a dream that I didn't want to have. I was in pain, and nothing was around me but darkness. I couldn't see anything, or hear anything, my only since was pain. I couldn't scream I couldn't make any noise, I tried to but I couldn't. I had never felt this type of pain before. It went from the tips of my fingers down to the tips of my toes. The pain was burning, it felt as if a fire had been started deep with in my body and was spreading outwards. At the sound of a voice I knew that I was in Jasper's memories.

"Joanna wake up." I opened my eyes slowly and saw Rosalie sitting on my bed next to me. I stretched and stood up slowly thankful for a moment that the pain I felt wasn't mine. "Have a good night?" she asked as I made a groaning sound. "Sorry for waking you up but Jasper asked me to wake you up."

"What do I not get to control my sleeping habits?" I grabbed my clothes for the day out of the dresser

Bella laughed walking into the room, "You are dating a vampire, you have no freedom."

I laughed slightly and nodded, "Yeah." it was slightly true, when Jasper wanted me awake then he would just wake me up and when he wanted me to sleep he would make me fall a sleep. I didn't exactly mind it, this morning I did because I was tired… maybe I should have gone to sleep when he wanted me to…

I got dressed quickly, I didn't realize that I was wearing a superman shirt and matching skinny jeans until I got out of the bathroom. "Wearing that for Jasper?" Alice asked giggling.

I looked down at my shirt and glared at her, "No I didn't even know I was wearing it." I said defensively.

They all laughed, "Sure Joanna." Bella said patting my shoulder as I walked past her and grabbed my phone off the desk. I opened it and saw Jasper had texted me, I knew before I opened it that he told me good morning. I smiled lightly when I saw that I was right.

"Hey babe." I jumped slightly at the sound of Emmett's loud voice as he came though the door and grabbed Rosalie. Leaning against the wall I watched him kiss all over her face and watched Edward roll his eyes as he walked into the room.

"Good morning Joanna." Edward smiled as Bella walked over to him and he embraced her. I nodded watching Alice skip over to the door, "You too." he nodded and held Bella's hand.

I looked over at the door, my face fell when Jasper didn't come in. "He went to hunt a dew hours ago with Esme and Carlisle. They should be back in a few minutes."

Emmett came into the main room and ruffled my hair, "Don't worry kid, Blondie will be back." he smirked and when Rosalie smacked his arm he looked at her and shrugged.

Rolling my eyes I sat down on the couch. Dominic sat next to me and put his legs on my lap with a smirk. "Move your feet." I pushed his feet off of me but he moved them right back on my lap laughing. "Dominic this isn't funny!" I pushed his legs off again and he sighed leaving them down.

"I thought it was funny." he muttered as Alice giggled sitting in his lap.

Alice kissed the tip of his nose, "You are so annoying sometimes." he shrugged and laughed.

Rolling my eyes I stood up and walked towards the balcony outside. "Where are you going?" Rosalie asked looking at me with an obviously concerned look on her face.

I laughed slightly, "I'm just going to the balcony, no big deal." she nodded as I stepped outside.

The warm air hit my as soon as I stepped outside. The ends of my hair where the hair spray hadn't set in completely blew around my face. I leaned against the rail and looked at the hospital which my grandpa was staying in. My parents had picked this hotel because it was close to the hospital, but I hated actually seeing it. I didn't want to cry but I couldn't stop the few tears that escaped my eyes. I wiped my eyes and shook my heard trying to stop more of the tears from escaping.

"You know it is okay to cry." I looked over at Dominic who had come out onto the balcony with me. "I know what grandma said but sometimes you just have to cry." he stood next to me and looked at the hospital.

I leaned on his shoulder, "I know it's okay I'm just tired of crying." he laughed and put his arm around me. I smiled, it had been a while since it was just me and Dom, I loved everyone else and God knows I was thankful for them but sometimes I missed just talking to Dominic.

"Crying is never fun Joanna, but you have to do it sometimes to feel better." he smiled slightly and I looked up and him. "What?" he asked.

I laughed and rolled my eyes, "That was way to deep for you." he sharply turned his head, "You stole that from Alice didn't you." I smirked at him.

Dominic sighed, "Yeah, but it's true so it doesn't matter where it came from." we both started laughing and I hugged him. "When do you think we will go again?" Dominic asked as our laughter died down.

I looked at him and then back at the hospital, I shrugged. "Probably today, we didn't see him yesterday." I said quietly. I turned my head as I heard a crash and then Emmett yelling he would pay for what ever it was that I assume he broke. I pulled my eyebrows together, "Do you think Emmett should get to see him?" I asked quietly. I knew it was a stupid idea, if grandpa saw him and recognized him then things would be bad, but this was Emmett's brother, the last of his family that he knew as a human.

"Yeah he should, be you know he can't, there is to much of a chance that grandpa will recognize him." I noticed the tone in his voice. He felt the same as I did, it wasn't right to keep him away from his brother…but the risk of getting caught was to much.

I heard the balcony door open and Edward came through. I bit my lip, he was probably mad that we were thinking that. "I'm not mad, but it would be up to Emmett if he wants to see him. Carlisle and Esme asked him if he wanted to see him." my eyes widened, they were really going to let him? "He hasn't decided if he will or not."

I pulled my eyebrows together, "Why hasn't he answered?" If I were him I know I would want to.

Edward chuckled slightly, "He isn't sure if he can handle it." I nodded and looked at him, that made since. Suddenly Edward rolled his eyes, "Make sure you won't be seen if you do it." he said a little louder than before. Both Dominic and I looked at him curiously, he looked past us though.

I turned around as I heard light foot steps on the balcony. My eyes widened as Jasper stood on top of the rail smiling. "I wasn't seen by anyone." Jasper smirked at Edward and stepped off the rail and stood next to me.

"You better not have." Edward muttered walking back inside with Dominic following him.

Jasper grabbed my hand as he leaned against the balcony, "Hey." he said with a small smile on his face. I looked at him and smiled slightly, "You're sad, you don't need to act."

I sighed and leaned against the rail next to him, "You know I hate that you can feel my emotions sometimes." I muttered as he laughed slightly, "It would be okay if it was only when you were with me but no it's all the damn time."

Jasper pulled his eyebrows together and looked at me, "Does it really bother you that much?" he asked quietly not looking at me.

I know what I said sounded mean but I didn't want it to be mean, I didn't say it to make him feel bad. "No Jasper, I said it's annoying sometimes. But I'm sure it gets annoying feeling everyone's emotions." I smiled and focused on making him feel my love, "I didn't mean it in a bad way, I swear." I stood in front of him and smiled.

He sighed and placed his hand on my cheek, "I love you Joanna." he muttered leaning down and placing a small kiss on my lips. "Let's go inside." he muttered as he pulled away.

Slowly I followed him into the room where Emmett playing with the broken pieces of a lamp. I looked at him curiously, "It fell, and I said I would pay for it."

I laughed and shook my head, "Of course Emmett." He laughed slightly. There was a knock on the door and before I even had time to turn my head Alice was at the door letting Carlisle and Esme in.

"Your parents want to leave soon." Carlisle said to Dominic and I. Nodding I let out a sigh and rested my head on Jasper's back. "We need to know if you want to go Emmett."

I turned my head and looked over at Emmett, Rosalie had her hand on Emmett's shoulder and he was looking at her. "I'll go." he muttered as Rosalie wrapped her arms around him. "He is my brother, and I need to do this."

"Are you sure?" Esme asked looking at him with a sad look on her face. "If you can't handle this then you don't need to do it."

Emmett shook his head, "No, I can do this and I need to." Rosalie grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the room.

I watched as everyone started to leave, "Do you think he can do it?" I looking at the spot Emmett had just been.

Jasper looked down at me and sighed, "I will have to be near him, Carlisle and Esme told me that if he decides to go I will have to. Do you think your parents will mind?"

I shrugged, "I really don't know." it was a good question, I had no idea if my parents would let them see him. "They probably will, my grandpa knows we don't have many friends and just tell him that we do and he will want to meet you." I laughed at how sad that sounded, oh yeah my grandpa would want to meet them because we were losers and had no friends.

"Oh stop whining and let's go." I smiled slightly as Jasper pulled me down stairs with the others.

When we arrived at the hospital my parents went to see him alone. I sat in the waiting room with Jasper sitting next to me holding my hand. Alice, Dominic, Edward and Bella were sitting next to us with Edward and Alice playing games on her iPhone. I think it was chess but I wasn't really sure. I looked over at Emmett and Rosalie, I knew Emmett said that was able to do this but I wasn't sure. I looked over at Edward, he shook his head as he flashed his eyes to me. I nodded, Edward let me know I was right, Emmett wasn't ready.

I doubted anything could change his mind though, he was extremely stubborn. It seemed anyone born with the McCarty last name was stubborn, both my brother and I, my dad, my grandpa, Emmett, and I was sure my great grandparents were stubborn as well. I smiled slightly, Rosalie fit in with Emmett's family so well, I doubted that she had any idea how well she really did.

"Are you okay?" Jasper asked quietly despite the fact that everyone except Dominic and the other humans in the room could hear him.

I nodded letting out a deep sigh, "Yeah, just thinking." I muttered resting my head on his shoulder. "Being here makes me physically sick, I think the only hospital I can go to with out getting sick is the one at home."

He laughed and kissed the top of my head, "It's okay, you want me to calm your nerves?"

I pouted and nodded, "Yes please." I leaned my head on his shoulder and slouched down as Jasper sent calming waved through my body. "Thank you."

I heard my mother and fathers voices coming down the hall. I sat up and looked over at Emmett quickly before looking back at my parents who had just came in. "You guys can go in, he says he want to meet the twins friends." my mother smiled slightly and opened the door for us to go in.

Jasper and I stood up and waited for Emmett and Rosalie to go in. I looked at Emmett out of the corner of my eye and saw him looking down. I bit my lip, was this really a good idea, what would happen if grandpa recognized him then I wasn't sure what we would do. Jasper held my hand tightly as I bit my lip, he rubbed circles on the back of my hand to try and calm me down with out using his powers.

Taking a deep breath I pushed the door open and walked inside with Jasper following after me. Alice and Dominic came in next and Emmett and Rosalie came in last and stayed in the back away from everyone. I looked at my grandpa, a smile came to his face as he did his best to sit up. As he smiled at us I could clearly see how much Emmett and his brother looked, even with my grandpa looking old.

"Well, who are these fine people?" I smiled as his eyes sparkled as he looked at the Cullen's.

Dominic was the one who spoke first, "Granddad, this is Alice Cullen." Alice stepped foreword and stuck her hand out to him.

He shook her hand and smiled, "My god Dominic she is just as beautiful as you said!" Alice laughed as my grandfather hugged her. "It's good to meet you, I hate that we have to meet like this."

She nodded, "Better to meet you like this than not at all, Dominic has told me so much about you." she stepped back from him.

My grandpa smiled and looked over at Jasper, "This has to be the Jasper I have heard so much about."

A small smile came to Jasper's face as he stood up straight and shook my grandfathers hand, "Jasper Hale, pleasure to meet you sir." he did the same half-bow he does all the time.

My grandfather nodded, "Well I'm glad I talk some since into that stupid son of mine, you are a nice young man." I fought back a smile, young would never be a word I used for Jasper.

"I am glad as well." Jasper said grabbing my hand as he took his place back at my side.

Edward and Bella introduced themselves next, I looked back at Emmett. He slowly walked foreword with his head down the whole time. "Emmett Cullen." he said quietly but still loud enough to be heard by everyone.

My grandpa nodded and smiled slightly, "Nice to meet you Emmett, my older brother had the same name as you."

"What a coincidence." I was sure my grandpa didn't hear him, I was just surprised I heard him. He slowly walked back to the corner still keeping his head down.

Rosalie smiled at him sadly and walked over to him, "I'm Rosalie Hale, Jasper's twin. It's really nice to meet you." She shook his hand.

He laughed a wheezy laugh, "Well you are a beauty aren't you!" he laughed again. Suddenly the laughter turned into a deep rough cough and he fell back on the bed gasping for air and coughing horribly. His whole body shook with each cough.

I grabbed Jasper's hand tighter as I watched him, he stopped coughing for a moment but soon after he went into another coughing fit. "Jesse!" I gasped as Emmett was by his brothers bed in an instant.

My grandfathers eyes widened as he looked into Emmett's pain filled face. I looked at the others who all seemed unsure of that to do. "You… your dead." my grandpa choked out looking at Emmett. Rosalie placed her hand on Emmett's shoulder. She tried to pull him away but my grandfather grabbed his arm and Emmett stood still. "How… you look just like him. Everything, except the color of your eyes."

He ran a large hand through his thick curly hair, he looked around at the others, Edward stepped foreword shaking his head. "He is my brother Edward!" Emmett looked at Edward with pleading eyes. He looked broken, I was sure that if he could have been crying he would have. "Please, let me do this." he was shaking now. Rosalie stood back silent for once, she didn't look at Emmett, I doubted she could, I was crying just looking at him.

Jasper left my side and was in front of Emmett, "Absolutely not Emmett, you know you can't do this." I looked at Jasper with my mouth agape, why was he stopping this?

Rosalie stepped foreword but Alice pushed her back lightly and grabbed Jasper and Edward by the arms. "Let him do it. It's okay." Rosalie quickly grabbed Emmett's hand as he turned back to my grandfather who now had tears in his eyes.

He walked over to the bed and let out a deep shaking sigh, "It's me Jess, Emmett." My grandfather shook his head feverishly. "Yes it is, remember when you were seven and we got our first dog?" My grandpa's eyes got big. "You wanted to name it after you and mom said no, but even after that we all still called him Jesse with out mom knowing? That's when we started calling you Jess, because if we called you Jesse the dog would come." My grandpa was sobbing now, "Remember when Runt wanted to try out for football and the coach turned him away with just one look? What did I do?"

Tears were streaming down my face as Jasper pulled me closer to him. I had never seen my grandpa cry anytime before this day and it was hurting me. Nodding grandpa looked at Emmett with a smile, "You beat up the coach and made them give Runt a try, and he made it." Emmett nodded, "You're here, you're really here, how?'

"I can't tell you that, but I'm here and I'm not going anywhere for a long time." He reached out and hugged Emmett tightly. "I'm sorry I left, I'm so sorry Jesse." Emmett's broken voice and tearless sobs echoed in the room.

I looked up at Jasper who was had a look of discomfort on his face. I knew what it was from, I had never been this sad in my life and I was sure most of the others were feeling the same. The emotion in this room was nothing but sadness and I could tell it was effecting him. I hugged him and slowly reached up and placed my hand over his still heart. I tried to calm my tears before turning back to them.

"But you're here." he smiled, "I missed you, we all missed you Emmett." He cried out.

"I know you did, you have no idea how sorry I am." My grandpa looked at Rosalie who was still next to Emmett. Emmett's looked at Rose and then to grandpa, "Jesse, I want you to meet Rosalie, my wife."

Rosalie smiled at him, "I always knew you would end up with someone this beautiful." Emmett laughed and nodded. My grandpa let out an airy laugh and looked over at Dominic and I, "They know who you are?"

I nodded, "Yeah they know me, your son doesn't but my god he looks like you." Both Emmett and my grandfather laughed.

"I've always told Joanna she looks like you, Dominic has a few of the features but not as many as Jo." Emmett nodded and turned to me laughing. Another coughing fit took him again as the wheezy coughs shook his frame. "I love you Emmett, you take care of them." Emmett nodded as grandpa fell back again.

"I love you too Jesse." he grabbed his brothers hand still leaning at the bed.

Alice opened the door, "We need to go." Alice muttered stepping out of the room. I watched the others leave the room one by one. I stood there looking at my grandpa, he was weak, I knew he wasn't going to be here much longer.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up to see Emmett, "Let's go Joanna." he muttered wrapping his arm around my shoulder as he walked out if the room.

**So what did you think? Did the end make you cry? I cried writing it but hey that's just me! I hope you guys all liked this and please review!**


	27. Authors Note Possible new chapter?

**So... I haven't written this story in a REALLY long time I know. I looked back at this account and decided hey... if anyone would like me to update this I will. So... if you guys want me to write some more... then just let me know!**


End file.
